Whats the deal with chicks that have a bunch of male friends

[xHiGHPoTeniaL]

So met this chick about a month ago n these red flags keep popping up. Its mainly been related to the fact that she has all these dude friends. One especially who I came close to slappin in the face cuz I could tell he was hating on me to her from across the party. Wasn't sure how to handle it but I did let her kno that was some shady ass shyt.

Anyway during that I told her it was funny how she has all these dude friends that would **** her in a sec if they ever had a chance and her response was simply, well no I dont like them like that.

Lol, i found this funny and was just wondering whats the deal with chicks like these? Its like in an act of rebellion they get all tomboyish and try to act tuff. I'm really not the jealous type and would like to continue to have sex with this chick but its obvious she has serious issues that would make me unable to label her my girl, besides when shes with me. I'm just wondering how to handle when I'm with her and I hafta see one of these douches. And also just generalizations from the more experienced guys on here about chicks like these would be cool. Are they all no good for wifeys?

 

[Juicyjays]

I lived in an oil rigging city in Northern Alberta for 5 years, where there were way more men than women. Every other city I worked in (I work in the cooking industry, so I am exposed to countless amounts of gorgeous waitresses/hostesses/managers bla bla), I found more of the ladies had girlfriends than guy friends.

In this place on the other hand, it was all females with countless amounts of guy friends. When I would ask them why they have so many guy friends every single female told me that they think most girls are *****es. It was weird and I don't even want to go into the psychological aspect of that.

I honestly had no problems. I was having plenty of sex with women up there, but I seen so many males hanging over these women that I almost felt sorry for them. They would be rude to me too, trying to make me emotional. The reason behind the women with guy friends in my opinion is because they love the attention, absoutely love it. It raises their confidence and ego. Wouldn't you if you had 10 girls hanging over you trying to have sex with you?

You gotta remember, you're already one step ahead because you're with her.

So in my opinion; you need to be more positive. Think of this way. She's screwing you and not her guy friends. Yes, 99% of these guys want to have sex with her too but guess what? They're not. You are.

Next time you see one of her guy friends, immediatly have that mindset. It'll show through your body language and your voice. You're winning and they're on the complete opposite end of the stick. If you let your emotions show and get pissed at one of these guys, you will crash and burn. Your woman will notice it and want you even more, maybe even to the point of where she stops talking as much to the guy friends she has (this has worked for me with a chick i dated for almost a year who had a lot of guy friends).

Good luck.

 

[WC2]

Two things.

First of all, learn that patience is a good thing; especially when it comes to women. It seems to me like you're too focused on the future and not enjoying the present enough.

If she is/was a huge *** dumpster then you will see the signs sooner or later. I know you want to 'get to the bottom' of this, but my advice would be to continue having sex with her when you want it, and play it by ear.

Second, your gut is probably right. I can't say that all girls with lots of guy friends are wh0res. Yes, a lot of them are. But it doesn't mean they all are. It shouldn't take you long to hear/see whether it's true or not.

In the mean time, who cares? You're just banging her right?

This is why it's always good to have options. You don't have to 'hope' that your one chick doesn't turn out to be rotten, because you have others you can goto if need be.

 

[Cinamon]

Why do some girls have a lot of guy mates? For me its because from a very young age i've always had more boys around than girls. The neighbourhood i grew up in and kids i played with, there were 2 third boys and a third girls. When you hang out with the boys to have a laugh, you dont have to worry about being PC, you can proper rip it out of each other and it keeps you grounded. With girls, we are *****es, you never know who you can trust, jealousy and envy can easily lead to sabotage on so many levels, whereas girls dont get that from guys.

I dont think all of a womens guy mates are trying to get with her. I have 5 close guy mates i am in regular contact with and out of these there were only two that I could tell probably wanted more, so i hooked them up with a couple of my girl mates and they are both in LTR's and still good friends. I think its cruel to keep guys lingering on if you have no intention of dating them or giving them what they want.

 

[jnice48146]

IMO, its like one the previous posters said; attention. These girls may or may not be wh0res in the traditional sense, but they ARE attention wh0res! They are the girls that take 3000 pics (of themselves!) a night at the bar, know EVERY guy in the three nearest states, and have an 4/1 guy to girl ratio on their Facebook friendlist.

I dated one of these girls for about 9 months, which was about 5 too many. Shyt got bad between us after some of her guy friends, many of whom I had met and was really cool with (I started hanging with a few of them, IT DROVE HER NUTS!), stopped flirting with her. I'm assuming they did it out of respect for me, since she and I were exclusive. Once she figured out that I was the reason she wasn't getting her attention fix, she started acting badly, and that was the end of that.

 

[Kailex]

I dont think all of a womens guy mates are trying to get with her.

God, I HATE it when a woman says this.
It's such a load of B.S.

Every single "guy friend" is a potential lay waiting to happen.\
Women have a lot of male friends for various reasons:

(1) Women can't stand each other. It's just the way it is. They act cordial, but secretly, every woman is truly hating on each other, silently criticizing the other. They vary seldomly trust each other.

(2) Because they don't have to worry about men betraying them, backstabbing them, stealing their man, etc...

(3) Because they love having an army of orbiters.

(4) Because they know that all they have to do is ASK and they can get free sex.


Cinamon, I'm sorry, but at any moments notice, any ONE of your guy friends would probably hit that if you just asked them. That's just the way it is, no exceptions... unless you are hideous, grossly overweight and generally unattractive... there is no such thing as "uninterested guy friends".

That's why, we should avoid women with lots of male friends.
Most of those male friends are AFC's plotting against you. You can either join them, beat them or just find someone new altogether that doesn't have all these red flags.

I'd rather get into a canoe and paddle through calm waters than try to paddle upstream.

 

[synergy1]

thats what I saw with my last gf who was friends with mostly guys. After we parted ways, she had many of them try and make moves for lays. Some still are. It must be so much easier for chicks to swing branches since options just seem to line themselves up for women who are average looking.

 

[xHiGHPoTeniaL]

Thnx for sum really good responses fellas. That other post up top right now about the waiter hitting on someones date was also very helpful and related alot to this situation. It seems that her reaction to the attention is the most important aspect and that seems most disturbing to me in how she seems to enjoy it and doesnt discourage it. The fact that she enjoys it has made me become flirty with all her female friends, and to my suprize they've enjoyed that as well. Plus her refusal to curb this behavior after i said something that time really drives it home. Its like her twisted way of asserting herself or sum shyt that she keeps hanging out with them (they play softball and other pickup games at least once a week which ill go to sometimes).

I realize i rly need to start enjoying the ride more because the sex is great and suposedly i'm the first to ever make her *** (only orally so far tho any tips? lol). At sum point tho if i feel i'm really bein disrecpect by one of these "orbiters" there will be a problem, but I guess i could just smooth it over by subtlely reminding them i'm ****in her and they, cept for maybe this one dude, have zero chance at that ever.

the main thing that made me bring it up is because the last 2 times i was with her and she got all drunk she was asking me boyfriend q's and how come i havent asked her yet bla bla blah, when i'm thinkin woww, i cant even trust u when i'm at the same party stupid.

Kailex, these AFC's are most def. plotting on me which makes me laugh but also does kinda piss me off. Whats my next move here or the end game to all this? just try to enjoy the ride and not get attached i guess? Get more plates to spin wouldnt hurt too i guess?
(i'm also in a ****ty spot too in that i havent gotten a new car yet still and she always comes and scoops me no prob. so wrong i kno lol but my friends can't always pick me up cuz i live so outta the way)

 

[xHiGHPoTeniaL]

I also wanted to mention how this situation reminds me of Chris Rock's stand up in which he refered to female's male friends and being like glass diks in a jar, break open in case of an emergency! lol

 

[handle]

Just handle your own business and don't worry about these guys. I have a female friend (yes just a friend, I don't find her attractive at all but for some reason lots of guys do) who has loads of guy buddies. _Mostly_ guy buddies. And she sometimes has casual sex with about half of them. But when she meets a guy she really likes, she enters a 100% committed relationship with the guy (or if he isn't feeling that, they just fvck a lot and she gets her feelings hurt at the end.) Threw me off for the first week I knew her... But that was about it.

It's been very enlightening knowing this girl. I've never been that interested in one of these girls with ****loads of guy friends, so maybe I don't fully understand the jealousy/"what-the-fvck-is-up" that you're feeling. But I do know that, as with most issues in dating, if you just have a backbone and stay cool, it should be fine. No need to be overly suspicious, but if something weird happen then of course just dump her and move on.

As for the oral only thing... All I can say is different angles. Good luck.

 

[terran2k]

I know a chic with alot of guy friends, they all want her. She uses them to help her move and ****. I dated her for a while, she used them to play mind games with me. Im over it now.

 

[Paintballguy]

two words: Attention *****

They feed off all of their guy "friends" that shower her with attention. We all know that the guys just want to fvck said girl, but they are all AFC's. IMO, girls like that are just a waste of time.

 

[War Against Betaism]

I've met sooooooooooo many women that are like this. Their bestfriend is a dude that is friending her in the hopes that one day she'll fvck him, all their friends are dudes, and their justification for it is "guy friends are less drama." No sh1t they're less drama, they'll follow the girl around like a puppy not contesting anything she will say because he's afraid she'll think badly of him. It'll be plenty of drama though when the day comes after 5 years of friendship he still hasn't gotten a clue and he ends up raping her.

From my experience I've learned to stay away from girls like this because when girls have lots of guy friends, they expect their boyfriend to act like that too; sucking up all the time expecting you to buy them everything. At first it may not seem like it, but after a week or month or so she'll be throwing b1tch fits.

 

[Lexington]

You say you're not the jealous type, but surely you must have come off that way by asking her why she has so many guy friends. Simply put, any attractive girl is going to have lots of guy "friends." You're right, most of these guys would fvck her in a heartbeat if they had the chance, but what would you expect?

She's got a whole bunch of dudes who are probably falling over themselves trying to kiss her ass. Any time she needs a ride, or some help with something around the house, she'll have an army of dudes who will not only do this for her, but be delighted to do it! Why wouldn't she want to have all these guy friends?

 

[CuriousGirl]

There are different psychological theories, sure, but personally I like hanging around with guys simply because they're much funnier than girls. It may sound sexist but... it's true, you have to admitt. I've noticed when I'm with just the girls I'm the one making them laugh but when I'm with just guys I'll tend to be listening and laughing.
I couldn't just hang around girls all the time, but in the same breath I couldn't just hang around guys all the time. Both are cool, girls are awesome in their own ways and boys are awesome in their own ways.

 

[nismo-4]

Kailex, Lexington, and paintballguy FTW!

Women can have a guy at the drop of a hat and they can have sex with any of these male friends by simply saying the word. Often times, they have the choosing power and get mad when you don't bow down to her.

I always knew pu$$y had a high market value. And it only gets higher. With guys wanting to date women, dinner dates (Most are at the guys expense btw), movie dates, and all that other typical crap that guys do makes it that way.

 

[EA Gold]

I wonder who's going to marry these B#tches...lol


If any of you are involved, please pray for them

 

[War Against Betaism]

There are different psychological theories, sure, but personally I like hanging around with guys simply because they're much funnier than girls. It may sound sexist but... it's true, you have to admitt. I've noticed when I'm with just the girls I'm the one making them laugh but when I'm with just guys I'll tend to be listening and laughing.
I couldn't just hang around girls all the time, but in the same breath I couldn't just hang around guys all the time. Both are cool, girls are awesome in their own ways and boys are awesome in their own ways.

Heh, true, girls really aren't funny. There's some exceptions, I have two girl friends that I'm really close with, but they have this certain girlish humour to them they always make me laugh.

 

[AmIAFC]

These women are not worth the time, at least not worth an exclusivity arrangement. Women and Betas would have us believe that any issue we might have with these women is the result of self-esteem deficiency or some sense of inadequacy, redirecting the problem towards us. Those other men might not be a threat to me, but neither is a cigarette if a woman chooses to smoke, but that doesn't mean I have to find it acceptable.

My last GF was a tomboy, with a bunch of male friends, and similarly to others I had dated with that same condition, she suffered from a ravenous need for multi-person attention and gratification, all of which hinted at an awkward childhood and imbalanced upbringing.

I prefer to have a lady that was raised and developed in a more traditional environment. Pretty much like my mother who was never surrounded by 30 guy friends but kept a small social circle of females. That's natural. Watch any animal show and see if it's acceptable to the alpha male to see the alpha female of the group mingling with the betas of the pack/pride. But it's okay for us to permit it, because otherwise, we get labeled as insecure by these same twisted females.

The fact that they need these guy friends for attention or to use them in some other non-sexual capacity speaks volumes about their character and quality as a "friend." All the guys/girls I hang with I genuinely like and respect. I don't need or use them to feed my ego or for attention.

**** these women. Find a girl with a traditional set of friends.

 

[iqqi]

It's easier to make friends with guys than girls. I know the first assumption is that it's because a guy wants you, but there are simpler reasons, too. For one, it is much more socially acceptable to approach someone of the opposite sex whom you don't know.

Since being in a new city for a year now, I've found it nearly impossible to make new girlfriends. They are also catty, insecure, and flaky. My best success has been with a few guy friends that I have met, who have proven to be good buddies despite my unavailability in "that way".

I guess what they like about me is my adventurousness, getting them to go to places they might not know about and do things not on their radar, not to mention I am a bit of a riot when I am not down right moody and quiet. Plus I do have a few female acquaintances with whom my guy friends may have gotten a makeout session or two from...

The reason I love my male friends is that there is no cattiness, no insecurity, no flakiness, no female bashing as a means to bonding, and they are almost always down to go wherever and try new things. It is easier to forge a connection, without having to get through layers of insecurity and b!tch issues. Not to mention they keep the piranhas (other men looking for a hookup) at bay.