What's do you think is my right move in this situation

[crowolf]

Ok, check this out:

I am in my mid 20s. Healthy, extremely motivated and energetic. I got stuff going on, I am pursuing my goals. I am very confident, etc...

But the thing is: I get no s3x rn. And I don't f4p either. And my testosterone levels are either at the top chart or even higher than that. I actually did a test about a month ago, and they were peaking. Not a big surprise for me. And it explains a lot about my unlimited amounts of mental (and physical) energy.

So I kind of have 2 paths in front of me.

- Either I push hard on cold approaching and finding a way to get laid. (But the bad thing about this is that now I am kind of "thirsty", and it may show as eagerness and turn them off. But on the other side, this instinctive hunger can be a good aphrodisiac to women, in certain settings - live interactions mostly. Also I don't like the attachment aspect of this chase, and it surely ruins my mental health. But also when I set a goal, I strive to achieve it. And now one of my goals is to start getting laid again.).

Women sense my high levels of testosterone, and feel something towards it. The bad thing is that guys sense that too and recently I often catch them staring at me or testing me (rarely but it happens in small ways).

- Option 2 is to go fully dedicated on my goals and purpose, and forget about women. Until I fix my finances or elevate my SMV even more. Or maybe not forget at all about women but simply stop putting any effort to chase them. Except maybe on special occasions in life where it would just be too dumb not to act on the opportunity.

What would you do in my position?

 

[Oatmeal31]

Ok, check this out:

I am in my mid 20s. Healthy, extremely motivated and energetic. I got stuff going on, I am pursuing my goals. I am very confident, etc...

But the thing is: I get no s3x rn. And I don't f4p either. And my testosterone levels are either at the top chart or even higher than that. I actually did a test about a month ago, and they were peaking. Not a big surprise for me. And it explains a lot about my unlimited amounts of mental (and physical) energy.

So I kind of have 2 paths in front of me.

- Either I push hard on cold approaching and finding a way to get laid. (But the bad thing about this is that now I am kind of "thirsty", and it may show as eagerness and turn them off. But on the other side, this instinctive hunger can be a good aphrodisiac to women, in certain settings - live interactions mostly. Also I don't like the attachment aspect of this chase, and it surely ruins my mental health. But also when I set a goal, I strive to achieve it. And now one of my goals is to start getting laid again.).

Women sense my high levels of testosterone, and feel something towards it. The bad thing is that guys sense that too and recently I often catch them staring at me or testing me (rarely but it happens in small ways).

- Option 2 is to go fully dedicated on my goals and purpose, and forget about women. Until I fix my finances or elevate my SMV even more. Or maybe not forget at all about women but simply stop putting any effort to chase them. Except maybe on special occasions in life where it would just be too dumb not to act on the opportunity.

What would you do in my position?

Why not do both? In my experience, solely focusing on cold approaching is a recipe for disaster. It's a fairly low percentage activity that can consume your mental state if it's the only egg you have in the basket. It's probably best as something a bit more supplemental. Maybe you can just dedicate 2-3 days a week to it for a couple hours at a time. Hobbies on the side to maintain your confidence, since cold approaching can erode your confidence on bad days.

Just my 2 cents. I'm sure most guys have gotten laid more than me on this site, but I can at least say I've approached a few hundred by now

 

[crowolf]

That's what I'm trying to do, but I guess it just doesn't work that way for me. I am the type of person to get fully obsessed and absorbed by one thing. So I got to choose 1 path...

You are right about cold approaching - the ROI % seems really low. I love going out and meeting women but this requires some dedication in order for it to work out.

You know what they say - chase 2 rabbits, catch none.

 

[Oatmeal31]

That's what I'm trying to do, but I guess it just doesn't work that way for me. I am the type of person to get fully obsessed and absorbed by one thing. So I got to choose 1 path...

You are right about cold approaching - the ROI % seems really low. I love going out and meeting women but this requires some dedication in order for it to work out.

You know what they say - chase 2 rabbits, catch none.

Be careful about focusing very strongly on cold approaches. Personally, when I go through a string of rejections it tends to have an impact on my confidence, happiness, and mental state. I call it going on tilt, like gamblers do, and when that happens and you keep chasing the dragon, it can make things even worse. If you feel off due to some unpleasant rejections, it can very well influence the way you come across in later interactions and just feed the cycle.

Very possible to have days like that. So, pick your poison if you're going with one option. I don't care how many stoic quotes and how much generic advice there is out there on dealing with rejections, it will affect you at some point.

We're two different people though. If you have a strong social life outside of pickup and find value in hobbies and what not, it'll probably affect you less. Again, just my 2 cents

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

Social encounters are not algebra. Read that again.

You will make yourself miserable and frustrated (and you will have a weird, creepy unnatural vibe if you focus on gaming women with the type of intensity you describe.) It will repel women, and it will make you angry. Not productive.

Quit thinking in such a binary way. Life is not binary. It is nuanced. Full of fuzziness and grey areas. Life is messy. Embrace the imperfections in people and in life (and in yourself too.)

Focus on improving yourself. However, at the same time, learn to observe your surroundings at all times. Leave the house. If you are walking down the block and a cute girl is walking her dog? Say hello. If you get a coffee and the girl at the counter is cute? Say hello. If you are at work and come across a cute girl, say hello. Gain some experience. Search the 100 approach thread on here by @narcissist. His social competency increased dramatically just by talking to women each day. It's a skillset, yes, but it is fuzzy and inexact.

Right now your focused on "OMG my testosterone is high and I'm not getting laid!!!" Your focus is on YOU. This ME ME ME focus is what creates a weird vibe.

Newsflash. Nobody cares about you. (I tell my own Gen Z kids this - so don't feel picked on).

You need to learn to integrate better into the world around you and cultivate a genuine curiosity about other people. If that feels uncomfortable to you? You need to make this adjustment like, yesterday.

The Robert Green books 48 Laws of Power and Art of Seduction are good reads to help you understand better what I am talking about.

Once you are more open with people and learn to start conversations (at least say Hi) things will go forward from there.

So I disagree with the choices you propose for yourself, OP. Widen your mind to include less well defined options. When you do this the self improvement path becomes self evident, with social development, human interaction, and approaching women baked in and incorporated.

My $0.002.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

I am in my mid 20s. Healthy, extremely motivated and energetic. I got stuff going on, I am pursuing my goals. I am very confident, etc...

That's what I'm trying to do, but I guess it just doesn't work that way for me. I am the type of person to get fully obsessed and absorbed by one thing.

At first glance your problem OP is you need to learn to chill. You may be too intense for a lot of these chicks

 

[zekko]

That's what I'm trying to do, but I guess it just doesn't work that way for me. I am the type of person to get fully obsessed and absorbed by one thing. So I got to choose 1 path...

If you can only do one thing, I would focus on your goals, that's more important. I would still go out and socialize, but maybe not pressure yourself so much with women. Go out, blow off some steam, have fun, but keep your eyes open for opportunities. Stay alert, because they often present themselves when you least expect it.

 

[SW15]

Keep going with your no porn and no masturbation practice. Lift weights and do other fitness activities. This will help with your seduction goals. Approach a lot of women.