What it truly means to be Yourself

[Revolution]

After reading so much B.S. on these forums on techniques and strategies on getting and seducing girls, it disheartens me that so many of my fellow male brothers are having a difficult time getting a girl. First and foremost you are trying to get a girl, there are billions of them. You are not trying to become the president, you are not trying to be the next Schwarzenegger, you are not climbing Everest. YOU ARE TRYING TO GET A GIRL. The only difference between her and all your other guy friends is what’s between her legs. Face it, girls are exposed to the same stuff we are. They know we get pi$$ed, they know we talk about them, they know we swear, they know we are a$$*****. So why would you want to learn about what to talk to her about, why would you want to learn about how to make her like you? Do you worry about that stuff when you approach: guys, your teachers, seniors, your mailman, your boss, your parents. You want to talk to a hot girl go talk to her, most of them aren't complete a$$***** they will talk to you even if they aren't interested, if they don't F*** her! Treat them as you would anyone else give her $h1t, tease her about the dumb stuff she says and does, laugh with her, laugh at her. You want to hang out with her? HERE IS THE ONE SECRET THAT WON'T FAIL YOU: ASK HER!!! When you want to hang out with your buddies do you get nervous and worry about if the say no. NO you don't, its the same thing if she says yes, congrats your going to chill with a hot girl, if she says no, so what? You are at the same point before you asked.

It is true when we were told be ourselves.
BEING YOURSELF is being a dominate confident male, who knows what he’s doing, he gives everyone $h1t, he makes fun of everything, HE CAN LAUGH AT HIMSELF, he gets what he wants, he isn't scared to being turned down. Thats what it means to be yourself. You can study all the tips and articles you want but your in a real life situation your not going to remember wtf the article on page 79 of the dj bible said, it goes out the window. Your going to be left with who you are, with your habits. They will make you or break you.:box:

 

[mintxx]

Dude you'll find a lot of guys on here are social retards. This forum is for guys who are not social retards and have already got their inner game, social networks, personal development down. A lot of people don't, including women, and they're the ones you fukk, chukk, and generally step over on the way to the top. As an example, witness this:http://www.succeedsocially.com/
This has even helped me with things I thought were already fine. I think the author's a member of this site. The things it covers are kind of important and they're the things you talk about. I take most of these for granted, but if I didn't have them to a reasonable extent, getting girls and being a good catch for a good girlfriend would be fukking hard. Trying to pick up women without working on yourself first and having a variety of social circles and interests is like trying to walk without learning to crawl.
[Interestingly enough, I never crawled as a baby. I rolled everywhere as an energy efficient alternative. I was lucky enough to have parents who liked carpet everywhere. One day I just stood up and walked. Weird eh?]

 

[Obsidian]

whoa, SWEET LINK, mintxx

 

[John-467]

The problem most people think about when others tell them to, "Just Be Yourself," is that the person on the receiving end of that message has been told that many times over and it hasn't changed anything.

But see the people that said "Just Be Yourself" were correct.....the problem is that they left out exactly which SELF I am supposed to be?

Nobody is just one person, we have different characteristics about ourselves. There's a weak US, there's a strong US, the key here is in finding out exactly WHO WE ARE, so we can actually fvcking BE OURSELVES.

The most attractive man on the planet, is a man that:

1. Has A Sense Of Self. He knows himself, he knows his BEST SELF. So he can be himself, because the person that he has found out that he really and truly was, was a cool person after all. The key is finding yourself.

2. Has a Sense of Sexuality. For sex is a good thing. Women express their sexuality through their bodies with clothes, curves, and physical looks. A man expresses his sexuality through his inner power and imagination, which carries over into his clothes and physical looks. It's all about sexual state, sexual mindset, and a "bedroom" mentality.

3. Has a Sense of Life. For I really believe that you don't start living until you have found yourself. So going back to Number One, I really think that's key. For when you truly find yourself, confidence, "being a man," having goals, having ambition, having great self esteem, being outgoing, etc.....all that stuff comes naturally.

I believe the biggest challenge in a man's life is discovering HIMSELF, for once he has found himself, he has re-connected to the power that lights up his world.

- DJF

 

[Obsidian]

Telling an AFC to be himself is suicide because you're telling him to remain a chump. Instead, you should be telling him to transform himself into a real man -- complete with confidence, goals, and a real life --and THEN to be himself.

 

[2Cool]

A better more intuitive approach to this whole be yourself stuff is to "know thy self" first. Then be yourself. Getting to know yourself is to find out what your interests are. Find out what you like and don't like, push yourself physically (exercise), discipline yourself by finding a hobby or an activity that you can take on regularly and improve upon, and grow intellectually. Take time to travel a bit, enjoy your friends, and simply enjoy being alive.

All of this takes time. This isn't the exact recipe, but a facsimilie of what you can do to know and be comfortable with yourself. The object of all of this is to not get the girl, in my opinion, it is to get YOU!! The girl is secondary.

Remember, you are the one that's living in your body day after day, and year after year. You need to be comfortable in your own skin, with your own thoughts, values, and etc. No woman is really going to give you all of this. She can help you grow as a man over time, but you need to come with a foundation (assuming this woman is the ONE.) that YOU can build upon.

Most importantly, you have the right to breathe the air and walk the very same planet as any woman, no matter how pretty or ugly she is. Once you know, are comfortable, and confident with yourself, you won't have an issue with women, or people in general.

Confidence is infectious and noticeable. Go find yourself!!

 

[John-467]

1. I can get money without finding myself, and that's a fact.

2. I can get fit and get a six pack without finding myself, and that's a fact.

3. I can get laid many times, and get married to a fine azz chick without finding myself, and that's a fact.

But see, I believe majority of us are DIFFERENT than the average male. The average male doesn't desire to find himself, because he has no inner passion or need to do so.

We have a fire inside of us, and I believe that this is what drives us to sites like these, and also to learn more about ourselves.

The bottom line is, I can know nothing about myself or the world, and still make a lot of money. Making money is simply taking someone else's solution or even your own solution and using it to solve someone else's problem. Lol, yeah, that's soooo difficult right?

The bottom line is, women aren't all the same. Some are good relationship people, some aren't. Being sexual with attract all women to you, then you just filter them to see whos the good relationship material and who's not. I mean, that's sooo hard right?

But finding yourself is usually for a HIGHER PURPOSE, a higher calling. I think in doing so, we all will make this world a bit better years after we have died.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Telling an AFC to be himself is suicide because you're telling him to remain a chump. Instead, you should be telling him to transform himself into a real man -- complete with confidence, goals, and a real life --and THEN to be himself.

Widely misunderstood and an excellent tip.

 

[mintxx]

Just as an aside to this, I think the best way for any guy to find himself is:

1. Eat an absolute sh!tload of good food
2. Deadlift, bench and squat for a year so you're a beast, then transfer to a boxing gym and learn to get hit in the face
3. Fight people who look at you sideways and dress well
4. Backpack around S.E. Asia and **** a lot of women, it's what they want too.
5. While you're backpacking, read the complete penguin modern classics

 

[Snow Plowman]

This is based off the new era of PU an the direction that its going to...

The whole be yourself is all about being "Authentic" instead of having an ego be authentic. Everyone of you are unique an you all should have your own standards of what a good life is. Whether it be going to college an making lots of money to buy cars, mansions, etc. Or a guy who drops out of high school to play baseball everday an drink at the crappiest bars on the weekend. If you love your life and love the way your living it then both ways are fine.

Being Authentic is like 10 guys walking down the same road. When you all get back together and share stories about your experience walking down the block. You'll notice all 3 of you had different experiences. An that's what it means to be Authentic.

You're unique and your the only person with your experiences and your mindset and outlook of life, Your "AUTHENTIC".

Maybe one guy was looking up at the birds. Maybe another was doing the same but seen a plane instead. Maybe another guy seen a girl getting fuked on a roof. Or maybe another guy seen a old man cooking eggs. If you notice all these guys have value to offer because they have experiences that no one else in the group has.

An that's what kills people in this game. They don't want to be "Authentic" an actually talk about what they want to talk about and do what they want to do. They think there stories aren't good, or what they have to say is not good. Overall there trying to say there "Authentic" self isn't cool.

Now the way it applies to pickup mainly is that when your authentic the girl knows your real. The way you lay a girl is just conveying your personality while she just watches an chooses when she has seen enough of your personality and wants to get laid.

Being authentic is about believing your outlook of life is cool and worthwhile. Not worrying about who's with you, what to say, what she thinks, what anyone thinks, etc. It's about being comfortable in your own skin and offering value.

The best way to get good is to have a structure from open to close. But just know what you have to do in the structure without memorizing any lines and routines. Just do it naturally. One thing that is very important though is that you must be in field and hitting up sets constantly. That is very important and is a must.

 

[S.S.N. 318]

1. I can get money without finding myself, and that's a fact.

2. I can get fit and get a six pack without finding myself, and that's a fact.

3. I can get laid many times, and get married to a fine azz chick without finding myself, and that's a fact.

Thats so true on that one cuzz....fa realz...

 

[muscleman]

You're forgetting that all these tips and techniques and lines and what not are necessary safety nets for those of us who weren't born or naturally become DJs. Fake it til you make it. "The Game" illustrates this perfectly. Neil went from being a chump to PUA (argue it however you want) using all these tips techniques etc. In the end he came to some revelations and discovered he didn't need to use all those lines anymore, but it was because of those same lines that he got to where he needed to be.

I don't get why people bash techniques on here. If it helps you on the road to success with women, by all means use it. Use EVERYTHING you've got. Yes now that I look back on it I've said/done some really stupid sh!t that I thought would work reading it on this site and other places. But how are you, personally, gonna find out what works for you and what doesn't without trying it all?

I now have more game and am a more attractive person, but I wouldn't be such without going through all the basics and some sillyness.

 

[2Cool]

1. I can get money without finding myself, and that's a fact.

2. I can get fit and get a six pack without finding myself, and that's a fact.

3. I can get laid many times, and get married to a fine azz chick without finding myself, and that's a fact.

All above as quoted by John-467, is essentially a man who is comfortable in his own skin. A man who is doing any or all of the above is reasonably sure of himself, and therefore knows his capabilities and limitations. Ergo he knows who is his. He need not go on a lengthy search for himself, because throughout his life he has been acquiring self knowledge. Either explicit teachings from father and others, or has naturally accepted who he is over time. As result, he knows himself and can do 1, 2, and 3 without some exhaustive effort.