SteR
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2004
- Messages
- 768
- Reaction score
- 260
Hey guys,
This may be a little long as I'm interested in hearing where (if at all) I screwed up with this woman.
Basically I went out to the pub with some friends a couple weeks ago. One of my good mates brought along his gf and one of her friends. She was pretty cute.. I'd say a solid 7. Anyway we got talking, I did all the usual flirty crap and she responded and I ended up dancing with her/kissing etc etc. All ended well and I got her number and told her I'd give her a call for drinks next week.
Anyhoo I left her that night and didn't really feel it was worth pursuing. She told me that she'd split up with her bf of 5 years 3 weeks ago because basically he found out she cheated on him. Now to me, this was an instant red flag - I despise cheating. But she said he cheated on her first yada yada.. but still, this did put doubts in my mind but I thought I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. What also bothered me was the fact that she'd been with this guy for 5 years. Surely if you'd just broken up with someone, the last thing you'd want to do is get back in a relationship with someone so I didn't really expect much to come of this.
So the next day, this girl texted me like 5-6 times. I didn't initiate but I just send back playful texts etc. Turned out my friends who I was out with the previous night were having a party and she was gonna be there.. so I said I'd come along.
I get there and it was more of a 'gathering' which was cool because I got to talk to her. She wasn't drinking at all this evening which meant she was a little more reserved but it was cool.. we chatted a lot/joked around. It got to about 6 in the morning and I was exhausted (as was she) so we slept on my mate's bed while they were up all night. Now in this situation, I'm wondering whether I should've made a move on her? At the time, I honestly was so exhausted I just wanted to sleep, so I did. She had to get up early so shot off and then sent me some weird text saying 'she wanted to kiss me goodbye but was worried about her morning breath' .. but whatever.
So after the party she continues bombarding me with texts.. I reply but don't initiate. I then give her a call and arrange to meet up with her after work for a drink. We meet up and it was good fun. When she first gets there she seems really reserved again.. ie. sitting in the bar she's got arms crossed, legs crossed away but within a couple of hours and a couple of glasses of wine, she's getting very touchy, giving me sex eyes etc. I wanted to kiss her again in the bar but I couldn't as there were so many people sitting in close proximity I felt it would've made her feel a little awkward. So anyway we're chatting for like 4-5 hours and she's gotta leave because of work early so I walk her to the station and his her goodnight.
I must admit I didn't close it as well as I would've liked. The ideal time to kiss her would've been when she was in the bar but like I said, it wasn't the time. But yea, she reciprocated the kiss but then stopped halfway through and started saying 'aww, you don't think I'm a snob do you?" (in relation to me teasing her during the night) which made me feel like she didn't feel awkward about it so, whatever. Anyway I told her I'd call her again about going out and left her to head home. It's also worth pointing out that if this girl wasn't one of my best mate's girlfriend's friends, I probably would've tried getting her back to mine but due to the knock on effect this could have with my buddy.. I thought I better take it a little slower, also combined with the fact that she just split up with her boyfriend of 5 years.
So fastforward a couple of days and she's sent me a few texts as usual. So I call her up and say I've got plans for the coming weekend but if she's free on thursday we should go out. She didn't pick up her phone so I'd left a message. She didn't text me back till the following day, only to say 'I'm really busy this week (which was true because I knew in advance she had some big event going on with work that week) but sometime next week would be good'. I basically replied with some jokey texts and said ok I'll be in touch.
However, since then she hasn't contacted me once. This is weird because when I first met her, she was spam sending me texts like 10 a day kinda thing (bit stalkerish but it was cool I guess... it showed she was keen).
So yea, it's like 10 days after the drink and I'm wondering what the hell's going on? I know it's the guy's job to pursue but in this case.. I'm not sure I want to pursue her. I did enjoy her company but it does still bug me that a) she's only recently single after a long relationship and b) that relationship was ended because she cheated.
My gut instinct is to just leave it be.. I don't think it'd end well. I think at best I could probably try to get laid but I don't think that's fair on the girl and it'd put me in bad terms with my buddy's girlfriend.
What I'm really interested in is where along the line I seem to have screwed up? Obviously something's changed since she stopped contacting me but I can't see where? Did I screw up on the date? Maybe I didn't screw up at all? Any advice is greatly appreciated.
I just realised how long this is.. and I apologise for waffling haha but it'd be nice to hear some input. Thanks!
This may be a little long as I'm interested in hearing where (if at all) I screwed up with this woman.
Basically I went out to the pub with some friends a couple weeks ago. One of my good mates brought along his gf and one of her friends. She was pretty cute.. I'd say a solid 7. Anyway we got talking, I did all the usual flirty crap and she responded and I ended up dancing with her/kissing etc etc. All ended well and I got her number and told her I'd give her a call for drinks next week.
Anyhoo I left her that night and didn't really feel it was worth pursuing. She told me that she'd split up with her bf of 5 years 3 weeks ago because basically he found out she cheated on him. Now to me, this was an instant red flag - I despise cheating. But she said he cheated on her first yada yada.. but still, this did put doubts in my mind but I thought I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. What also bothered me was the fact that she'd been with this guy for 5 years. Surely if you'd just broken up with someone, the last thing you'd want to do is get back in a relationship with someone so I didn't really expect much to come of this.
So the next day, this girl texted me like 5-6 times. I didn't initiate but I just send back playful texts etc. Turned out my friends who I was out with the previous night were having a party and she was gonna be there.. so I said I'd come along.
I get there and it was more of a 'gathering' which was cool because I got to talk to her. She wasn't drinking at all this evening which meant she was a little more reserved but it was cool.. we chatted a lot/joked around. It got to about 6 in the morning and I was exhausted (as was she) so we slept on my mate's bed while they were up all night. Now in this situation, I'm wondering whether I should've made a move on her? At the time, I honestly was so exhausted I just wanted to sleep, so I did. She had to get up early so shot off and then sent me some weird text saying 'she wanted to kiss me goodbye but was worried about her morning breath' .. but whatever.
So after the party she continues bombarding me with texts.. I reply but don't initiate. I then give her a call and arrange to meet up with her after work for a drink. We meet up and it was good fun. When she first gets there she seems really reserved again.. ie. sitting in the bar she's got arms crossed, legs crossed away but within a couple of hours and a couple of glasses of wine, she's getting very touchy, giving me sex eyes etc. I wanted to kiss her again in the bar but I couldn't as there were so many people sitting in close proximity I felt it would've made her feel a little awkward. So anyway we're chatting for like 4-5 hours and she's gotta leave because of work early so I walk her to the station and his her goodnight.
I must admit I didn't close it as well as I would've liked. The ideal time to kiss her would've been when she was in the bar but like I said, it wasn't the time. But yea, she reciprocated the kiss but then stopped halfway through and started saying 'aww, you don't think I'm a snob do you?" (in relation to me teasing her during the night) which made me feel like she didn't feel awkward about it so, whatever. Anyway I told her I'd call her again about going out and left her to head home. It's also worth pointing out that if this girl wasn't one of my best mate's girlfriend's friends, I probably would've tried getting her back to mine but due to the knock on effect this could have with my buddy.. I thought I better take it a little slower, also combined with the fact that she just split up with her boyfriend of 5 years.
So fastforward a couple of days and she's sent me a few texts as usual. So I call her up and say I've got plans for the coming weekend but if she's free on thursday we should go out. She didn't pick up her phone so I'd left a message. She didn't text me back till the following day, only to say 'I'm really busy this week (which was true because I knew in advance she had some big event going on with work that week) but sometime next week would be good'. I basically replied with some jokey texts and said ok I'll be in touch.
However, since then she hasn't contacted me once. This is weird because when I first met her, she was spam sending me texts like 10 a day kinda thing (bit stalkerish but it was cool I guess... it showed she was keen).
So yea, it's like 10 days after the drink and I'm wondering what the hell's going on? I know it's the guy's job to pursue but in this case.. I'm not sure I want to pursue her. I did enjoy her company but it does still bug me that a) she's only recently single after a long relationship and b) that relationship was ended because she cheated.
My gut instinct is to just leave it be.. I don't think it'd end well. I think at best I could probably try to get laid but I don't think that's fair on the girl and it'd put me in bad terms with my buddy's girlfriend.
What I'm really interested in is where along the line I seem to have screwed up? Obviously something's changed since she stopped contacting me but I can't see where? Did I screw up on the date? Maybe I didn't screw up at all? Any advice is greatly appreciated.
I just realised how long this is.. and I apologise for waffling haha but it'd be nice to hear some input. Thanks!
