When do I bring up my vasectomy?

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Hello gents,

Been meaning to field this question, got vasectomy 4 years ago, highly recommended if you have never tried it! :) Anyway, I've been thinking about when dating girls when to bring it up. If the girl tells me she doesn't want kids I immediately bring it up (this usually leads to immediate sex), if she says she definitely wants kids, I immediately bring it up (this usually ends the date). So this question is for when the conversation hasn't come up at all... Is it my duty to let her know or should I wait until she brings up kids?

And btw... this is for quality women with LTR potential, from the bottom of my heart I CANNOT WAIT for an FWB, a bar night hook up, or a one night stand to contact me and tell me she is pregnant with my child, I promise to share the story here if that ever happens!
 

Young OG

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I had a vasectomy 1.5 yrs ago. I only tell girls who already have kids or don't want them. I would keep your mouth shut otherwise or you might not get the pVssy.

If your considering a LTR, then I would wait till they get to know you better to tell them. Just avoid talking about having kids.
 

RickTheToad

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Hello gents,

Been meaning to field this question, got vasectomy 4 years ago, highly recommended if you have never tried it! :) Anyway, I've been thinking about when dating girls when to bring it up. If the girl tells me she doesn't want kids I immediately bring it up (this usually leads to immediate sex), if she says she definitely wants kids, I immediately bring it up (this usually ends the date). So this question is for when the conversation hasn't come up at all... Is it my duty to let her know or should I wait until she brings up kids?

And btw... this is for quality women with LTR potential, from the bottom of my heart I CANNOT WAIT for an FWB, a bar night hook up, or a one night stand to contact me and tell me she is pregnant with my child, I promise to share the story here if that ever happens!
N-E-V-E-R. Get it?

You should be wearing a condom unless you are both monogamous AND had a full panel STD test including da herp 1 & 2.
 

AttackFormation

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The timing will generally* vary by your position on the antisocial spectrum. The more antisocial you are, the more OK you will think it is to intentionally cheat well-meaning people of their time justified by your own cynicism and amorality. And obviously vice versa the less antisocial you are.

*The exception is if the woman herself is a piece of trash of a person, but you need sexual release. I still don't advocate stooping down to the level of others but in that case I think it's a neutral option to deceive her.
 

RickTheToad

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The timing will vary by your position on the antisocial spectrum. The more antisocial you are, the more OK you will think it is to intentionally cheat well-meaning people of their time justified by your own cynicism and amorality.
One assumes that this is just a FWB or a pump in dump type of situation. Not a relationship where the dude is unjustly gaming the lady in false hopes for a spawn.
 

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AttackFormation

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One assumes that this is just a FWB or a pump in dump type of situation. Not a relationship where the dude is unjustly gaming the lady in false hopes for a spawn.
If it is there would be no need to talk about something like this. I would assume he asks because he suspects she thinks it's going somewhere. Otherwise there's no point and you may as well ask when you should tell her you have no pets or what you typically eat for dinner.
 

RickTheToad

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If it is there would be no need to talk about something like this. I would assume he asks because he suspects she thinks it's going somewhere. Otherwise there's no point and you may as well ask when you should tell her you have no pets or what you typically eat for dinner.
Good point. Again, I am just saying, from a FWB or STR, there's no need to bring that up.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Hello gents,

Been meaning to field this question, got vasectomy 4 years ago, highly recommended if you have never tried it! :) Anyway, I've been thinking about when dating girls when to bring it up. If the girl tells me she doesn't want kids I immediately bring it up (this usually leads to immediate sex), if she says she definitely wants kids, I immediately bring it up (this usually ends the date). So this question is for when the conversation hasn't come up at all... Is it my duty to let her know or should I wait until she brings up kids?

And btw... this is for quality women with LTR potential, from the bottom of my heart I CANNOT WAIT for an FWB, a bar night hook up, or a one night stand to contact me and tell me she is pregnant with my child, I promise to share the story here if that ever happens!
I would "keep trying" & & & not mention the vasectomy lololol.

I am not a good person :)
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I had a vasectomy 1.5 yrs ago. I only tell girls who already have kids or don't want them. I would keep your mouth shut otherwise or you might not get the pVssy.

If your considering a LTR, then I would wait till they get to know you better to tell them. Just avoid talking about having kids.
+1

Agreed.

Women sperms jack men, lie about fertility and birth control.

Before 40, i may do a vasectomy. My boys can swim.
 

corsica

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I'm thinking about doing a vasectomy. If I plan on having kids, it'll be at 50 (max) with a 20-25yo woman. I was never certain about having kids but now I know you can freeze your sperm and inseminate the girl without risking of having triplets (like in artificial insemination to an old woman). So I see no reason to not have one.

I'm looking for the non-scalpel method.
 

Never try to read a woman's mind. It is a scary place. Ignore her confusing signals and mixed messages. Assume she is interested in you and act accordingly.

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RangerMIke

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I don't share this with women. I see no reason that any chick needs to know this.

Here is some unsolicited advice....

Some men talk and share too much about about themselves. You should always stop and ask two questions about sharing personal information with women:

(1) Is her knowing this about me going to help me? If the answer is no... keep your mouth shut. You might say... "Well it might not necessarily 'help' me but it won't hurt." Same answer keep it to yourself. If it doesn't matter if she knows this or not, then just keep your mouth shut.

(2) Anything you tell a chick, will be widely shared by her friends in the chick network. So unless you want everyone in the godd@mn world knowing you had a vasectomy then keep your trap shut.

(3) She likely thinks you are lying about it anyway so what is the point.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Not disclosing information she didn't ask for isn't lying.

Why would you randomly volunteer information that would hurt your chances of having sex with them? You aren't marrying the girl.

Most girls don't care about condoms, IMO. Can only think of one or two that made me put one on.
 

SW15

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I only tell girls who already have kids or don't want them. I would keep your mouth shut otherwise or you might not get the pVssy.

If your considering a LTR, then I would wait till they get to know you better to tell them. Just avoid talking about having kids.
Not disclosing information she didn't ask for isn't lying.

Why would you randomly volunteer information that would hurt your chances of having sex with them? You aren't marrying the girl.
I would not recommend disclosing a vasectomy in a lot of cases. Much of this depending upon your own goals in interactions and relationships with women.

Men who have vasectomies have a difficult time dating women in their 20s and 30s, who will often drop a man if they find out he has a vasectomy. This is even true if a woman isn't planning on having kids soon and/or the interaction is more casual than serious. Women do like to know that they could have a kid at some distant point in the future with the man who is having sex with them. It's possible to disclose a vasectomy for a woman who is plate status/casual sex only if she's 18-24 and it's totally casual, but I still wouldn't recommend doing that. Think about the typical 21 year old woman who is typically dealing with 21-25 year old men who usually don't have vasectomies. If a 21 year old woman finds out about your vasectomy as a 30+ guy, she won't know how to process that information and she might shut down and exit.

Men who have vasectomies have a narrower dating pool if they desire LTRs as a lot of women will drop a man for having a vasectomy on the basis that she wants a child someday. Also, vasectomies are permanent and condoms do allow for a man to have children eventually if he wants them.

Men with vasectomies get an advantage in dating single moms who don't want more kids. That's the largest group of women who see a man with a vasectomy as advantageous.

I didn't get a vasectomy because I didn't want to deal with shrinking my potential dating pool and deal with the potential issue of whether or not to disclose a vasectomy.

Childless single men who don't want kids have a narrow dating pool if they disclose that information so in no way is it advantageous to disclose. If a man doesn't have a vasectomy, he can say he's "open to kids" if he hasn't had a vasectomy and that's technically true.

Most girls don't care about condoms, IMO. Can only think of one or two that made me put one on.
Roosh wrote an article in 2010 called "American Girls Don’t Use Condoms Anymore"


The only thing on this that may have changed are laws surrounding abortion availability in the USA. Roe vs. Wade was overturned in June 2022 and each state now has different abortion laws. Even with the changes in abortion law, most women are using some form of birth control. Some women who don't want to use birth control now might be more insistent upon condoms.
 

Barrister

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I can't imagine why this would ever come up in a casual dating scenario. If you are in a committed LTR where she discloses she really wants kids and wants to know if you want the same that is different. If you are just casually dating, there is literally no reason to ever disclose the information or even bring it up.

If you are in a more committed relationship, you may have to disclose it, but that is WAY down the line of time in an LTR in my opinion. You shouldn't be considering a child with a woman until probably at least the 1.5 year mark of a LTR until you have seen the honeymoon phase wear off (not that this is proof against her going crazy after birth anyway), but I can see the conversation being brought up well before that mark by the woman. I think you can realistically dodge it and not disclose it until at least 1 year - give or take a few months depending on the circumstances.
 

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