Whats your opinion on moving in with your LTR?
- Thread starter cola
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mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Figure out the bill payment and chores divisions up front. I'd also declare that XYZ of time without sex or physical intimacy indicates we are no longer in a relationship and you will start to part ways. Also a cheating clause.
I live with my GF, I enjoy it. She does the majority of the housework. She does 75% of the cooking.
We have sex when we want to, some nights neither of us have the energy. Still have it at least 3 nights a week though.
We figured out a fair way to pay the bills up front, we pay the same proportion of our wage into a joint account.
She asks when anything is needed for the house, I have the final say on whether it gets purchased or not.
I am always willing to walk away. I could afford the bills myself and soon will be in a position to buy her out.
We have sex when we want to, some nights neither of us have the energy. Still have it at least 3 nights a week though.
We figured out a fair way to pay the bills up front, we pay the same proportion of our wage into a joint account.
She asks when anything is needed for the house, I have the final say on whether it gets purchased or not.
I am always willing to walk away. I could afford the bills myself and soon will be in a position to buy her out.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Yeah but it's better to have in house pvssy especially if it helps out and pays. Reality in our country most people have a roommate either that or living paycheck-to-paycheck support themselves. So if your gonna have a roommate might as well be your generous and kind woman who you have a good sex life with.
Paying into a bills account is good. Most chicks need a lot of daily reassurance. Don't ever skip the kiss goodbye and kiss hello unless she's been a b**** of course. Teach her about cave time when you first come in each night. Don't move into her place that's a fatal tactical mistake. Best you move into a new place together and make sure it's better than her old place. Remember every time you come home you need to spend a little bit of time reconnecting the relationship. Might only be 20 minutes but make sure she has your full attention for those 20 minutes.
And yes I've had a lot of LT Rs and those are all mistakes I've made
And obviously don't neglect your interests or live in each other's pockets probably doesn't need saying here.
And yes I've had a lot of LT Rs and those are all mistakes I've made
And obviously don't neglect your interests or live in each other's pockets probably doesn't need saying here.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
What if she's resistant to reconnect time and intentionally maintains a extra distance? I know that time is important for bonding and connectivity as well, was just wondering your opinion.
Low interest level.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
Well.... it's not for me. But I would ask if she is part of the crew or a passenger.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Interest level can be adjusted, IE: ignore, or getting more into yourself or your life, also including in situations that they have a high interest.
Well ideally she should be more into maintaining the relationship than you. Sorry that would be a warning sign for me. I do remember reading somewhere that all relationships are an approach intimacy or withdrawal the b**** of it is that normally each partner is at a different stage.
TheMonkeyKing
Master Don Juan
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I did this a few times in my twenties. Though I benefited (and learned) a lot, a couple of times it worked out quite badly, mainly because of a poorly maintained frame. In hindsight, I would give aspiring cohabiters the following advice:
-Before you hit 30 years old, take serious consideration to cohabiting with a woman; furthermore take even greater consideration marrying her. Insomuch as, don't do it. People are too immature at this stage. What people want classically changes dramatically between the ages of 25-40, especially men.
-As per Rollo's advice, take serious consideration to cohabiting with a woman you are not planning to marry within the successive 6 months.
-Do what you want, with who you want, when you want. In fact A man with a life and plan will probably be spending most of the time out of the house anyway.
-That being said, presumably by the point to cohabitation, you'll be exclusive with the girl. You therefore must continue to game her, while understanding how the game changes in LTRs.
-Always have an exit strategy and get out clause which can be executed at any point with immediate effect; make sure she has the same option.
-Never move in with someone out of necessity (like I have before).
-Before you hit 30 years old, take serious consideration to cohabiting with a woman; furthermore take even greater consideration marrying her. Insomuch as, don't do it. People are too immature at this stage. What people want classically changes dramatically between the ages of 25-40, especially men.
-As per Rollo's advice, take serious consideration to cohabiting with a woman you are not planning to marry within the successive 6 months.
-Do what you want, with who you want, when you want. In fact A man with a life and plan will probably be spending most of the time out of the house anyway.
-That being said, presumably by the point to cohabitation, you'll be exclusive with the girl. You therefore must continue to game her, while understanding how the game changes in LTRs.
-Always have an exit strategy and get out clause which can be executed at any point with immediate effect; make sure she has the same option.
-Never move in with someone out of necessity (like I have before).
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
I was "lucky" with a real bitchy and controlling ex. The bitchiness and control is designed to sap your attention. This was many years before I thought of websites like this. We were having sex regularly... But what kept us good was I was really passionate about my hobbies and interests outside the house! It was not intentional, but it was uncomfortable to be around her and her start nit-picking so I'd go work on cars or race them or go into the gym or stuff I really liked doing, it worked out well. I stayed outta her face for the most part of the day and we had sex every night even if it was just a 5-10 minutes quicky! Had I stayed in there tried to rationalize or "make her happy" I'd be screwed over majorly probably not having sex and it wouldn't have went smoothly.
PrettyBoyAJ
Master Don Juan
lol@ proportion. In other words you pay more then her for the bills.
Thats my worst fear, get into a ltr, move
.. see her too much, interest level tanks(id imagine its inevitable, right?)
Then I start screwing other girls, 'cause cola aint begging for sex ever.. and then stuck in an akward situation till lease is up
.. see her too much, interest level tanks(id imagine its inevitable, right?)
Then I start screwing other girls, 'cause cola aint begging for sex ever.. and then stuck in an akward situation till lease is up
So you dont think if you make more than your gf you should pay a little more? Just seems fair, i dunno maybe some left over bluepill ..
Like if you make 65k a year and she makes 35-40?
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
That's fine and makes the female feel kinda good. As long as she understands the arrangement means pvssy will be provided then he has in house pvssy that also helps pay bills and does things for him. It feels good.
BeTheChange
Master Don Juan
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Never had this problem. In fact in the 2 years I lived with my ex we had sex a lot more when we lived together and whenever I wanted it . Living together makes it difficult to fake it so if you are not a high value man you will get exposed. The only way you can really lose living with a woman is if you NEED her to pay the bills.If you are a man of high value then you have nothing to worry about.
My own personal philosophy, after my experience is that I would not consider moving in with a girl until at least 3 years of being exclusive.
PrettyBoyAJ
Master Don Juan
To be honest with you guys this happened to me last year.
I used to be engaged and live together with my babies mother. We had lived together for over a year and half. I had just signed a lease renewal when we broke up. When we broke up she packed her stuff and moved to a different state. I was stuck with a 4 bedroom house by myself. So I eventually just broke the lease and moved my stuff into my parents house. I traveled a lot for work anyway so I just make sure to stay working and on the road now so it's no problem for me.
The benefits of living together:
Always having someone at the house
She cooked majority of the meals
Having someone to clean the house
The cons of living together:
Nagged constantly about multiple different things
I'm a homebody and she always wanted to go out (Didn't mix well)
She quit her job and I paid all of her bills including hers.
Didn't have a social life outside of her
I used to be engaged and live together with my babies mother. We had lived together for over a year and half. I had just signed a lease renewal when we broke up. When we broke up she packed her stuff and moved to a different state. I was stuck with a 4 bedroom house by myself. So I eventually just broke the lease and moved my stuff into my parents house. I traveled a lot for work anyway so I just make sure to stay working and on the road now so it's no problem for me.
The benefits of living together:
Always having someone at the house
She cooked majority of the meals
Having someone to clean the house
The cons of living together:
Nagged constantly about multiple different things
I'm a homebody and she always wanted to go out (Didn't mix well)
She quit her job and I paid all of her bills including hers.
Didn't have a social life outside of her
PrettyBoyAJ
Master Don Juan
First, I'd never tell a women how much I make.
I got out of a relationship 9 months ago with my sons mother. I paid for everything for almost 2 years and after the relationship it seemed like she never appreciated it at all. Going forward I would just be more comfortable going half on a place if I ever move in with somebody. It's not my fault they couldn't get a good job like me. Now if I'm thinking about marrying her it would be a different story depending on if she is struggling or not.
Von
Master Don Juan
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Moving in with your girl in a LTR, is the next natural step.... for a lot of couple its the breaking points.
Advantage of living together = You are a team, you share everything, sex, pleasure, lonely moments etc...
Disadvantage of living together = You stop putting her a pedestal and she stop putting you there... Why? You know everything of each other, even the stuff who piss you off, the magic disappear with time.... oh you might also sleep less lol.
A relationship is work, time, commitment.
Living together put these 3 to the extreme.
Advantage of living together = You are a team, you share everything, sex, pleasure, lonely moments etc...
Disadvantage of living together = You stop putting her a pedestal and she stop putting you there... Why? You know everything of each other, even the stuff who piss you off, the magic disappear with time.... oh you might also sleep less lol.
A relationship is work, time, commitment.
Living together put these 3 to the extreme.
