What did I do wrong? I can't figure these types of girls out

[Aspiring Don Juan]

Today I'm pretty happy because I got a kiss, but it wasn't in a way that I wanted. Here's the story: so after school, I was just chilling and I saw a classmate walk by. Let's call her HB Alisa. She's a good 7/10 and has a very nice body. I always thought she was into me; she would give me massages and always touch me. Anyway, we started talking, and she invited me to go to the 3rd floor to work on a project. We were alone. For the first 30 minutes, I think I was pretty smooth, and she laughed everything I said. I noticed that she was twirling her hair and glancing at my lips. So I thought: this girl's mine. We played truth or truth, and i was talking about my goals, and brought up hooking up with a girl before next year and asked her if she wanted to complete it. She said if she knew me better. I have gotten that same response around 10 times in the past, by many girls who seemed attracted to me. I tried again 30 minutes later, and this time she said that she was sick. I thought bs. She explained that she wanted to focus on school and stuff, but she was still staring into my eyes deeply. I couldn't lean in to kiss her because she was sitting on the ground, so far away, and I couldn't use much kino either. I was thinking about this thread and I just couldn't remember what to do in a situation like this. I decided to leave, and stood up. She gave me a tight hug and wouldn't let go while saying she's sorry for disappointing me. I decided to try one more time and told her to give me a quick kiss. She said she'd give me one on the cheek. So she leaned in, and I turned my head and she kissed me on the lips. I think it was a pretty dumb way, but nerveless, I'm still happy I got one.

 

[Anima]

This wouldn't leave me satisfied or proud of myself, but I give you props for getting further than I ever have (and closer, too). If I were you, I'd scratch that off and go for one that was mutual and earned (maybe even sexual or leading to?). Just use the experience for your next "first".

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

Thanks for the honest answer Ruler. I knew I made mistakes but, I was just confused as to what they were. Im just realizing how desperate I was and she probably kissed me because I had asked so many times. I was just horny as hell, NoFap has been tough.

However the only reason I remained persistent is that she was still kinoing heavily and even held my hand. She responded well to my sexual comments as well.

 

[devilkingx2]

TL;DR/overall verdict: this girl sounds like a tease unless she's shy... but giving you massages and touching you a lot doesn't sound like shy introverted behavior...

Today I'm pretty happy because I got a kiss, but it wasn't in a way that I wanted.

progress is progress.

I always thought she was into me; she would give me massages and always touch me.

unless she does that to everyone. if she doesn't that's a very good sign.

I noticed that she was twirling her hair and glancing at my lips. So I thought: this girl's mine.

the former is probably meaningless despited its often touted meaning. the latter makes more sense as a good sign.

We played truth or truth, and i was talking about my goals, and brought up hooking up with a girl before next year and asked her if she wanted to complete it.

don't you mean truth or dare? and that's not the kinda thing you tell girls about... though i have pretty much the same goal. that basically screams "I want to hit and quit it" or "I don't want you, I want to get laid and that just happens to be possible with you" or something like that.

She said if she knew me better.

I can't tell if that's a blow off or a good response.

I have gotten that same response around 10 times in the past, by many girls who seemed attracted to me. [/QUOTE]

did it ever actually go well? cuz this will likely go the same way... duh lol.

I tried again 30 minutes later, and this time she said that she was sick. I thought bs. She explained that she wanted to focus on school and stuff, but she was still staring into my eyes deeply.

you thought right. neither of those are good things. this girl sounds like a giant tease.

I couldn't lean in to kiss her because she was sitting on the ground, so far away, and I couldn't use much kino either.

why wouldn't you be next to her... like duh lol.

I was thinking about this thread and I just couldn't remember what to do in a situation like this. I decided to leave, and stood up. She gave me a tight hug and wouldn't let go while saying she's sorry for disappointing me.

this girl sounds like a really annoying tease. but that's my humble/honest opinion

So she leaned in, and I turned my head and she kissed me on the lips. I think it was a pretty dumb way, but nerveless, I'm still happy I got one.

not such a great idea, if she wanted to kiss you you could've just kissed her, if she didn't she won't be too thrilled about that.

 

[miketan70]

You got here some comments and have them in mind next time

 

[Highschoolkidzz]

Today I'm pretty happy because I got a kiss, but it wasn't in a way that I wanted. Here's the story: so after school, I was just chilling and I saw a classmate walk by. Let's call her HB Alisa. She's a good 7/10 and has a very nice body. I always thought she was into me; she would give me massages and always touch me. Anyway, we started talking, and she invited me to go to the 3rd floor to work on a project. We were alone. For the first 30 minutes, I think I was pretty smooth, and she laughed everything I said. I noticed that she was twirling her hair and glancing at my lips. So I thought: this girl's mine. We played truth or truth, and i was talking about my goals, and brought up hooking up with a girl before next year and asked her if she wanted to complete it. She said if she knew me better. I have gotten that same response around 10 times in the past, by many girls who seemed attracted to me. I tried again 30 minutes later, and this time she said that she was sick. I thought bs. She explained that she wanted to focus on school and stuff, but she was still staring into my eyes deeply. I couldn't lean in to kiss her because she was sitting on the ground, so far away, and I couldn't use much kino either. I was thinking about this thread and I just couldn't remember what to do in a situation like this. I decided to leave, and stood up. She gave me a tight hug and wouldn't let go while saying she's sorry for disappointing me. I decided to try one more time and told her to give me a quick kiss. She said she'd give me one on the cheek. So she leaned in, and I turned my head and she kissed me on the lips. I think it was a pretty dumb way, but nerveless, I'm still happy I got one

Hey Bro!

Haha great job dont sweat it too much. You found a girl who LIKES you so she will actually forgive you for many things. In fact you do not really have to be perfect if a girl likes you cause at that point you almost finished the job. Just try to be alone with her again and ramp it up and kiss her. Be very touchy and if she is in the mood that day then you can finish up.

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

From now on, I think I will never directly ask a girl to hook up. i should just do it. I think I am too scared to just initiate it randomly, although I would have no problem if it is consensual. I have used the same strategy of asking a girl straight up if she wanted to hook up many times, and generally I got the same answer. "Only If I knew you better." i feel like being this direct drives them away, and kills the mysterious, unpredictable vibe I'm supposed to maintain. What are your opinions on this?

 

[Anima]

From now on, I think I will never directly ask a girl to hook up. i should just do it. I think I am too scared to just initiate it randomly, although I would have no problem if it is consensual. I have used the same strategy of asking a girl straight up if she wanted to hook up many times, and generally I got the same answer. "Only If I knew you better." i feel like being this direct drives them away, and kills the mysterious, unpredictable vibe I'm supposed to maintain. What are your opinions on this?

That's pretty much what I was trying to get across. Give it a shot and let us know how it goes. Good luck.

 

[No.Danny]

It's simple, you're desperate I can tell through your words. Learn to enjoy the moment instead of being outcome dependent. You don't have to get a kiss or anything just build the attraction. Sexual tension is a great tool

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

Thanks, great learning experience here.

 

[Huffman]

Aspiring Don Juan,

first of all congratulations on your "success", and well done for having the guts to do something, anything.

However, I must hammer one thing into your head: you did the wrong thing, this is NOT the way to go about it. You must not think too fondly of that kiss - it was the Kiss of Death. You got rejected.

You ever heard about positive reinforcement? If you feel so happy about this kiss - your brain will unconsciously make you do the same actions again next time, because it made you feel good.

This is the wrong way. Keep this in mind next time. Feel good about yourself, when you got laid.

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

That makes a lot of sense, thanks man. I'm just glad I had the confidence to even try anything. I've been in a situation like this earlier this year, only I just sat there trying to persuade myself to do something, but I was able to do this, surprisingly easily. Fvck though... she's such a fking tease if you're right. I hate girls like that. They flirt with you then deny all advances, it's happened to me before. Only this time, she didn't say no straight up and let me believe there was still a chance. Whatever, this is all practice to me, and a great learning experience: to not be so outcome dependent. Thanks people!

 

[Huffman]

One more thing: one day you will understand why girls flirt but then drop you. It takes alot of character and strength to say NO straigt away.

Imagine: You are moderately good at this. You are at a bar. A girl approaches you. She's kinda cute but too fat. Your interest is not high, but it feels good to be approached. She makes you feel attractive. You respect her braveness, and it would be cruel to send her away. So you start flirting "just a little". You feel confident, don't really want her anyway, just playing a game. After all you're being "nice" to her, right? Finally, she asks your number. You consider for a second, then reject her. Then you feel bad about it.

This is what girls are doing to you. It makes alot of sense actually. You will understand once you improved a bit, and once you are the one who gives out the rejections.

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

Very true Huffman, never thought of it that way, however I have much bigger issues to worry about right now. So apparently, she bent the story and told her friends that she said No firmly, then I kissed her. So, yea every girl in the grade hates me and thinks I'm a rapist lmao. The guys believe me because I told them before this all blew up but I don't know what to do. They think I'm some sort of rapist now

 

[devilkingx2]

Very true Huffman, never thought of it that way, however I have much bigger issues to worry about right now. So apparently, she bent the story and told her friends that she said No firmly, then I kissed her. So, yea every girl in the grade hates me and thinks I'm a rapist lmao. The guys believe me because I told them before this all blew up but I don't know what to do. They think I'm some sort of rapist now

if you get a girl to like you(like like), she'll believe you, the girls who aren't her friends and don't dislike you will be possible to turn around to either your side or neutrality. the rest of the girls(her friends and your enemies) are irrelevant

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

Lmao, this whole thing blew over in about 1 day. People believe me now, and think she's over reacting. But the main reason they believe her, is that they don't think I was capable of what she described in her story. Hearing this kind of frustrated me, and made me realize that people, don't really believe in my capabilities with girls. It annoys me, but there's nothing I can change about their perception.

 

[Huffman]

Just keep going, and keep getting experience. As long as you go out there, stuff will eventually come together.