What do you do when a chick does not reply on your message?

[oldmanofthesea]

You should not be texting back and forth with an LTR

Why do you say this?

 

[powersize]

She has 25-50 guys messaging her and she didn't see anything of interest in you. Did you escalate the conversation to sexual talk or innuendos at the very least? or did you keep it PG-13? If you did the latter, she probably got bored with you not escalating.

If a chick does this to me online, I don't try to reestablish contact. I don't have time for low interest women or for being kept as an orbiter. Next.



As for this, you really have to make a distinction between an LTR and a plate. A plate is just a friend with benefits and she's not tied to you, if she's not responding to you, you do the same as you would with some OLD ho, you ignore her until she contacts you and you find other plates to replace her.

You should not be texting back and forth with an LTR, and if the relationship is good, you should not be surprised when she doesn't answer you if you're going to see her later. She should also apologize for missing your text when she notices.

I did escalate it to sexual context. My last message was some flirty bull****. Anyway, I am giving a last shot and have texted her again asking whether she wants to meet up. I might be doing a mistake here but if so I will take it as learning opportunity.

 

[isasda66]

if she's not responding to you, you do the same as you would with some OLD ho, you ignore her until she contacts you and you find other plates to replace her.

You should not be texting back and forth with an LTR, and if the relationship is good, you should not be surprised when she doesn't answer you if you're going to see her later. She should also apologize for missing your text when she notices.

Yup I agree on the plate to soft next them. And maybe its ego but if they play that stupid long time to respond to the logistic text then I assume it as a flake and make other plans.

Why do you say this?

I actually followed it literally and seems to work well. Granted its with plates. Texting for logistics only. I'll maybe initiate less than 10% of the time just for random ****.

I guess the understanding for me is a new DJ can kill attraction through texting and its better to have stuff to say in person.

 

[deBrito]

I don't believe in hard rules, and what works for me may not work for others, but here is how I see it, based on thought and first-hand experience.


@deBrito
I have tried the cute funny "Heard you flew to Asia and are climbing Everest" or <insert funny thing that is more custom-tailored to what you know about her here>, and while it does work to get the girl to re-engage about 80% of the time for me, it almost never leads to a date. Instead it just leads to more wasted time texting, and more snubs. They like the humor and teasing playfulness because they like attention and they like the feelings it gives them, but it's generally not enough to turn them around enough for them to agree to a date.

If you are worried you need to give her a stronger signal, then focus on interactions with future women - don't miss your opportunity to ask them out during a high-point in the banter. That's when to do it, not when the conversation is cold. It's simple: Banter, dig deep with your questions (below the surface level - don't interview them with many different questions about many different things - ask something general, then drill down to something specific like asking them WHY they do that thing or WHY they like it or HOW it makes them feel, then share something about yourself that relates to it). Once you sense her being warm, you ask for the date. Done. It's that simple.

Having said all this, a guy I respect once said, "You have nothing to lose by pinging value into the void. If nothing comes back, what have you lost? But don't go into it expecting you'll get anything back or you are likely to be let down." One last point, if I do ping a girl some days or weeks later after she didn't reply to me, I won't ask her a question. That too is a request for compliance. Instead, I will throw out something funny (like some of the examples above) or maybe send her a pic of something cool I'm doing with a comment like, "Awesome weather to be on top of this 6,000' mountain today!" But again, while this often gets a response, I can't recall it ever leading to sex. Usually just more flakiness..... more ignored texts later, a date that she flakes on, or a date that goes nowhere. But you can try and see how it works for you.

You covered every one of my doubts regarding this topic. Great advice, thank you for that.

 

[Who Dares Win]

1) She has low to no interest in you therefore she doesnt even bother to reply

2)She got so many messages that yours slipped down in the bottom of the screen, if she cares about you she will wonder and open your chat and suddenly find that message....if she doesnt do it, see option 1.

 

[Romanemp22]

I don't believe in hard rules, and what works for me may not work for others, but here is how I see it, based on thought and first-hand experience.

When you are asking a girl out, you are asking for compliance: Her to comply with your request to ask her out. If you walked up to a girl on the street and said, "Hey will you go out for a drink with me?" The answer 99.9% of the time is likely going to be no. Why? Because she doesn't know you and has not had the chance to evaluate you and determine if she is attracted to you or not. Yes she can appreciate your looks but for women, a man's looks are a less important part of the equation than a woman's looks are for a man. She wants to assess your value, ensure you aren't a weirdo, and see how you make her FEEL. She bases her decision on that.

If you are texting a girl and she simply doesn't respond, that's an indication of very low interest. So given that she has communicated this to you non-verbally, why would you then ask her for compliance (by asking her for a date)? She is least likely to say yes at this point, and it will likely further cement her low-value judgement of you based on the fact that you aren't acting socially calibrated. You should be put-off by her snub, not coming back around even harder.

@deBrito
I have tried the cute funny "Heard you flew to Asia and are climbing Everest" or <insert funny thing that is more custom-tailored to what you know about her here>, and while it does work to get the girl to re-engage about 80% of the time for me, it almost never leads to a date. Instead it just leads to more wasted time texting, and more snubs. They like the humor and teasing playfulness because they like attention and they like the feelings it gives them, but it's generally not enough to turn them around enough for them to agree to a date.

If you are worried you need to give her a stronger signal, then focus on interactions with future women - don't miss your opportunity to ask them out during a high-point in the banter. That's when to do it, not when the conversation is cold. It's simple: Banter, dig deep with your questions (below the surface level - don't interview them with many different questions about many different things - ask something general, then drill down to something specific like asking them WHY they do that thing or WHY they like it or HOW it makes them feel, then share something about yourself that relates to it). Once you sense her being warm, you ask for the date. Done. It's that simple.

Having said all this, a guy I respect once said, "You have nothing to lose by pinging value into the void. If nothing comes back, what have you lost? But don't go into it expecting you'll get anything back or you are likely to be let down." One last point, if I do ping a girl some days or weeks later after she didn't reply to me, I won't ask her a question. That too is a request for compliance. Instead, I will throw out something funny (like some of the examples above) or maybe send her a pic of something cool I'm doing with a comment like, "Awesome weather to be on top of this 6,000' mountain today!" But again, while this often gets a response, I can't recall it ever leading to sex. Usually just more flakiness..... more ignored texts later, a date that she flakes on, or a date that goes nowhere. But you can try and see how it works for you.

Good point but what if she leaves OP on read after they go on a successful date?

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Good point but what if she leaves OP on read after they go on a successful date?

Ive had that happen a small handful of times. The first point to consider is accepting that it might not have been as successful a date as you think. Maybe her expectations were different from yours. If it was truly successful and she was truly attracted to you, she’s not going to just leave you on read. She MIGHT be playing hard to get but my experience with girls who do that is that they are low quality and will always be controlling and flakey and entitled and play games making things very difficult for you.... just a pain in the ass.

What if she was just really busy and forgot?! Have you ever gone on a date with a girl you were really attracted to and had fun with and just “forgot” about her text? When you have a good date and are attracted to someone initially, they are going to be front and center on your mind. You’re not going to just forget. In your blue pill days, how many times did you get anxious when you hadn’t heard back from them and then feel incredible relief and bliss when they finally reached out? It’s no different for women. If they don’t reply to you, it’s low interest plain and simple.

There are SO many reasons for a ghost after what you perceive to be a good date:

• Buyer’s remorse
• You didn’t go for the kiss
• You didn’t give her the opportunity for sex on the first date. This one took me a while to learn... women hate rejection and if they are really into you, or if they are just looking for sex and not a relationship, if you don’t give them the opportunity, they may ghost. But you also have to be careful about how you present them with the opportunity by giving them plausible deniability. Invite them over to your house, but the reason is to meet your dog, or show them that piece of art you were talking about, or just to have a few drinks on your patio because it’s on the way to the next place you’d like to take her, etc.
• A guy she is more into than you hit her up or came back around. This is REALLY likely if you met on Online dating since women are constantly flooded with a barrage of options.
• She is in a dead relationship and was just looking for some excitement and/or free drinks
• She is just plain crazy
• You said something she didn’t like. You might not have said anything “wrong”, you just said something that lead her to think you aren’t compatible or turned her off due to strong political beliefs or who knows. Women are mostly non-confrontational and if you say one or more things they don’t like, unless it’s something really bad, they will often just play along nicely for the rest of the date to avoid conflict and then ghost.

Bottom line, if she likes you, she will respond. And don’t forget that women know how to use a phone too.... it’s not like the only way to connect is for you to reach out to her and her respond. She can pick up the phone and initiate with you too. So really, if she doesn’t reply, that’s very telling because it means not only will she not initiate contact with you, she won’t even reply to your initiation.

 

[mrrippey]

Pet peeve of mine is when people do not respond back. I know people are busy but there really isn't a reason to not reply back to someone after a day or so. Yes people travel and people are busy but you also have to take a **** sometime and you could easily reply there, even if it is, 'Im wild busy."

If I send two texts and I do not get a reply back, I tend not to text again. My text are usually about a plan or some action like when we hooking up, when we grabbing a drink (pre COVID), or something like that. The text is not always about sex, it more about if we dig each other, let's connect somehow. If you do not respond then to me, you are not interested.

If they do not reply say in a couple of weeks and there is no reason that I know of, the number gets deleted, this ensures I do not try to reach out to her again and look like a simp. My time is valuable, if I chose to share it with you, you should at least ****ing reply with a text. If you can't do that, well, there will be no penis between us.....

 

[Glassguy]

No response is still a response.

Move on.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yup I agree on the plate to soft next them. And maybe its ego but if they play that stupid long time to respond to the logistic text then I assume it as a flake and make other plans.


I actually followed it literally and seems to work well. Granted its with plates. Texting for logistics only. I'll maybe initiate less than 10% of the time just for random ****.

I guess the understanding for me is a new DJ can kill attraction through texting and its better to have stuff to say in person.

If you lack the ability to text properly you should be learning how to do it versus avoiding it out of fear.

 

[Georgepithyou]

If a girl ghosts guys, is that really the kind of woman you want a potential relationship with?

She did you a favour by weeding herself out of your life, you gain nothing by calling her out so as many of the other members have already said.

Delete and move on

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Switch to telepathy.

Or find another girl.

Whichever is easiest.

Yep agreed.
The answer is to not give a fuaark and move on to the next one.

Girls are like trams (or busses if you like). If you miss one then there will also be a new one coming in about 5 minutes to the stop that you can jump on.

 

[bat soup]

Quite simple and common situation nowadays due to lockdown that we have been forced to chat with girls online.

So you have just started chatting with a chick, everything goes well but suddenly she just leaves your last message read and stops texting back. How do you usually behave in such situations?

Even now, chatting online is unproductive. You should get to the point quickly of meeting up and escalating.

If she gives you excuses and doesn't cooperate, ditch her and move on to the next.

(Covid is just another excuse as far as I'm concerned)

 

[MatureDJ]

Start spinning more plates.

 

[Dash Riprock]

A couple years ago I texted a very casual FWB on Valentine's Day. Something like "Hey you, happy VD day err I mean V day. Ciao, Dash"

She replied in June, four months later, saying she just saw the message, lol. No reply from me, obviously.

Just move on, man. No use over analyzing and dissecting everything; basically dumpster diving looking for scraps. That implies a scarcity mentality, hardly a DJ quality.

 

[bat soup]

A couple years ago I texted a very casual FWB on Valentine's Day. Something like "Hey you, happy VD day err I mean V day. Ciao, Dash"

She replied in June, four months later, saying she just saw the message, lol. No reply from me, obviously.

Just move on, man. No use over analyzing and dissecting everything. That implies a scarcity mentality, hardly a DJ quality.

She should have told the truth that she just got dumped.

 

[RangerMIke]

The problem isn't that she stopped responding. The problem is that it bothers you. No one owes you a response.

But really a lot of this depends on what you are texting her. Are you asking her questions or are you just making general statements... one elicits a response, another one doesn't. It's the difference between saying "I like corn." and "Do you like corn?" Did you text something insulting? Are you boring the cr@p out of her? Now this doesn't give her license to be rude, but you should be paying attention to what you are sending out.

Of course it would be nice if people had good manners and would just send out a "Gotta run... TTYL.", but.... well there are too many that don't know polite behavior. You can't control that, so you shouldn't worry about it.

 

[guru1000]

You cannot manipulate her genuine desire through text. You can spike it, but that will fade too.

The only way to create desire after she knows who you are is through time and space ... And seemly founded through her own volition.

This is why you dont double text because it looks at your desire through your lens and not hers.

The one who will occupy her thoughts is the one who makes her invest. The one who is seemly entertained with so many other interesting options including life, that petty romance is an afterthought. To this guy, who gives her space, she will initiate. To this guy, who gives her space, she will chase. You do a great disservice to their romantic fantasy by doing all the work for them.

When she steps back, you withdraw your time and attention. When she invests, you reward her with time and attention. Stick to this and then the question of double texting becomes a moot point.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Quite simple and common situation nowadays due to lockdown that we have been forced to chat with girls online.

So you have just started chatting with a chick, everything goes well but suddenly she just leaves your last message read and stops texting back. How do you usually behave in such situations?

Chick asked for my # the other day and it's radio silence. #next

Choosing signals, IOIs, and eye ****ing. This is female logic. Kevin Samuels blew up on world star. 35. Single mom. Wants high value lololol says, 20yr old women don't want older man. He went off and put her in check. It's women like this and others who are going to get a reality check out their ass. Enjoy the decline. Pillage what you can.

I can't wait for the crash that's coming.

Options FTW.

 

[deBrito]

Enjoy the decline. Pillage what you can.



I can't wait for the crash that's coming.

Options FTW.

Hey DEEZEDBRAH, could you enlighten me about this?