Weird Girl

[asid76]

Hello all,

I met this girl, aged nineteen, real young compared to my 32 years. She touches me alot, flirts with me, rubs her breasts up against my arm "by accident" etc. etc. - in short - HEAVILY flirtatious body language.
BUT...BUT...She ALWAYS puts me down verbally by calling me short, bald, old, retarded etc. I am wondering about the psychology behind this.

If I was to listen to only her body language I would say she wants me. If I were to go with what she SAYS I would think I repulse her. Its very unsettling cause I am not sure how to deal with younger girls these days, they are getting stranger and stranger in my opinion. I wouldn't mind hooking up with this one, but I am not sure after all the insulting comments.

Interested in anyones thoughts...is it possible that she is in fact interested? How would you deal with a girl like this?

Cheers!

 

[jophil28]

Hello all,

I met this girl, aged nineteen, real young compared to my 32 years. She touches me alot, flirts with me, rubs her breasts up against my arm "by accident" etc. etc. - in short - HEAVILY flirtatious body language.
BUT...BUT...She ALWAYS puts me down verbally by calling me short, bald, old, retarded etc. I am wondering about the psychology behind this.

If I was to listen to only her body language I would say she wants me. If I were to go with what she SAYS I would think I repulse her. Its very unsettling cause I am not sure how to deal with younger girls these days, they are getting stranger and stranger in my opinion. I wouldn't mind hooking up with this one, but I am not sure after all the insulting comments.

Interested in anyones thoughts...is it possible that she is in fact interested? How would you deal with a girl like this?

Cheers!

Some guys here will go on and on about women's sh!t tests and how women love "push/ pull" and how she is "negging" you and so on...blah blah.

Frankly she sounds like a loonie adolescent brat who does not know how to respect her "elders"..he he.

I got TWO of these 'ferals' in my dance studios- they LOVE provoking me with all that trash talk.
I just call them Brat 1 and Brat 2...seems to make it worse somehow.

The issue here is NOT whether she wants you, it is whether you are willing to get dragged along by her juvenile crap for some distant ( and imagined) offer of pvssy which MAY never eventuate.

 

[STR8UP]

She's either making fun of you or she's flirting, and there's one way to find out which it is. Try to stick your d!ck in her mouth.

 

[Nelford]

I use to deal with a girl like this. She would get on me about having one wrinkle in my jeans failing to realize that was the way the jeans were design. She would try her hand at anything to see if I would break. I never paid it no mind because my mission was to put her face in the pillow. Funny thing was she would always call me and beg to see me when I rejected her advance, she would start bit$hing about how I was neglecting her. This girl use to catch the train and bus to see me. I finally got to put her face in the pillow and it got worse. My phone was ringing like I was some company answering service. Mind you this girl was in her early twenties.

If she is a fruit cake the best advice I can give you is to leave her alone. There are more out there...

 

[Andy_Dufresne]

All the above: sh^t tests.

She definitely digs you. She probably sh^t tests every guy she meets. Don't fall for it....make sure you go toe to toe with her sarcasm or even turn it up a notch on her next time you see her. Guarantee that it will pay dividends. Just make sure you give us a field report when it does.

 

[squirrels]

Isolate and escalate.

Isolate because what it sounds like here is that she might be attracted to you, but be afraid that you're not "show quality", i.e. not a guy she can show off to her friends. So she puts you down when they're around, but secretly feels an attraction she can't quite control. Same as the girl who calls a boy gross and punches him in the arm on the playground.

Escalate because it's the only way to find out if a girl is really into you. You can sit and debate the meaning of these "signs", or you can find out for sure. Either is an acceptable option, but one option is manlier and more decisive than the other.

BTW, where did you meet this girl? Do you work with her? Be careful with co-workers.

 

[NewMan]

How many dates have you been on?
Who pays?
Who makes all the calls?

All of the above are important points.

If you've yet to esculate and AT LEAST make out with her, chances are she's just keeping you around.

As stated above, you need to esculate and stop beating around the bush.

 

[betterthandead]

Watch out for the clutches of the Succubus.

 

[Scaramouche]

High Asid76,
She is playing with you,put the hard word on her and when she flakes Pviss her off.

 

[asid76]

Wow thanks guys!! Great advice in almost every reply.

Your posts just clarified what I had already suspected but its nice to have a second opinion. I was under the impression she wanted me but who knows with the younger ones these days.

I should really be thanking her because she is definitely trying to play games and is a master sh1t-tester and this is GREAT practice - I'm holding my own excellently by the way, shes VERY sarcastic, BUT shes new at my work and doesn't realize yet that I am the MOST sarcastic person in the office (oh yeah) and shes learning the hard way not to say anything in front of co-workers because I can totally tear her apart. After her constant badgering, I'll be able to handle any future episodes of the same sort. As much as her behaviour was confusing me, I should also mention how helpful it is to have someone like her doing this each day, thus HELPING me to become better at my rebuttals and at passing these "tests".

I've learned alot in the past few days from her while keeping these posts in the back of my mind. All her words are so different and contradictory to her actions but I guess actions ARE supposed to speak louder so I've started really listening and watching and by my analysis I'll have her sometime just after the New Year...

Squirrels, thats exactly what I was thinking...I will be moving into Operation Isolate very shortly; I already have the perfect premise and we will see...I will keep everyone updated. I think its going to be good news...

 

[Luveno]

Is this your career or your job?

If its a job, go for it. Who cares?

If its your career, don't go for it. You're a fool if you do. Never dip the pen in the company ink. There are millions of sexy young women out there. Go find one that doesn't work with you.

 

[Jeffst1980]

I'm going to go against the grain on this one.
I don't know how she's delivering those putdowns, but I wouldn't necessarily take them as signs of interest. A highly interested girl is usually so compliant that she gives you nothing but compliments. A highly interested girl will generally not toss insults, even in jest, lest they offend you and turn you off. S#it tests don't happen when interest is high.

This girl sounds like an AW, especially when coupled with the fact that she is new at your job. She simply shouldn't be behaving this way in a professional environment in which she is not yet established. It sounds as though she wants to become the talk of the office, and the best way to do that is to introduce sexual tension.

That said, I'm sure that you could turn her into a highly interested woman if you stand your ground and refuse to give her the upper hand. You need to start punishing her bad behavior; don't trade insults with her, just simply and coolly end the interaction as soon as she starts the insults. She needs to respect you first and foremost, before any gaming--imagine being in a relationship where your partner spent all her time publicly cutting you down! That's not what you deserve, and you need to establish this from the getgo. Otherwise, she'll see you as the goofy older guy that will always give her attention, while she sets her sights on the guy in accounting that always ignores her. You don't want her to feel so comfortable around you.

Aside from all this, I'm very much against going after coworkers:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=153051

 

[jophil28]

"S#it tests don't happen when interest is high."
Sorry but this isn't true.

YEs it is mostly true and especially true of quality woman. A high quality woman will NOT sh!t test you in the way that the OP described. IT is sh!t behavior on her part .
Sh!t testing is NOT what regular woman do "just because they are chicks" . Some of you guys bother me in the distorted beliefs that you are promoting about what is "normal" female behavior..
Raise your standards and your expectations for pete's sake..

 

[Andy_Dufresne]

All women test for a man's congruency. Quality women do it in a subtle, classy way. Stupid attention whhores do it in immature, crass ways. And this girl is about as immature and crass as a chick can get. This woman is a slob. Trust me, sex with her will suck.

It may be good practice, but you need to do it from a position that she has issues and her act is transparent to you. This is the proper frame of the situation.

To a man, I'd drop this one asap. She is an attention whoore. This behavior is so over the top and inappropriate, especially since she is new at work.

I don't even think this one is worth your time to nail. You can do way better than her.

I disagree. I think others would back me up that the good ones sh^t test. I've been around...the more they sh^t test the better the reward after you pass all their little stupid tests. Sure, this one is young and she may be naive and overdoing it....all the better. Asid, you could do her a favor and be the guy who sets her straight, and get some mind blowing sex while you're at it.

 

[asid76]

I'm going to go against the grain on this one.
I don't know how she's delivering those putdowns, but I wouldn't necessarily take them as signs of interest. A highly interested girl is usually so compliant that she gives you nothing but compliments. A highly interested girl will generally not toss insults, even in jest, lest they offend you and turn you off. S#it tests don't happen when interest is high.

This girl sounds like an AW, especially when coupled with the fact that she is new at your job. She simply shouldn't be behaving this way in a professional environment in which she is not yet established. It sounds as though she wants to become the talk of the office, and the best way to do that is to introduce sexual tension.

That said, I'm sure that you could turn her into a highly interested woman if you stand your ground and refuse to give her the upper hand. You need to start punishing her bad behavior; don't trade insults with her, just simply and coolly end the interaction as soon as she starts the insults. She needs to respect you first and foremost, before any gaming--imagine being in a relationship where your partner spent all her time publicly cutting you down! That's not what you deserve, and you need to establish this from the getgo. Otherwise, she'll see you as the goofy older guy that will always give her attention, while she sets her sights on the guy in accounting that always ignores her. You don't want her to feel so comfortable around you.

Aside from all this, I'm very much against going after coworkers:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=153051

You know what? You are absolutely right. If I continuously play her games then I'm not going to get anywhere. I have actually started turning away from her when she gets going with the comments and she is stopping the insults, although she did call me old today to which I replied, in a mock sort of way that thats the reason she could never "have" me.
She paused, grimaced her face and was like "I don't WANT you". I was like "yeah right" and we left it at that. Then later in the day she was all over me again, touching my hair, telling me it looked good today etc. etc. so I that was a good sign.

I honestly DONT care if I get her so this is all fun and games for me, I have better girls (more my age) that I am working on anyway, so this girl is really unimportant...I just find her behaviour a little different than I am used to.

 

[Chrispy]

She sounds very unprofessional and bad for your job. Be careful there. In another environment, I would advise you game her. There is interest, and from experience, you can go far if you call her $hit tests and don't break your confidence.

In the end though these games are more an aggravation. You are better off going with someone else.

As I said before, you can up it to the bedroom but don't expect the tests to end. So it's either have a headache or have a clear head having moved on.

 

[Warrior74]

I dated an ugly chic once...who constantly called me tubby, fatboy, big guts because of my beer belly. It was the only thing she could say bad about me. It didn't affect me one bit because hey...she was ugly and I was in slump and just wanted some steady action.

It's a neg bro. Trying to break you down to her level. She feels your waaaay above her. That's why she grimaced...you struck home to her secret fear. That she can't keep you.

Like it says in the The 48 Laws Of Power, Disdain Things you cannot have.