Whats the freakin point in PUA ?

[bigblock7]

The last years I have gradually escaped my social anxiety problems and have become more confident and outgoing. After reading some pickup artist books , web blogs , going on sosuave and experiencing real life interaction I seem to sometimes get influenced too much by what I have read and heard about picking up women that It interferes with my own world-view and how I'd normally react to a situation. I mean I keep hearing all these pickup strategies : be mysterious , keep her guessing , make sure to wait at least 10mins before msging her , don't reveal to much about yourself , don't compliment her , neg her...etc.
Alot of the CRAP that PUA come out with is bullsh1t and trying to act a certain way which interferes with ones innate behavioral characteristics is futile and can only be faked for so long.

It just seems everything has been overcomplicated. I mean cant I just be a more stronger/ confident version of myself without having to adhere to the never ending do's and dont's of the pua community.

I mean why when I meet a girl do I have to be mysterious,funny or ****y? Why do I also have to remember to have a few one-liners ready to go? Or a neg to destroy her b1tch-shield and put her back down to reality? I mean maybe these ways of approaching women have there place...but for fcuk sake if your confident , happy with yourself , love socializing with people you will attract women.

I'm over crossexamining every fckuing interaction I have with a girl. Asking myself ' you dikhed maybe you should have negged her ' or ' next time I should have been more mysterious and not told her what I do for a living '. I mean wtf this is really doing my head in.

 

[TheException]

Overall the PUA community(which sosuave is not a member of) is a bunch of tactics and lines to mask deep insecurities and allow the man to display attractive qualities to a woman. Sure some guys might get laid...but eventually it all collapses like a house of cards and they can never keep a girlfriend. Not too mention its a bunch of guys selling things and marketing themselves....the best advice you find on the internet for free.

That being said(and agree with you to a point), I have to address some of your points.

The last years I have gradually escaped my social anxiety problems and have become more confident and outgoing.

Positive^ You think you would have overcome this if you never sought help and advice?

I mean I keep hearing all these pickup strategies : be mysterious , keep her guessing , make sure to wait at least 10mins before msging her , don't reveal to much about yourself , don't compliment her , neg her...etc.

Your focusing toooo much on the tactics. Im more of a "mindset guy". I teach/advocate for a specific alpha male mindset and all the other sh1t sort of flows naturally. I was into the PUA scene in high school and its retarded. Way too much sh1t to analyze and you get stuck in your head....however if you are taught what to look for and your mindset is alpha, you no longer process that information with the conscious mind....it becomes subconscious. So at first its beneficial to recognize an "IOI" but eventually you wont have to "look out" for them.

trying to act a certain way which interferes with ones innate behavioral characteristics is futile and can only be faked for so long.

By innate...you most likely mean beta as fvck. Society has warped men into these husks of REAL MEN. When you come for advice or knowledge from places like sosuave you become "awakened". You see things differently. The things i teach/advocate for most likely go against whats been programmed into you by society. Ever hear of "fake it til you make it"? Thats how i got to where Im at. You keep doing certain things and eventually your mind picks them up and everything becomes natural.

I mean why when I meet a girl do I have to be mysterious,funny or ****y? Why do I also have to remember to have a few one-liners ready to go? Or a neg to destroy her b1tch-shield and put her back down to reality?

Because its successful/attractive. You didnt come here to become better at sucking with women did you? Again...this is seen through your old mind where everything is getting analyzed. Read more things on mindset and "Prize mentality".

happy with yourself , love socializing with people you will attract women.

*happy with yourself , love socializing with people you will get friendzoned by women.

Id say read more inner game/mentality stuff. Your probably reading a lot of tactical sh1t, which most guys do because they think it will yield results the best....it doesnt. PM if you want articles or examples of what I mean when I say "Mentality".

 

[Greasy Pig]

PUA tactics have been proven countless times in the field, so I wouldn't be too hasty in discounting them altogether.
I've used them to amazing effect but I've also been guilty of "over gaming" a lot of chicks and screwing things up.
I think a true DJ uses an arsenal of different theories: a little bit of PUA; a little bit of C&F; a little bit of negging; a little bit of hamster baiting etc etc.

It's taken me years of experimenting to come up with the ability to implement different techniques for different situations and different women.
Hang in there OP and find a level that you're comfortable with and which brings you the most success.
It can be a mindfvck at times, but more study, more practice and more experimenting will pay off.

 

[bigblock7]

Hi. I agree with most of what you guys are saying. I think its the whole mentality thing. I'v been ' diagnosed ' with OCD , anxiety disorders , BDD and clinical depression by multiple shrinks. ANYWAY after years of all this sh1t interfering with my life I'm finally taking a step forward and sosuave has definitely helped me and somewhat opened my eyes. Having said that I'v hit a bump in the road , and without me fixing my inner self-worth and overall outlook , these PUA techniques are just band-aid fixes which are not going to fix the ROOT of my problem ( which is , I guess my ' mentality ' ). I already know if I'm able to fix my outlook/mentality it will have favorable effects in lifting my mood and feeling better about myself , and of course getting women.

 

[Tomthebomb]

PUA as taught by mystery et al is a crock of sh1t, or at least it's only a means to an end. Real game is not abou.t memorising lines, or rules, or planning out different locations etc. real game is about being the best version of yourself, and taking what you want. Real game is self development. It's about not giving a f.u.c.k what anybody else thinks of you - but rather having a strong and unbreakable sence of self - an inner confidence that is independent of the reactions of others.

forget about the PUA crap, just bring your women into your world, into your frame, and be a man with a big set of balls with masculine values.

 

[Epimanes]

Who cares about all the rules and tactics here. Take from here what makes YOU a better person and incorporate that into yourself. Everyone will have a different outlook on their perspective women. Maybe some stuff here doesn't work on the women your attracted to so find what compliments you and go with it. Rules are meant to be broken so with your time here focus on the rules that need to be bent to your satisfaction and that fit your character and frame. Stop supplicating to what the community thinks you should do and just use this place to fill in the gaps and strengthen your personality and overall masculine frame.

 

[bigblock7]

PUA as taught by mystery et al is a crock of sh1t, or at least it's only a means to an end. Real game is not abou.t memorising lines, or rules, or planning out different locations etc. real game is about being the best version of yourself, and taking what you want. Real game is self development. It's about not giving a f.u.c.k what anybody else thinks of you - but rather having a strong and unbreakable sence of self - an inner confidence that is independent of the reactions of others.

forget about the PUA crap, just bring your women into your world, into your frame, and be a man with a big set of balls with masculine values.

Mate I completely agree , I think that's spot on. Thankyou