When did you realize that you were an AFC

[SpeedRunner]

After having turbulent relationships, i surfed the net for awnsers. And the internet told me what I needed to hear, I was an AFC.

That was two months ago, October 2004.

I'm an rAFC and have made siginificant progress in this time.

Assuming none of us were born DJ's, when did you realize you were AFC?

 

[i am me]

I never really said "I'm an AFC!" but I realized that I wanted to change my life around last summer. I'm pretty thoughful so I figured "I'm still in high school...I need to improve myself while I'm still young. It'll make more of my life THAT much easier." Also, I think I got a lot of influence from rap music...I like rap and no one would ever listen to a shy/AFC rapper. In fact, shy people get almost no where in the world and are so limited because they are scared to show individuality. This makes it hard to enjoy life (the main purpose for living).

Yeah. That's my story. I'm proud of myself.

 

[unistork]

I came across a nice guys page on MySpace and he would leave comments like "Happy Halloween. Take care." "I missed your call *tear*" and I thought to myself "What in the name of fvck? This guys never gonna get a girl" and it just so happened on one of his recent blogs he is ranting about how he's a nice guy he pulls out chairs, he holds doors, etc., and he can never get girls haha....

 

[true|hockey]

over a year ago, I read a post on the bodybuilding forums by a guy named sev. He described something called One-itus ( which I thought was an STD at the time), and it described me perfectly. It was a wake up call, so to speak, as it hit so close to home. One could say I "woke up" at that point, and have changed things for the better from that point on.

 

[huge_guy_pimpin]

Originally posted by SpeedRunner
After having turbulent relationships, i surfed the net for awnsers. And the internet told me what I needed to hear, I was an AFC.

That was two months ago, October 2004.

I'm an rAFC and have made siginificant progress in this time.

Assuming none of us were born DJ's, when did you realize you were AFC?

i believe i was born dj.

 

[Vincent]

Re: Re: When did you realize that you were an AFC

Originally posted by huge_guy_pimpin
i believe i was born dj.

Sure you were.


When my friend sent me Pook's Be a Man! 2 and a half years ago.

 

[FunnyCide]

After reading, Pook's 15 lessons and realized I was the young man he was slapping around. Another saved AFC to Pook credit. I sent it to another friend, after I went out one night with a new found attitude and recieved warm welcomes from the ladies. Now we're both walking toward DJ path, I'm on a slight jog ofcourse.

 

[JT47319]

About 3.5 years ago when I moved to California and graduated from college. After putting on a good 30 lbs of weight & muscle, and interracial dating, I wasn't hurting badly for female compansionship, fullfilled plenty of raunchy sexual fantasies, corrupted innocent coeds, etc.

I've always been used to pretty much succeeding at whatever I wanted to, but compared to the relative ease of getting girlfriends in college via social circles, I wasn't used to how difficult it was to pick up chicks in LA and Hollywood.

My Game just wasn't up to par to the competition. The Game is a lot harder out here and all the hot girls have been Playettes for their entire life. So I set out to raise the bar for myself and improve my abilities and attract more women. It's still damn hard out here in Hollywood, but I feel satisfied knowing that I can successfully compete with the guys who are better looking, richer, taller, etc.

 

[Bonhomme]

Article that opened my eyes

An article by a woman named Jennifer Metcalf entitled "Too nice" isn't nice at all. It's rotten" was the big eye-opener. Bible-worthy stuff.

Here's a link to it: http://www.modernman.com/women/180-1.html

 

[frivolousz21]

when I was looking forward to smoking blunts for over a yr..rather than getting ass!

 

[ego]

I'd been playing a role to get girls for like one year. Sometimes it's been working, but most of the time - Nah. I got some girls, but not the girls that i wanted.

What happened with almost all of the relations was me become the perfect friend.

How did I act? Let me tell you.

I were this all-understanding, clever, and nice guy. I said smart things, explained to girls how to solve their problems, and fights with boyfriends, and after a while became some hobby psychologist, who a lot of the girls would talk to if they had any problems.

They confirmed that I were understanding, very understanding, and also trustable. They also liked me a lot - But almost all the time as a friend. A understanding friend, who didn't behave like other guys.

I saw stupid jerks, with nothing inside of their skulls get the girls that i'd been talking to, and meeting, for months.

Unfair I thought. Yeah, life's unfair.

I was too clever, too friendly, too nice, too understanding... etc. etc.



I started to read at this website around one month ago. BANG! What I saw was post after post with AFC-describtion who fitted well on me.

I started to understand why I didn't get any girls. And I also understood that it would lead me to nothing if i didn't stop.

So I did.

No more mr. Nice guy. No more friendly attitude, no more hobby-psychologist sessions.

I'm still AFC to a lot of girls, and i'm still acting AFC in some situations - But i can tell that i'm changing.

I went on a date with a girl yesterday. Going on another one tomorrow, and a third one on sunday.

A 4:th girl is calling and sending SMS cuz she wants a date too.

Last but not least a 5th girl told me how boring her sex-life with her boyfriend is, and that she would like to "try something different" . Too much information

Nothing has ever been like this before - And it's getting better every day.

(Just had to tell) :]

 

[Abbott]

I didn't know what the term "AFC" meant back in the day, but I still knew of the general concept (a.k.a. the "loser" concept).

It was probably in the middle of high school when I figured out what a loser I was, by which time it was too late for me to change that persona while in high school. Back then, people might have even called me a "nice guy" (the horror).

I can't remember how I found this site, but BOY am I ever glad I did! Still no women but it has certainly helped me change some things that weren't working out very well for me.

I took the opportunity of the fact that I was finishing high school to make a point of being better as soon as I got out.

Now, it's hard to imagine that I'm the same person. People I meet now will hardly think that I was once a bit of a loser.

Ben

 

[Fenderules]

way back a couple years ago i realzed this would i let myself get over obsessed with chick. Anyway i was blanting about it on some site and one user posed a link that was basically a "woman view on nice guys" I then saw who i really was.


The problem was that i became unhappy with who i was so i felt worse and this dragged on to high school. I was so worried of coming off too nice that i never got close to any girls. This means with girls i just thought as friends too. So i ended up buttF*cking myself. Finally the end of last year im like "screw it" and i started talking to chicks and being as forward as i could. It worked fine, i got the numbers and made sure they knew i thought they were attractive. The problem was i didnt let it get further then that. This one girl really got into me and phoned me all the time. The problem was i was wating for the perfect moment for me and her to hook up. That moment came many times but i never saw it. So she lost interest and ended up getting a bf while i gained interest. While i didnt expose myself as needy and clingy, i didnt expose myself at all. So now i dont care anymore.

 

[LikerOfWomen]

I've always known I was an AFC, but it's only been in the last few weeks that I realized that a) there's an actual term for it, and b) there's something I can do about it.

 

[TizZle]

I started to realize this about a year ago but never really faced my problem... I am here today after about a year and had like 3 oneitises during that time. the recent one was with i would call an HB5 or so. Something went wrong the fourth time we had met and i knew she had seen her ex 3 times while having 3 ONS's with me in the same time period. I got fed up with her but i realized she wasn't really good g/f material b,c distance is a red flag in my situation and she was still seeing him. BUT i still felt the oneitis probably because she took my viriginity and we(or maybe i) had a lot of fun while i was up there b,c sex is something new and fun to me and she was the one i shared the experience with. We went out and danced 2 of the times i was up there and went to a couple parties and she started to grow on me. <<<< stupid AFC thoughts... then i realized kind of what was going on... she still had feelings for her b/f so i went to the internet after i got pissed and found this place and the DJ bible... Oh boy i thought, i make major AFC moves, granted some of which were when i was totally blitzed drunk and being pissed at her at the same time but they were still chump mistakes by bible standards. I told her i was going to take a couple steps back b,c i felt myself falling into a major case of oneitis but i didnt tell her the reason. I told her i just wanted to be friends but I'm not talking to her right now b,c i choose not to. Now that brings me today. I have identified most of my flaws and I'm laying the ground rules for my mindset when i enter back into the field so that most of the flaws will most likely be corrected.

 

[Virtú]

I didn't start to care about girls and my sex life until my freshman year in college (2002), but I only came here to do something about it one month ago.

Unfortunately, after reading some good posts, I realized that my problems went far beyond socialization and sex.

They, and every other difficulty I've faced, was the result of the fact that I genuinely did not care about myself, my future, and life in general.

 

[So Many Ways]

I'd say it was around March of 2003. I had always known that something was wrong but Ifelt I was destined to be unsuccessful with women and there was nothing I could do about it, I just figured there was something about me that was repulsive and that I was helpless to change that. I could do things like get a girl's number at a club and I've even been approached a small handful of times but women would always lose interest immediately. I figured that all women wanted thugs and since I wasn't a thug I was assed out.

When I realized something was horribly wrong and that I need to do something about it was March of last year. One of my coworkers was going to Vegas and he asked me for advice on what to do in Vegas. I told him to go and get laid, while me female coworkers rolled their eyes. I was being somewhat sarcastic but he took me seriously. The following Monday, he comes back giddy with a big grin on his face saying he got laid. He had approached several women and got rejected 15 times but the 16th one liked him and they slept together. Now this guy is younger than me but he's a recent immigrant, balding, and short but he pulled it off. That's when I realized something was wrong and I needed to do something about it.

This was way before this site or anything. I started asking advice from a couple of friends who were good with women. First I got some tips from a coworker on how to clear up my razor bump problem so I no longer had to deal with that. My roommate, who's a player suggested that I put my profile on match. I also started putting more of an effort into talking to women when going out. I also slowly started updating my out of date wardrobe.

Slowly there was progress. My profile on match got responses by email which surprised me and I was able to get them on the phone and arrange dates easily. I met a couple of chicks at bars and arranged dates with them. It kind of went from there but there was still frustration, even though the first couple of dates went well, the women would universally lose interest, plus I wasn't getting laid. Iwasn't getting past making out.

I asked my friends for help and they would say "you should just f*ck her" and I'd respond with "how". None of this stuff made sense and I wasn't getting it so I went online to search for help. I was on the askmen.com site and I saw a link to David Deangelo's double your dating site and I immediately subscribed to the email list and ordered the ebook. I signed up for the askmen.com boards (I din't know about sosuave or fastseduction or any of that stuff yet) and there were a couple of knowledgable guys that gave me some tips. I then ordered the interview series and Tyler's interview kind of got me going and I started implementing C&F for the first time.

I got to the point where I was able to seduce friends of friends and was getting more success in bars and clubs but I wasn't meeting the kind of women I wanted. Around March of this year, a year after I started my mission, I decided to take a step back from everyting, re-evaluate everything and figure out what I wanted. I also wanted to get my inner game in shape and my brutal work schedule began taking its tole on me physically. I haven't done that many approaches in the last few months but taking a break was good since I know have a clearer goal and i know what kind of women I want and don't want. My skills have gotten rusty so I need to jump head first back in, plus I need to fix my work situation and get a normal 9-5 instead of this swing shift weekend job I have now.

 

[klaz]

two times Very closely related:

When I realised that my last unpaid sex was over 6 months ago, and then when I relised that I felt imtimidated by attractive women.

I mean WOW!. Scary. I'm AFC. Awful. But its not the end. There's Boot Camp! WooHoo!