What do girls mean when they refer to their lovers as their "Best Friend?" (and more)

ArmyStrong90

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Whats up!

Hope you guys understand my questions need all the advice I can get--I appreciate all the help


1) I am having a hard time trying to understand what girls mean when they refer to their man (boyfriend/lover) as their "Best Friend" I see this on fb and IG posts, where girls would take a picture of their man (or vice versa) or a picture with them together, and say stuff like "I couldn't imagine spending a better day with my boyfriend/girlfriend but most importantly my BEST FRIEND"--I get what they are trying to say but at the same time I DON'T GET IT. I am confused because I thought when you first meet a woman you are attracted to, your intention is not to be her buddy but rather to have an intimate relationship with her (ie her lover) I have also heard from some people that you should be a girls friend FIRST so that she is comfortable with you then escalate over time..WTF? part of self-respect is loving yourself, in that case how are you loving and respecting yourself if you are trying to cuff a girl who is trying to figure out which man to pick out of her 3 (I actually met a woman like this that thought I would stick around after telling me that she has other men on the side..I left her) shouldn't you see yourself as the prize and ONLY option for her? I looked around to find an answer but I cannot find anything?

2) My other question is on whether or not I should keep in touch with the girl that led me on only to go back to some dude she has known a little longer than I, and whom she considers as her ex. Some of ya'll may remember the time I was posting on this forum about some girl I had conflicting thoughts about at my school and how I never made an immediate sexual move on her but rather hung out with her on campus and overlooked the many cues she gave off about being the type that has never had a legit boyfriend etc..well after that arduous semester she eventually went back the guy that did her dirty--she told me on valentines day of all days too haha (I saw it coming but I was soo emotionally attached especially after she was going through that month long depression when she told me that its best that I wait because she wasn't ready for anything yet) before she broke the 'news' to me on valentines day she accepted to be my date for a function and despite the fact that she showed me "attention", all night long she was texting a certain someone--I had an idea of who it was and was pissed. Well after we spoke on valentines day, she told me that she wasn't trying to lead me on etc. and that her boyfriend and her were never seeing each other in the past until now (he was trying to correct his wrongs and she gave him a chance) lol I was so pissed inside but I kept a calm look and told her she could have gone about it a different way rather than, for example, letting me hold her hand while we went on a walk or even kiss her lips when we were just chilling together (she knew I liked her) She was speechless and "apologetic" but had this look on her face of "damn I screwed up" because she got all attentive when I looked her dead in the eye and told her the reality of what she did. I left her alone and she started to hit me up about meeting up for coffee etc. and all of a sudden what that signified to me was; okay now she is doing this **** out of pity it infuriated me even more but whenever we did cross paths things were chill we would chat up like old friends. At beach week (Myrtle, SC) this past May, she got all salty that I never said "hi" or acknowledged her when she was calling my name--she never did, but I think it was her way of trying to get a rise out of me. Ever since then every time she would see me at the beach she would get up and hug me in the midst of her tan and socializing with her friends (this instance is the reason why I asked on this forum also about "why girls who have boyfriends are all of a sudden "nice" to you as if she was this way when she was single) after a week at the beach with the Greek life community (she was affiliated like myself as well) I have not contacted her at all and don't see her the way I used to--I am doing great for myself graduated, got a full time job and now a military officer, however I get urges to say something like "hey, how is your summer going" even though I know I shouldn't because at the end of the day I do not want to relive the past as I have now (really) learned to never care or make an attempt to be the first one to acknowledge someone that never gave a damn about me. Honestly I have had about 5 girls that were nothing but a waste of time--and this is not what I want.
 

bigneil

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It means that he was understanding when she wanted to sleep with other men.

After all, what are friends for?
 

Dingo

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#1)...Your lucky if your lover (as in a relationship) is also your best friend.

#2)... To long and convoluted to bother....
 

ArmyStrong90

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#1)...Your lucky if your lover (as in a relationship) is also your best friend.

#2)... To long and convoluted to bother....
Basically, after all I went through, should I contact her after 3 months since I last saw her, now that I don't see her the same way I once did.
 

Asasione

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Basically, after all I went through, should I contact her after 3 months since I last saw her, now that I don't see her the same way I once did.
Waste of time, chase other women and get over her
 

beforeimgone

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Whats up!

Hope you guys understand my questions need all the advice I can get--I appreciate all the help


1) I am having a hard time trying to understand what girls mean when they refer to their man (boyfriend/lover) as their "Best Friend" I see this on fb and IG posts, where girls would take a picture of their man (or vice versa) or a picture with them together, and say stuff like "I couldn't imagine spending a better day with my boyfriend/girlfriend but most importantly my BEST FRIEND"--I get what they are trying to say but at the same time I DON'T GET IT. I am confused because I thought when you first meet a woman you are attracted to, your intention is not to be her buddy but rather to have an intimate relationship with her (ie her lover) I have also heard from some people that you should be a girls friend FIRST so that she is comfortable with you then escalate over time..WTF? part of self-respect is loving yourself, in that case how are you loving and respecting yourself if you are trying to cuff a girl who is trying to figure out which man to pick out of her 3 (I actually met a woman like this that thought I would stick around after telling me that she has other men on the side..I left her) shouldn't you see yourself as the prize and ONLY option for her? I looked around to find an answer but I cannot find anything?

2) My other question is on whether or not I should keep in touch with the girl that led me on only to go back to some dude she has known a little longer than I, and whom she considers as her ex. Some of ya'll may remember the time I was posting on this forum about some girl I had conflicting thoughts about at my school and how I never made an immediate sexual move on her but rather hung out with her on campus and overlooked the many cues she gave off about being the type that has never had a legit boyfriend etc..well after that arduous semester she eventually went back the guy that did her dirty--she told me on valentines day of all days too haha (I saw it coming but I was soo emotionally attached especially after she was going through that month long depression when she told me that its best that I wait because she wasn't ready for anything yet) before she broke the 'news' to me on valentines day she accepted to be my date for a function and despite the fact that she showed me "attention", all night long she was texting a certain someone--I had an idea of who it was and was pissed. Well after we spoke on valentines day, she told me that she wasn't trying to lead me on etc. and that her boyfriend and her were never seeing each other in the past until now (he was trying to correct his wrongs and she gave him a chance) lol I was so pissed inside but I kept a calm look and told her she could have gone about it a different way rather than, for example, letting me hold her hand while we went on a walk or even kiss her lips when we were just chilling together (she knew I liked her) She was speechless and "apologetic" but had this look on her face of "damn I screwed up" because she got all attentive when I looked her dead in the eye and told her the reality of what she did. I left her alone and she started to hit me up about meeting up for coffee etc. and all of a sudden what that signified to me was; okay now she is doing this **** out of pity it infuriated me even more but whenever we did cross paths things were chill we would chat up like old friends. At beach week (Myrtle, SC) this past May, she got all salty that I never said "hi" or acknowledged her when she was calling my name--she never did, but I think it was her way of trying to get a rise out of me. Ever since then every time she would see me at the beach she would get up and hug me in the midst of her tan and socializing with her friends (this instance is the reason why I asked on this forum also about "why girls who have boyfriends are all of a sudden "nice" to you as if she was this way when she was single) after a week at the beach with the Greek life community (she was affiliated like myself as well) I have not contacted her at all and don't see her the way I used to--I am doing great for myself graduated, got a full time job and now a military officer, however I get urges to say something like "hey, how is your summer going" even though I know I shouldn't because at the end of the day I do not want to relive the past as I have now (really) learned to never care or make an attempt to be the first one to acknowledge someone that never gave a damn about me. Honestly I have had about 5 girls that were nothing but a waste of time--and this is not what I want.
Sounds like that pvssy is up for grabs
 

ArmyStrong90

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Yes, because he's a sap who put up with her sleeping with another man.
I don't know if she actually slept with other men since he moved to FL but I know for damn sure that prior to him graduating they were dating. She still refered to him as her best friend even then. I'm thinking they may have known each other prior to taking things serious
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

marmel75

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It means you are going to have a hell of a time getting rid of her
 

Konada

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1. Girls say that when they 'feel' a connection with you. That's all. Feeling 'connected' =/= boyfriend gives the pvssy tingles. Unless the dude's actually banging her which you have no chance if you sense the guy is a sap its green light on wh0re town

2. No
 
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