What should I do? Friendship...

WhAcKeD!

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Well Ive got a little problem on my hands. Theres this girl I really really like, but the only problem is, she has a boyfriend. So that means all we can do is be friends. I got into a little fight with her about us being friends and basically said I dont want it anymore. I have so many mixed feelings about her its killing me. Part of me likes her and wants to be her friend, part of me doesnt want to be around her, and part of me wants to be her boyfriend. My question is what shoud I do...remain her friend? Or just stop talking to her and end it, please give me some advice. I get real pissed off at her sometimes cause shes not my gf, is that me just being greedy or what. Please help. Thanks.
 

n2o666

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It would be better to break ties in my oppinion. You cannot truly be friends with someone who you are romantically interested in. I tried for a year an a half and it just doesn't work. She will still be in your head and this will stop you making progress with other woman. Also whenever she falls out with the bf she will come crying to you.

Just my 2cents.
 

Cremasta

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Originally posted by WhAcKeD!
I get real pissed off at her sometimes cause shes not my gf, is that me just being greedy or what.
You said yourself you don't have the ability to be around her if you're not with her. Don't piss her off, just make yourself scarce.

If she is 16 like you, then chances are her and her bf will break up in the not so distant future. You will have an opportunity with her, but not if she hates you because you were an arse. In the meantime, be friendly when you see her, but don't kiss up to her and don't try to hang out with her.
 
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never have "girll" friends - just acquaintances - unless she wants to hook you up with one of her girls. Does she know that you don't want to be her friend because you like her romantically?
 

NewMan

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It will be easier on you if you just break off ties.

Seeing her - and not "Being" with her, will fvck you up in the head - and you will not be happy.

Plus, you are giving more than she is. She's taking what she wants from you - friendship, a guy who wants her and therefore will treat her well - and what is she giving you in return?

If she knows how you feel, she's only being selfish by telling you just to be friends.
 

Befuddled

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Move along. break off contact....preferably gradually and without incident. Apparently it'll a little late for that, but try to break it off on good terms, slowley.
It'll be good for you, trust me.
 

Viking25

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LOL...good one!
Ok,she is what ,around 16? Here's what I would do. Put her on the back burner,don't invest too much time or energy in her,but stay friendly. When she breaks up wit her current bf,she will run to YOU..and most likely will want to rebound with someone really fast. You are already her friend you sounds like you got a good rapport with her as a friend,so just keep an eye on her,keep it cool and wait out,while trying to get other chicks.Win win situation.
 

WhAcKeD!

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thanks guys, this really helped me alot. And ya...thats the problem. A long time ago when I was a fvcking dumbass I spilled my guts to her. And now, I see how pathetic that was. Thats why I think Im like this right now. Its hard for me to be friends with her cause she likes me as a friend and I like her as more then that. Last night I was really an ******* to her, I mean like BIG TIME. And I dont know what I should do from now. Should I tell her Im sorry, or just break it off to her nicely that I was a little tempered and then tell her nicely that i dont think we should be seeing eachother anymore. Thanks guys.
 

WhAcKeD!

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Also when I do decide to tell her about the fact that we cant be friends for a while, should I tell her online, in person, or on the phone? Thanks.
 

NewMan

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Tell her as soon as you can.

Over the phone is best.

Don't due it online or over email.

Don't so it face to face because you will probably just cry

:D

Kidding.

Over the phone. Less BS to deal with. Call her up :- pre-emptive strike.
 

OddTech

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Originally posted by WhAcKeD!
Also when I do decide to tell her about the fact that we cant be friends for a while, should I tell her online, in person, or on the phone? Thanks.
Everybody gave great advice. As of NOW, you shouldn't SAY anything. You already made your intentions known. There is nothing more to say. You didn't end it with class or style. And the girl is losing respect for you! You already showed your desperation, and you got into a little fight with her over that. Each time you show your desperate face, she'll lose more and more respect for you.

At this moment on, tell yourself that YOU HAVE MOVED ON! Don't call her, don't write to her, don't do anything with her. Kick her out of your mind. It's OVER. Get that in your head.

If you still have hope, get rid of it. Gohere for some more insight.

Good luck dude and I don't mean to be harsh. It's tough, no doubt about that.
 
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Originally posted by OddTech
Everybody gave great advice. As of NOW, you shouldn't SAY anything. You already made your intentions known. There is nothing more to say. You didn't end it with class or style. And the girl is losing respect for you! You already showed your desperation, and you got into a little fight with her over that. Each time you show your desperate face, she'll lose more and more respect for you.

At this moment on, tell yourself that YOU HAVE MOVED ON! Don't call her, don't write to her, don't do anything with her. Kick her out of your mind. It's OVER. Get that in your head.

If you still have hope, get rid of it. Gohere for some more insight.

Good luck dude and I don't mean to be harsh. It's tough, no doubt about that.
[/QUOTE

Ditto!
 

Cage&Aquarium

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Platonic friends that you don't choose are another form of women using you. Would you be her boyfriend if she was only with you for the flowers and the jewelry? I hope you answered no.

As your friend, she is sucking a more precious resource then money out of you. She's eating up your ego which could take years of work to repair. She is using you, attacking you, and as such, is unfit to be in your life unless it is on your terms. Drop her, she's useless.
 

Befuddled

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Originally posted by WhAcKeD!
thanks guys, this really helped me alot. And ya...thats the problem. A long time ago when I was a fvcking dumbass I spilled my guts to her. And now, I see how pathetic that was. Thats why I think Im like this right now. Its hard for me to be friends with her cause she likes me as a friend and I like her as more then that. Last night I was really an ******* to her, I mean like BIG TIME. And I dont know what I should do from now. Should I tell her Im sorry, or just break it off to her nicely that I was a little tempered and then tell her nicely that i dont think we should be seeing eachother anymore. Thanks guys.
dude. you dont tell someone else what u hope to do. here's what i'd do:
-just subtly apologize for blowing your top. tell her you were confused , etc. be honest.
-Thats it. cutting someone off is not a decision made at any single point in time. it'll happen...gradually. ease out of it. if you see her, put on the fake smile...thats all.... but avoide her whenever you can. no need to be rude or abnoxious about it.

besides all you want to do is distance yourself from this girl. no need to let her know she got to you in this way. just slide away.

Cheers.
 
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