what do you guys do raise self esteem?

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,031
Reaction score
8,859
Say what you want, theres no bigger self esteem boost than pulling a girl.
It IS a big ego boost to have a very hot girl on your arm.
Problem is, when you lose the girl, you lose the boost.
So I guess you'd have to file that under "not true self esteem".
 

Naughty Ninja

Banned
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
2,427
Reaction score
98
Location
Banned
Stop worrying about women so much and you won't drive yourself insane.
 

Maxtro

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2004
Messages
3,207
Reaction score
31
Location
Kalifornicatia
zekko said:
It IS a big ego boost to have a very hot girl on your arm.
Problem is, when you lose the girl, you lose the boost.
So I guess you'd have to file that under "not true self esteem".
I wonder about that. Simply because once you done something, you get the feeling that you can do it again.

So who has more confidence that they can pull a hot girl? The guy who's done it before, or the guy who hasn't?
 

garruk

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2008
Messages
438
Reaction score
7
acutally i tihnk zekko i right.

that's acutally why i made this thread. i recently lost a great plate who was wrapped oaround my finger, and now i just sorta feel empty. the fact that i had her once only helps slightly.

maybe it depends if you're a realist or an optimist. as a realist i simply look at what i literally have.
 

Galactus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 8, 2002
Messages
708
Reaction score
19
What's more valuable than pu$$y?

Let's see... Diamonds, gold, Action Comics #1, giant squids, incorruptible politicians, The Lost Catacombs of Egypt (only God knows where they stuck it), Elvis's Sun recordings, the Northern Lights, fossils, and the Yellow-Bellied Sapsucker.

What do all these things have in common? They're rare.

Vaginas aren't rare. Their perceived value is based on how common they are in a man's life. When you put such value on one of the most common things on Planet Earth, you give it incredible power over you.

My goal in life is to make lots of money, so I can have the things I want, so my family and friends can benefit from it, and so I can afford to contribute something worthwhile to the world. And I plan to get lots and lots of pu$$y. Pu$$y should be a by-product of your goal in life, not the goal itself. Gene Simmons didn't get laid a million times because he placed a ridiculously high value on women. He went out there and put together the kind of life that brought them to him. That life also got him other nice things that are also by-products of his success as a musician.

The question was: What do you do to raise self-esteem? If you're talking about a short rush, sure. It will last a little while. But you have to keep getting that fix.

To keep having high self-esteem consistently, you have to get a vision for your life, and work towards it, and measure your progress. This makes you feel powerful and in control of your destiny, and it gives you confidence, which attracts women. I love pu$$y, but I know I can't just live my life like that, going from one girl to the next, with nothing else to give my life meaning. I did live that way for a little while, and it was pathetic. Males grow up tying their self-worth into how much trim they get, so once they start getting a lot, then there is eventually a point where you start questioning whether there is anything more to you.

I come to this forum to get better with women, just like I work out to get in better shape, or draw to become a better artist. Women are important, sex is fun. But it's not my ultimate goal in life. When you make it your main goal, that's why you lack self-esteem. You know there has to be something more. If there's not, then you are really on sad excuse for a human being.
 

Maxtro

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2004
Messages
3,207
Reaction score
31
Location
Kalifornicatia
Galactus, you have a couple of really good points.

Galactus said:
What's more valuable than pu$$y?

Let's see... Diamonds, gold, Action Comics #1, giant squids, incorruptible politicians, The Lost Catacombs of Egypt (only God knows where they stuck it), Elvis's Sun recordings, the Northern Lights, fossils, and the Yellow-Bellied Sapsucker.

What do all these things have in common? They're rare.

Vaginas aren't rare. Their perceived value is based on how common they are in a man's life. When you put such value on one of the most common things on Planet Earth, you give it incredible power over you.
Frankly I believe that vagina is grossly overvalued. The fact that a woman can charge $300 an hour for her pussy is insane. Of course it can be gotten for much less, or much more, it's all about the quality.

With the vast majority of women, their pussy isn't for sale. They have to want to give it to you. With the amount of difficulty in getting it, these girls might of well be charging thousands of dollars.

Pu$$y should be a by-product of your goal in life, not the goal itself.
Much easier said than done. So far it hasn't happened yet. For some men, it never does.

To keep having high self-esteem consistently, you have to get a vision for your life, and work towards it, and measure your progress. This makes you feel powerful and in control of your destiny, and it gives you confidence, which attracts women.
I've heard that before. I wish I had a vision, passions. Alas I have none. My goal is to graduate college and get a career where I will make a decent amount of money. Though without pussy it seems meaningless.

A couple weeks ago I attended a lair meeting/PU seminar and had a similar discussion with a coach. He was saddened to learn that I don't have any passions. Then he said he had a passion for getting pussy. Oddly enough I don't share he's feeling. I really want to get laid, but I've been beat down so much I don't have the energy to go out every night and talk to random girls in the hope of sleeping with them.
I love pu$$y, but I know I can't just live my life like that, going from one girl to the next, with nothing else to give my life meaning. I did live that way for a little while, and it was pathetic. Males grow up tying their self-worth into how much trim they get, so once they start getting a lot, then there is eventually a point where you start questioning whether there is anything more to you.
I would LOVE to try that. I haven't gotten any in a year and even then the way I got it was BS so it doesn't even really count. I have no idea what kind of person I'd be if I had an active sex life. I highly doubt that I'd be as depressed as I am now.

Sex is like a need to me and it's hard to focus on other things when the basic needs aren't being met.
 

DonJuan11

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2007
Messages
1,672
Reaction score
35
Maxtro said:
Galactus, you have a couple of really good points.


Frankly I believe that vagina is grossly overvalued. The fact that a woman can charge $300 an hour for her pussy is insane. Of course it can be gotten for much less, or much more, it's all about the quality.

With the vast majority of women, their pussy isn't for sale. They have to want to give it to you. With the amount of difficulty in getting it, these girls might of well be charging thousands of dollars.

So bitter and lazy. It's what the market dictates. If you could charge thousands of dollars for your "services", you would as well.

Much easier said than done. So far it hasn't happened yet. For some men, it never does.

That's because you haven't done anything productive with your life that can give the girl comfort. Sex is just ONE thing to do with a girl. Even if you magically find a hot hot girl and have amazing sex with her, what are going to do after having sex with her? Watch porn with her? Play video games with her? Complain about your childhood with her? Collect comic books with her? Or are you going to show her how to dance salsa like a pro?Even porn stars do OTHER THINGS with their lives than have sex. You on the other hand, don't.

I've heard that before. I wish I had a vision, passions. Alas I have none. My goal is to graduate college and get a career where I will make a decent amount of money. Though without pussy it seems meaningless.

So a girl should go out and have sex with you because you want meaning in your life? What does SHE get out of it? Guys so confused about this that they NEVER look at anything from a GIRL'S POINT OF VIEW. WHAT DOES SHE GET OUT OF IT TO DATE YOU? TO BE WITH YOU? TO TALK TO YOU ? TO GIVE YOU SEX? WHAT CAN OFFER HER? NOTHING.

I don't have any passions.
I really want to get laid
I don't have the energy to go out every night

They are called prostitutes my friend. She will give you sex IN EXCHANGE for money. All girls will give you something for the sex, and if you are too lazy, frsutrated, angry, bitter to give a normal girl SOMETHING other than money, you have to go to a hooker for sex.

The jocks, confident, and rich guys of the world get sex from girls IN EXCHANGE for security, protection, laughter. If you can't offer a girl something IN EXCHANGE for sex, you won't get any anything from her.



I would LOVE to try that. I haven't gotten any in a year and even then the way I got it was BS so it doesn't even really count. I have no idea what kind of person I'd be if I had an active sex life. I highly doubt that I'd be as depressed as I am now.

The way you got it was BS because you had no skills, no ambitions, nothing to offer the girl EXCEPT MONEY. Now imagine instead of PAYING that girl for her sex, you SHOWED that girl how you can fix a car engine, or you TAUGHT that girl how to play guitar, or you TOLD the girl about your trip to Africa and how you climbed to the highest mountain with 5 buddies. She would be putty in your hands

Oh wait, you don't do those things as you would rather watch The Big Bang Theory on Friday nights. My apologies.
 

beaker

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 16, 2010
Messages
24
Reaction score
0
I lie to girls. Always fun and some good stories come out of it.
 

initiatorhater06

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 30, 2010
Messages
193
Reaction score
7
thats what I hate about life in general, women don't need to have confidence, they can seek validation from guys but us guys can't seek validation from girls
 

Blue Phoenix

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2004
Messages
1,336
Reaction score
28
Location
Another Dimension
In a nutshell:

1. Your level of self-steem how much you like yourself and respect yourself and accept yourself as a valuable and worthwhile person is the foundation quality of all success. The more you like yourself the better you do everything. True self-steem arises from a feeling of competence. Everything you do that gives you a greater sense of mastery and achievement boosts your self-steem.

2. Your self-steem is largely determined by how much you believe in yourself. Your beliefs more than anything else determine your reality. You always think and act in a manner consistent with your convictions (what PNL people call "Frame").

3. It´s possible to change your feelings, atittudes, opinions, beliefs about yourself by feeding your mind with a stream of positive constructive messages that are consistent with the results you desire rather than the ones you fear.

4. What´s the difference between successful people and unsuccessful ones?
Successful people think: success, wealth, achievement, acomplishments, goals.
Unsuccessful people think: lack, loss, limitations, poverty, how much everything costs.

5. Feed you mind continuously with positive books, mags, tapes, videos, seminars. Avoid negative people, books, newspapers, mags, stories. Feed you mind with positive information which helps you, which is consistent with where you want to go and what you want to be.

“You are influenced by every suggestive element in your environment, by what people say, the books you read, and the news on television”.

6. Associate with positive, cheerful, optimistic, success-orirented people. Remember birds of a feather flock together. And the choice of negative people to associate with can condemn you to a life-time of failure. Get around winners, get around positive people, get away from negative people, get out of negative corporate environments, get out of negative relationships. Don´t associate with losers it doesn´t matter how long you´ve known them.

7. Act the part. Pattern your conduct, behavior and actions after successful people if you want to be successful and this is the key.

Brian Tracy
Also read shrink4men website!!! :)
 

Blue Phoenix

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2004
Messages
1,336
Reaction score
28
Location
Another Dimension
zekko said:
It IS a big ego boost to have a very hot girl on your arm.
Problem is, when you lose the girl, you lose the boost.
So I guess you'd have to file that under "not true self esteem".
This is a superficial or better saying ARTIFICIAL "self steem". Professionals call that "narcissistic supply". It comes from outside not from inside. When you rely so much on "external supplies", you´ll never have the chance to develop your internal healthy and long lasting self-steem.

It´s like walking with a crutch, your muscles "shrink" but you can still walk...
Now try removing that crutch, and the struggle will be great, AT the beginning. Figure the rest for yourself. :wave:
 

Galactus

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 8, 2002
Messages
708
Reaction score
19
Great stuff, Blue Phoenix. All true.

For years I've been reading books and listening to various CDs and whatnot, that say this. Some people, I think it's just ingrained in them, and other people need to be reminded over and over. I fit into the second category. I have good self-esteem overall, but I have frequent periods of doubt, and it always helps to be reminded of the winning attitude. It's helped a lot, and I believe many of the DJs here, including me, can make great strides in life if they internalize this type of information.
 

Blue Phoenix

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2004
Messages
1,336
Reaction score
28
Location
Another Dimension
Some more re-programming here...

Galactus said:
Great stuff, Blue Phoenix. All true.

For years I've been reading books and listening to various CDs and whatnot, that say this. Some people, I think it's just ingrained in them, and other people need to be reminded over and over. I fit into the second category.
Thanks. I´m like you too. But I think it´s okay as long as we don´t stay "in a slump" for a long time.

Going back to the advice that my best friend gave me back in the day; she is someone that was very much loved and encouraged by her parents as a child. I think that it helped her as an adult to be proactive in the self-love department; for the record she is one of those women that a man would never dream of taking advantage of. It’s as if they can smell the fact that she would cut them down in a minute if they even tried. At the same time she is very feminine and approachable. Finally just to nail it in; one of the most important things in life is the ability to love one’s self. If you don’t then you could probably fail in your relationship. You can be manipulated and abused if you don’t love yourself. Don’t be a victim.
Read more: http://www.balleralert.com/profiles/blogs/the-48-laws-of-love-law-number
 

comic_relief

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
3,285
Reaction score
49
Location
Baltimore, MD
I go ride a century on my bike
play a game of magic cards with some of my friends
play Call of Duty: Modern Warfare Two
Debate political theory with my college professors
Hang out with friends

Sometimes I can do multiple things at the same time.

- comic_relief
 

Julius_Seizeher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 25, 2009
Messages
1,235
Reaction score
75
Location
Midwest
Physical Training
Farm work is awesome, why did I hate this when I was a kid?
Shooting rifles
All things Investments: Due Diligence, Buying Stocks, Making $ to buy more stocks
Business Research and Planning
Political Writing
Cleaning up my Balance Sheet (Pay off Debt, acquire assets, save)
Continual Education
 

dead

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
26
Reaction score
0
initiatorhater06 said:
thats what I hate about life in general, women don't need to have confidence, they can seek validation from guys but us guys can't seek validation from girls
This is actually what I love about life.
 

Alien

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 25, 2010
Messages
141
Reaction score
2
Location
Hungary
Maxtro said:
I really wish I had something.

I went to a PU seminar a couple days ago and the speaker told the audience to fallow their passions. The problem is that I don't have any. There is nothing I love doing. Only things I do so I don't get too bored. Also if something is difficult, I have little motivation to keep trying.


Are you kidding?
 

Alien

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 25, 2010
Messages
141
Reaction score
2
Location
Hungary
garruk said:
just throw out some things you do.

i go to the gym
try to experience new things by traveling as much as i can.


etc

Going to the gym gives rather confidence...
Self esteem(for me) comes when i know that i made the right decision even if i had to put my emotions aside, or when i finished something great when everybody thought i`m gonna fail.
 

TheAsianLoverReturns

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2010
Messages
270
Reaction score
9
1. Helping out guys that had it bad like me.
2. Weight Training.
3. Boxing.
4. BJJ.
5. Being around like minded men.
6. F*cking different women.
 

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,115
Reaction score
136
Age
43
Location
Manhattan, NY
Maxtro said:
I've heard that before. I wish I had a vision, passions. Alas I have none. My goal is to graduate college and get a career where I will make a decent amount of money.
Well it sounds like you're just waiting to marry the first chick you bang, get a boring house together in the suburbs and spend the remaining years of your life in some passionless middle-management job.

So why not just try internet dating or something? Seems like you're the anti-Sosuave.net. Moreso than women, this site preaches chasing your dreams and passions. The girls come after that part. But you're not interested in passions, so you might as well just do whatever you can do get whatever random girl you'll settle for.
 
Top