What I have noticed in older guys that get prime women versus most that struggle.

Jesse Pinkman

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Ever since living in NYC and now in Miami, I have met a number of older guys that actually do well with younger women. By doing well, I mean guys who are over the age of 35 getting with sorority girls and prime women that are attractive. These guys, however, are more of an exception to the rule rather than the norm. So what do they do differently?

They embrace the stage of life they are in instead of longing for youth itself.

One older guy I know through a friend owns a boat and has his own parties that he works with a club promoter to throw. A number of fraternity guys at The U (Canes) want to be in his circle and his world. So he will let them come into his world and be nice about it. These are not your average fraternity guys, these are well off fraternities at The U that throw parties where some of the hottest sorority girls show up. A number of these guys have asked this older guy to come to their parties and he has respectfully declined multiple time.

I talked to him about it and he said "man, I am f-cking grown, I have big boy toys, why would I ever want to go back to college or affiliate with that world? I mean sure go ahead and come to my parties but I graduated college a long while ago, that's in the past, life is good now!".

This guy embodies that underlying thing I have noticed in almost all older guys that do well with younger women. They take so much pride in their lives and the stage it is in and are almost repulsed by the world the younger women themselves run in. You could not pay these guys to go to a frat party even if they rolled out a red carpet for it.

I used to wonder what the psychology behind all of it was but then it started to click.

Younger people, especially women, are curious about what comes next after their current stage of life and they want to be near an older guy who is killing it in his own world.

When they see a Dan Bilzerian (I know, everyone hates him) or just any guy over the age of 25 (past undergrad age) going to boat parties, drinking at fancy rooftops, traveling to exotic locations, and living that quality life, it lights them up. They get curious. All along they thought life ended after college and here is someone living something different than the miserable 9 to 5 life. They want to be near that guy, they want to learn from him, and they want to be a part of his world. To them, he embodies hope for a better life than the one they are experiencing in college.

Because society told them all along the fun is all in college and it ends after that. The cool older guy who is living it up in his own world embodies something different.

Now let's look at most older guys that struggle big time with women.

I recently stopped talking to one of my old wingmen because he would creep on college campuses. This is a 30 year old man that does not even go to school anymore but he makes it a point to go to a college campus just to run daygame. This guy also "networks" with fraternity guys over game and parties but one of the fraternity dudes even told me it is so weird, they thought a 30-something would have his life together. Needless to say, this dude gets nothing more than flaky numbers.

Another guy I knew was in his late 30s and he even spent time going to a college town and trying to get into frat parties. It was some of the cringiest thing I had seen. This guy was trying to fit in with fraternities and talked about how they all had it made and how he was going to break into that world. All of this in his LATE 30s. That is not just sad but also pathetic.

But the underlying theme is the same.

With both of them, the sub-communication is "my adult life sucks, let me hang around you young kids". For college kids, it rubs them the wrong way. The first reason is because it is just creepy. The other reason is because it makes them think about how much life sucks after college if an older guy with money is coming around their world for fun.

Older guys doing this will call it "game" or avoiding women their age (thanks to BS red pill advice) but to others, especially their target market, it is just desperation. It screams thirst and no one of value wants to hang around such a desperate guy.

In many ways, these guys end up being quite desperate when you talk to them. The Red Pill will stick up for their behavior and blame women their age sucking which I don't completely disagree with. However, others want to see how you react to that. People can tell when a guy is running from something and to them out of desperation and it is offputting.

So when an older guy runs away from his adult life for whatever reason and tries to break into a younger clique or appeal to them, it screams desperation, and they avoid him for it. When an older guy has a great life he takes pride in and one that serves as almost a role model for younger people thinking of the future, he is that attractive older guy they want to mix with.
 

buddhafukko

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35 really isn't older, especially if they are successful men who own boats and throw parties, they are actually prime age to attract women of virtually any age. Around 45-50 most men enter a pool where even a lot of money and success won't overcome the age gap to get under 30 HBs. I've been in various diverse social spheres over my life but have never seen an "older" man with a younger woman in anything resembling a healthy or even legitimate relationship. I do know a handful of 50+ dudes who had 20 something girls but in every case it was either a sugar daddy or some sort of arrangement. I've heard PUA stories but believe I've been everywhere the clubs the churches the offices I have never seen it. It's a unicorn.
 

The Duke

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Take away his club connection and his boat and the show is over. Its really not about embracing his age. I've seen schitt shows like this play out many times, been a part of them. Nothing against your friend, props to him.
 

Jesse Pinkman

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Take away his club connection and his boat and the show is over. Its really not about embracing his age. I've seen schitt shows like this play out many times, been a part of them. Nothing against your friend, props to him.
Same logic can be made for a younger guy in a top frat, take that away, show is over.

However, although not to the same degree, the older guy will still doing quite well on the dating apps and getting a couple dates from them (his claim). He showed me his Bumble account and some of the stuff women send him, he had over 100 matches on it. Granted, he used a pro photographer and paid top dollar for one.
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Stanley

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Younger people, especially women, are curious about what comes next after their current stage of life and they want to be near an older guy who is killing it in his own world.
Because society told them all along the fun is all in college and it ends after that. The cool older guy who is living it up in his own world embodies something different.
Good post

At 25 i'm not very far removed from the college age demo and in some cases considered apart of it, but this has reigned true for me. I'm not bank rolling and hardly successful financially at the moment. But I am in a different life stage then the college demo and most girls that want anything to do with me are under 23. They want to see that life is fun beyond school and get a glimpse into what could be. Most these women tell me they don't want to date 'boys' their age for this reason because they are 'immature'. Also, most college girls don't like the whole greek culture thing anyways.

I don't consider 35 to be 'older', but I think once you've left the college life behind you (should) graduate literally into adulthood. A man who has his **** together or is getting it together is very appealing to women of all ages.
 

Dr.Suave

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Great post Jesse. You have given me some food for thought.
 

Plinco

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I won't even entertain a woman under 35 these days. I have nothing to talk to younger women about and I find them boring, unrelatable and endlessly annoying.

Plus most of them tap out relatively quickly. Young girls can't take d!ck properly to save their lives.
You need a sense of humor and you gotta train them
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Plinco

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Ever since living in NYC and now in Miami, I have met a number of older guys that actually do well with younger women. By doing well, I mean guys who are over the age of 35 getting with sorority girls and prime women that are attractive. These guys, however, are more of an exception to the rule rather than the norm. So what do they do differently?

They embrace the stage of life they are in instead of longing for youth itself.

One older guy I know through a friend owns a boat and has his own parties that he works with a club promoter to throw. A number of fraternity guys at The U (Canes) want to be in his circle and his world. So he will let them come into his world and be nice about it. These are not your average fraternity guys, these are well off fraternities at The U that throw parties where some of the hottest sorority girls show up. A number of these guys have asked this older guy to come to their parties and he has respectfully declined multiple time.

I talked to him about it and he said "man, I am f-cking grown, I have big boy toys, why would I ever want to go back to college or affiliate with that world? I mean sure go ahead and come to my parties but I graduated college a long while ago, that's in the past, life is good now!".

This guy embodies that underlying thing I have noticed in almost all older guys that do well with younger women. They take so much pride in their lives and the stage it is in and are almost repulsed by the world the younger women themselves run in. You could not pay these guys to go to a frat party even if they rolled out a red carpet for it.

I used to wonder what the psychology behind all of it was but then it started to click.

Younger people, especially women, are curious about what comes next after their current stage of life and they want to be near an older guy who is killing it in his own world.

When they see a Dan Bilzerian (I know, everyone hates him) or just any guy over the age of 25 (past undergrad age) going to boat parties, drinking at fancy rooftops, traveling to exotic locations, and living that quality life, it lights them up. They get curious. All along they thought life ended after college and here is someone living something different than the miserable 9 to 5 life. They want to be near that guy, they want to learn from him, and they want to be a part of his world. To them, he embodies hope for a better life than the one they are experiencing in college.

Because society told them all along the fun is all in college and it ends after that. The cool older guy who is living it up in his own world embodies something different.

Now let's look at most older guys that struggle big time with women.

I recently stopped talking to one of my old wingmen because he would creep on college campuses. This is a 30 year old man that does not even go to school anymore but he makes it a point to go to a college campus just to run daygame. This guy also "networks" with fraternity guys over game and parties but one of the fraternity dudes even told me it is so weird, they thought a 30-something would have his life together. Needless to say, this dude gets nothing more than flaky numbers.

Another guy I knew was in his late 30s and he even spent time going to a college town and trying to get into frat parties. It was some of the cringiest thing I had seen. This guy was trying to fit in with fraternities and talked about how they all had it made and how he was going to break into that world. All of this in his LATE 30s. That is not just sad but also pathetic.

But the underlying theme is the same.

With both of them, the sub-communication is "my adult life sucks, let me hang around you young kids". For college kids, it rubs them the wrong way. The first reason is because it is just creepy. The other reason is because it makes them think about how much life sucks after college if an older guy with money is coming around their world for fun.

Older guys doing this will call it "game" or avoiding women their age (thanks to BS red pill advice) but to others, especially their target market, it is just desperation. It screams thirst and no one of value wants to hang around such a desperate guy.

In many ways, these guys end up being quite desperate when you talk to them. The Red Pill will stick up for their behavior and blame women their age sucking which I don't completely disagree with. However, others want to see how you react to that. People can tell when a guy is running from something and to them out of desperation and it is offputting.

So when an older guy runs away from his adult life for whatever reason and tries to break into a younger clique or appeal to them, it screams desperation, and they avoid him for it. When an older guy has a great life he takes pride in and one that serves as almost a role model for younger people thinking of the future, he is that attractive older guy they want to mix with.
It's about being who you want to be and being happy. I play volleyball with a bunch of people in their 20's, I'm 39. I do it because that's what I have fun doing.
 

Plinco

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tksniper

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Ever since living in NYC and now in Miami, I have met a number of older guys that actually do well with younger women. By doing well, I mean guys who are over the age of 35 getting with sorority girls and prime women that are attractive. These guys, however, are more of an exception to the rule rather than the norm. So what do they do differently?

They embrace the stage of life they are in instead of longing for youth itself.

One older guy I know through a friend owns a boat and has his own parties that he works with a club promoter to throw. A number of fraternity guys at The U (Canes) want to be in his circle and his world. So he will let them come into his world and be nice about it. These are not your average fraternity guys, these are well off fraternities at The U that throw parties where some of the hottest sorority girls show up. A number of these guys have asked this older guy to come to their parties and he has respectfully declined multiple time.

I talked to him about it and he said "man, I am f-cking grown, I have big boy toys, why would I ever want to go back to college or affiliate with that world? I mean sure go ahead and come to my parties but I graduated college a long while ago, that's in the past, life is good now!".

This guy embodies that underlying thing I have noticed in almost all older guys that do well with younger women. They take so much pride in their lives and the stage it is in and are almost repulsed by the world the younger women themselves run in. You could not pay these guys to go to a frat party even if they rolled out a red carpet for it.

I used to wonder what the psychology behind all of it was but then it started to click.

Younger people, especially women, are curious about what comes next after their current stage of life and they want to be near an older guy who is killing it in his own world.

When they see a Dan Bilzerian (I know, everyone hates him) or just any guy over the age of 25 (past undergrad age) going to boat parties, drinking at fancy rooftops, traveling to exotic locations, and living that quality life, it lights them up. They get curious. All along they thought life ended after college and here is someone living something different than the miserable 9 to 5 life. They want to be near that guy, they want to learn from him, and they want to be a part of his world. To them, he embodies hope for a better life than the one they are experiencing in college.

Because society told them all along the fun is all in college and it ends after that. The cool older guy who is living it up in his own world embodies something different.

Now let's look at most older guys that struggle big time with women.

I recently stopped talking to one of my old wingmen because he would creep on college campuses. This is a 30 year old man that does not even go to school anymore but he makes it a point to go to a college campus just to run daygame. This guy also "networks" with fraternity guys over game and parties but one of the fraternity dudes even told me it is so weird, they thought a 30-something would have his life together. Needless to say, this dude gets nothing more than flaky numbers.

Another guy I knew was in his late 30s and he even spent time going to a college town and trying to get into frat parties. It was some of the cringiest thing I had seen. This guy was trying to fit in with fraternities and talked about how they all had it made and how he was going to break into that world. All of this in his LATE 30s. That is not just sad but also pathetic.

But the underlying theme is the same.

With both of them, the sub-communication is "my adult life sucks, let me hang around you young kids". For college kids, it rubs them the wrong way. The first reason is because it is just creepy. The other reason is because it makes them think about how much life sucks after college if an older guy with money is coming around their world for fun.

Older guys doing this will call it "game" or avoiding women their age (thanks to BS red pill advice) but to others, especially their target market, it is just desperation. It screams thirst and no one of value wants to hang around such a desperate guy.

In many ways, these guys end up being quite desperate when you talk to them. The Red Pill will stick up for their behavior and blame women their age sucking which I don't completely disagree with. However, others want to see how you react to that. People can tell when a guy is running from something and to them out of desperation and it is offputting.

So when an older guy runs away from his adult life for whatever reason and tries to break into a younger clique or appeal to them, it screams desperation, and they avoid him for it. When an older guy has a great life he takes pride in and one that serves as almost a role model for younger people thinking of the future, he is that attractive older guy they want to mix with.
As a 39 year old man who still attracts 18-25 year olds, I would say the difference would be my lack of overcompensating. When I was in my 20’s, I had that “rah rah im the alpha male” attitude. This turned a lot of women off. They knew I was still “learning.”

But now instead of trying to prove I’m the alpha male and sucking in approval from people, im more relaxed and give approval instead in social situations.

The subtle difference between trying to attain approval vs giving approval sometimes takes a guy 10 years to develop. It only comes from having a solid career, being in the best shape, and genuinely being happy in your own skin.
 

SW15

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Most 30s/40s guys don't date 18-24 year old women due to a lack of access and often a lack of money.

The typical guy in his 30s/40s is not a guy with an awesome boat or loads of cash to bring in young women. Also, the typical 30s/40s guy isn't going to frat parties or hanging around college scenes. I can identify with why a typical white collar worker who is late 20s and beyond might try to attach himself to the college scene just for the opportunity to meet very young women. Most 30s/40s guys are either doing nightlife approaches or swiping on apps.

A 40 year old in nightlife often gets ignored at bars with mostly 21-27 year olds. That 40 year old will end up finding a venue with more 30s/40s women and then get with some woman close to his own age.

If you are 35+ and want to date 10+ years younger, you're going to need to be exceptionally in some way. Most men 35+ usually attract women 10+ years younger through money/status.
 

BadBoy89

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You are confusing the issues.

An older man doesn’t want to hang out with a younger crowd, he just wants to sleep with younger women. Now in order to do so, he has be everything, tall. rich, handsome, etc. It’s not about the drive, it’s about the results. A man won’t get anywhere with a younger woman if he is not cream of the crop.

Generally men want companionship with older woman, and sex with younger women.
 

Men frequently err by talking too much. They often monopolize conversations, droning on and on about topics that bore women to tears. They think they're impressing the women when, in reality, they're depressing the women.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

shwami_salami

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1.dont have anythin against older women its just that my ex 15 yrs my senior (38 nd 21) turned out to be psycho so that put me off them
2. SW15 is right
3. If u guys had to chance to have a relationship with a) a 19 yr old who has no money no independence nd no common interests vs b) a 35 yr old woman whos a millionare nd spoils u, which would u pick? assume the 35 yr old is hot too
 

manfrombelow

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I won't even entertain a woman under 35 these days.
Under 35 or not, even the idea of "entertain" a woman is repulsive to me. I mean you're a man, not a clown, it's not your job to "entertain" a woman.

No men should "entertain" women, unless you are paid clowns.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Under 35 or not, even the idea of "entertain" a woman is repulsive to me. I mean you're a man, not a clown, it's not your job to "entertain" a woman.

No men should "entertain" women, unless you are paid clowns.
Based on how I used it in the sentence you should have been able to infer I meant the second definition of the word not the first. It's a figure of speech, it does not mean literally entertain it means I won't give consideration to.

verb
1.
provide (someone) with amusement or enjoyment.
"a tremendous game that thoroughly entertained the crowd"

2.
give attention or consideration to (an idea, suggestion, or feeling).
"Washington entertained little hope of an early improvement in relations"
 
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MatureDJ

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It's about being who you want to be and being happy. I play volleyball with a bunch of people in their 20's, I'm 39. I do it because that's what I have fun doing.
Gosh, I can only imagine how brutally a 5'5" man would get heightmogged in volleyball. :mad:
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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