What if you're not awesome?

[Artelus]

I don't think that I'm an interesting person. How do you cultivate special qualities? I don't feel awesome enough compared to other people. I want to be exceptionally good at something...

Right now I want to become an artist and a writer, but I really suck at those two things. The vast majority of people who call themselves an artist are probably better than me.

And nowdays I feel like a really dull and monotonous person. I don't feel like I fit in anywhere. What should I do?

 

[Big Poppa]

You can't really control what your talent is and what isn't. You can only work at it. Why not try to find some hobbies?

For instance, I go rock climbing, free diving, scuba diving, and I plan to go sky diving for my 18th birthday not only are these fvcking awesome things to do and give you an intense rush, they are also interesting and time absorbing, so you're not always fumbling around girls.

I'm sorry but there's no way in hell a girl can say that scuba diving in the reefs while toting a speargun or a Hawaiian sling to fend off sharks that like to pop out from the dark depths of the corral isn't interesting.

And once your time becomes valuable, your price goes up. Keep yourself busy! Remember, too much circulation and the price goes down.

 

[eaglez1177]

^Poppa hit the nail right on the head

 

[Artelus]

Yeah, but I don't really care about skills like that. I want to have a better personality. I'm so fvcking dull and awkward it's not even interesting. I don't think that I even deserve anybody, because well, nobody wants to hang out with me at all. And I don't blame them. I don't have any kind of wit or humor or anything that makes me fun to be around with.

And that's the thing. How the hell can you "train" something like that? I don't know how to get better at this. If it's something concerning who I am, how am I supposed to change that for the better? And it's not even like just spending more time around people will improve me. It's one of those things like you EVERY job application requires you to have experience. You can't get any, so you're stuck.

 

[thehacker3]

Starting with hobbies and things that occupy you time will eventually lead you to being a more interesting person. When you can talk to people about the crazy mountain you just snowboarded down or the racetrack time you set last weekend, you become interesting.

Adopt some hobbies.

 

[King X]

I used to have similar concerns. What really helped me is that i stopped paying so much attention on what I was feeling and thinking and started to focus my attention on the other perons and the situation at hand. The brain is an amazing thing and you would be surprised what you can do if you concentrate. This might seem obvious but most of us are so self-absorbed and worried about what other people might be thinking about us that we lose our train of thought and end up with an awkward silence.

To get what you want you have to know what you want specifically. Do the things that make you happy. As long as you are passionate about what you do, and convey this passion when talking to girls, they should see your value. If they don't and you've displayed your passion to the best of your abilities, shes not the one for you and there are plenty of hotter and nicer girls out there.

I know this was a long post and I do have more to say on this topic but i feel you are searching for an answer that's short and sweet. The sad thing is that in life, you will rarely, if ever, find easy answers.

 

[King X]

That last bit wasnt to discourage you, just to convey that it wont be easy so you shouldn't give up at the first sign of frustration. Like they say, "everyone has a little captain in 'em." Find the captain in you and harness your inner awesomeness

 

[BlakeW5]

Like others have said just get out of the house and DO THINGS! Anything really, it doesn't matter. Listen to Big Poppa, it's IMPOSSIBLE to be a boring person who scuba dives and skydives. You may not think you're interested in that stuff but you'll never really know until you try it. Things like that make you interesting because they're not all that common, I mean how many times to you bump into and strike up a conversation with a skydiver? I bet if you did you'd find him/her interesting.

Wit and humor? Practice. You can't practice in the traditional sense of the word ,aka prepare funny lines for every situation, though. Just say the first funny thing that pops into your head. It won't be funny at first but eventually you'll get there. On top of that you're honing your ability to think on your feet (wit).

I understand your "job-hunting" analogy but you have to lose that attitude. If you think you're "stuck" you're gonna act like it. Where there's a will there's a way, you just have to put in the effort. Don't worry if it doesn't go smooth from the get-go.

I just get this feeling you're not really trying to change because you're scared of what other people will think or you're scared of being made fun of. Honestly, f*ck them. People are always going to hate on people trying to better themselves if for no other reason than they themselves don't have that same drive. It's kind of like people that hate on rich people: they want the money too, they're just jealous they don't have it

Unlike King X I think there are easy answers. Life in general is much easier than most make it out to be, they just over-think it. Quit over analyzing everything and just DO. Spontaneity's a seductive trait, predictability isn't.

Try my approach for a month and see how it works for you. If you've got an questions just ask.

 

[YogurtSlinger]

You should start hunting. Killing sh1t alway helps. You will have interesting things to talk about and you will appear to be more manly, kinda like a lumberjack. Not the gay kind though, the kind that is on the Brawny paper towels package. Eventually you'll end up with some funny stories about how you were in your tree stand and saw a couple making out in the woods or finding a dead body in the creek or slipping and falling in a pile of bear crap.

THEN you would be awesome.

 

[BananaSmile]

Hey if it helps
i quit a lot of sh@t over my pre and early teens
(i regret so much everyday T.T)

but just recently i picked up guitar, surfing(went once today but i like it), skiing (i go during winter, doing good , i started reading books, and i RE:started playing chess and swimming).

YOU DONT have to be good at it to be awsome ? you just have enjoy it and be passionate about it. I love doing all the stuff i mentioned above (althou books vary some are boring (like twilight(way 2 much feelings)))

btw dont go too far (cos im not gonna be able to do this stuff soon (if i move out ill have like 50 buks/fortnite for going out and hobbies sadly)

 

[Yogibear]

listen man, I can tell you that what I am about to tell you is the single most important fact of life.

YOU CREATE YOUR OWN REALITY

it sounds simple, but its all you need to know. If you tell yourself that you suck as an artist, then you'll suck as an artist. But if you truly believe you are good at something, then YOU WILL BECOME GOOD AT IT. This is what turned me from an AFC to a DJ

Just believe yourself to be talented, have some confidence, and express your creativity

 

[thehacker3]

Updates?

 

[LinkinParkROX]

Dude. Get out of your comfort zone. Seriously, switch off your computer, get out, and do stuff. Do anything. The world is your oyster. Seriously, do the most effed up shit ever. Peekaboo random women's babies, dance like Elvis on the sidewalk, anything. The key is getting out of your comfort zone, and developing a sense of "I can do anything and still be awesome. " in yourself. Don't be afraid of making mistakes or looking stupid - just DO IT! Once you've got that down, chat up chicks, go on dates, escalate kino, k/f-close, the usual hoohaa. Good luck!

 

[Mr.Freestyler19]

do sports in ur school man.....workout...etc...see i used to b like tht but now i rock....
example
i am doing lacrosse at the moment waiting for soccer to start...also workout, lift some weights, etc..
there so many things to do other than hit on girls