Weekly Discussion Thread #1

AC/DC

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I thought it would be helpful to have a weekly discussion on a chosen controversial problem, like a public online debate. This way, newbies and oldies alike can see how we solve problems. Problem solving is very important...

Responses will be written as an essay, detailing YOUR method of solving the question, and maybe fixing other people's ideas, if fundamentally flawed. Just thought this would be a a bit helpful. I will administrate this thread, and if you would like to see a certain question posted, then feel free to send a Private Message my way, and I'll definitely post it up.

This week's question is: How to escape the friend zone?

(I'll give my response after I do it for a second time, to make it fresh in my mind.)
 

AC/DC

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Excellent question.

"Valid" is who I find is not a waste of my time. Only experimentation and time can tell this.
 

Sephiroth

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The deeper you are into the friendzone, the harder it can be to escape it, mainly because there is more to jeopardize.

What you are trying to do is show her you are not willing to be her emotional tampon, and that you won't be just some guy she can vent to. You need to show her you are a sexual being, and a valuable commodity to women.

In my opinion, this is the only way you can try to draw her out of the f-zone.

Frankly, it'd be more useful to give advice on how to avoid being LJBF'd than to give advice on how to escape it.
 

icallug

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from experience, i have broken away from the strongest friend zone ever. Me and this girl were basicly like bro and sis, best friends, i even went camping with her family. i started to give up then we just started to do stuff. I thought it would never happen. So basicly, even though we have a super strong friendship, we still do stuff. I think i achieved this by never stopping DJing her, i was heavy on the stuff during the beginning but got shot down. Then i started to just lay back and relax seeing has we are just friends, but i never said i stopped, i just didnt do it has much. Dont give up and it'll work. trust me me and the girl were best friends and now we are best friends with benefits.
 

Jay_VCU

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I read this somewhere. The person said, "When the girl LJBF's you just say, 'No, that's ok. I already have enough friends.'" Then go. No contact for at least a few months. IF she doesn't initiate anything after a period of time you can go back and basically start from scratch.
 

dbot

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If you are in a girl's "friend zone," then you are not someone she thinks about sexually. It doesn’t matter how hot you look, to her you are no different than any of her girlfriends.

With men, there is no “friend zone”. EVERY girl is a potential. The only chicks that we are "just friends" with are the ugly ones, and if they suddenly lost weight or got a boobjob, they too would become potentials. A great friend of mine whom I've known since I was five is one of the most beautiful girls I've ever met. It doesn't matter that she is one of my best friends, I still wanna fuk her.

In order to escape from this dreaded prison we call the “friend zone”, you must reintroduce her to your sexual being, allowing her natural curiosity of sex (with you) to make its way back into her thought process. This is quite simple and can be done fairly easily using NLP. I found that Ross Jeffries' "Friends into Lovers" pattern works best.

If speed seduction isn’t your thing, there are plenty of other ways to get out of a chick’s friend zone. Simply talking more sexual during conversation can work wonders. A while back when a “friend” of mine turned 18, I told her “Do you know what this means? I’m illegal!” I was just joking around with her, but that’s all it took. The next night she couldn’t keep her hands off me :p Remember, if the girl thinks about fuking you even for a second, consider yourself free. But from there comes a new challenge… seducing her :)
 

triple_ultima

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Good post dbot.

My views differ somewhat. I have had a female friend since first grade. She is fairyl good looking and has a great personality, but I do not feel attracted to her whatsoever, and I'm sure the feeling is mutual. She is almost like a relative.

As for girls that I have more recently met, I know that I am in the zone with some of them. Getting out of the zone would require so much effort and time on my part that it simply wouldn't be worth it, I have much better prospects elsewhere, and there is no way I'm exerting so much effort just for one stupid girl. That would be completely stupid.
 

Superman X

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You don't escape LJBF, you never get in it. If you are LJBFed just go after another girl, it's less effort than trying to "break the friends zone".
 

stomping

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Originally posted by Jay_VCU
I read this somewhere. The person said, "When the girl LJBF's you just say, 'No, that's ok. I already have enough friends.'" Then go. No contact for at least a few months. IF she doesn't initiate anything after a period of time you can go back and basically start from scratch.
i still talk to her, i just stay very very very very distant ..same effect?
 

dbot

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Originally posted by Superman X
You don't escape LJBF, you never get in it. If you are LJBFed just go after another girl, it's less effort than trying to "break the friends zone".
Everyone will let their guard down and get stuck in the friend zone at some point in time.
 

dbot

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Originally posted by Jester
Djs dont get in the friend zone.
I gotta disagree. Simply not making a move can land you in the friend zone. Most experienced DJs do their best not to allow their potentials to drop them in the friend zone, but it happens to everyone.
 

4nando

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Go up behind her, put your hands over her breasts and say "guess who!"

I do not recommend this if she already has a guy, or if she is the violent type.

All it takes is for you to say, somehow, that you want something from her, and whether or not she gives it to you is only a question of DJ skill.

Okay, so I never got this girl in bed, but I got out of the f-zone and we dated for a year.
 

Smooth as Anything

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Originally posted by dbot
I gotta disagree. Simply not making a move can land you in the friend zone. Most experienced DJs do their best not to allow their potentials to drop them in the friend zone, but it happens to everyone.
Nah, Jester is right.

No girl wants to be a friend of mine, primarily because I make it rather clear that I have no interest in being theirs.

As far as getting out of the friend zone, it's really a funny cycle.

1. If you want to get out of the cycle, you won't

Part of wanting to escape the friends zone is exactly what's keeping you there. You think she's special enough to try to attract, so you feel you need to up the relationship.

...it won't work.

2. The second you stop caring, she'll want you back.

Use this agaisnt her. She'll miss your 'talks' and whatnot. Just totally stop giving a ****, always be to busy for her. Be to sick when she wants to go somewhere.

In a month or two, start talking to her again -- but make it clear the instant you talk to her that you want her sexually -- and make her want you back the same.

Conversation techniques are excellent here -- always be thinking and speaking sexually. Not "I want to **** you like an animal" but "Bodies pressing agaisnt one another" in contrast to "Hugging" is good.

In short -- if you're friends with a girl you find attractive, odds say you aren't talented enough to turn it into a decent relationship.

...of course you could just up the stakes of your friendship as fvck buddies.

I do have one female friend, but she has wanted to have sex with me badly, in the past.

If she somehow got hot, I'd get her easy as pie... so.
 
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