"What Happened To All The Nice Guys?" - Epic/funny CL post

49au

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disclaimer: Obviously the guy described in this post is AFC. But the humor, sarcasm, and bitterness of this post are just awesome. Women really do have their head up their asses.



http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/lax/483318927.html

"What Happened To All The Nice Guys?"


I see this question posted with some regularity in the personals section, so I thought I'd take a minute to explain things to the ladies out there that haven't figured it out.

What happened to all the nice guys?

The answer is simple: you did.

See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were ****ing treated you.

At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.

Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"

Well, once again, you did.

You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an ******* than he ever wanted to be.

Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.

So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:

1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.

I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.

If you were five years younger.

So, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've ****ed yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bull**** and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't ****ing want you, now.

Sincerely,

A Recovering Nice Guy
 

JustLurk

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Nicely done. Damn. This should be spread to whereever girls congregate on the interwebs.
 

f283000

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While I do admit that it is a good post I feel that it somehow excuses and justifies nice guy behavior. The guy in that post ended up in that situation BECAUSE HE ALLOWED HIMSELF TO GET IN THAT SITUATION!

But the truth is no man ends up a woman's platonic friend as long as he doesn't allow it!

1. If you don't show sexual interest in a woman IT'S YOUR FAULT if she ends up putting you in the friend zone. I'm not saying it will guarantee success (it does increase your chances by a whole lot) it's better to try and know what could have been then ending up in the friend zone by default.

2. If you end up a woman's platonic friend THAT'S YOUR FAULT! We as men have a choice as whether to be friends with women or not. I personally chose not to be friends with women it's just not my type of thing. If i'm going out with friends on a saturday night you bet it's with my male buddies. If i'm going out with a female you bet it's on a date I don't hang out with women. I keep it strictly business with women. Sure I have plenty of female acquaintances but you will never find me give away my time taking them out to lunch or talking to any woman on the phone that i'm not trying to bang, hanging out with them outside of work unless it's a woman i'm trying to bang.
 

Maxtro

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f283000 said:
While I do admit that it is a good post I feel that it somehow excuses and justifies nice guy behavior. The guy in that post ended up in that situation BECAUSE HE ALLOWED HIMSELF TO GET IN THAT SITUATION!

But the truth is no man ends up a woman's platonic friend as long as he doesn't allow it!

1. If you don't show sexual interest in a woman IT'S YOUR FAULT if she ends up putting you in the friend zone. I'm not saying it will guarantee success (it does increase your chances by a whole lot) it's better to try and know what could have been then ending up in the friend zone by default.

2. If you end up a woman's platonic friend THAT'S YOUR FAULT! We as men have a choice as whether to be friends with women or not.
Eh I'm not so sure about that. A lot of guys have no idea at all what they are doing. They think that being the buddy will actually work.

They might also not know how to show sexual interest.

It's not until the guy is older that he realizes that the things are doing is wrong and he has to change.
 

Mike32ct

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Maxtro said:
Eh I'm not so sure about that. A lot of guys have no idea at all what they are doing. They think that being the buddy will actually work.

They might also not know how to show sexual interest.

It's not until the guy is older that he realizes that the things are doing is wrong and he has to change.
True. Stuff that is common knowledge in SS and the Community is NOT necessarily common knowledge to most guys out there.

Honestly, I didn't even know this avoiding friendzone stuff until I first read it in Louis and Copeland's book "How to Succeed with Women." Even then, I was initially skeptical, and it took several more years of experience combined with reading Igetit's posts :up: for it to fully sink in.
 

PapiChulo

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I was trying to teach my afc friend exactly the same thing (has had a jf for 4 years) and some of the things didn't sink in until he heard it verbally confirmed by the woman involved or had made the wrong choice even when advised against it (empirically). Still, the guys is not a fool but just stubborn like an ass.
 
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