When She Mentions She Has A Boyfriend

[Juan_Man]

This was kind of a follow up about a girl I had a hard time finding a good opportunity to approach.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=110201

Well, I finally found the perfect opportunity to approach her away from her work and did so. We talked. Everything was going smoothly until she mentioned her boyfriend . I was a little disappointed but I did have a good conversation with her and enjoyed talking to her. So my question is, what do I do now?

 

[IM0001]

welcome to my world.

So far 9 out of 10 have REAL BF's

The single ones are all the compact parking spots between 2 suv's.

 

[IM0001]

"I have a BF."

PUA: "Cool. When's the wedding?" (switch subject after she laughs)

Heard that time after time. Tis a good comeback and has worked a time or 2.

Doesnt remove the fact that she DOES have a BF but you can keep it friendly and have a good convo and maby more

 

[Demon]

"I'm not interested in your boyfriend. I'm interested in you."

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Totally depends on the context. If you approach and she mentions she has a bf, she's definitely trying to give you a gentle hint that she's not interested either because she really does have a bf or she just doesn't want to be mean.

However if a girl is flirting with you, laughing at your jokes etc and you find out she has a bf, then you should continue to elevate the attraction because she could be on the verge of leaving him and be interested in you.

More times than not though, its a good idea to move on. You should always be gaming as many girls as possible anyway. Focusing too much on a girl who has a bf, even if she seems receptive to your advances is a fail-proof way to catch one-itis.




PIMP

 

[Juan_Man]

Totally depends on the context. If you approach and she mentions she has a bf, she's definitely trying to give you a gentle hint that she's not interested either because she really does have a bf or she just doesn't want to be mean.

However if a girl is flirting with you, laughing at your jokes etc and you find out she has a bf, then you should continue to elevate the attraction because she could be on the verge of leaving him and be interested in you.

More times than not though, its a good idea to move on. You should always be gaming as many girls as possible anyway. Focusing too much on a girl who has a bf, even if she seems receptive to your advances is a fail-proof way to catch one-itis.

PIMP

Yeah, I know the consequences of being fixated on one girl, single or not, so I'm trying to keep myself in check. As far as my "approach", it wasn't really an approach. I saw her sitting by herself and asked if I can join her. I didn't ask for the number, no compliments, didn't ask her out on a date, I just talked to her. She mentioned her boyfriend during our conversation. I figure most girls do this just to let you know their status. It sucked because I had been waiting over three months for the perfect opportunity to make my move. Oh well. I'm not going to step in because I think her boyfriend is a lucky guy (I'm sure she's lucky also) and it would be inappropriate. But I wouldn't mind stepping up to the plate if things don't work out.

 

[aelux]

Yeah, I know the consequences of being fixated on one girl, single or not, so I'm trying to keep myself in check. As far as my "approach", it wasn't really an approach. I saw her sitting by herself and asked if I can join her. I didn't ask for the number, no compliments, didn't ask her out on a date, I just talked to her. She mentioned her boyfriend during our conversation. I figure most girls do this just to let you know their status. It sucked because I had been waiting over three months for the perfect opportunity to make my move. Oh well. I'm not going to step in because I think her boyfriend is a lucky guy (I'm sure she's lucky also) and it would be inappropriate. But I wouldn't mind stepping up to the plate if things don't work out.

Situation I was recently in. Hooked up with a girl randomly and we saw each other every day for three days until the third day when she mentioned she had a boyfriend and was giving me all sorts of IODs.

Maintained contact and it turns out she's still interested. We've gone out a few times since then and she is very affectionate, holding hands, kino, calling me baby, falling asleep in my arms, etc...

... but this is after we hooked up. In your situation sounds like she just enjoys flirting. My best advice would be to pretend it didn't happen and see how it goes. The problem is in these situations the third wheel ends up feeling like second best... not a good feeling.

 

[Juan_Man]

My best advice would be to pretend it didn't happen and see how it goes. The problem is in these situations the third wheel ends up feeling like second best... not a good feeling.

What do you mean by pretend it didn't happen? Nothing happened.

 

[aelux]

What do you mean by pretend it didn't happen? Nothing happened.

Pretend she didn't mention her boyfriend. What do girls do when you mention you have a boyfriend.. do they say "oh" look dissapointed and lose interest? No they usually start fluffing their assets in an attempt to woo you.

It's a 5% shot but it semed like you automatically assume that her relationshop is perfect and she couldn't gain anything by starting to see you. Look at the opposite way... and if it doesn't work so the fvck what it's just some poon

That reminds me of another situation I was in with a chick who said she had a boyfriend and was giving me some major IOIs at the same time. Turns out her bf is a weakling and I'm confident I have more to offer. Wish I'd known that then

 

[aelux]

double post

 

[Disconnect]

Christ, there's no single advise that covers every girl. With some, you can get away with flirting after she told you she has a bf (maybe even get some action, but usually they just like attention). With others, you'll get a kick to the nads.

Here's how I do it: try to get a good idea if she's skanky or not. Broad def'n, but nonetheless... is she loud, slutty, and looks loose? If so, go ahead and keep making moves whether she has a bf or not. Resistance is usually weak, anyways . On the other hand, if she acts with some sort of composure (and has a bf), I leave her be. Even if it's possible to get action, why ruin another person's potentially good relationship?

Before the noobs start flaming me, here's my mindset: if a chick is a skank, then it's the other guy's fault for not seeing what kinda shyt he was getting into, and it's your job, no, your RIGHT, to take what's being given. But if you feel that you're convincing this girl to make a choice she'll regret, fvckin stop thinking with your **** and act with some common courtesy and respect for other people. Despite what the bible tells you, this world isn't all about you, and you can find yourself with a 250 lbs rugby player looking to break your ass because you didn't think through the consequences.

my 2c.