"when he gets to be the age where he's interacting on that level with girls I will be coaching him on how to spot the S test and how not to put up with the crap"
Your kids are going to learn a lot more from your actions than your words. My wife and I show a lot of affection (open kissing, hugs, slaps on the ass) around the kids and also have an old skool marriage (wife stays home to takes care of house and kids and I work and provide). I saw this same dynamic with my parents and so did my brother. My mom waited on my dad hand and foot and I think seeing that really helped me in taking no **** from the women I meet. My dad cherished my mom and treated her with all the respect in the world.. I never heard my dad raise his voice to this day, but somehow nobody ****ed with him and when he said to do something, we did it. I'm the same way with my kids; i don't get too involved in the day to day grind, but if there's a major decision to make, or the kids have been acting up and my wife asks me to step in (or I feel the need to step in) I step in and handle the situation. Kids need to see this.
If your kids have a strong male dominant presence in their lives, I think they'll learn a lot through observance. This will give your sons the foundation of what it takes to be a man. You don't need teach them how to spot S test and how not to put up with crap, they'll need to figure that out on their own through their own experiences.