Where should one go to meet girls?

[Cage&Aquarium]

I am indeed new and I did indeed read not only the newbie guide but many of the articles here. If this question has been posted before, my apologies. Before the question, the backstory behind why I come here today to ask this (you impatient folks may skip this):

backstory

So I was sitting in front of my computer working on a campaign for an upcoming D&D game I'm running (I'm kind of a dork) when I call one of my buddies to see if I can borrow a book he had that I could use. Don't fall asleep now, I'm going somewhere with this! Well, a girl answers the phone, much to my surprise and it suddenly dawns on me she is not related to him. So, skip ahead, I find out my buddy has a g/f now and it's working out well between them. This raises a nasty issue I have had dwelling in the back of my mind for awhile now. You know, the little voice that says stuff like "You're wasting your life" and all that stuff. Now, I'm 22 and have only had 1 g/f. It was mostly online and we met up for a night or two (but no sex, just cuddling and all that). It's been a few years now and since learning of my buddies new g/f has brought up longings that I have stifled for awhile now. So rather than rub up against random women on a bus I came here to ask you this question...

/back story

Where can a guy who doesn't drink or smoke (see myself) go to meet girls and actually belong? I mean, bars are nice but if I'm not drinking I don't want to give potential interests the idea that I'm a stalker or some sort of rapist. I am aware that many women seem disinterested in meeting guys in a place unless they went there to meet a guy originally. So where should I go to meet women?

 

[FitnessGuy]

Do you have an education? Did you go to college? If you didn't, go back to school, tons of girls there, TONS. That's the single best place to meet girls imo.

 

[Cage&Aquarium]

Yeah, I did, but I'm going back in the fall. I went to a tech school before so there were really few girls there and the ones there were married. Thanks for the idea though.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

The best place to meet girls is outside of the house! And where outside of the house? Where ever you are at!

Your best bet is cold approaches if you are not active in any organizations, clubs, or other social outlets. Although a colld approach on the street is the hardest to master and succed.

Do a search under "cold approach" and also check out 'EFFORT's thread on his field report status and there is a cold approach in there that I recommended that should help you out - his thread is currently on the 1st od 2nd page.

 

[Skel]

I feel you Dawg. I use to be like you. Play on my computer all night long and stay in the house etc etc. I was like wtf am i doing? Even if you just go to a local bar andr drink and watch the football games there will be girls there. When you go shopping at the mall there are girls there. When you take out your trash there are girls walking their dogs. What im saying is just get out of the house and do things. Dnot wastte your life on the computer. You get nothing out of it.

 

[Christopher Tracy]

Man I don't drink or smoke either. But I still find women to meet. I go to college ( girls). I go to the mall (girls). I go shopping (girls).

Women our all around you if you just get out the house.

You know what today don't get on your computer I want you to talk to at least three new girls today. I'm not saying you have to ask them out.

Wednesday comeback and tell me what happend.

 

[Golden Arms]

Interesting thread.

I have to side with PuertoRican Lover - get out of your house and socialize more. Also - maybe your friends have friends who have friends, etc...

If you don't belong to a gym - join one - make more friends, build up your body. Personally, I don't like the idea of picking up girls at my gym, but I have made a few guy friends whom I hang out with. And once you have wingmen it becomes easier.

 

[Shot Callin]

Two things any newbie can do... in my opinion.

1. Start working out. Not only will you start to look better, you will start to feel better. That is the start to Djing, working on yourself.

2. Start talking to girls. If you are nervous about asking them out, you can start by just talking to them. Just talk to random girls... who the hell cares. Then when you have done that you can start with cold approaches. Remember it is ok in our society to go out and be talking to girls. That is more normal than sitting on the CPU or whatever.

It sounds like you wanna make some changes, so just start. Pick something like working out or join something social and start there. Then keep reading the bible and you will progress only as you practice.

 

[squirrels]

The species known as "girl" is actually present over a wide range of the United States and indeed the world.

 

[Rondavu]

First step is to stop playing D&D.

Don't go out looking for women. Do things that increase the odds that they will seek you. Prove you are worthy of their company. Women want men, not dungeon masters. A dungeon master isn't gonna find some way to pay the rent when the car breaks down and you have two kids to feed. Start learning how to be a real man in the real world competing with real men for the fair maidens. D&D my friend is the anthithesis of acting like a man. It is an escape from the responsibilities of the real world by creating an alternative one. I hear that one of the psyche questions on the test you take when trying to become a navy seal is "Do you, or have you ever played dungeons and dragons?" Guess what happens if you answer yes? No navy seal for you. D&D is a substitution for true leadership. It is an escape from the real responsibilities life poses.

You waited far too long so far to start learning how to be a man. Most guys start at 15 or 16. I hit the sack for the first time when I was 15 and a half. You have some catching up to do. The good news is the learning curve is fairly short, especially when your on here. Start off by making an effort towards meeting new people that you percieve as a little bit cooler than you. That's your first step. Just meet new people. Walk to the coffee shop and be more social than usual with the regulars. Your aim is not to invade their world though so be careful. Your aim is to understand a whole social culture you have alienated yourself from. If you want it, you will get it. Just don't expect it to be tomorrow. You haven't earned it through one week of resurrected yearning. You have to find it in yourself to change into a man who doesn't allow his interests to completely envelop him to the point of indifference to the outside world.

Walk around, smile always, be social, have a sense of humor and love people, especially new people. Be someone that people want to be around. Getting ladies is a side effect of having the right attitude. Go into discovery mode and find out what the difference is between your attitude and the right desirable one. This is the real question you should be asking yourself.

 

[Cage&Aquarium]

PuertoRican_Lover : Heh, well, I figured I'd prolly have to go out to find the ladies but I was just curious as to where. I am part of some orginizations with women in them and some of these are friends (real friends, not girls who gave me the "just friends" line).

Skel: The bar thing I tried but most the women were leary about being around me since I wasn't drinking. I can understand how they feel: it was sort of like I was just waiting for one of them to get drunk enough to take advantage of. Like the scary looking guy in those Lifetime original movies whose wearing all black, always scowling, and ends up raping you/your kid. The mall and just outside is a good idea.

Christopher Tracy: Good idea. I tried it and met three women in my town. Theywere nice enough but they were also all married but what can you do, right?

Golden Arms: I'm a pretty big guy but I'm also extremely muscular cause I lift weights twice a week. Also I have a job where I can walk around alot, but is, unfortunately, devoid of women. Not many girls dig the prison guard scene, I guess.

Shot Callin: I have covered number 1. That was easy. I have learned to talk to girls without much trouble so 2 is okay. My main problem is finding where all the single ladies hide out at.

squirrels: Heh, yeah, I hear they even make up the majority of the human race. They should be flocking to me, by these standards, but here I am.

Rondavu: I live in the bible belt and if I walked around telling everyone I played D&D, I'd have a hard time finding people who would talk to me without bringing up religon. My hobbies only come up if a girl asks me and they rarely do. I didn't know that about the Navy Seal psyche test but I can believe it and sort of see why. After all, you wouldn't want soldiers with any amount of intelligence or self awareness or they might actually start thinking for themselves. I agree with your point on going and finding yourself and though my hobbies don't control every aspect of my life I'll go out and talk to new people.

 

[pulchritudinous chum]

Persuing Hobbies

Look in to joining a club of some sort. There are car clubs, book clubs, and sports clubs in almost every town I'd bet.

A good idea is also taking dancing lessons or martial arts. Both raise confidence, they're likely to have women in them, and dancing will make you a stud in the club.

I have three sisters and they all love a guy who can dance, so naturally they taught me. It's probably the only reason I get phone numbers in dance clubs- not for the amount I can drink, not for a stunning body (that comes later at their place), and not for anything I say. Dancing is the best kino in my opinion.

 

[Rondavu]

Become a Bouncer

 

[madgame]

You said you didnt drink/smoke I guess. Now dont get me wrong, I dont think drinking is a real good thing to do or that its cool or anything. I only drink like once a week, sometimes twice and most of them times I only get a little tipsy...Im pretty confident this aint too bad for my health (I think drinking one beer a day is supposed to not have any bad consequences for your health at all...so drinkin like 4 beers once a week cant be that bad either I guess...besides if I look at my buddies and lots of other people they drink like multiple times of what I drink and are perfectly healthy). My point is: why not drink like once a week but just get a little tipsy so you can "socialize" better and hit the club/bar scene. Besides it also makes u act more confident (sounds dumb but thats how it is). I dont wanna put any pressure on you and tell u to start drinking, but maybe it might be worth considering it.

 

[Doppel]

I'd recommend picking up smoking and hanging out wherever the smokers hang out. If you're a black person make sure u smoke Newport Full Flavor cigarettes as they have over 1 mg of Nicotine per cigarette and if you are black you have to show that you are tough and can handle more nicotine than the general population.

 

[madgame]

@doppel: very funny dude...my advice wasnt a joke though. By the way did u know your name was german for "double" ?

 

[OddTech]

Doppel, stop polluting with your racist SH!T.