When an EX phones up, saying "you're the onlu one I can talk to about this"

Toast123

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An Ex that I haven't seen for a year and a half phoned me up, very emotional and on occassion crying during the call. Her family life is a bit bad right now and she says I'm one of the only ones she can talk to....

She broke up with me 1 and a half years ago, I went NC instantly, for six months.

Since then we have had occassional contact, often talking positively about the realtionship and remembering the good times.

Often she compliments me and tells me how great I was and stuff, fair play nice that we are on good terms.

I'm meeting her for the first time on Saturday. I asked her if she wanted to meet up two days ago, then last night she made the call for emotional support.

Any advice? Where do you think she's coming from?
 

loveorlust

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Toast123 said:
An Ex that I haven't seen for a year and a half phoned me up, very emotional and on occassion crying during the call. Her family life is a bit bad right now and she says I'm one of the only ones she can talk to....

She broke up with me 1 and a half years ago, I went NC instantly, for six months.

Since then we have had occassional contact, often talking positively about the realtionship and remembering the good times.

Often she compliments me and tells me how great I was and stuff, fair play nice that we are on good terms.

I'm meeting her for the first time on Saturday. I asked her if she wanted to meet up two days ago, then last night she made the call for emotional support.

Any advice? Where do you think she's coming from?
Based on your post, I'd say she needs a friend right now. Not to say you guys can't hook up sexually again, since most likely you guys have done it already. And who knows, maybe now is your chance to win her back. If that's what you want. Or just be a friend. Nothing wrong with that.

Good luck and all the best to you.
 

mayfair

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Sounds like loveor lust is on the money! Looks like this girl really trusts u and is probably looking for a straight up unbiased opinion on her troubles

Chances are you could use this situation as a chance to get your leg over with an emotional ex who clearly holds u in high regard or just play it safe be her friend in her hour of need then take it from there when shes out the woods

Really depends on how u want to play it, defo worth noting u must have been in her thoughts a good bit if shes made contact after all this time

Good luck bro
 

Zarky

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Tell her you'll be happy to help if she sucks your c*ck first. Seriously. See what she says. What do you have to lose? Emotional tampondom?

Yeah, in rereading your OP, she is setting you up to be her emotional tampon:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Emotional Tampon

You owe nothing to some b*tch who broke up with you years ago. Any woman who did that to me would have to promise a good c*ck sucking for me to even get off the couch to hang out with her.
 

SoSuave666

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Zarky said:
You owe nothing to some b*tch who broke up with you years ago. Any woman who did that to me would have to promise a good c*ck sucking for me to even get off the couch to hang out with her.
As much as my inner AFC might want to disagree with this, Zarky is right. She has no right to come at you like this. These women need to either sh!t or get off the pot. If she wants your emotional support, you better get your sexual support out of it.
 

Toast123

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No, we were really close and the relationship didn't end on a bitter note.

I'm not trying to score points or revenger fvck her or anything.

My interest in her isn't very high, so when I meet her I'll do the right thing and be there as a friend.

I won't be a doormat of course, I'll be there on MY TERMS and my terms alone, anything happens I don't like then I'm gone and back into NC again for however long is needed...maybe indefinitly.
 

backbreaker

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"damn girl you need some new friends"

"click"



"dial tone"
 

TonyBaloney

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OP, when it ended, how quickly did you move on with your life?

Did you feel resentment or bitterness for the first few months or up to when NC stopped???

Why did it end out of curiosity? Have you f ked or had rellys with many girls since?

Tony
 

coochieman

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On YOUR TERMS you said? Fine, the make sure you do that, SELF RESPECT is key....

On a lighter side, i support zarky's "Gimme a coccksuck!". Hey, nothing to lose.

If I were you anyway, i really wouldn't be part of all this. Its someone else's job.
 

vatoloco

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Two words for you, my friend: Emotional. Tampon.
 

GhengisT

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I'm all for being support in time of need when there's commitment & relationship in play. E-Tampon is in your future bro. Don't let previous AFC habits do you in.

On a side note- I don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die..
 

Toast123

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Interesting developments.

I ended up going out for a drink with her, then back to her place, then in her bed.

No sex though, just making out and stuff.

Now I'm going NC on her ass.
 

Toast123

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I win? If I go NC?

Yeah I'm gona do it, I mean we didn't fall out or anything it was a nice night and we spent half of today in bed but I left, she messeged me on FB after so I replied and now I'm going NC.

NC if anything will make her wonder why the hell I'm not giving her attention won't it? Good thing yeah?
 

Rubirosa

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Suggest a restuarant to meet at to talk, and set a date/time.
Pull a no-show and wait for her call.....
When she asks where you're at, tell her that you hooked up with a hot babe and you lost track of time.....(You're "friends" right ? Friends talk with each other about their relationships.......Oh, too mean ? Afraid of hurting the feelings of the b#@ch who dumped you ?)
 

Toast123

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I'm sensing some projection from some people on this board....caused by a lot of resentment towards a former lover lol.

I'm not trying to get one up on her, I don't view every woman as someone I have to emotionally crush the moment they had a place in my heart....yes a lot of the time people are selfish and hurt those they care about but if we take the attitude that all women are some evil entity created to crush our souls then how can anyone ever trust? With that mindset you'll CONSTANTLY be waiting for anyone you share a relationship with to mess you over....

I don't live in that state of fear. I've been hurt a few times and know how to deal with it, it doesn't become me, I move on.

In this case I've momentarily shared a night with an ex, I'm not going to go all wussy on her ass and start trying to manipulate her to get back with me....the relationship ended for a reason. It should and will stay ended.

I just don't see why every blue moon I shouldn't enjoy a night with her if she's willing.

So for now I'm going to tell her we should not see eachother for a while and communication should also stop. For practical reasons as well as emotional ones.
 

Rubirosa

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Toast123 said:
I'm sensing some projection from some people on this board....caused by a lot of resentment towards a former lover lol.

I'm not trying to get one up on her, I don't view every woman as someone I have to emotionally crush the moment they had a place in my heart....yes a lot of the time people are selfish and hurt those they care about but if we take the attitude that all women are some evil entity created to crush our souls then how can anyone ever trust? With that mindset you'll CONSTANTLY be waiting for anyone you share a relationship with to mess you over....

I don't live in that state of fear. I've been hurt a few times and know how to deal with it, it doesn't become me, I move on.

In this case I've momentarily shared a night with an ex, I'm not going to go all wussy on her ass and start trying to manipulate her to get back with me....the relationship ended for a reason. It should and will stay ended.

I just don't see why every blue moon I shouldn't enjoy a night with her if she's willing.

So for now I'm going to tell her we should not see eachother for a while and communication should also stop. For practical reasons as well as emotional ones.
Excaliber called....Your White Knight uniform is ready
 

Nik TPT

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First, you shouldn't even answer. Second, if you did answer and she said that, then just hang up.
 
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