What am I doing wrong?

[captain55]

Im a big muscular good looking guy. I get hot women to go out on dates with me all the time but I feel like if I can't get in the girls pants within the first night it usually never happens so I have learned to be successful with women by escalating quickly.

I am EXTREMELY good with first impressions...getting numbers, approaching women, getting women to go out with me and getting them interested is my STRENGTH. They respond positively to my aggressive attitude and I project my sexual energy onto them very well. Its not uncommon for chicks with boyfriends to be sending me pictures after meeting them in supermarkets for example. Its also not uncommon for me to meet a girl at the gym, or out somewhere and have an hour conversation with her, and then after the first actual date she loses interest in me.

What am I doing wrong here? Its almost as if my frame of mind switches once I get past that initial close and I become somebody else

 

[Brad]

I’m guessing that you’re giving off a vibe that says “I want to be sexual with you” initially.

After that if they don’t get sex they lose interest.

It could be that they’re projecting what kind of guy they want you to be then when they actually meet you they realise you’re not some ideal.

Keep at it man. Sounds like you’ve got the initial game down. During the date keep very observant. Watch her when you say something to see how she reacts. Think about what subconscious signals you’re sending on that first approach and how your communication differs on the first date.

Keep it light and fun on the first date too.

 

[captain55]

I’m guessing that you’re giving off a vibe that says “I want to be sexual with you” initially.

After that if they don’t get sex they lose interest.

It could be that they’re projecting what kind of guy they want you to be then when they actually meet you they realise you’re not some ideal.

Keep at it man. Sounds like you’ve got the initial game down. During the date keep very observant. Watch her when you say something to see how she reacts. Think about what subconscious signals you’re sending on that first approach and how your communication differs on the first date.

Keep it light and fun on the first date too.

Exactly. If i can bang her i can get her to want a relationship with me....it’s getting her to get sexual with me after the first date. I try being talkative and leading the conversation..i should say that coffeee dates and dinner dates are the hardest for me. Drinks i never have any problems

 

[wifehunter]

Stop trying so hard, and let things happen. Grip too hard, and things fall through your fingers. You will lose frame.

Shift your energy away from women.

 

[exhausted]

Going for first date sex is creepy and disturbing honestly.
I have 3 sisters, I've been told a stranger attempting that gets canned immediately for many reasons it puts off.
And if a guy gets physically intimidating i get briefed on the situation to take care of it.

 

[Southbound29]

Stop trying so hard, and let things happen. Grip too hard, and things fall through your fingers. You will lose frame.

Shift your energy away from women.

This x100. I catch myself doing the same thing. I'm always working on my frame and getting better. Just keep at it.

 

[exhausted]

It's not "creepy and disturbing", but it's not a decent repeatable standard of game to filter women through either.

Both of those are extreme.

I find 3 to 5 dates is a good standard. Sets a limit for investing in one woman, keeps strong intent whilst giving comfort, filters for good interest, etc etc etc.

Longer than that, and i've found problems.

From some sets that i've had: girl turned out to already have a fvck-buddy, girl had low-interest, girl was trying to leverage sex as too much of a power thing, girl had other issues, and so on so forth.

As my 3 sisters have said, when on a first date with what is essentially a stranger, it is creepy and disturbing when a guy is pushing for that in any way.
Therefore from the opinion of women who aren't *****s that is how they feel.

 

[exhausted]

I've had first date sex a few times.

Whose experience do you think I prioritize, mine or what your sisters spout off? That's no authority at all.

Misconceptions:

1. Women don't want quick sex
2. Escalating for it under any circumstances is "creepy and disturbing in any way"
3. Women that do this have less worth
4. Men that do this have less worth

For the love of god let's start talking male experiences on this forum, not what your sister, mum, female friend, or beexcellent said to you.

Oh i understand. I'v had plenty of ons as well.

But you said " its not creepy or disturbing " and i just replied the opinions of some women are that it is. Not just my sisters but a few friends have said that.

Having female insight allows us men to be guided better. Goes together.

I dont want an ltr or marriage with a woman who lets me or other men plow her on the first date. Just my preference to have a quality woman.

 

[Von]

For a woman its only creepy if she doesnt want you.

Why she might not want you:
Its your vibe

I did alot of "1 date go for the lay" its worked super well as i was funny and laid bac. It was comfortable for her and me

I was passing the enjoyment and good time first and above my "need"

Deesade covered it all.

Girls dont want to feel pressured, they don't like pushy... because it screams à thirst and a lack from the guy that is unattractive to the girls.

Like a saleman you feel is pushing you to buy the most expensive thing he has to offer because he needs the $$$$... the client will be freaking out.

Patience, Control, unneedyness (called also abundance) will you... develop à sensé of humour and keep your frame.

Likely you project something and you dont deliver the same image when you are àt the 2nd impression level. I had the same problem... it's usually coming from à lack of confidence, à void, narcissim or simply not knowing yourself enough or worst fighting it.


You wrote "If i can bang her i can get her to want a relationship with me.."

Do you realize how pushy? Needy? Self-absorbed? Controlfreak?.. it reads and sound.

Its not because you sleeping with her you'll get a LTR.

If you want to sleep with a girl, you need to go on dates with her and make her feel good,secure,amused and in confidence with you.

If the girl feel you want to force her it something she doesnt want to do... good luck.

Its about Leading her and leading can be subtle.

Its not easy, take work... heck I am with my current GF learning about the leading/bossy/pushy/lead mentality and how sometimes being subtle is more efficient than confrontational (which is something i am naturally)

Learn to Master yourself, learn to feed her will leading her to your Want

 

[QuadDeuces]

You care too much.

 

[wifehunter]

 

[Trump]

As my 3 sisters have said, when on a first date with what is essentially a stranger, it is creepy and disturbing when a guy is pushing for that in any way.
Therefore from the opinion of women who aren't *****s that is how they feel.

As my 3 girl cousins have said, when on a first date, it is creepy and disturbing when a guy does not push for it in anyway.

Come on bro, for a guy with THREE sisters, you should know what women say is not reality, its only good for their image.

 

[derby1]

this thread stinks of listening to a woman for advice

A WOMAN DOES NOT REALISE THE DIFFERENCE between WHAT she THINKS she WANTS and what her Sub Concious Body wants

ie dated a girl a while back she told me how cute it was when a guy *Hugs and *kisses on the cheek...but interestingly these guys never got any distance out of her i know one he said he dropped her off home after the date

i got this girl outside hand on side of neck and lightly bit her bottom lip escalated to full on kiss and welcomed her to come back to drinks at mine( IE I WILL **** YOU HARD)

its how you do things with woman YOU PLANT SEEDS and let there mind do the work your either reading or giving out signals wrong

 

[exhausted]

As my 3 girl cousins have said, when on a first date, it is creepy and disturbing when a guy does not push for it in anyway.

Come on bro, for a guy with THREE sisters, you should know what women say is not reality, its only good for their image.

Fuch off

 

[exhausted]

As my 3 girl cousins have said, when on a first date, it is creepy and disturbing when a guy does not push for it in anyway.

Come on bro, for a guy with THREE sisters, you should know what women say is not reality, its only good for their image.

Come on bro for a human being you should know there are no absolutes.

A family friend of ours growing up was raped on a first date at 17 years old.

So fuch off to some other world where not everyone lacks morals and were actually raised by good parents with God in mind.

For gods sakes there is ALWAYS someone having to interject themselves to fuchin argue.

My oldest sister has bpd and is bipolar, a heart of gold despite mental issues. She has behaved in ways in front of me that show the opposite of keeping a good image.


Like i said fuch off.


Its not hard. Some women dont want a strangers **** in them the first day they meet.

How is this unheardof??????????????

I'm at the end of my rope. I'm ready to get down. It's time.
FUCH OFF

 

[exhausted]

People are absolutely unreal.

I have 3 sisters who are my best friends.
I'v seen one go thro hell her ebtire life being bipolar.
The other lived thro a suicide attemot and depression.
The third thank God is wonderful.
Ive raised a kid entirely alone 18 years. I've been at the point of jumping off a building.
I found my dad dead 4 years ago.
We buried him.
He was my best friend. I wanted to bury myself.
As siblings we hav been thro hell and back together.

Yet this ****ing stranger is telling me what my 3 sisters said was fake for their image!!!!!!????????!!!!!!


Hahahahaha
People he has never met or talked to but he know everything. Their thoughts and their souls.

FUCH OFF
You are a damn fool.

 

[ubercat]

I'm really sorry man. That's a tough road for anyone. And I totally agree nobody here should be saying anything about anyone's family.

 

[ubercat]

The other interesting question is should we be better than that. I've slept with plenty of girls on a first date. And they were into it it certainly wasn't pressure from me. But from what I've seen down the track that isn't good for them. Personally I wouldn't do it anymore.

Remember this is a guy in his 50s talking. As I said I've done it many times I'm in no position to throw the first stone.

 

[exhausted]

The other interesting question is should we be better than that. I've slept with plenty of girls on a first date. And they were into it it certainly wasn't pressure from me. But from what I've seen down the track that isn't good for them. Personally I wouldn't do it anymore.

Remember this is a guy in his 50s talking. As I said I've done it many times I'm in no position to throw the first stone.

I understand there are some girls out there banging like *****s on first dates. My point is quality souls Dont do that and are creeped out by what is essentially a stranger trying to fuch them.
I have had plenty one night stands but never a first date bang as i dont go for them. Maybe i like to build it up a bit and i feel superficial going for first date sex. Sex is eady to get with *****s a quality eoman is hard to find

But mr know it all told me what my sisters thoughts feelings and souls represent like a fuchin moron. Fuch him.

That alone was enough stupidity.

Here is the cheat sheet.

Quality women who have pride for their souls dont bang strangers on a first dat. Period.

People have diseases and are horrible human beings. No self respecting girl plows strangers.

 

[exhausted]

But suicidal and bipolar women do. Why be so self-righteous about it, you actually expect men here to take your word for it?

Like i said there are no absolutes

My 2 sisters for sure have issues but they have good souls and a connection to my parents and God, for them a first date stranger trying to have cex is a turnoff.
Thats all i know.

Except that guy told me whats really in my sisters hearts and souls like an *******.

Btw i have a few friends that are girls say the same thing. Then i have others who are *****s. No absolutes is all