what should i reply with?

[big weezy]

i picked up this italian girl a couple weeks ago who works in banking (i.e. works stupid hours like 7am - 8pm at least every day) so her free time is limited, she's also looking for a new place to live as her landlord is kicking her out so when i met her she was about to go see a new place.

i called her few days later, and texted her that i hoped the new place search was going well. no reply or call back.

i wait about a week and a bit and called 2 days ago, no answer and i left a text telling her i was busy fri and sat and we should get together for a drink sunday evening.

she didnt reply.. until today this afternoon she sends me a text of 'hey sorry i am a bit swamped these days with apartments and work. what about next week?'

i've had texts like these before.. usually means low interest and wants you to still chase to show i still want her. still wants my attention.

what should i reply with? or does it not matter?

 

[BadNews]

I'd pick a day or two that you will have some free time and offer to meet her on either of those days.

"I can probably do Monday or Wednesday. Lemme know if either of those work for you."

 

[kenpiffyjr]

Yep, low IL bro with a attempt to get attention from you. Proceed with caution. Id give her a date like dude said above...no jokes, no lols...just straight to the point... and if she says she can't, don't reply. Your frame is worth more than that.

 

[big weezy]

so is it pointless letting her decide?

i know she works long hours, i know she's busy looking for a new apartment to live. regardless if she had higher IL she'd make time.

is it weak to say 'yeah maybe, when next week?'

putting ball in her court. OR is it better as you say above to say which days im free?

 

[big weezy]

more importantly is it possible to leave a text that would infer she does not have my attention or is that impossible? it seems pointless replying. unless i just leave it as 'i dont know. maybe, i'll let you know'

and leave it and dont let her know. if shes genuinely interested she'd come back? even just to see if she's still got my attention?

i feel as if this is the point where i start to act less interested and communicate that to her.

she wants my attention to know she's still got me, me giving a less than enthusiastic response is going to at least communicate i'm losing interest right?

 

[Tiguere]

if she works those crazy hours which i dont believe then she must have 2 days off a week.

low interest DONT BOTHER!

answer me this how and where did you meet her?

 

[big weezy]

if she works those crazy hours which i dont believe then she must have 2 days off a week.

low interest DONT BOTHER!

answer me this how and where did you meet her?

she works for an american investment bank, and the partuicular one she works for i know for a fact makes them work the hardest out of all the investment banks and likewise pays them the most. so she def works at least those hours if not worse. maybe 8am-7pm mon-fri. so people like that their free time is so important, hence her low IL in me that she would not want to dedicate an evening to meet me for a drink.

anyway i met her in starbucks, she was by the window i sat by her, she took a call, when she got off it i asked her where she was from cos she had a sexy accent. talked a bit, complimented her complexion a little, shes not amazing attractive. HB7 i'd say.

got the number, as she was leaving to go see an apartment, told her to wait cos i wanted to miss call it, and leave my name so she spelt it right. that mighta put her off a bit cos she had to be somewhere.

anyway, if i assume she's got low IL i dont think me offering a time is gona do me any good apart from convince her she has my attention.

if i were to send something like 'hey, i might be quite busy next week, so i dont know, maybe. i'll let u know.'

that would throw her off a bit and shows i'm less interested cos she hasn't given me a firm time. then i'll just wait it out to see if she follows up to ask me why i didn't contact her?

tbh, my frame is more important to me and i dont mind throwing her away at the expense of maintaining my pride.

 

[big weezy]

None of this matters..

First off why in the fvck are you texting her to hang out right away? You use texting to continue the conversation and get her on the phone - not to set a date up.

What you have been texting: "Hey lets hangout at xxx time on xxx day"
What you should be texting her: "Hey what happened to you...we were supposed to get TV dinners, watch HBO, and have 20 children together...what you don't like kids?"

BTW...the above example is not meant to be sincere and therefore you're not actually trying to setup a date. You're only trying to banter/be playful with her. That's all texting is about - once you get a good consistent flow of about 6-7 texts you call! Than you can go into rapport and eventually set up a date.

EDIT: And I just noticed you have an ego AKA hurt your pride - you're going to want to get rid of that if you want to have success with women. It's a numbers game and your little ego will get it's fair share of licks if you don't realize it's a load of BS anyways.

i did call, she didnt pick up. what im noticing is all the time when i call they never pick up or call back.. then when i text they'll reply.. it's a pain. it's like i might as well text in the first place rather than waste my time making a call and then having to wait before i contact again.

what im saying is the text she's sent to me doesn't sound like a sincere date offer.. more an ambiguous cry for attention to see if she's still got me. 'how about next week?' is an insincere offer of a date time which if i agree to and offer a day/time she could either a)agree to then flake. or b)just not respond.

i might as well nip it in the bud seeing as i already offered her a time to meet, she didnt counter offer with a definitive day so therefore i'm not gona offer her another time.

is there any reason why me saying i'm gona be too busy and i'll let her know (but dont) gona hurt my chances when i already sense low IL?

 

[Tortendieb]

Wow, she must be smoking hot! Because:

i've had texts like these before.. usually means low interest and wants you to still chase to show i still want her. still wants my attention.

So you already know what to do but she's so incredibly hot that you don't want to break off contact

 

[Diaforetikos]

Why are you tryi g so hard on such low interest? And i noticed your gave her hella compliments. For what? Give her one to let her know your interested. The rest needs to genuinely earn.

Your initial approach and conversation didnt leave enough impact to raise her interest. Try again with a different girl. Live and learn.