What is it with people that NC while still communicating.

SgtSplacker

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I'm not really a person that counts phone calls. If I wanna talk to you I just pick up the phone and give you a hollar, if things are cool with us then that's it. But recently I have noticed there are folks that just don't communicate. Men and women alike. Met a lady and we hit it off just fine but I had a feeling that if I stopped calling her that our relationship would end right there. So I stopped calling her and yup that was it. I don't get it. Then I hear from a common friend that she was asking about me, saying I didn't call her!! I mean WTF!?

I just wanna know, if you were in this situation would you pursue or let it go cold?

Am I some kind of attention whoar and I don't know it?
 

ArcBound

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SgtSplacker said:
I'm not really a person that counts phone calls. If I wanna talk to you I just pick up the phone and give you a hollar, if things are cool with us then that's it. But recently I have noticed there are folks that just don't communicate. Men and women alike. Met a lady and we hit it off just fine but I had a feeling that if I stopped calling her that our relationship would end right there. So I stopped calling her and yup that was it. I don't get it. Then I hear from a common friend that she was asking about me, saying I didn't call her!! I mean WTF!?

I just wanna know, if you were in this situation would you pursue or let it go cold?

Am I some kind of attention whoar and I don't know it?
Idk about you, but especially at my age I keep some form of communication with them. Maybe send a text or get a call every 1-3 days. And she does the same to me. It's like checking up on your gf. Sometimes it is as short as a simple text exchange. Sometimes its a little longer phone call. It's possible that she felt slighted when you didn't call her.

But she didn't call or text you either, so I can say she is equally at fault. I grew up reading Doctor Love articles that always said do not contact her again until next week but I think that's b.s. A relationship needs some level of contact.

But if you want to fix it, I suppose you could call her up sometime and pretend like nothing happened.
 

VladPatton

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Sgt, I did the same experiment and got the same results. Chick doesn't text, let alone call, nothing, and the interaction is just in the air. No progress, yet no failure either. I myself don't get it. All you have to do is push a few virtual keys to send a message nowadays, and for a guy to initiate this 100% of the time comes off as needy, desperate, stalker, the list goes on. Sh!t's just whacked.

I dunno, chalk it up to a girl's low interest I guess.
 

Skalioppe

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I so know what you mean. I'm in a similar situation with a girl, when I make an effort she replies and flirts, if I don't it's NC and slow death of connection. The way I see it, if women are interested they make an effort to instigate communication too, it's reciprocated keenness. If you're not their #1 or their only choice they don't, and reply to maintain you serving their ego. I'm sick of always making the effort, so I'm currently NC, if it's the end (likely) it's of her making not mine, it only takes seconds to call or text, like I've been doing.
 

For_F

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Dude this sh1t fvcking ****s me. That's why I approach the whole DJ thing with an open mind. Some girls who are down to fvck will not initiate like other girls will. It comes down to a number of reasons i.e. not wanting to look like a slvt, believing in the traditional approach where men contact women nearly always, they have that many guys talking to them that they feel less of a woman or desperate to have to contact a guy.

I am still in the very infant stages of becoming a DJ but it's not like I couldn't get girls prior to stumbling on this website. The difference is knowing how to keep them keen, knowing when to dump then and knowing the difference between making your ambition to get girls and making your ambition to make you a man who girls chase.
 

For_F

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EvilAgenda said:
If she doesn't initiate, then she is not as interested. Kinda sucks, but you can turn that "hit it off just fine" into "omg, I had the best night of my life with SgtSplacker!"

Go ahead and call her if you are still interested in her, cuz hey, she was wondering about you, that's kind of like a major ioi.
This whole notion of she didn't initiate = no interest is not always the case. I've experienced several women who didn't initiate but I could always get sex or atleast some action when I kept initiating. Some women turn cold with lack of contact. When they see you again and you give them the human touch and all their senses are ignited, theyre down for it.

Girls play games and are bigger players then you and I. Yes giving space and time for them to miss you is good but particular girls do not always respond to this. Particular when not enough rapport is built. A few dates for some girls may not be enough for them to start calling and messaging you like youd want.
 

For_F

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EvilAgenda said:
Now if only I could all be as successful as you, For_F, and get sex or at least some action.
Sarcasm or truth-telling lol?
 

SgtSplacker

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It's been over a month now, and I just sent her a little hello text... whatever. I think I would be a better person if I learned to overcome this as much as it bothers me. It's just the principle of the whole thing I am just so undecided on.

Is pursuit of a woman beta?
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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