When I Get That Pre-Love Feelin'...

[Pecker]

At the risk of being flamed for being an AFC with One-itis...

There are some girls who I don't simply lust for, they make me feel. They're usually not incredibly attractive at the physical level, but they wake up something different in me. I do the nearly impossible: I feel SEXUALLY attracted to them as PEOPLE. It's the personality.

I really can't handle myself around these girls. They bring out the insufferable fool in me.

One girl I've had a chronic crush for cant stand me. She is probably the LEAST interested girl I've ever encountered on a somewhat cordial level (not including being dissed by a stranger). Despite her bitterness and generous insults, every now and then she can be quite sweet and when she puts it together right she IS physically attractive. I can't stop liking this girl, I try.

Some girls have a kind of energy I perceive and it makes me think that if given the chance I could fall in love with them. I've only met one other girl besides the aforementioned who falls into this category (she was much closer to interested).

What do you do when this happens? I'm so tired of the game. I couldn't possibly think of DJ stuff when I was around them, and its hard for me to grasp that by coincidence I will naturally have the same effect on them that they have on me, and that a worthwhile LTR will develop out of it.

Has anyone felt similarly?

 

[DjDreamer]

You get the feeling of butterflies in the stomach when you're in their presence?

Where do you normally meet these girls? I hope it's not near a chemical factory because your reaction could be the result of a gas leak. Just j/k.

I think you're problem is with this statement...

Originally posted by Pecker: some girls have a kind of energy I perceive and it makes me think that if given the chance I could fall in love with them.

...you seem to be in love with being in love.

Your action become awkward because in your mind you figure the Cinderellas won't find you Prince Charming enough for them.

The solution is to write poetry, ride horses and do other Prince Charming stuff OR you can take those girls off their pedestal resulting in you speaking to them like a normal human once again.

 

[Walden]

Nah man , l*ve is caused by a vitamin deficiency. Just mix some B12 tabs with a little bicarb and it'll clear right up.

 

[Pecker]

I'm not at all in love with being in love.

Most of the time, my ideal life would be sex three times a week with random hot girls, no love involved.

 

[Anson]

I also get "sexually attracted with their personality", as you so well described it. At first I thought of it as an AFC feeling - but I don't think that way anymore, as nowdays I've come to use that feeling to my advantage. It makes me enthusiastically interrested in them - and enthusiasim is never bad. It's excitement about meeting interresting people, which I think is the greatest fun there is.

It has nothing to do with loving being in love. You are not in love when you think: "wow, she has a great personality, I really would like to have sex with a woman like that..."
It is an AFC feeling only if you see it as nervousness. If you can take it for what it is - enthusiasm, mostly - you will learn to use it for your own benefit.

 

[One on One]

Just remember that she has faults too and don't put her on a pedestal. No problem with having feelings for girls, but keep it in check until you are sure she is the one. Don't committ to a LTR until you are absolutely sure and have played the field.

 

[MR_PERFECT]

This has happened to me a few times. I only fell in love with one, she was average looking with a 10 personality (for about a year anyway). I could also feel her presence. The first time we met, I was in a building where she was and I could feel something, I didn't know what, but I could feel something in the building. When I saw her, I knew it was her. I could actually feel when she was around or near by. From things she said, I knew she felt it too, but we never really talked about it.

Another, I became infatuated with and came to this board to get talked down from the ledge so to speak. I wasn't attracted to her, nor was I attracted to her personality, but I could literally feel her presence when I was around her. I could feel when she was near by, or about to walk into the room. The way I acted was completely uncharacteristic of me. I kissed her and did a little bit more and felt nothing. I wasn't turned on at all, yet, I still couldn't shake the feeling.

There have been other women I get to know as friends and they have the best personalities, but are unattractive. I mean unattractive on a universal scale. I started developing feelings because of their personalities and I overlook the physical.

 

[mikel]

If you guys only knew how individual looks are. Your unconscious mind draws you to these women, because they have certain attributes of your archetype.