What's your long term play with women?

[Colossus]

When I was single marriage was never really an objective, like it is for most people. I didnt fight it, but I wasnt seeking it either. Then when I met my now-wife, it made sense on a lot of levels and was something I wanted to do. Like Atom said, when the DJ is ready, his woman appears.

So for me, the "end goal" is really the journey. It's to live the best life I can with my wife. Life isnt all about me anymore, and that's a good thing.

As far as kids...I agree with speed dawg that on some level, most everyone desires children. I'm not a hard 'no', but having little kids is unappealing to me on many levels. I think my ideal of having children involves them being in their 20's and out of the house, lol.

In my line of work I see people in all stages of life---from infancy to the very, very old. This has given me perspective. Life never ends when most people think it will. We all think we'll live to be 95 and satisfied, but no one has any control over this. Not one ounce. Sure, you can live a healthy lifestyle. But I've seen plenty of healthy people get metastatic cancer, have heart attacks, or die in an accident. You just don't know. Most people die sick.

The "dying lonely" thing is another thing you have little control over. For the vast, vast majority of people, one spouse will pass before the other. There is also no guarantee your kids will take good care of you when you're old. Here in America we don't revere our elderly like other cultures---we view them as a burden. Old people get sick, they lose control, they need 24/7 care eventually. And being the busy Americans we are we outsource that, which is incredibly expensive. This leads to hard decisions.

I guess my point is that end of life is sad. Getting married or having kids to ensure you'll die comfy and surrounded by family is not really good decision-making. Do it for the journey, to live life for someone besides yourself, and have people around you when things get rough.

 

[guru1000]

Firstly, I regard you as one of the finest posters this board as ever had, so don't take this as criticism.

Your gf is in her 50s right? So in all honesty her "quality" behaviour is more out of the fact it is the only way for her to compete in the SMP as she can no longer offer youth and the same beauty and feminity she once could. She can't compete with pre-wall women and she knows it.

I'm all for celebrating positive female behaviour but let's not turn what's a necessity into a virtue.

While its true the more validation a woman receives, the less likely she has the need to be "quality" material; BUT from what I remember reading from Atom's previous posts, his woman is a widow arising out of a long LTR. Accordingly, she probably has not had a chance to become damaged goods like most women her age.

 

[glass half full]

Pump and dump, until I find a Unicorn or something close to one.

 

[Atom Smasher]

While its true the more validation a woman receives, the less likely she has the need to be "quality" material; BUT from what I remember reading from Atom's previous posts, his woman is a widow arising out of a long LTR. Accordingly, she probably has not had a chance to become damaged goods like most women her age.

This is precisely true.

Every day she demonstrates by her behavior/demeanor/speech how she has escaped that damage. She is also very strong in her faith, as am I, and that figures into compatibility in a huge way.

I've really come to believe (way before meeting her) that the quality women get scooped up in marriage early, and we are left with the dregs. I found this one online, fully expecting disappointment once I got to know her, but she is astoundingly free from the corruption of the modern western woman. She was a widow of I think 8 years when I met her, and she hasn't been on even a single date since then.

She's given me zero sh!t tests, while I have tested her thoroughly. It's a combination of two quality people who just have that chemistry of very similar values and who have eyes to see the best in each other. Rare but possible.

A quality woman doesn't need perfection in a man. She needs to see boldness, strength. leadership, ambition to be the best man you can be, protectiveness, some humility and kindness (within your strong frame), and the fact that you can and will walk away if necessary. Those qualities are all you need to play in the upper echelon.
All of that, I learned here at SoSuave, but I applied it.

 

[BeTheChange]

This sounds like BS but admittedly I am a millennial.

If she is indeed "strong in her faith" then this very well may be the case. My old man left my Mum when I was about 3. I don't remember ever seeing another man with her other than my step dad from around the age of 6/7 (maybe 8). They've now been married almost 20 years.

She's was/is deeply religious and traditional so even the idea of divorce (my Dad filed and was already living with another, younger women at the time) was shameful.

Finding a sincerely religious (old school) woman is probably the only major deterrent against the dissolution of a relationship. And by religious I'm not talking about all this do what you want Jesus will love you anyway hypocritical nonsense - chicks who subscribe to that mentality are often the biggest slvts going.

I couldn't deal with a religious girl due to my own beliefs but if I was a Christian, as I think you are, I'd think about focusing on that route a bit more.

My sister is still involved in the church and from what I hear there's a severe shortage of marriageable men.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I pretty much struck gold, because not only does she have a great character, but she is also stunning in looks. You know how once in a while you run into a woman who outwardly radiates that positive, friendly vibe? When the face defaults to a big, sincere smile? Everyone I know who has met her mentions what she radiates.

I'm also fortunate in that she's super-inquisitive and interested in my many hobbies and activities. That has always resulted in a big yawn from most of my previous girlfriends.

I know a few of you are rolling your eyes (brag post), but I couldn't care less what a bunch of guys on the interwebs think of my life. I only talk about her to encourage guys who think there are zero "quality" girls out there. It is true that there are very few, but those few are worth waiting for and worth becoming involved with once one crosses your path. The question is always, are YOU a man who would interest a girl like that? 8 years ago, I wasn't anywhere near that. What has changed? The application of the principles taught in this forum, plus dogged perseverance to better myself every day.

 

[Reyaj]

I think as you get older the more confirmed you become in your habits. I pretty much think of myself as a confirmed bachelor these days. I meet plenty of women, and enjoy their company. The realities are that the opportunities for ONS diminish a little with age. Of course, you can keep this lifestyle alive for a bit longer with some game, but I find the desire for that kind of relationship also diminishes with age, or maturity. I would have to meet quite a special woman for me to get involved, and so I leave it open-ended....

So I take it you don't have a desire to have children? Do you want a long term relationship with someone, or do you think every relationship has it's time span.

Pump and dump, until I find a Unicorn or something close to one.

Is is that easy?

For me, at my age, marriage is now on the agenda. I don't recommend it for younger guys (perhaps below 40) but there comes a time when you really want to think about spending the rest of your life with a decent gal if you are able to find one.

I'm coming up on a year with my lady and so far, zero sh!t tests. Not even a trace of one. She's gorgeous physically, and submissive yet intelligent. She cooperates fully with me and loves the fact that I lead. I know, I know... "Brag post". No, it's just meant to be an encouragement to guys that there are a few good ones out there and we should never give up hope.

I liken it to the well-known phrase... "When the student is ready, the teacher appears." In this case, when the DJ is ready, the decent woman appears. It's amazing how seriously higher quality women cross your path when you start to get your sh!t together. This is because these women are invisible to you, and you to them, when you're underdeveloped as a man. It's like phantoms who are not able to perceive each other. Quality women look past a so-so man as if he were a lamp post. He doesn't even register. And from his perspective, she is lumped in with all the other "stuck-up" women he sees.

Hopefully there's some value in this post. I only mean it to be an encouragement. The number of quality women out there is ridiculously low, but we must realize that they will start to notice us, and us them, when we continue to integrate the principles taught on this forum into our inner cores.

I think if you don't want children, getting married or having a partner later in life is perfectly fine. But what goals do you strive for now that you are in the late phase of your life? I am just curious cause all I think about right now is mainly pvssy.

When I was single marriage was never really an objective, like it is for most people. I didnt fight it, but I wasnt seeking it either. Then when I met my now-wife, it made sense on a lot of levels and was something I wanted to do. Like Atom said, when the DJ is ready, his woman appears.

So for me, the "end goal" is really the journey. It's to live the best life I can with my wife. Life isnt all about me anymore, and that's a good thing.

As far as kids...I agree with speed dawg that on some level, most everyone desires children. I'm not a hard 'no', but having little kids is unappealing to me on many levels. I think my ideal of having children involves them being in their 20's and out of the house, lol.

In my line of work I see people in all stages of life---from infancy to the very, very old. This has given me perspective. Life never ends when most people think it will. We all think we'll live to be 95 and satisfied, but no one has any control over this. Not one ounce. Sure, you can live a healthy lifestyle. But I've seen plenty of healthy people get metastatic cancer, have heart attacks, or die in an accident. You just don't know. Most people die sick.

The "dying lonely" thing is another thing you have little control over. For the vast, vast majority of people, one spouse will pass before the other. There is also no guarantee your kids will take good care of you when you're old. Here in America we don't revere our elderly like other cultures---we view them as a burden. Old people get sick, they lose control, they need 24/7 care eventually. And being the busy Americans we are we outsource that, which is incredibly expensive. This leads to hard decisions.

I guess my point is that end of life is sad. Getting married or having kids to ensure you'll die comfy and surrounded by family is not really good decision-making. Do it for the journey, to live life for someone besides yourself, and have people around you when things get rough.

I agree Colossus but I feel like your last line in that post kind of contradicts what you said above "and have people around you when things get rough" Only cause before that you say that isn't guaranteed. But anyway you make great points and I think the most salient one is that we can't guarantee our futures... but we can take calculated risks if we do want to settle down and start a family.

See I feel the same as you do about children... I don't know if I'm ready to dedicate my life to raising someone else... I like my life how it is now and I've seen how someone's life is when they have kids. Then we do have the posters with children that say it's worth it once you have them and you get more satisfaction out of giving your life to others than living it just for yourself.

But what is life like when you get older and you don't have a family? I guess traveling a lot alone or with your partner, focusing just on your career? If that will give someone satisfaction more power to them... but personally I think I might look back with regret if I didn't reproduce.

I pretty much struck gold, because not only does she have a great character, but she is also stunning in looks. You know how once in a while you run into a woman who outwardly radiates that positive, friendly vibe? When the face defaults to a big, sincere smile? Everyone I know who has met her mentions what she radiates.

I'm also fortunate in that she's super-inquisitive and interested in my many hobbies and activities. That has always resulted in a big yawn from most of my previous girlfriends.

I know a few of you are rolling your eyes (brag post), but I couldn't care less what a bunch of guys on the interwebs think of my life. I only talk about her to encourage guys who think there are zero "quality" girls out there. It is true that there are very few, but those few are worth waiting for and worth becoming involved with once one crosses your path. The question is always, are YOU a man who would interest a girl like that? 8 years ago, I wasn't anywhere near that. What has changed? The application of the principles taught in this forum, plus dogged perseverance to better myself every day.

Kudos Atom, I am happy for you. I think the age demographics as mentioned by a poster above may be what's not comparable to other's situations, but I agree you did find a good one for yours.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

So I take it you don't have a desire to have children? Do you want a long term relationship with someone...
.

Yes, but only if it is the right person. If not, I am happy to stay single and write my poetry.

do you think every relationship has it's time span

No, I think the ideal is to find a good woman and hang onto her. The sad thing is that even though most DJ see the truth of this, they are also so realistically minded that they may be developing habits which make it difficult to realize that ideal in their life.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

She's was/is deeply religious and traditional so even the idea of divorce (my Dad filed and was already living with another, younger women at the time) was shameful.

Finding a sincerely religious (old school) woman is probably the only major deterrent against the dissolution of a relationship. And by religious I'm not talking about all this do what you want Jesus will love you anyway hypocritical nonsense - chicks who subscribe to that mentality are often the biggest slvts going.

I couldn't deal with a religious girl due to my own beliefs but if I was a Christian, as I think you are, I'd think about focusing on that route a bit more.

My sister is still involved in the church and from what I hear there's a severe shortage of marriageable men.

Religion and marriage go together like a horse and carriage.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Yes absolutely - and I am trying - I just keep getting seduced by pagan women heh.

Btw, its harder for good looking women to maintain their faith due to pride and temptations. Not a single one of the top 10% looking women Christian women I grew up with is still a Christian(although they do seem to stick to their boyfriends like glue once they find one - they are also very picky). Even if they do, they tend to not have the most intellectually curious personalities, which is hard for me to give up right now.

Regardless, if I do meet such a woman, I am in prime position to win her.

Go for the 'all-rounder' with pretty good looks, pretty good intelligence and pretty good personality. What they lack in the bling look, they make up for in spades in personality and intelligence. Looks wear thin after a bit.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Firstly, I regard you as one of the finest posters this board as ever had, so don't take this as criticism.

Your gf is in her 50s right? So in all honesty her "quality" behaviour is more out of the fact it is the only way for her to compete in the SMP as she can no longer offer youth and the same beauty and feminity she once could. She can't compete with pre-wall women and she knows it.

I'm all for celebrating positive female behaviour but let's not turn what's a necessity into a virtue.

No offense taken.

Your assumptions are not correct. Her quality behavior comes from within her core, not from an adjustment due to advancing in age. When you get to be my age, you can easily discern that. She and I both are ridiculously youthful, which is a great thing. We both look like we're in our mid to late thirties.

 

[glass half full]

Many women as they get older know that it's time to quit being a pain in the ass and get real, IMHO. Some don't, like the one I mentioned here a couple of years ago. But I was outside her circle, so that's a non-issue. Some will play it all the way.

I've noticed that even younger women in public have more respect for older men. Yes this could be a monetary thing, but as the woman gets older this isn't so much, because likely she has her own nest egg. Even if it did come from a previous man, or three. But by then some women become reasonable and respecting. But you still have to screen them well. Looks like Smasher has done well for himself, and I am respectful of that, it says a lot about him.

 

[FwoGiZ]

I didn't read all of the comments yet but thought I'd put my input. I am 31yo btw.
Right now, am quite happy with this fabulous gf I've had for almost 3 years. Before her, I was a serial monogamist but now I am in open LTR with her. I do not expect this relationship to last forever but I kinda hope it does. I do not plan on moving a girl in my place anytime soon when/if we're done. I will NEVER get married, will never have kids (snipped) and am not worried of being all alone as long as I have my dog I have never shared finances or anything much with a women and never will. I am extremely independent but at the same time, I highly depend on pvssy and just love having a women in my bed. Kinda tricky managing both of those things since they contradict. Right now, the plan is to keep dating 20-25yo chicks as long as I can, hopefully up to my 50s. I will do everything in my power to stay very fit in my late 30s 40s. After this, it's a bit far for me to really know what I'll be doing but so far, I will have a really good pension when I am 51yo and have lotso different business plans at that point. I will also be moving out of the country (Canada) first chance I get because I don't feel like I belong here anymore. Feminisation and now Islamisation is just way too much for me to accept.
My own happiness will always prime and is what governs my life. I do not like the idea of conventional marriage/joint account etc because it just feels like that now my happiness would 50% depend on someone I have no control over and who runs a business like that? with a women....... constantly changing their mind, trying to quench their thirst of hypergamy? **** it

 

[SgtSplacker]

I'd have a kid if I can find a woman that's not completely delusional and full of shiit. I'd marry a woman like that too. Right now I'm just focusing on getting my diick wet and listening to the least amount of biitching and whining I can.

 

[Reyaj]

I'd have a kid if I can find a woman that's not completely delusional and full of shiit. I'd marry a woman like that too. Right now I'm just focusing on getting my diick wet and listening to the least amount of biitching and whining I can.

I found this but I love the chase of new pvssy so much... what do I do?

 

[Skeptic Templar]

That "You will die alone" scare tactic is such a common shaming strategy by most women hitting the wall. I also hear it from male buddies of mine who claim to have a 'good game' with women. I'll always have the same sarcastic albeit logical reply, 'Well, unless you are clairvoyant, how the hell would you know how you're gonna die?"