Weirdest second date I've ever been on.

[Juicyjays]

Hey guys, quick update on what happened from my previous post.

So this chick messages me today in the morning (we met at a house party, we fooled around all night (slept together but didnt have sex) and she says she really likes me and wants to get to know me better but she dosen't want commitment.. We were drunk, next morning she was still making out with me when she was sober saying she wants to get to know me, blabla) asking me if I'm still up for going to the movies with her. I say yes, for sure. She replies, "Ok see you then )"

So we meet up at the theatre. She hugs me, and she pulls her cheek toward me, not her lips, for a kiss, but I was honestly just not paying attention, which I should of been, and I just hugged her (I honestly think that's no big deal, little hard to get never killed anyone).

We get in the theatre and her body language is out of whack. Her legs are crossed entirely in the opposite direction from me with her hands tied together, so I get a bad feeling. I do some kino, brazing her shoulder, but I was such a chump for some reason that I didn't even try putting my arm around her.

Then she got extremely quiet even when I was trying to converse with her. Asked her if everything was ok (by the way, I'm smiling the entire time I'm saying this, I was showing no fear or sadness), she instantly says yes. Tried to hold her hand halfway through the movie, told her I had a suprise for her, two dinner tickets to the theatre (got em for free from work) and if she wanted to go on Sunday (I don't know why the hell I did this), she says maybe, she pulled her hand away probably after 4-5 seconds of holding it.

We get out of the movie and I ask if she wants to get a bite to eat but she says shes tired (said it in the theatre before the movie started) and she'd rather go home. Told her I was busy 'til sunday and maybe I'll see her then.

She drives me home (car is down). I move in for a kiss (I was an idiot and never touched her hair, dunno what was wrong with my game tonight.. sure Im gonna hear a lot of it from you guys), she pulls her cheek towards me instead and I kiss her cheek, she kisses mine back. I smile and say, "You're pretty shy it seems" She says, "No, im just really tired."

Bam that's that. I know I made a lot of errors tonight. Bah.

I know to obviously not text her for a couple days but is there any other advice you guys could give me? Should I just move on, or do I still have something here?

 

[tihash]

Hey, I have had somewhat similar experiences before. One time got head on date #1 and on date #2 just a peck at the end of the date. Tonight, had date #2 with a girl at my house and I didn't make a move when we kissed with tongue at the end of date #1.

I have been thinking about it and I think the solution for the future is to make up your mind on every single date you will make the ho say no. On every date you will ASSUME she wants your c0ck in her pu$$y and proceed accordingly until you either get it or until she makes it clear she wants you to stop.

So go for the kiss even if you are unsure, and don't let the body language phase you. Good body language is great, and bad body language should be ignored.

I think THAT is the policy for every single date. Then you will never screw up. At least that is my new policy. I hope I remember to follow it...

 

[Juicyjays]

Agreed, thank you for the advice. I have learned my lesson. I really did move in for the kiss but I did nothing prior (I did a lot of kino but that's it). I should of grazed her hair, cheek, etc. Next time I will be more aggressive (not in a creeper way of course).

Oh and one more imporant thing; she is apparently religious. She believes in Jesus (yet she gets smashed and we fool around all night). She told me when we were in bed together that she's had way too much random sex in the past and she wants to take it slow. That's the thing though, I had no sex in my mind at all. I really just wanted to kiss her. Not only that but her last boyfriend was apparently a **** and he really hurt her (best friend told me that). She's probably being cautious.

Who knows. We'll see how my next date tommorow goes with this other chick. Definitley gonna do everything different.

 

[tihash]

Is there still a chance?

I asked myself the same question as the girl drove away from my house tonight.

And there is only one way to find out: ask her out again.

I think after a "failure" date like this (knowing that date #1 was much better-- in your case involving the lay), you need to go all out for the next date. Two "failure" dates in a row and I'd say forget it. But you are at only one failure date with this chick.

The answer is to ask her out again, and to make the next date a high energy venue. F a movie, F dinner, and F sitting next to her on a couch talking. I am thinking a very loud, very busy bar or club with live music, dancing, alcohol, etc.

Even if you don't dance (I don't) take her somewhere that has a dance floor because the vibe is more lively. I think loud, dark, and crowded, PLUS ALCOHOL, is a must. That way you two are standing. Other people will be there making out. It is loud so you must talk in each other's ears. Go for the makeout at the club/bar. Even if you don't lay her again, consider it a victory if you get your tongue in her mouth. And don't forget: ASSUME she wants sex and GO ALL OUT FOR IT.

My only concerns:

(a). today is Monday and this type of next date lends itself to Friday or Saturday, which seems kinda like an eternity from now; and

(b). not quite sure how to play the phone/text game in light of letter (a). Are you thinking no contact tomorrow and then ask her out wed for fri or sat? That is what I'm leaning towards...

 

[Tiguere]

She didn't wanted to be seen as a slvt in her own image. I mean she slept with you kinda like a ONS so what better way for her to rationalize it in her man that she isn't a ***** than to faking getting to know you.

 

[Juicyjays]

Well, I told her I was busy until Sunday was the thing. She asked me if I like to keep busy and I said "yeah, I do, im always on the go."

And I really am. I have a lot of friends and family I hang out with all days of the week.

Agreed, I was thinking the exact same thing tihash. What I was thinking though was yes, calling her on Wednesday or Thursday and seeing if she wants to come to the bar where I'm the head Chef at when I get off work (she's hinted to me she REALLY wants to get in there). It's a dueling piano bar, its lively, its packed and the waiting list is for MONTHS, but I could land her in. No problem. Think that's a good idea?

 

[f283000]

She didn't wanted to be seen as a slvt in her own image. I mean she slept with you kinda like a ONS so what better way for her to rationalize it in her man that she isn't a ***** than to faking getting to know you.

Correct. OP seems to have a case of "buyer's remorse" in his hands which is when you hook up with a girl to fast without first building comfort/rapport. This is often the case when hooking up at parties when often the people involved are drunk.

So when she went out with you and started putting obstacles she was trying to save her image like Tiquere said.

 

[Oxide]

Stop taking girls to the movies for the first 1-3 dates, for your own sakes.

Yes you have a chance, go grab some ice cream and have fun.


I once went out with a girl and after 3 hours wasn't sure she was into me. We parted via hugging (which made me cringe) Next date I kissed her, then it turned into a relationship.

She says yes to dates = in the bag

 

[Juicyjays]

So, so true. Thank you.

Do you think I should ditch the dinner theatre date (we wouldn't talk at all, just like a movie) that I asked her to come to me with on Sunday and instead invite her out to the bar that she really wants to go to on Fri or Sat? I get staff drinks ($4) for any of my friends that I bring in (I'm the Head Chef of the kitchen), and like I said, the waiting list is for months. Extremely exclusive.

 

[KingofHearts]

Agreed, thank you for the advice. I have learned my lesson. I really did move in for the kiss but I did nothing prior (I did a lot of kino but that's it). I should of grazed her hair, cheek, etc. Next time I will be more aggressive (not in a creeper way of course).

Oh and one more imporant thing; she is apparently religious. She believes in Jesus (yet she gets smashed and we fool around all night). She told me when we were in bed together that she's had way too much random sex in the past and she wants to take it slow. That's the thing though, I had no sex in my mind at all. I really just wanted to kiss her. Not only that but her last boyfriend was apparently a **** and he really hurt her (best friend told me that). She's probably being cautious.

Who knows. We'll see how my next date tommorow goes with this other chick. Definitley gonna do everything different.

Ask yourself how important getting more sex from this girl really is. If you ask me, its too much drama. And definitely not LTR material, so hopefully that's not what you're thinking. Its not too late, I think you still have a chance for sex but its an uphill battle for something that shouldn't be.

Every kino move you tried to do during the movie made you look more and more like a chump. I've been there and done that before too. She created that problem, but you made it worse instead of ignoring her girly head games. I don't get why people take girls to movies in the first place. Waste of money, waste of time. There are way more exciting things to do and you might even pay less money.

You mentioned you're head chef - play to your strengths man! You should invite girls to your restaurant so you can show off your cooking talents. That will save you money and time. Plus it makes you look good.

 

[Oxide]

So, so true. Thank you.

Do you think I should ditch the dinner theatre date (we wouldn't talk at all, just like a movie) that I asked her to come to me with on Sunday and instead invite her out to the bar that she really wants to go to on Fri or Sat? I get staff drinks ($4) for any of my friends that I bring in (I'm the Head Chef of the kitchen), and like I said, the waiting list is for months. Extremely exclusive.

if she isn't going out with her friends fri-sat and had it planned, then yeah take her out. Don't be soo eager either, throw in a little challenge "we can only go to where they serve drinks if you can keep your hands off me! I know how girls blame it on the a-a-alcohol" if you like having fun with her, then do so, get to know her first, i usually do that 1. on dates before sex. 2. in bed after sex

 

[Kailex]

Oh and one more imporant thing; she is apparently religious. She believes in Jesus

(yet she gets smashed and we fool around all night). She told me when we were in bed together that she's had way too much random sex in the past and she wants to take it slow.

OUCH.

I wouldn't get too emotionally invested on this one.
She TELLS you that she believes in Jesus and you take her to be a catholic schoolgirl?
Look, whether she told you or not she is religious is NOT the point... it's the fact that she "seems" religious and then gets smashed and ADMITS to having TOO much random sex in the past?

Forget the "take it slow" part.

Why does she all of a sudden want to take it slow and not have more random sex? And this isn't even the worst part.

That's the thing though, I had no sex in my mind at all. I really just wanted to kiss her.

THIS is the worst part.
Sex wasn't on your mind? Why not? You're a MAN. Sex HAS to be on your mind, specially when a woman says she's had a LOT of random sex before.

She's admitting to be a GLORIFIED WHORRE.

She's admitting to having TOO much random sex.

And you're approaching this as an LTR???

Can you see where the logic ceases to exist within this? She's had random sex, but wants to take it slow. You say you don't have sex on your mind, but you just want to kiss.

Look, you two are obviously on different wavelengths. I guarantee when she said she didn't want more random sex... what she meant was sex with total strangers at a club she just met, but if you butter her up a little, take her out on a date, she'll more than put out... EASILY.
Why?

Because she ADMITTED TO BEING A WHORRE.

And here's where you are failing the most... you want to turn this WHORRE into an LTR.

Be careful, tread VERY carefully.
I have the feeling you'll end up burned.

 

[Juicyjays]

I should reiterate, of course I have sex on my mind, I always do. I was just always told that while on a date you shouldn't show it and I didn't, they can smell it a mile away. It seems that whenver I think about fvcking a girl on a date, I never fvck her, so lately I've been putting it out of my mind, with good results actually. I just think of her as some woman (with the exception of this date.. lol)

You're right though, I'm treading into dangerous waters here and I will get burned. And no, now I really don't want an LTR (did at first with her), but after this date I'm just taking all of this as a learning experience.

 

[Oxide]

Kailex, that was a really good post. I agree. Take her out have a few drinks bang her a few times don't get attached