What went wrong with the Brazilian girl?

[Ilboy]

Hi everybody!

I had a rather not so successful experience the other day and would need some advice on a) what I did wrong and b) what to do next.
I'd be glad for any help!

So here's what happened:
Wednesday last week (28 December) I went with a few friends to a bar. As I was kind of on and off with my girlfriend and not sure where we were going, I wasn't looking for pick-up. I was having a good time with my friends, when I was approached by this Brazilian girl.
She was here only for another two weeks and we had a phenomenal conversation. She asked me what I was doing for New Years and I said I was going to party with friends and asked her if she wanted to come. She said yes with a big smile. She gave me her eMail, Skype and Facebook even though I just asked for the Facebook.
Fast forward friday. I ask her if she is really coming for New Years. She is like "No I can't, you have a girlfriend and I think that's not right" (damn you facebook!), so it takes me a little convincing. I say something like "C'mon, I am a big boy, I can hang out with other girls" She says ok she will come.
Saturday she is like "Sorry I can't come, I need to hang out with my friends from Brazil and celebrate with them" WTF...so I try to convince her a little but as she seems to get annoyed I am like "Alright, give me a call if you wanna grap a drink" She immediately asks if I wanna do something on Tuesday (yesterday) and I say yes, but she has to plan it.
It is Tuesday and haven't heard anything from her. So the initial conversation goes like this:
Me: "What's the plan for Tuesday"
Her: "Stay home"
Me: "Weren't we gonna grap a drink today?"
Her: "I can't I have to wake up early tomorrow for German classes. Maybe friday, I am free friday"
It seems like she doesn't even remember we had an appointment! But she bailed twice and I don't really feel like playing that game again. So I propose to get a few beer and come over to her place, we can have a relaxed time and she can still go to bed early. During the conversation I also tell her that my girlfriend and I broke up a few days ago (which is true). It doesn't work.
Instead she puts on her ***** screen and is like "I don't know what kind of person you think I am, but I don't want to go out with you"
So I end the conversation writing "Alright. Have a nice stay in Germany and a save flight home."
Later that night I make the mistake (I know I know foolish mistake) of writing her "Sorry about how I reacted earlier, didn't mean to be annoying"

So this is really ****ed up.
What did I do wrong? She approached me and seemed to be interested, but that bailed out twice?

Is there anything I can do to save the situation or is it a lost cause? I am thinking I should do something about it, since she is leaving Germany on Sunday, I have nothing to lose really.
So I have a few options.
1.) I am having a drink with a few friends today. I can invite her there. Considering the fact we didn't have a really nice conversation yesterday and she will have German classes tomorrow, too, I think that's a bad idea.
2.) I can ask her on Thursday or Friday if she wants to party on Friday, in a sentence like "Hi I am partying with friends on Friday, wanna come?" When should I ask? Thursday or make her wait?
3.) Just leave it alone, which would break my heart (c'mon guys, a hot Brazilian tourist about to leave the country...wouldn't you wanna hit that?)

Another question I have is, is it smart to write or say something like "Hey, we had a rather bumpy start, how about we forget about that and try a new start/get to know each other?"

Thanks foro the answers!
Ilboy

 

[Michele l'Arcangelo]

You sound like a horny teenager. Are you making conversation with her before jumping in and inviting her out for drinks? When you talk to her, it sounds like you're trying to grab her by the neck with one hand, and pour a pitcher of beer down her neck with the other.

Sweet talk the chick a little bit. She's not an American girl who's used to the American ways. From what I gather, many Latinas that are NOT from the States ARE conservative, but, of course, still can be dirty. They just don't show it like American raised women.

It really does sound like you cannot get anything going unless alcohol is involved with her. How do you think this chick feels, a guy keeps inviting her for drinks at a party or bar with a bunch of his friends? Invite her friends to come, invite your friends to come, have them pick then off, at least make her feel comfortable enough to leave home. You are giving her all the reasons to NOT leave home!

 

[Ilboy]

Hey!
Thanks for the tips, this stuff does really help.

As I wrote you I had an awesome conversation with her when we met.
And I do try to have a conversation with her, I really do. But our conversations don't really get over the "How was your day" stage as she just doesn't really seem to be interested in a conversation with me because she doesn't respond much, doesn't ask a question herself and stuff like that.
She seemed interested before we had the girlfriend talk, but now I have the feeling it's game over.

She is taking German classes during the day and is only available at nights, so I don't really know what else to do than grap a drink. I mean, if she doesn't want to drink alcohol, heck they have soft drinks at a bar!
I thought of inviting her friends over for new years eve, too, but I didn't for two reasons: a) it wasn't my house, so I can't show up with 10 people and b) I didn't want it to look like I bend over backwards to get down with her.

I'd need some help with what I should do next.
I could offer her to help her with her German, what do you think? If I wrote her something like "Hey, I am sorry for yesterday, it was kind of stupid. As a way to make up to you I'd like to help you with your German. We can go to a Starbucks have a drink and I can see if I can answer any questions you have or help you understand things better?"
If I do that I have to write it tonight and make the appointment for tomorrow.
Does this come over as too needy? Should I get rid of the apology?

 

[Yo'Mama]

Dude in my experience once it gets to this stage it's irrecoverable. Good luck though.

 

[Ilboy]

Yeah, I think you are right, but since I don't have anything to lose and I'll never see her again it's worth a try.

 

[Tovansky]

I don't even have to finish reading what you wrote and I just knew what your problem man, you are just horny and sound horny at the same time, and girl sees it as desperate. So yea, that's the problem. What you should do now? move on.

 

[Tovansky]

and maybe when you move on, she will look for you, but I heard she is gonna be gone before long? Then just look for other chicks man. and WHY FACEBOOK? I never ask for facebook from girls, just ask for their numbers, and call! no texting and those bull****s.

 

[Ilboy]

I don't know if that looks horny (I don't think so), but my problem was that I got angry on Tuesday.
In Germany when you tell people you're gonna hang out you either cancel early or do it. I think it was really disrespectful of her not even saying anything just pretending it'd be ok. So yeah I felt disrespected and got angry, which was my mistake.
I guess pulling that kind of stuff is normal in Latin America (I have heard of many Germans who had a problem with that kind of behaviour at first).

I did ask her for her number bro! But last week when I asked her she didn't have a German number yet, when she got one she gave it to me right away.
The problem is it kind of started on facebook. Plus things went down the sink now so I think if I start calling now that will be really annoying.

 

[Ilboy]

DUDE! It worked out, I got a date with her tomorrow, and it was her who wanted to meet!

 

[Tovansky]

oh wait, I think I misinterpreted what you wrote. IF you got angry because she cancelled date with you without being needy and desperate, it's totally alright bro. It will put women in their place, so you are doing it right. and since she doesn't have german number and such, I guess facebook is really the only way.

Anyway just trust the DJ in you. let us know how it goes mate!

 

[Ilboy]

Awww man that girl is totally crazy.
I don't know what the **** she is thinking. We were supposed to meet at 8pm for dinner. At 6 she tells me she has to pack, her stuff doesn't fit into her bag, she needs another bag and we can't meet, but she wants to really really really bad.
So I tell her to go get a back and we will see.
She gets it, she starts packing, and is telling me she really wants to meet. Then all the sudden she is like "Oh, I don't want to bother you anymore. Do something with your friends. We will meet in Munich. I am going to Poland and I will be free one week in March so I can come to visit you". And then she didn't respond.
So fVck that girl. She thinks I am a free hotel? Damn boy she wanna come here she needs to get a room at a hostel and something cuz if there is no sex involved there will not be a sleep-over.