Were you disappointed when you found out what women are really like?

[CasanovaFrankenstein]

And what they really look for in a guy, and how they really weed out the ones they're not interested in? When you found out that you probably won't snag yourself a great woman by just "being yourself" (at least not if that "self" includes certain AFC traits)? Did you ever find it depressing that the Hollywood cliche of the HB choosing the "nice guy" over the "jerk" is most times just the opposite of reality? And that bringing a woman candy and flowers and being sweet and doing things that make her and her friends go "awwww" won't even get you as much of her attention as the puppy who makes her go "awwww"? I see that the Matrix analogy is popular here. Is it a common reaction when a life-long AFC is confronted with what the seduction community says women are really like, that he doesn't want to believe it and wishes he had taken the blue pill? How many of you here have gone through that? If you ever found it disappointing, even depressing, do you still?

 

[Sandow]

It was more eye opening than anything else. And when I learned about it, it all made sense as to why i was failing with girls. In fact i think it's the opposite of depressing, I have so much more confidence and game than ever before. Because we understand attraction now, there is no reason to get depressed, you should be more optimistic.

There's nothing disappointing about it. Its just how the law of attraction works.

 

[Furyguy]

I see that the Matrix analogy is popular here. Is it a common reaction when a life-long AFC is confronted with what the seduction community says women are really like, that he doesn't want to believe it and wishes he had taken the blue pill? How many of you here have gone through that? If you ever found it disappointing, even depressing, do you still?

Yeah I had that eye-opening experience.

Want to know what was a thousand times worse? A life of constant miserable failure with absolutely no idea why and no HOPE of it ever getting better. Ignorance is not always bliss. I'd rather see the light, even if it is a bit blinding and painful at first, than to live forever in darkness.


See the thing about your analogy is that Neo always knew there was something wrong with the world, something that just didn't click or fit or make sense, like a splinter in your brain that just digs and nags and you can never get at it or make the pain go away. I have had that same malignancy most of my life, and finally removing it was amazing. I always wondered what was wrong with me and why I just couldn't seem to do any better. Now that I know, I can fix it.

I would never wish to go "Blue Pill," to be ignorant again. Is it disappointing to know that fairytales don't come true? That the *******s often win? That a lot of people are selfish, greedy, callous, uncaring, and uninterested? Of course, man. But I'll gladly take that knowledge over ignorance any day.

 

[AirborneDoc82ndABN]

Casanova,

Definitely man. My enlightenment took place largely in my teens, when I would spend HOURS and HOURS talking to girls and would somehow manage to always just be the friend they talked to about their boyfriend and asked for advice. I think I was maybe 17 when I stumbled upon this site while searching online for "Nice guys" or something like that.

Now here I am at 24 still reading stories on here. I have been in 3 long term (1 year or more) relationships and probably 15 non serious fling/friends with benefits deals. I still find the site very informative, and it is a very valuable tool in terms of helping you bust out of a rut, or to keep the girl once you get her.

But yeah this site has done nothing but help. I will admit though, at times I can only take it in small doses due to the amount of "attacking" that takes place when a younger or older AFC hasn't seen the light yet.

 

[slaog]

I wasn't disappointed I was delighted. Everything made sense after a while. I could finally understand women more clearly instead of going after women blindly and getting nowhere.

 

[WC2]

Most are disappointed when they find out because they are in a bad situation.

The majority of the people who join this forum either A) Just went through a breakup or B) Just failed on a woman

It's failure that attracts people to this thread, so through their failures they find out the glaring truth.

Imagine if you stumbled upon this when you were on great terms with your girl friend or whatever. You wouldn't believe any of this crap for a second! Your mind never wants to believe what it doesn't want to.

Sadly it's our biggest failures that give us the most growth.

I was disappointed when I found out what women are really like. But shortly after I felt empowered. 4 years later, I can't imagine approaching women any other way.

Let the doormats continue to let women walk all over them, while the other men lay women down like the doormats they once thought we were.

 

[jafyk]

In a sense I was disappointed to learn that all the things that we supposedly do to be "nice" to women were the wrong things to do. Especially because I like to treat people how I'd like for them to treat me.
On the flipside it was a relief to know why the things I had been doing in the past had been failing and that there's a site like this that teaches guys what the well meaning people in your life and your teachers at school can't teach you. The hard part is that once you know the truth it becomes your responsibility to act on it. The good thing is this site offers you some tools in the form of advice. I just wish I had known all this a while back. I was a virgin until I was 24 never had a gf until last year and that lasted 2 weeks. My 2nd girlfriend lasted 7 months and I broke up with her because she was cheating on me. I don't know how my brother who is 10 years younger than me stumbled across this site. Although we don't get along much, this site is the best thing he's done for me.

 

[CapCrunch]

Not really, it just leveled the playing field for me. We too weed out chicks only that we do it based on looks rather than niceness or confidence.

The movie thing was kinda of a downer though jeje but still, if i had to do it again i would take the red pill in a heart beat.

 

[Playboy]

And what they really look for in a guy, and how they really weed out the ones they're not interested in? When you found out that you probably won't snag yourself a great woman by just "being yourself" (at least not if that "self" includes certain AFC traits)? Did you ever find it depressing that the Hollywood cliche of the HB choosing the "nice guy" over the "jerk" is most times just the opposite of reality? And that bringing a woman candy and flowers and being sweet and doing things that make her and her friends go "awwww" won't even get you as much of her attention as the puppy who makes her go "awwww"? I see that the Matrix analogy is popular here. Is it a common reaction when a life-long AFC is confronted with what the seduction community says women are really like, that he doesn't want to believe it and wishes he had taken the blue pill? How many of you here have gone through that? If you ever found it disappointing, even depressing, do you still?

At first it is, but at some point you get past the bitterness and exaggeration that tends to get spewed at you when you enter the community. If you can weed yourself off the forums where noobs that are freshly brainwashed and bitter and angry tend to lurk -- you can eventually evolve a more mature, sophisticated, non-judgemental -- and more importantly balanced, calibrated, and experienced view of the whole thing.

In short. I had a nice looking girl with me for a long long time. How did I get her to hang with me again after I sucked in bed? A rose in her car. She was tired of jerks that didn't care about her. We were together a long time. She learned that I was good in bed. In fact she STAYED with me despite the fact I turned totally unattractive on her, for YEARS, because she was such a good and loyal person.

Women are not the cold calculating nitches that angry men would like to make them out to be. Women are not the cold calculating nitches that guys trying to sell you product by convincing you that you are BROKEN -- want you to believe. Women are not the cold calculating nitches that fear motivated men on forums tend to project on them. Oh and by the way -- you can replace all the n's with b's that are in front of "itches". =->

It's just that women -- to appreciate you -- must be ATTRACTED to you. So these other things don't make you attractive unless you are ALREADY attractive to her in some "other" ways that speak to her core as a woman. Being upsett with them for that is like if I came on here and ragged on you for not ****ing a 300 pound woman because she was nice to you. Do you guys GET that?

It doesn't make her cold. It doesn't make her calculative. It makes her a woman, and if you want to learn how to have more sex with women -- you damn well better learn how to accept them for who they are and drop the bitterness and hate -- because if you have issues with women you won't be getting any women unless you are rich, famous, or a model -- and even then you wont hold onto them for very long at all.

Let me tell you guys straight out right now. If you go around hating women, they will affirm your reality because they will F-U-C-K_ing take you for a ride (no not the good kind of ride) and do things to you that are so evil and so manipulative that you will WISH YOU WERE DEAD -- or perhaps gay. This will only confirm your hate, and the cycle will never end. Good luck.

 

[KontrollerX]

Having been programmed with a lie for so long I'm not sure the dissapointment for most of us brainwashed with it will ever fully go away. Sites like this help ease the sadness about it quite a bit though thankfully with the light of truth and support from our fellow man.

No one here hates women, no not really, not at the core of their being, not like a certain pvssified male in this thread and other feminist symp-athizers out there would have you believe but what we do hate is having been lied to for so long by parents, teachers and society that women were a certain way and to be handled a certain way and finding out that this was completely wrong and we go on to have these implanted expectations in us not of our own making completely shattered bringing us a great deal of pain and dissapointment.

Any anger lies with whoever brainwashed us with this lie not actually at women though sometimes misguided posters here may think their anger is with women.

When they do a little more digging and soul searching however they find out their anger was never with women but the ones who lied to them while growing up setting them up for massive failure.

Weak males like the unnamed gentleman above me in the thread grow up to become feminist symp-athizer teachers and parents and continue the cycle of manipulation, degradation and destruction of masculinity in the western boy that too sets him up for failure and to carry on where his b!tch of a father left off.

The only cure for this is for the real men to stand up and say no more, unite together and spread information about what it means to be a real man, raise their sons to be real men and then make a powerful unapologetic statement to the western world that being a real man with positive masculinity is an ok and healthy thing to be.

 

[Nutz]

Disillusionment is probably the best way to explain how I felt. I figured some women fell for guys that played them and others were too smart for that. Now I know better and have shed the veil of social programming and see things for what they are. Attraction isn't a choice and if you hit the right attraction switches, even if you're a dirtbag, you can pretty much bag any woman you want if that's your thing.

 

[penkitten]

as silly as you might find this, even us gals do grow up and at some point, most of us have even been a little disappointed. let me explain...

we were all told that becoming a woman was the most wonderful thing that would ever happen to us. (oh, the lies! the horror!)
it all starts at birth. our parents constantly tell us how beautiful we are, even if we are dog ugly. most parents don't tell their little girls how smart they are or witty or clever or fast , just pretty.
when we are little they hand us little plastic cooking crap and pretend makeup and tiny purses and princess dressups and we are told fairy tales about happily ever afters.
then we get older and we are told that one day we will become women and it will be spectacular!
so by the time we are 12, we are wearing these over the shoulder boulder holders and sporting maxi pads and chopping midol to deal with the cramps and it is supposed to be spectacular alright.
and since we were all taught the same fairy tales and put right up on the pedestals without anything to cushion the blow ... it is usually downright disappointing to find out that real womanhood if much different.
some of us gals can learn to appreciate what it really means to be a woman, and we come to terms with it. we must work hard at what we do, especially once we become wives and mothers too.
however, there will always be a ton of women around that never will come to terms with it. they will always feel they are on the pedestal they were placed on so long ago, not allowing themselves to fall off. (eff em and the horse they road in on, huh?)
those type of women seem like old little girls filled with drama and blame for others. they never realize that other people have feelings and that the world truly doesn't revolve around them. they think they are extra special to themselves.

when you find women that can both endure the wrath of womanhood and learn to enjoy it for all that it is , you will find that those women have more patience with love and virtue.

same goes for guys, some men never grow up to be men, they just stay big guys forever without embracing what manhood is all about.

 

[Juan_Man]

I want to know what the guys here think is the key to maintaining a successful relationship with a woman? Do you even look for LTRs anymore or do you simply just date as many women as possible without getting attached?

 

[Playboy]

Having been programmed with a lie for so long I'm not sure the dissapointment for most of us brainwashed with it will ever fully go away. Sites like this help ease the sadness about it quite a bit though thankfully with the light of truth and support from our fellow man.

No one here hates women, no not really, not at the core of their being, not like a certain pvssified male in this thread and other feminist symp-athizers out there would have you believe but what we do hate is having been lied to for so long by parents, teachers and society that women were a certain way and to be handled a certain way and finding out that this was completely wrong and we go on to have these implanted expectations in us not of our own making completely shattered bringing us a great deal of pain and dissapointment.

Any anger lies with whoever brainwashed us with this lie not actually at women though sometimes misguided posters here may think their anger is with women.

When they do a little more digging and soul searching however they find out their anger was never with women but the ones who lied to them while growing up setting them up for massive failure.

Weak males like the unnamed gentleman above me in the thread grow up to become feminist symp-athizer teachers and parents and continue the cycle of manipulation, degradation and destruction of masculinity in the western boy that too sets him up for failure and to carry on where his b!tch of a father left off.

The only cure for this is for the real men to stand up and say no more, unite together and spread information about what it means to be a real man, raise their sons to be real men and then make a powerful unapologetic statement to the western world that being a real man with positive masculinity is an ok and healthy thing to be.

LMAO!! Wow you really outdid yourself with this last post man. A for effort dude!

You know -- if it's any consellation broseph, I don't think that you hate women, not at all. I think you just hate yourself. Im not here to knock you though man, I'm on YOUR TEAM. Go get em' champ. :cheer:

 

[Playboy]

I want to know what the guys here think is the key to maintaining a successful relationship with a woman? Do you even look for LTRs anymore or do you simply just date as many women as possible without getting attached?

Well I had an HB8 for 5 years.

Here are a few tips:

1) You have to keep it spontaneous and not settle into any sort of comfort zone. This doesn't need to be difficult. Something as simple as throwing her up against the wall when she gets home from work, picking her up over your shoulder, throwing her on the bed and dominating the ever living **** out of her out of nowhere is a start. You can think of all kinds of adventurous spontaneous things that don't necessarily need to be too elaborate if your creative enough.

2) When a woman needs her space you give it to her. If she gets distant or emotional, or is going through some shyt -- just let her be. Don't try to fix it. Do your own thing, have your OWN shyt going on. Your time is too important for it and it's NOT YOUR FAULT.

3) Stay attractive, stay strong, and be a man. She has to feel safe with you. If she begins viewing you as a child or as weak she cannot feel safe or trust you, her attraction will fade.

4) You don't have to be unattached, not at all. Just make sure that you care about the relationship equally or LESS than she does. You have to also be less REACTIVE than she is.

5) Women will try to change you. They want to be first -- but if you let them be first all the time then they will lose their attraction for you. Again -- Have your own shyt going on. Yes should be less common than no.

6) DOn't always be giving her advice. Sometimes women want to vent on you like your an emotional tampon. If it's really important to her listen, say awww and give her a hug, and move onto other things. Do not get caught up in the drama, that's for her girlfriends. Do not try to be her shrink or offer solutions. She doesn't want solutions, she just wants to vent and be understood.

The whole one-itis and date a lot of different women mentality is for guys that lack confidence to have confidence and have a lot of options and shyt going on. The idea is that they will then come off the way they need to by default. When you and a woman have been seeing eachother for a while, and if you feel like she is the type of girl who you can see yourself sharing your life experiences with -- then there is nothing wrong with getting more serious with her -- PROVIDED -- you continue to follow those 6 things I outlined.

 

[KontrollerX]

"LMAO!! Wow you really outdid yourself with this last post man. A for effort dude!"

I'm the second best poster on the site.

What can I say?

"You know -- if it's any consellation broseph, I don't think that you hate women, not at all.

I think you just hate yourself."

First he insults.

"Im not here to knock you though man"

Then he claims he doesn't insult.

It'd be nice if you could get your opinion of me straight man.

Take me for example...I've never waivered in my opinion of you as being a pvssy.

I don't backtrack and then say oh no I don't actually think you are a pvssy.

No with me its full steam ahead.

You are a pvssy.

See? It feels good to be honest.

"I'm on YOUR TEAM. Go get em' champ."

No sir.

You are squarely on team AFC.

I got traded from that team years ago to Team DJ.

Maybe someday you will make it to the better team and come on board for the big win but for now you are in the bush leagues and don't appear to be leaving anytime soon.

 

[KingBeef]

At first it is, but at some point you get past the bitterness and exaggeration that tends to get spewed at you when you enter the community. If you can weed yourself off the forums where noobs that are freshly brainwashed and bitter and angry tend to lurk -- you can eventually evolve a more mature, sophisticated, non-judgemental -- and more importantly balanced, calibrated, and experienced view of the whole thing.

In short. I had a nice looking girl with me for a long long time. How did I get her to hang with me again after I sucked in bed? A rose in her car. She was tired of jerks that didn't care about her. We were together a long time. She learned that I was good in bed. In fact she STAYED with me despite the fact I turned totally unattractive on her, for YEARS, because she was such a good and loyal person.

Women are not the cold calculating nitches that angry men would like to make them out to be. Women are not the cold calculating nitches that guys trying to sell you product by convincing you that you are BROKEN -- want you to believe. Women are not the cold calculating nitches that fear motivated men on forums tend to project on them. Oh and by the way -- you can replace all the n's with b's that are in front of "itches". =->

It's just that women -- to appreciate you -- must be ATTRACTED to you. So these other things don't make you attractive unless you are ALREADY attractive to her in some "other" ways that speak to her core as a woman. Being upsett with them for that is like if I came on here and ragged on you for not ****ing a 300 pound woman because she was nice to you. Do you guys GET that?

It doesn't make her cold. It doesn't make her calculative. It makes her a woman, and if you want to learn how to have more sex with women -- you damn well better learn how to accept them for who they are and drop the bitterness and hate -- because if you have issues with women you won't be getting any women unless you are rich, famous, or a model -- and even then you wont hold onto them for very long at all.

Let me tell you guys straight out right now. If you go around hating women, they will affirm your reality because they will F-U-C-K_ing take you for a ride (no not the good kind of ride) and do things to you that are so evil and so manipulative that you will WISH YOU WERE DEAD -- or perhaps gay. This will only confirm your hate, and the cycle will never end. Good luck.

Well said

 

[Playboy]

"LMAO!! Wow you really outdid yourself with this last post man. A for effort dude!"

I'm the second best poster on the site.

What can I say?

"You know -- if it's any consellation broseph, I don't think that you hate women, not at all.

I think you just hate yourself."

First he insults.

"Im not here to knock you though man"

Then he claims he doesn't insult.

It'd be nice if you could get your opinion of me straight man.

Take me for example...I've never waivered in my opinion of you as being a pvssy.

I don't backtrack and then say oh no I don't actually think you are a pvssy.

No with me its full steam ahead.

You are a pvssy.

See? It feels good to be honest.

"I'm on YOUR TEAM. Go get em' champ."

No sir.

You are squarely on team AFC.

I got traded from that team years ago to Team DJ.

Maybe someday you will make it to the better team and come on board for the big win but for now you are in the bush leagues and don't appear to be leaving anytime soon.

I'm sorry -- are you still rambling??

I gotta give you this man, you really do try hard. Oh and I almost forgot -- congrats on being the boards second best poster, Im proud of you man.

 

[Juan_Man]

Well I had an HB8 for 5 years.

Here are a few tips:

1) You have to keep it spontaneous and not settle into any sort of comfort zone. This doesn't need to be difficult. Something as simple as throwing her up against the wall when she gets home from work, picking her up over your shoulder, throwing her on the bed and dominating the ever living **** out of her out of nowhere is a start. You can think of all kinds of adventurous spontaneous things that don't necessarily need to be too elaborate if your creative enough.

2) When a woman needs her space you give it to her. If she gets distant or emotional, or is going through some shyt -- just let her be. Don't try to fix it. Do your own thing, have your OWN shyt going on. Your time is too important for it and it's NOT YOUR FAULT.

3) Stay attractive, stay strong, and be a man. She has to feel safe with you. If she begins viewing you as a child or as weak she cannot feel safe or trust you, her attraction will fade.

4) You don't have to be unattached, not at all. Just make sure that you care about the relationship equally or LESS than she does. You have to also be less REACTIVE than she is.

5) Women will try to change you. They want to be first -- but if you let them be first all the time then they will lose their attraction for you. Again -- Have your own shyt going on. Yes should be less common than no.

6) DOn't always be giving her advice. Sometimes women want to vent on you like your an emotional tampon. If it's really important to her listen, say awww and give her a hug, and move onto other things. Do not get caught up in the drama, that's for her girlfriends. Do not try to be her shrink or offer solutions. She doesn't want solutions, she just wants to vent and be understood.

The whole one-itis and date a lot of different women mentality is for guys that lack confidence to have confidence and have a lot of options and shyt going on. The idea is that they will then come off the way they need to by default. When you and a woman have been seeing eachother for a while, and if you feel like she is the type of girl who you can see yourself sharing your life experiences with -- then there is nothing wrong with getting more serious with her -- PROVIDED -- you continue to follow those 6 things I outlined.

Good advice. Much obliged. However, this advice does not seem to be any different from the advice already given by others on this site. So why do you assume that we all hate women?

 

[Playboy]

Good advice. Much obliged. However, this advice does not seem to be any different from the advice already given by others in this site. So why do you assume that we all hate women?

I'm sure ALL of you do not hate women. It's just a trend I notice and this forum is certainly not the only one guilty of it. It's ok man, I love you all JUST the way you are.

<<GROUP HUG>>