Now who's this special girl? For those of you know my history, it's my cousin. Yup, the cousin who I wanted to bang months ago. Remember the sh** storm that ensued? If not, here.
Well, luckily, I came to my senses and decided not to bang her. Why? Because, on one hand, it's my cousin and, morally, I have found myself against the idea of incest. In addition, she has a boyfriend who is a good guy. Most of all, she's only 18, so I know she wouldn't keep it secret. There are way more cons than pros.
If you read my previous thread in the link above, you will find out that we were playing games with each other, and we "friend-zoned" each other constantly, back and forth. I got sick of it, matured a little bit, and moved on.
I'm still a virgin, but honestly I'm not desperate enough to bang her. She is still "in love" with me though. I read an interesting thread about girls always having some degree of feelings for their first "alpha", and the way I used to aggressively hit on her whilst she was getting into a relationship for the first time technically made me that "alpha". Just for the record, I think "alpha and beta male" are BS concepts, but hopefully you get my point. My gut instinct tells me she still has feelings for me by the glances and IOIs she gives me every time I see her at family gatherings.
Tonight, she gave me a look that I've recognized before. In a nutshell, she gave me the look of defeat and disappointment that I saw months ago. At that time, I showed too much interest in her (too clingy?), and she constantly mentioned her BF when I talked to her, challenged everything I said, and urged me to hook up with her friend instead (i.e. constant indicators of disinterest). When I jokingly declared my love for one of her best friends at a party in a drunken stupor later, I saw my cousin the next night. Her lips didn't move, but her eyes said something along the lines of "Why don't you love me anymore?". An immediate look of submission, extremely different than the way she used to look at me when she wasn't interested.
Anyway, she gave me that look again tonight. I went for a smoke with her BF, and I think the fact that I'm not bothered by the fact I know he's f***ing her and am willing to be cool with him, reinforced the notion that I have no feelings for her anymore. In addition, she knows that I've showed interest in her friend, whom I've texted on and off over the past few weeks, but haven't dated (her interest level is just way too low). I've also deleted my facebook, so she won't have any insight into my private life or see any girls (or lack thereof) who I've added or who have "liked" my statuses. I don't know how often she used to check my profile, but maybe she has noticed and possibly has seen it as a sign of "change" in my (love) life.
Maybe I'm over-analyzing this whole conundrum, but, for her sake and closure for myself, I want to get it back to the point where I feel that she only sees me as a friend, not a lover.
Should I hit on her constantly again until she grows sick of it? Maybe I could get her alone and tell her "I love you" or "I see you as more than a cousin. I have deep feelings for you and am desperate" in the most convincingly pathetic manner as possible? Or maybe I could straight-up tell her I'm a kissless virgin and am deathly afraid of girls?
Thoughts? Any suggestions? Or maybe I'm not interpreting the situation correctly? I'm just looking for some honest opinions.
Well, luckily, I came to my senses and decided not to bang her. Why? Because, on one hand, it's my cousin and, morally, I have found myself against the idea of incest. In addition, she has a boyfriend who is a good guy. Most of all, she's only 18, so I know she wouldn't keep it secret. There are way more cons than pros.
If you read my previous thread in the link above, you will find out that we were playing games with each other, and we "friend-zoned" each other constantly, back and forth. I got sick of it, matured a little bit, and moved on.
I'm still a virgin, but honestly I'm not desperate enough to bang her. She is still "in love" with me though. I read an interesting thread about girls always having some degree of feelings for their first "alpha", and the way I used to aggressively hit on her whilst she was getting into a relationship for the first time technically made me that "alpha". Just for the record, I think "alpha and beta male" are BS concepts, but hopefully you get my point. My gut instinct tells me she still has feelings for me by the glances and IOIs she gives me every time I see her at family gatherings.
Tonight, she gave me a look that I've recognized before. In a nutshell, she gave me the look of defeat and disappointment that I saw months ago. At that time, I showed too much interest in her (too clingy?), and she constantly mentioned her BF when I talked to her, challenged everything I said, and urged me to hook up with her friend instead (i.e. constant indicators of disinterest). When I jokingly declared my love for one of her best friends at a party in a drunken stupor later, I saw my cousin the next night. Her lips didn't move, but her eyes said something along the lines of "Why don't you love me anymore?". An immediate look of submission, extremely different than the way she used to look at me when she wasn't interested.
Anyway, she gave me that look again tonight. I went for a smoke with her BF, and I think the fact that I'm not bothered by the fact I know he's f***ing her and am willing to be cool with him, reinforced the notion that I have no feelings for her anymore. In addition, she knows that I've showed interest in her friend, whom I've texted on and off over the past few weeks, but haven't dated (her interest level is just way too low). I've also deleted my facebook, so she won't have any insight into my private life or see any girls (or lack thereof) who I've added or who have "liked" my statuses. I don't know how often she used to check my profile, but maybe she has noticed and possibly has seen it as a sign of "change" in my (love) life.
Maybe I'm over-analyzing this whole conundrum, but, for her sake and closure for myself, I want to get it back to the point where I feel that she only sees me as a friend, not a lover.
Should I hit on her constantly again until she grows sick of it? Maybe I could get her alone and tell her "I love you" or "I see you as more than a cousin. I have deep feelings for you and am desperate" in the most convincingly pathetic manner as possible? Or maybe I could straight-up tell her I'm a kissless virgin and am deathly afraid of girls?
Thoughts? Any suggestions? Or maybe I'm not interpreting the situation correctly? I'm just looking for some honest opinions.
