So I've been reading these forums on and off for a long-ass time now, and as you can see from my post count, I've been getting along decent with just taking the advice and applying it, however there is one girl that I'm still unsure what to do about, we'll call her Jen. Her mixed signals are very confusing, it's in my best interest to keep/get her interested since I'm home for the summer, and I might've fvcked **** up from when I was an AFC. Regardless, here's some background.
I met this girl when I was in high school, she didn't go to the same school as mine, she's about 40 minutes away and we met through a tennis tournament that I played in. When we met I thought she was cute, however I ended up dating one of her friends that I also met during the tournament (in hindsight I'm shocked at how low my standards were at the time, but live and let live right?). So we talked, casually, I obviously wasn't looking for more since I was tied up at the time. Eventually contact just drifts since I stopped spending as much time there and I became busier with things on the homefront (school, clubs, applying to college). We stop talking for about 6 months to a year. Then there was the sporadic ("hey, what's up?" text from her) and we talked casually again, since this time I was dating another girl (somewhat long term relationship, lasted a year and half until I went to college). But overall, we didn't really RESUME contact until I was 2 months into college, now mind you I broke up with my ex by then, and Jen had broken up with her boyfriend once she realized that he became a fat pot smoking bum in college.
At this point in our "friendship", contact is 50/50, I still was an AFC at this time, however I did progress a lot from when I was in high school... when I was a WBAFC. She would text me, call me, whatever, and I'd do vice versa when I found time (I go to college 2,200 miles away from home). The entire time we talk she's very flirty, at certain points it even feels like we're dating (the pet names and ****). And this continues until I go home for winter break and we actually go on a date. Up until then I had been flaking on her for a while, whenever we'd set something up I'd end up being busy. (Fall break she wanted me to go watch her tennis game while I was in the area, ended up flaking to go to USC). But anyway, we go on that date, and there's a certain amount of chemistry, the thing that got me confused is that it wasn't officially a date nor was it a hang out session. At the time the AFC inside of me kept me from testing the waters in terms of using KINO or just being myself. So after we have the date and I go home, I try to continue talking to her like we did before, but it was obvious that her interest level went from 70/80 to a 40/50 (not as responsive, not engaging contact). So I kind of let it drop, didn't talk to her for months.
Fast forward to April, when I decide to get back in contact with some girls I knew from high school (Jen included) in "preparation" for my summer at home. At this point she's seemingly interested again, flirty, all that. So I feel good about it, (she strangely called to say have a safe flight the night before I left for home). Now once I got home, this was early May, I waited maybe a week or so, and I sent her a text, asking when she got out of school again. -- no response. Later I tried to establish contact again, no luck. So I just stopped pursuing, personally I don't think it's worth it.
Now I'm not looking for ADVICE persay, since I'm sure it's pretty much what I'm doing right now, moving on. But I'm wondering what I possibly did wrong, or what she was doing the entire time up till now. I've known her for a long ass time, maybe like 3-4 years. I'm just wondering what was up with all those on/off mixed signals she was sending.
Thanks guys.
I met this girl when I was in high school, she didn't go to the same school as mine, she's about 40 minutes away and we met through a tennis tournament that I played in. When we met I thought she was cute, however I ended up dating one of her friends that I also met during the tournament (in hindsight I'm shocked at how low my standards were at the time, but live and let live right?). So we talked, casually, I obviously wasn't looking for more since I was tied up at the time. Eventually contact just drifts since I stopped spending as much time there and I became busier with things on the homefront (school, clubs, applying to college). We stop talking for about 6 months to a year. Then there was the sporadic ("hey, what's up?" text from her) and we talked casually again, since this time I was dating another girl (somewhat long term relationship, lasted a year and half until I went to college). But overall, we didn't really RESUME contact until I was 2 months into college, now mind you I broke up with my ex by then, and Jen had broken up with her boyfriend once she realized that he became a fat pot smoking bum in college.
At this point in our "friendship", contact is 50/50, I still was an AFC at this time, however I did progress a lot from when I was in high school... when I was a WBAFC. She would text me, call me, whatever, and I'd do vice versa when I found time (I go to college 2,200 miles away from home). The entire time we talk she's very flirty, at certain points it even feels like we're dating (the pet names and ****). And this continues until I go home for winter break and we actually go on a date. Up until then I had been flaking on her for a while, whenever we'd set something up I'd end up being busy. (Fall break she wanted me to go watch her tennis game while I was in the area, ended up flaking to go to USC). But anyway, we go on that date, and there's a certain amount of chemistry, the thing that got me confused is that it wasn't officially a date nor was it a hang out session. At the time the AFC inside of me kept me from testing the waters in terms of using KINO or just being myself. So after we have the date and I go home, I try to continue talking to her like we did before, but it was obvious that her interest level went from 70/80 to a 40/50 (not as responsive, not engaging contact). So I kind of let it drop, didn't talk to her for months.
Fast forward to April, when I decide to get back in contact with some girls I knew from high school (Jen included) in "preparation" for my summer at home. At this point she's seemingly interested again, flirty, all that. So I feel good about it, (she strangely called to say have a safe flight the night before I left for home). Now once I got home, this was early May, I waited maybe a week or so, and I sent her a text, asking when she got out of school again. -- no response. Later I tried to establish contact again, no luck. So I just stopped pursuing, personally I don't think it's worth it.
Now I'm not looking for ADVICE persay, since I'm sure it's pretty much what I'm doing right now, moving on. But I'm wondering what I possibly did wrong, or what she was doing the entire time up till now. I've known her for a long ass time, maybe like 3-4 years. I'm just wondering what was up with all those on/off mixed signals she was sending.
Thanks guys.
