What the fuulake?

[the_m@n]

I'm trying the online dating thing. Messaged a chick with some funny stuff (basically teasing her) and she hits me back. I set up a date with the second message.

She messages me the day of the date and says "I can't make it tonight, I just got slammed with a 3 page paper due tomorrow morning. Are you free Friday evening?" I send her back that I can meet her friday but will have to change the time due to other obligations.

I haven't gotten a response at all. I could understand the original flake but why would she try to reschedule at all if she wasn't interested?

What should I have done and what should I do? Perhaps women are just heartless and it's just as simple as that.

I'm meeting up with a different chick tonight instead so I'm not crushed, just curious.

 

[Sue Madre]

I'm trying the online dating thing. Messaged a chick with some funny stuff (basically teasing her) and she hits me back. I set up a date with the second message.

She messages me the day of the date and says "I can't make it tonight, I just got slammed with a 3 page paper due tomorrow morning. Are you free Friday evening?" I send her back that I can meet her friday but will have to change the time due to other obligations.

I haven't gotten a response at all. I could understand the original flake but why would she try to reschedule at all if she wasn't interested?

What should I have done and what should I do? Perhaps women are just heartless and it's just as simple as that.

I'm meeting up with a different chick tonight instead so I'm not crushed, just curious.

She's lying. She got another offer. She is banging some other guy. She made a counter offer to mess with your head for fun. If you accept Friday she will flake again. Tell her you are busy.

What to do? Next her immediately. Online girls don't deserve a second thought. Just go message the next one and forget this one.

 

[the_m@n]

Word.

I should have just went to the bar anyway and got numbers there. I could have said something like "Well I'm still going, I'm busy Friday. If you want to take a break from your paper, you know where to find me"

Thanks.

 

[Lexington]

There's a much higher flake rate in online dating. You have to understand that these girls are getting bombarded with messages everyday. The ratios on these online dating sites are awful from a guy's point of view.

I had a chick pull the same crap on me once. She canceled the first date at the very last minute because she was "sick." I gave her another chance and this time, she flaked just as I pulled out of the driveway in my car.

At this point, I'd had it with this chick so I deleted her number. But she actually contacted me to setup another date. I told her when and where we were going to meet up. This time, she finally showed up and sent me a text when she got there.

Too bad for her, I was vacationing on the other side of the country

 

[omkara]

She's lying. She got another offer. She is banging some other guy. She made a counter offer to mess with your head for fun. If you accept Friday she will flake again.

How do you know this? It seems absurd that you would presume to know another person's mind and be able to predict future events with such certainty.

 

[Sue Madre]

How do you know this? It seems absurd that you would presume to know another person's mind and be able to predict future events with such certainty.

From experience. Do you think some broad off the internet is telling the truth when she flakes?

 

[Victory Unlimited]

The validity of Internet Flakes are always a little tougher to pinpoint because sometimes you don't have enough information to make a defiinitive judgment. In cases like this, sometimes ALL you have to go by is your dating/relationship instincts.

 

[st_99]

Why would you put an ounce of thought into an internet flake? You have to start with the premise that every girl online is fake until you actually meet face to face.

 

[the_m@n]

I'm not liking how much sense all of you guys are making right now.

I think what someone said about slowing down makes perfect sense. I just need to determine at what time to step it up because I don't want a pen pal or an activity buddy. I just want to make sure my intentions are clear right off the bat so I don't end up in the friend zone.

I appreciate the help guys. The whole flaking thing is new to me, I never had this problem 10 years ago... When dating was a hell of a lot easier.

 

[Nutz]

I'm trying the online dating thing. Messaged a chick with some funny stuff (basically teasing her) and she hits me back. I set up a date with the second message.

She messages me the day of the date and says "I can't make it tonight, I just got slammed with a 3 page paper due tomorrow morning. Are you free Friday evening?" I send her back that I can meet her friday but will have to change the time due to other obligations.

I haven't gotten a response at all. I could understand the original flake but why would she try to reschedule at all if she wasn't interested?

What should I have done and what should I do? Perhaps women are just heartless and it's just as simple as that.

I'm meeting up with a different chick tonight instead so I'm not crushed, just curious.

What day was the original date planned for? Generally it's a good sign when they make a counter-offer, but it's plausible she was testing you, as in "if he's really worth dating he shouldn't be going out with someone from the internet on a Friday or Saturday night". This is also compounded by the fact you asked her out on the second message. Weak game, too fast, no options. She sniffed you out quick!

 

[pdx1138]

initiating a date on the 2nd email *MAY* seem a little desperate, but I always do it by the 3rd or 4th message, but by that time it's a very natural point of the discussion. I've been asked by them sometimes just before I do, again on the 3rd or 4th message.

I don't believe in waiting until a 5th or 6th message to ask them out just for the sake of it. I certainly don't wait weeks or months like some guys do either.

I just do it naturally in the progression of our exchanged msgs within 3 or 4 and I've never been turned down.