What to focus on in the coming year?

BergischerLöwe

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Go to Eastern Europe, where the average wage is less than 1K EUR/mo. Become an English teacher to give you an in. Heck, go anywhere and volunteer helping out Ukrainian refugees.
I do think East Europe makes the most sense in my case. The subsequent questions are: Which country, how long do I stay there, and what do I do to meet women there? Is it more like I'm supposed to move to whatever country or so I just go there for a few weeks? How can I compensate for my lack of ability and experience approaching women? How is interacting with women there different than in America?
 
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MatureDJ

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I do think East Europe makes the most sense in my case. The subsequent questions are: Which country, how long do I stay there, and what do I do to meet women there?
You have an income stream - and have an EU passport, so you could stay as long as you like. You could do like Aaron Clarey recommends and go into reconnaissance mode, staying for a while in different places until you get a good vibe. If you travel light enough, you could stay a month at a time at different places, paying for a furnished apartment at the AirBnB rate. You could get into various volunteering situations, using the excuse that you want to "see the world". In big enough cities, there are always English-language social groups that are basically foreign men (but a lot of them are EthnicCel students) and local women that hang out wanting to meet such foreign men.

But yes, you still need to be more outgoing, as the chicks aren't going to fall in your lap. I think you had said that you play bass, so I presume you could play guitar. Can you sing as well? You could go to pubs and offer to play for free. A musician gets a bit of a free pass for meeting women.
 

BergischerLöwe

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Why not try a location like the Philippeans or a Latin American country like Brazil or some other place? You probably have to go to a place that it's normal for women and guys to talk with each other.

I can say that from my experience of going to Italy in 2006 it was impossible to meet anyone there unless they were part of the family and there were lots of prostitutes (many of them looking like hot 20 year olds) on the streets, that of course, travelling along with my elderly but younger & therefore much more functional folks, could not interact with either.

Unless you are part of a family/klan it's difficult to connect with anyone in Europe. It's probably easier to connect with people in the North American side than in Europe as it's less family-centric compared to Europe.

When people talk about Geo-maxxing, they are normally referring to going to a much poorer Third World country rather than another First World Country, or at least its strongly implied. Generally the cultures in First World Western countries are more or less the same and the same issues you have in one place, will generally carry itself to the other country as well. At the end of the day, you can't run from yourself.
What about second world nations, like the former warsaw pact countries in Europe? There are some parts of Latin America that might be interesting but I'm really not as familiar with that part of the world, and I've more or less ruled out Asian countries since I typically don't find Asian women attractive.
 

BergischerLöwe

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You have an income stream - and have an EU passport, so you could stay as long as you like. You could do like Aaron Clarey recommends and go into reconnaissance mode, staying for a while in different places until you get a good vibe. If you travel light enough, you could stay a month at a time at different places, paying for a furnished apartment at the AirBnB rate. You could get into various volunteering situations, using the excuse that you want to "see the world". In big enough cities, there are always English-language social groups that are basically foreign men (but a lot of them are EthnicCel students) and local women that hang out wanting to meet such foreign men.

But yes, you still need to be more outgoing, as the chicks aren't going to fall in your lap.
Hmm this is all pretty good. Maybe I'll look more into this Aaron Clarey guy
 

MatureDJ

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Hmm this is all pretty good. Maybe I'll look more into this Aaron Clarey guy
Read (or listen to) this:
Heck, you could ask him to do a video for your questions about the best way to get women for a man in your situation (he charges a moderate fee):
If you would like, you could come up with a paragraph of you situation, and then send it to me in a PM, and I'll curate it knowing what he looks for in a question. Bring up how you have a trust fund and that you have an EU passport, and have ADHD, etc.
 

BergischerLöwe

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Heck, you could ask him to do a video for your questions about the best way to get women for a man in your situation (he charges a moderate fee):
If you would like, you could come up with a paragraph of you situation, and then send it to me in a PM, and I'll curate it knowing what he looks for in a question. Bring up how you have a trust fund and that you have an EU passport, and have ADHD, etc.
Yeah I should send him a writeup about that
 

Gamisch

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If I knew, I’d do it myself. I’ve seen a similar precipitous decline in OLD following nearly a decade of dependence. Bars do not seem to have reemerged to fill the vacuum. As far as I can tell, the dance is pretty much over at this point in life. The fact that even being a musician apparently didn’t give you the clout to overcome this is remarkably blackpilling to me.

That said, if I had independent wealth (I seem to recall someone mentioning you do), I would geomaxx, for whatever it’s still worth. The grass is not as much greener as it once was, but it’s still an improvement.
This.


The dance is over. Acceptance is key.

OP needs to realize that IF he gets a woman most of his REAL problems will only begin.
 

BoomToTheMoonAlice

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You have an income stream - and have an EU passport, so you could stay as long as you like. You could do like Aaron Clarey recommends and go into reconnaissance mode, staying for a while in different places until you get a good vibe. If you travel light enough, you could stay a month at a time at different places, paying for a furnished apartment at the AirBnB rate. You could get into various volunteering situations, using the excuse that you want to "see the world". In big enough cities, there are always English-language social groups that are basically foreign men (but a lot of them are EthnicCel students) and local women that hang out wanting to meet such foreign men.

But yes, you still need to be more outgoing, as the chicks aren't going to fall in your lap. I think you had said that you play bass, so I presume you could play guitar. Can you sing as well? You could go to pubs and offer to play for free. A musician gets a bit of a free pass for meeting women.
I don't think volunteering is in these guy's vocabularies.

A lot of attitudes would change on this forum if they volunteered at an Orphanage.
 

Murk

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God, money and fitness. Same as always.
 

BergischerLöwe

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This.


The dance is over. Acceptance is key.

OP needs to realize that IF he gets a woman most of his REAL problems will only begin.
So I should stop thinking about women and accept being alone? At least that's what I've extrapolated from this comment
 

Channel your excited feelings into positive thoughts and behaviors. You will attract women by being enthusiastic, radiating energy, and becoming someone who is fun to be around.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Gamisch

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Yes.. don't want to be too pessimistic, but you have actually zero clue about how much POM(peace of mind) you have now.

Once such a "sweet angel " enters your life everything will change. You have absolutely no idea how good life is now.

Especially a man like you who lacks experience will be a victim. If i was you and my options were to either be alone in peace, or have a hurricane living in my house...I'd know what to pick
 

BergischerLöwe

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[
Yes.. don't want to be too pessimistic, but you have actually zero clue about how much POM(peace of mind) you have now.

Once such a "sweet angel " enters your life everything will change. You have absolutely no idea how good life is now.

Especially a man like you who lacks experience will be a victim. If i was you and my options were to either be alone in peace, or have a hurricane living in my house...I'd know what to pick
Then how would I cope with being single all my life? Maybe you have a point but I want to know how I would go about curbing my desire for a relationship if that's the case
 

Gamisch

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Then how would I cope with being single all my life? Maybe you have a point but I want to know how I would go about curbing my desire for a relationship if that's the case
How does a man or woman who lives in a 3rd world shytehole copes with reality? Or a child without parents? Or a person in a wheelchair?

You "just" do it.

You dont read what i wrote. You obviously CANNOT imagine what its like to live with a woman. If you did, you'd rather have the POM and stay alone.


You say you're single like it's an embarrassment, I say i am single as an accomplishment.

Your best bet is two 1. Resign from "the game you've never played " , and 2. Feck hookers /escorts /be a sugar daddy /pay for play.

eventually we will all pay a hefty price for p00sy anyway.
 

corrector

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Then how would I cope with being single all my life? Maybe you have a point but I want to know how I would go about curbing my desire for a relationship if that's the case
Hire an escort with gfe experience. Try an escort that has your same religion (ie get an east indian escort that speaks hindi). I would never use these type of escorts as I worried I get hindu things on me. They also have lots of brothels in India, a country that is full of your religion so many of them are probably hindus too. Also I would be curious of any specific reference in your bagdivad gita that even says women like that are bad to deal with. I know its wrong in my religion because its part of the devil kingdom. However, let us know about why you have a mental block here.
 
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RangerMIke

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A man's priorities should be in this order:

(1) Develop patience and discipline. If you do not have these traits personal development is impossible. Don't compare yourself to others, only the progress you are making... which will be slow. set goals and track your progress. The best way to instill discipline is to pick something, anything, and stick with it. It's best to pick something that adds value to your life, can be learning a new language, playing a musically instrument, finishing a course of study... anything. It is a lot easier NOT to do something than to do it... you have to fight this.

(2) Personal health. If you aren't physically and mentally healthy everything else you do down the priorities list is very difficult. This involves eliminating bad habits, getting exercise, losing weight, and getting mental health counseling if you need that. THIS IS NOT EASY... this also takes time.

(3) Get your finances in order. Establish a budget and stick to it. I am not suggesting that everyone do what I do, since it is a bit obsessive, but I track and plan my spending out two years. I track and check all my investments daily, when expenses go up, adjust your long range plan to take this into consideration. You financial planning should include a 'slush fund' for things that MIGHT surprise you... because really these things are REALLY not a surprise... replacing tires, eye glasses... your damaged cell phone... operation and maintenance. After a couple of years doing this, you may not know EXACTLY what you are going to have with unplanned spending, after a period of time you'll have a pretty good idea what you may have to deal with. If is better to have a fund in a money market fund that you can tap into when you need it, rather than having to borrow money to handle this. Budget fun money... very important... every month... if you didn't spend the fun money in a month... then put it in your money market fund. You know what you expect to earn... and what you expect to spend... so make a plan. Regrettably if you are a wife or live in girlfriend, this is VERY hard... but you have to be the man and get control of this sh1t. If she won't go alone with your plan... dump her.... you need a partner not a passenger. You can either be the captain of a ship giving orders and steering the vessel, or the first class steward constantly trying to meet the wants of your 1st class passenger.

(4) Manage your career: If you are in a job that isn't paying enough or you have a job that soul sucking, then go get the skills needed to change things up. Sometimes you have to just suck it up and do whatever you need to do to get by, but this should NEVER be your long range plan.

(5) Take care of your family: If you have kids... they MUST be a priority over chicks, over fun, over anything that isn't keeping you healthy physically, mentally, and fiscally. TRUST ME... if you ignore this, then bad news does not get better with time. A child that is ignored and not cared for when they are little will become total sh1t shows when they are adults. You MUST find time for your children... it is a lot easier having a positive influence on your children if you spend time with them when they are young. When my girls were little... Jesus... I remember I would come home EXHAUSTED... the LAST thing in the world I wanted to do is play with Littlest Pet Shop toys, build 'fairy houses' int he back yard... read them bedtime stories... going on weekend play dates (Instead of watching games on TV). You are going to go to stupid @ss Disney movies and playgrounds when you would rather be watching and doing something else. Now my girls are in college, doing great, with scholarships, studying something that they can have a career with. They love spending time with me doing what I like to do... and this gives you the opportunity to shape them into people you want them to be. This is a key to long term happiness.

(6) Understand there is no magic pill: Avoid get rich quick schemes, playing the lotto is not a plan. If you are going to gamble with investments then make sure it is money you can afford to lose. Anything that gets quick results can be lost just as quick. It's okay to take some chances, but this should NEVER put you long term planning at risk.
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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