Where do YOU go to find woman to mack...and drawbacks? looking for ideas here...

[elvis aint dead yet]

You obviously do not live in the real world. While it's true you did give some advice, most of it is garbage if the guy in fact lives in small town america.

He probably doesn't live close to any nearby metropolitan cities. From what I'm assuming, he lives in a small town about an hour or so from a smaller city, say like an El Paso, Tx type of city or smaller. I'm sure if there was a major city close by, he'd visit it more frequently and wouldnt be asking this question.


Singles cruise was an idea. It might be BS, but for most people who do live in Small town america, the best thing to do is to get away from their town. Vacation, little mini-trip or something, to meet people outside their own vicinity.

I grew up in a small town where most of the women were either married or disappeared by 18. ANd you knew practically everybody in the town.

SMALL TOWN AMERICA is a few roads, a MAIN STREET, some small businesses, mom and pop stores, a few schools, and then after a couple of miles, nothing. ANd keep on driving and still nothing. And then finally you see another town. Another small town.

While thats not always the case, it normally is. Problem with most people in general is this, they assume everyone and everyplace is just like their own.

In many midwestern and southwestern states, it's small town america after small town america broken up by small cities. There aren't many metropolitan like cities like Chicago, NYC, or LA.

If you live near one, great, but many people do not. So don't assume what is good in the city is good for where they are at.

Look at many foreign people on this site who get riddiculed on t his site because they don't follow the DJ code. Too much BS on this site.

While you did give advice, I just said, some of it would be useless in a small town. The best thing for small town america usually is, to get out of small town america.

Real small town america is filled with people who grew up there, married young, and hate it there.

And it's also filled with many people who left and never came back. Most of the hot women and talented young people leave and never come back.

As i can attest, if the 40 year old guy is from small town america, he should know the ins and outs of it. If he's not, I can also attest, many of the women probably seem like HORES to him because they want to use him to get out of small town america.

Small town america is great for many things, but its not great for meeting single people. Yes, it's possible, but most likely, you won't meet many.

He's not 20, he's 40. So i'm sure he knows that.

I left small town america and never went back. Many of my friends did the same, some did not. If you've never been to small town america, then you really have no clue what it's about.

Small town america is not a small little town a few miles outside of Houston or chicago or NYC or philadelphia. Small town america might be some small place in Vermont with a police force of 2 people. Small town america might be a little community in texas with 500 citizens. Small town america might be some rural community in upstate minnesota. Or it could be some small village in kansas.

While everything is being built up and walmarts are spreading like wildfire, one thing still remains.

If you are 22 years old, single and just graduating college, the first job you take most likely will not be for small out of town small place in Nebraska. the pay won't be very high, and the opportunities won't always be there.

If your single, you move closer to a major city. Thats basically it. Otherwise all this BS about DJing won't mean anything in a small town. With a population of 500 or less, the odds of finding a good looking girl are slim to none. Why even take a chance at those odds?

I'd say get out, travel for a weekend to a major city, go with friends, go to las vegas, LA, NYC.

I do know, in small town america, people marry their high school sweethears almost half the time, if not more. There just aren't that many people.

 

[Jet Jockey]

Heres more info...

I see the problem... I guess it would be nice if everyone knew What I mean by Small town America. I live in the country. There are 3 towns about 10 miles away. each town has a population of only about 700 people. Its a farm community. Each town has a bar, which is a dive, A grocery store, a couple gas stations, maybe a lumber yard, and a feed store. Then nothing for miles. Kansas City is the biggest town around, but thats at least a 3 hour round trip if you drive real fast! If you are going to the central or southern part of KC tack on another 30 minutes or so.

Now KC is famous for Blues and Barbecue. Lots of fine restaurants. Lots of EXPENSIVE fine restaurants. I have done this.. Drive there for dinner. get my seat, scope the joint out.. Over there is a family with kids. Other side of me..looks to be Just a couple of guys making a business deal or something. Wait a minute..look at that booth..2 chicks..that one is kinda hot. hmmm behind them is th mens room. Think I'll take a little walk! So I walk on by, make eye contact ( and I am looking for her fingers is there a ring or not!) Coming back out I stop at their table. I see she has a plate full of whatever the house special is. I ask " hmm I was thinking about ordering that is it any good"? She looks up smiling, "yes it's very good" I say " maybe thats what I'll get then" "You've eaten here a few times then huh" Her: "Yes, I like it here" Me: My name is (fill in blank,) whats yours? Her: "my names Stacey, glad to meet you"! (smile) Me: " So you know KC pretty well"? Her: yes Me: Maybe you could show me around, and in return You could come see my ranch, its pretty cool if you like horses, here let me give you my number:. Her: Thats, ok, i don't think my husband would like that!!!
WTF. No ring, no indication of a husband. Alot of the gals my age don't wear there damn rings which confounds things even worse LOL. I used to think it was cuz they were on the prowl wanting a little extra, but have found it to not be true either. They Just don't wear the damn things half the time! Even at work, women that everyone knows are married don't wear there rings...Your best delivery and pickup is of no value if the chick is married..i don't do the married woman cheating thing anyway..

But that got me a little sidetracked. Bottom line is, KC is far enough away, you have to plan on going to a restaurant or whatever, leave early, and when you get there its most likely it wil be something like I described above..I know you just have to keep trying and take your chances. Most of the time you wind up with a expensive night on the town by yourself. I guess the whole question was aimed at upping odds of going somewhere where there would be more ELIGIBLE women. I liked some of the answers and will definitely check them out.

There is another smaller town about 45 minutes North of me (1 1/2 hour round trip) Not much there to do really, population about 10,000. Mostly fast food joints, a few bars, a few stores and thats about it. Out where I live chicks dig it tho. They "love" the country, etc.

They do leave small town America and go to larger cities. Whats left is a bunch of farmers and farm wives. So travel to the city is a must. Like anything else...you have to have a plan. It seems that being 20 would be nice..not everyone is married etc. I run into ALOT of married chicks, or if they aren't married they are divorced, and often a head case, that wants a emotional tampon and that ain't gonna be me. Then you have a few that never got married, and if they are my age, that usually means that either they are so stuck up, have bad traits, or they WANT to be single. In other words nobody wants to waste time on them, cuz they have a few problems. 40 year old women tend to be a bit more set in there ways then 20 year olds. Its a whole diffrent ball game really.

Networking with friends has by far been the best pay off, they are already screened a little bit. Trouble is, I am running out of friends with a single friend to tell me about. I have nexted so many of the dates I have had, and rightly so. All of this time and planning and groundwork, and she tells you she misses her ex, and then later tells you, she is a recovering alcoholic...etc etc.. Until you say thats it, and next her. GEEZ!

So looking for a place to go, where there may be a higher percentage of single woman 30's and 40's that are approachable, not just a piece of azz, and worth the effort. If i get shot down 10 times..it happens i understand..Just wanting to UP my odds!!

 

[MickoZ]

It is never too late to change... easily said, but why not?

What keep you in your town permanently actually?

I understand you are old and you are probably used to this town... but it will be nice to know what keep you up there dude.

 

[barbarianthemadserb]

How about them Russian women?

THere is a web site I belong to. They have these beautiful Russian women in Russia. THey hold these events 1-3 weeks long. You go and meet as many of those women as you want. They hold gettogether parties etc to introduce everyone. I have see pics and the girls there are beautiful and far outnumber the guys that participate in that program. THe women are looking for American husbands . All the legal lawyer stuff etc is there at location in case you meet someone you want to marry. THese girls want to leave Russia and are eager to please. I have a friend that did this and he married one about 8 months ago. Dang is he happy. Remember that this is a Russian girl and not a fvkin spoilt biotch American girl that constantly throws around her "rights" etc. I don't think I will pursue any more american females if this fvkin biotch I am with finally leaves (and there is a good bet that she will), I will go the Russian route. I will probably look for a Russian no older than 30 (I am 57)-that way by the time I am 70 or so I could give a fvck of any attitude change by them.hahahahaha. My friend who married that Russian girl has another friend who also did but that other friend has sent some of those Russian girls back and got new ones!
Here is there site you might want to get on. It has all info including costs, legal stuff, signing up for emails for upcoming events etc. http://www.loveme.com/tour/order/order.shtml#rform

 

[Chrispy]

At age 40, yeah, you don't have the school link thing.....do you have a lot of married friends who can look for you? I have a number older friends and they get more hook-ups through set-ups and blind dates...

I re-read the rest of the thread.....the above applies more so if you're in the city....maybe you can pull a movie thing and go to the city more often but use the line "I'm from the farm..I'm not from around here!"

 

[Derek Flint]

Consider re-locating to a more populated area.

 

[THA REALNESS]

Go to the wingman's forum. Post your dilemma and your location ask around there.

 

[Big Pappy]

Well, I'm in the real world. I understand your problem. I am closer to your age than I care to admit. Everytime I date a 19 year old or a 23 year old hottie, I don't know whether to be proud or ashamed.

Solution: Unless you're willing to make a habit of traveling out of town to a larger opportunity market, I would suggest two options that have helped me a good bit.

Volunteer - When you give of yourself, lightening the load of others and yet still not give in to the slightest whims of the ladies just because they ask you to do so, they know you're a man of some substance, rather than flash.

Find a part time job working weekends just doing something that would be fun. A guy your age who is getting a job just for the fun of it would be a managers dream employee. You would meet more people, you'd be productive and you can quit whenever you wish because you don't need the job.

Coaching - I coach a middle school chess team. The mothers are always setting me up with cousins, little sisters, big sisters and friends. (It's a Catholic middle school, so most of the moms are married, or I'd be tagging some of them

If all else fails, change your playground -- i.e. Move!

 

[Jet Jockey]

What keeps me here?

For those of you wanting to know what keeps me here, instead of moving to a better "playground" here is the answer.

My Father passed away about 4 years ago. He left behind this land and this house ( damn nice house). I have a Sis and a Bro, neither one of them really wanted to move here. For me to live here, I don't pay rent or a house payment even tho, it belongs 1/3 to each of us, until i buy them out.

Included in part of the deal, Is a chance to do something I have always wanted to do. I get to play rancher and I absolutely love it with a passion! I have a nice herd of registered texas longhorns. Some with horn spans of nearly 6 feet. I am able to raise and sell seed stock for other ranches to the tune of 2 grand per cow I sell. It is a opportunity i have wanted..a dream and it has finally happened!

To run away and cash out, just to be closer to the puzzy, would be just stupid and crazy. Like I said I have wanted this my whole life.

No chicks around for a hell of a radius is the downside. Now If I could just meet a sweet little cowgirl......

I have considered going to rodeos. I used to be a bullrider, and I have gotten too old for that. (bones don't heal now like they used to) . I am looking for a country western joint to look for someone that might like this lifestyle, but those for some reason aren't around like they used to be. I actually like Rock better anyway!

I liked the russin girl thing that was posted. hat is right...they are not spoiled little bytch brats like alot of American women. I do know that it is damn expensive to do tho....Alot of my money goes into the ranch and expanding that. I might just have to plan and "appropriate" some funding for that overseas thing LOL. I couldn't see me having the $$ before 6 months tho. Seems like forever when you have no company but cows, a dog a goose and a cat LMAO.

When I was in Highschool and college I was the one that dated the homecoming queens etc. I had no shortage of women.. kinda ironic really.

In the Air force as a fighter Jock, I got all the women too...another irony. I guess i always put what i wanted to do..my dreams and ambitions before any woman. I knew there were always other women, but a guys ambition and dreams, well ya gotta do what ya gotta do!

But as of late, I have been reviewing things. About ready to find the one, and get down to business. The older guys on here can relate to this I am sure. You younger ones..well many of you will be alot like I was...Gotta do what ya gotta do, before any chick is gonna tie ya down.

I am not "old" by any means. Many women guess me to be 30, not 40. I have been blessed there. I even had a ex call me up today, and tell me she still thought I was very nice looking, and she wished she hadn't screwed up and got nexted. But you know what is said about going back with ex's..it never works or it is AFC or something... So I never pursue her. She is a ex because I lost trust in her when we were together, hence the hesitation there.

You have all supplyed me with some food for thought. I will try out some of these ideas. I think I can make it work. persistence pays off!

Peace!

 

[elvis aint dead yet]

As they say, you might be going through some sort of mid life crisis. I think everybody does the older they get. You seem to be doing very well for yourself with your dreams and goals, but you just want a lasting LTR. Understandable.

I wish I could help, but from what I know of small towns of like you said, 700 people or less, it's just better to get out of town. Because in most cases, you can't even get rejected by 10 women, there just aren't that many in small town america.

 

[tomyv]

Sounds to me like you have 2 options. First one would be the honky tonk bars, you're a cowboy, country girls will go for that. The other one, and I can't believe I'm recommending it, would be the internet, it might work for ya.

 

[Jet Jockey]

Tomyv...Yes thats what it is looking like! Can't think of too many other spots, that I can go, and not have to spend a small fortune, or drive 2 hours to get to.

Moving just isn't a option.

 

[tomyv]

Jet, I know how this goes, to an extent. Mine is somewhat differant, but I do know how ya feel. I live in a small town, I like it that way. I'm a country boy, and that's ok with me. But, like you said, most girls leave, or are already taken. My option is that I do live about an hour from a major metro area, but the driving get's old, and I work so much that it just get's to be too hectic dating a girl that lives an hour away.

But, one piece of advice, don't move, just to meet women. That could be the most riciculous thing I've heard in a long time.

At this point I'm just taking some time off from worrying about it. After hunting season, well, I'll be prowling again!

 

[Jet Jockey]

I hear ya. I am all for self improvement and all, but to move and basically trash what you have accomplished, and worked hard for to make a reality, is out of the question. But i know there are still places to meet them..There are country girls with the same problem, an city girls who would kill to be able to have the peace and relaxation that comes with a life outside of the rat race. It can actually work in your favor. The statistical problem is, in the country finding them is almost a bigger challenge than knowing what to do once you find them. Its like hunting for any game...your rifle will do you no good unless you can determine where the game is hanging out. You won't even get to fire a shot.

I have had limited success off the internet. It can work if you can be smart about it. I guess it all has to be tempered with patience, patience and more patience. Like i said before alot of chicks my age are either married...or divorced, an if divorced sometimes they ARE the reason there was a divorce LOL. Makes it a whole lot stickier situation.

 

[Jet Jockey]

Thanks guys for your input! Any other suggestions are always welcome!