Well, this is a first

[6stringer]

So I ran into a situation that has never happened to me- always does when you think you've seen it all.
Went out with a very pretty woman, and we hit it off fairly quickly. When I texted her if she wanted to go out she reponded "please". Anyway, high attraction cros the board and we were pretty well matched smv wise.
Anyway, she was so into our dat that when we left the bar to go to get a bite she basically jumped my bones. We couldn't go back to my place do to our working the next morning and it was pretty late. So she asks me out that weekend but wants me to go her families house. I was kind of surprised as thats a bit soon, so I backed out and said I couldn't make it. But next day she alls me again and asks me to come over and not to worry the fam won't be there.
I show up and the entire family is there.. not only did she lie about it, but she was making dinner for all of us, so it was fairly planned.
Anyway, she pretended it was "an error".. I said no big deal, the fam was actually very nice to me so no harm no foul...
And here it gets even weirder, I text about getting together this weekend and she says she'll call back- and hasn't. lol
I've seen the kiss off, the high interest girl who doesnt want to see you the next day etc.. but the fam thing with a flake? that really is new.
I'm guessing her family didn't take to me. I hear for certain cultures (she is filipina/mix) that can be a deal breaker.
Anyway, no big deal, but it's weird, right? Or am I wrong?

 

[Jair213]

the fam probably disapproved

 

[SAYNO]

Nope. Fam didnt approve. Thats why you shouldnt have went, that way you could have prolonged things and got to hit a few more times.. you did hit right?:box:

 

[TheCWord]

Haha that's a great story. When you're married you'll be glad you have these crazy dating experiences to recount.

So that b*tch was definitely crazy. Not only introducing you to the family so early, but tricking you into meeting them. So yeah, sure, her family disapproved but that's not the highlight of the story. The highlight is you found yourself in that situation in the first place. Hilarious.

Edit: Can I ask why you wanted to get together with her after this? Again, this is a good story to tell at bars and I'm surprised you wouldn't just leave it at that. That situation should've sent you running for the hills. Do you not have enough girls in your life right now?

 

[mangotot]

the fam probably disapproved

Spot on about the fam, the fam took a dislike.

Its not a big loss to you because she is a deceiver, certainly not the sort you want to get into a LTR with. Certainly not the sort to start a fam with.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

next day she alls me again and asks me to come over and not to worry the fam won't be there.
I show up and the entire family is there..

Stop right there. BLATANT disrespect of you and your time.

not only did she lie about it, but she was making dinner for all of us, so it was fairly planned.

Yes, it was.

Anyway, she pretended it was "an error".. I said no big deal, the fam was actually very nice to me so no harm no foul

This is where you are wrong.

I text about getting together this weekend and she says she'll call back- and hasn't. lol

I don't think it matters what the family said (could matter, but I don't see it that way)

What matters is she disrespected you, then you rewarded her for it.

Her interpretation of you: No balls. Next.

 

[LMFAO]

She's crazy, next on her. Don't text her again.

 

[hudpes]

Her interpretation of you: No balls. Next.

This is not the reason. What is, we will never know, but it has something to do with the fam.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

it has something to do with the fam.

Why do you say that?

 

[mangotot]

You should figure out what the fam didn't like about you. So you can learn something from this experience.

 

[jimmy18]

OP did you talk with your mouth full at the dinner table?

 

[6stringer]

Well to explain why I wasn't too bothered by the fam thing, except to be weirded out was that I was ok just hitting it. I wasn't too invested so who cares all that much. Second, I figured if I was in that deep for her to want the fam to meet then she would be a good long term plate to spin.
looking back I remember her sister leaving at one point and not even coming back out to say bye. She had said that she loved Clinton and Reagan to which I joked that I hated all politicians. Everyone laughed but she seemed put off, looking back. Now that I think about it, she disappeared after that.
I'm sure it was more than that. Her hubby is pure beta- all the men there were.
maybe they just want a guy who is more of a kiss ass.
I don't really care but I've been wanting an Asian chick to add to my rotation.

 

[The Duke]

She played the textbook cluster b tricks on you.

 

[6stringer]

I'm not that familiar with cluster b. Is that bipolar?

 

[stevo]

I actually think she probably just wanted a ''date'' to the dinner more than anything else to show off to her family. The girl's potential should not be anything more than a plate. I reeeeally hope you did hit it, if you did then no loss.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

She played the textbook cluster b tricks on you.

I was thinking possibly BPD, and I'm not exactly sure how related the two are.

The quickness of how it all escalated, and the ease of it, and then the manipulation when you didn't immediately do what she wanted. Chick's definitely got some screws loose. She goes from wanting to bang on the first night, then wanting you to meet her family, then ignoring you. If she's nuts, she shouldn't really care what her family thinks. So it seems that meeting the family that quickly, in itself, was just another manipulation tactic. It makes you invest. So now, if you leave her, you're also leaving her family.

I'm guessing she wants you to chase right now. Which you shouldn't of course. BPD's like the betas, so she could seeing how much beta you have in ya.

Anyway, just speculating, but, either way, it sounds like a NEXT to me or, at the maximum, a ONS/FB if you Alpha it up. <------This is only if you're a gambling man and know how to play your cards right. Playing with BPD's is like playing with Fire.....

 

[6stringer]

Maybe you guys are right. I'm just more interested in the story itself at this point.

 

[christoff522]

Anyway, just speculating, but, either way, it sounds like a NEXT to me or, at the maximum, a ONS/FB if you Alpha it up. <------This is only if you're a gambling man and know how to play your cards right. Playing with BPD's is like playing with Fire.....

If Peaks is right OP, I recommend staying far away from her. If she's BPD she's absolutely cracked in the head. BPD's are dangerous beasts

 

[Skyline]

So she asks me out that weekend but wants me to go her families house. I was kind of surprised as thats a bit soon, so I backed out and said I couldn't make it. But next day she alls me again and asks me to come over and not to worry the fam won't be there.
I show up and the entire family is there.. not only did she lie about it, but she was making dinn

Peaks&Valley's you're on the right track about disrespect but that's not where I think he messed up on here...

When she had asked him to come over and basically meet her family, the OP basically backed out with some lame excuse. She knew this was an excuse to not meet her family! So the next day, she challenged him by saying that her family would not be there, because she knew that was the issue. Why else would she randomly bring up : "my family won't be there?" Anyways the OP takes the bait and he shows up. Not only did she catch him basically not being direct and honest about not meeting her family, but he allowed her to lie to him! The OP should have said no because he was simply "busy."

She basically caught you lying in a sense.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Peaks&Valley's you're on the right track about disrespect but that's not where I think he messed up on here...

When she had asked him to come over and basically meet her family, the OP basically backed out with some lame excuse. She knew this was an excuse to not meet her family! So the next day, she challenged him by saying that her family would not be there, because she knew that was the issue. Why else would she randomly bring up : "my family won't be there?" Anyways the OP takes the bait and he shows up. Not only did she catch him basically not being direct and honest about not meeting her family, but he allowed her to lie to him! The OP should have said no because he was simply "busy."

She basically caught you lying in a sense.

Whether he made up the excuse or not, I'm sure OP had a 1000 things he'd rather do than meeting this woman's family. I sure would. If she had a brain or at least some tact she would recognize that hey, this guy doesn't want to meet my family right now. The point is he did not want to meet her family. And under these circumstances, she should have accepted it and respected his decision. Instead she manipulates and flat out lies to him, to get him to meet her family. And, later, OP communicated that is okay for her to do this to him. <-----------Beta That's where he fvcked up. I don't see how he could have known she was lying to him. He believed her, I don't think there's anything wrong with that in her eyes. *shrugs*