We just broke up and shes giving me a month to get out!!!

[Snag87]

If she wants to get nasty with him she can weaponize the police and he could end up in jail depending on the type of officer that responds to the call. Especially in America people get the police involved in what should be civil issues.

Oh yeah, false allegations are something I hadn't considered. I wouldn't want to risk it.

 

[Billtx49]

I previously dated an apartment community manager. After enough non payment, an hour at most before a judge considering court wait time and she had an eviction notice. Returned to her property and after any required legal restitution notice and wait time, I’m thinking if my memory is correct, it was 7-10 days, if tenant’s didn’t move, apartment employees cleaned out the premises and installed new lock.
I can’t imagine how fast that process would be if a person was not on their lease and the legal tenant wanted them gone …
Apartment and many other leases are basically fool proof, prohibit residents not on lease, and basically benefit the landlord.

 

[Snag87]

I previously dated an apartment community manager. After enough non payment, an hour at most before a judge considering court wait time and she had an eviction notice. Returned to her property and after any required legal restitution notice and wait time, I’m thinking if my memory is correct, it was 7-10 days, if tenant’s didn’t move, apartment employees cleaned out the premises and installed new lock.
I can’t imagine how fast that process would be if a person was not on their lease and the legal tenant wanted them gone …
Apartment and many other leases are basically fool proof, prohibit residents not on lease, and basically benefit the landlord.

7-10 days? If you live in the US or Canada I'm not buying this.


"Before a landlord can start with the eviction action for failure to pay past due rent, the landlord must give the tenant a written 14 Days' Notice to Quit. This means a tenant must move out of the property in 14 days to avoid eviction."

 

[Billtx49]

7-10 days? If you live in the US or Canada I'm not buying this.

My memory could be incorrect on the time, but full rent restitution was Definitely required within 30 days and they were usually 60-90 days behind. Leasing ain’t charity…
They would hand out 10 day notices if rent payments weren’t made on due date.
Only one way to deal with deadbeats.

 

[Snag87]

My memory could be incorrect on the time, but full rent restitution was Definitely required within 30 days and they were usually 60-90 days behind. Leasing ain’t charity…
Only one way to deal with deadbeats.

Ah, sorry. I missed "after enough non-payment."

Yes, I could see a quick judgement when the tenant is 2 to 3 months behind on rent.

 

[corrector]

This is a good thead to archive. I've seen another guy cry when his ex-wife kicked him out and he was by himself, sitting on the floor of a supermarket by himself over an arguement that soured the relationship. This is what happens if you live in with a woman at her place. When she turns on you then you are toast. There is nothing worst than a woman making an ultimatum like that as a man. I've been through something similar with my own ex-wife and lets say the OP does put in a big effort to look for a job but doesn't land anything, he'll likely want to lash out against her in some way. At the end of the day they want results, they don't care if he made 1000 applications, got 20 interviews and has no job...just no compassion or empathy. And on top of that she wants him to do more work around the house and take care of her daughter. This is after he's drained out from jugging two or three low-wage demeaning jobs. He will end up snapping at her or lashing out and that will just as much end everything. His deal just got sour and should just leave her.

A real horror story to see this is what could happen if you want a sugar mommy and how they can just viciously turn on you.

 

[Billtx49]

Ah, sorry. I missed "after enough non-payment."

Yes, I could see a quick judgement when the tenant is 2 to 3 months behind on rent.

Well, OP stated he’s not on lease and no statement about him contributing to rent, but says $17K in savings. That buys him a temporary housing Somewhere until he finds the need to find legitimate employment in the real world instead of taking time to post here.

 

[wifehunter]

$2000 x 12 = $24K

$24K / 52 = $461.53

$461.53 / 5 = $92.31

$92.31 x 3 = $276.93

$276.93 / 8 = $34.61

In order to live in your area, and have rent be 33% of your income, you need to make $35/hr.

Who pays $35/hr, and compensates for inflation (20-30%)?

 

[Barrister]

My memory could be incorrect on the time, but full rent restitution was Definitely required within 30 days and they were usually 60-90 days behind. Leasing ain’t charity…
They would hand out 10 day notices if rent payments weren’t made on due date.
Only one way to deal with deadbeats.

I don't have experience filing these kind of actions anywhere except where I practice, but normally even after you have filed for immediate possession these type of hearings don't get set in front of a judge until at least 10-14 days after the time of filing - and more so towards the 14 day mark. If a court sees the individual is a tenant at sufferance without any lease whatsoever sometimes you can move that a bit quicker, but not always. Court congestion is a real thing.

 

[Snag87]

$2000 x 12 = $24K

$24K / 52 = $461.53

$461.53 / 5 = $92.31

$92.31 x 3 = $276.93

$276.93 / 8 = $34.61

In order to live in your area, and have rent be 33% of your income, you need to make $35/hr.

Who pays $35/hr, and compensates for inflation (20-30%)?

He can't afford an apartment. He should rent a room for $700 or so.

 

[Billtx49]

That’s at least one years housing plus expenses with 17K savings…
I don’t see why the need to post here like it’s an emergency situation …
How’s that old saying go about failure to plan?

 

[Snag87]

That’s at least one years housing plus expenses with 17K savings…
I don’t see why the need to post here like it’s an emergency situation …
How’s that saying go about failure to plan?

Agreed. Dude should just find a room to rent and move. A month is plenty of time. If he had 1k to his name this would be an emergency.

 

[corrector]

He should negotiate and contribute to some of the expenses of the place with his savings. She might take $ 500 / mo from him, he helps a bit here and there around the house and that would work better than having to share rooms somewhere else (likely other thirsty men). She cant ask him to get a job if he uses his own money to contribute to the place and at least earns his keep there.

 

[corrector]

Agreed. Dude should just find a room to rent and move. A month is plenty of time. If he had 1k to his name this would be an emergency.

But he still has to pay rent. That defeats the purpose once he has to pay out money to stay anywhere. If he has to pay something anyway then he should try to negotiate with his gf before paying rent somewhere else. Is the only thing that makes his arrangement with his gf better, if it is the case that he's a freeloader and doesn't have to contribute anything and she has to pleasure him because of an initial attraction that has now run its course? Relationships are about negotiating space and boundaries. Perhaps if she feels that it's one-sided, he needs to do a bit more to make it work.

 

[Billtx49]

But he still has to pay rent. That defeats the purpose once he has to pay out money to stay anywhere. If he has to pay something anyway then he should try to negotiate with his gf before paying rent somewhere else. Is the only thing that makes his arrangement with his gf better is that he's a freeloader and doesn't have to contribute anything and she has to pleasure him? Relationships are about negotiating space and boundaries. Perhaps if she feels that it's one-sided, he needs to do a bit more to make it work.

When it’s to the point of him being ordered to move out, Any relationship they had is now burnt Toast and adding butter won’t help…

 

[orbit123]

There's some points I need to address that I left out. I have been paying her half of the rent for the past 2 years. I have been doing college full time online since covid starting get bad. When she broke the news to me about me getting out things got weird quickly because she said if I stay past that date that her father is gonna come stay at the house and make things very awkward for me and her male friends will show up too. She's never been a violent person so I find this behavior odd from her. I know some of you are telling me to get a room but is that really doable when you have a child with you. Would it be better to just rent out a 2k bedroom and try to get a remote job or will I blow through my money too fast that way?

 

[orbit123]

But he still has to pay rent. That defeats the purpose once he has to pay out money to stay anywhere. If he has to pay something anyway then he should try to negotiate with his gf before paying rent somewhere else. Is the only thing that makes his arrangement with his gf better, if it is the case that he's a freeloader and doesn't have to contribute anything and she has to pleasure him because of an initial attraction that has now run its course? Relationships are about negotiating space and boundaries. Perhaps if she feels that it's one-sided, he needs to do a bit more to make it work.

I already tried negotiating with her and she's dead set on me leaving. I wish she would do that but she's very set on me leaving

 

[Billtx49]

There's some points I need to address that I left out. I have been paying her half of the rent for the past 2 years. I have been doing college full time online since covid starting get bad. When she broke the news to me about me getting out things got weird quickly because she said if I stay past that date that her father is gonna come stay at the house and make things very awkward for me and her male friends will show up too. She's never been a violent person so I find this behavior odd from her. I know some of you are telling me to get a room but is that really doable when you have a child with you. Would it be better to just rent out a 2k bedroom and try to get a remote job or will I blow through my money too fast that way?

She’s calling out her Dad and some male friends on you. Take the hint, move, make a plan, execute it…

 

[Gamisch]

There's some points I need to address that I left out. I have been paying her half of the rent for the past 2 years. I have been doing college full time online since covid starting get bad. When she broke the news to me about me getting out things got weird quickly because she said if I stay past that date that her father is gonna come stay at the house and make things very awkward for me and her male friends will show up too. She's never been a violent person so I find this behavior odd from her. I know some of you are telling me to get a room but is that really doable when you have a child with you. Would it be better to just rent out a 2k bedroom and try to get a remote job or will I blow through my money too fast that way?

Before I read this post this was on my mind the entire time. Been through this. Living with a woman until she tells me to leave. And when she feels like you are stalling the situation she'll become exponentially more aggressive, until the police comes every day and they'll kick you out because it becomes a safety issue, kids involved...

OP, I bet this hit you like a sucker punch. Whenever someone will drop a post saying they wanna move into their gf house you'll tell them it's a bad idea and why...I also bet if it was the other way around you'd NEVER do this to her. Yet this is "classic women shyte". On your way to becoming a DJ you now deserve the " dependency badge"; the badge a man gets when he felt save under the regime of a woman.



-dont wait a month; I agree with most posts, that legally she might not even throw you out. Just like she legally cannot send her father and male friends to beat you up. But drastic times..drastic measures.

- friends and /or family ; No time for pride. Find somebody ASAP. A good friend will help you.

-IMPORTANT!!; tell her you'll respect her and you'll leave asap. Takes the venom out of the situation. Dont kiss her azz 24/7 , but take the L while yet you minimally game her. Do more chores . Get groceries. Clean the shower. Leave as peaceful as possible.

- move. Move if possible to a place where rent is more affordable. What makes you wanna stay there, kids?

-Work-to add to last point; cash is great to find a new place, but both cash and work is even better.

I need to be honest, I do feel like you fecked this up yourself. Yes, you save money but when you live with a woman you cannot be in her face 24/7. It will kill all romance. But now is probably not the time to lecture you.

Get out asap and in peace. Do NOT provoke her in any way! Dont argue about whether her decision is legal. Don't text other women even if she does text men around you ,just an example. Hit the gym , or take long walks every day. Go job hunt like crazy. More chores. Hell , buy her fecking flowers if neccessary.

 

[Gamisch]

If she wants to get nasty with him she can weaponize the police and he could end up in jail depending on the type of officer that responds to the call. Especially in America people get the police involved in what should be civil issues. If he even gets charged with a felony for domestic abuse it will make it even more difficult to find a job since most jobs screen for criminal records plus his own daugher could end up in child protective services. If I were him I would try to make this gf happy or get out of there in that 30 days.

Yes , I agree 100 % with this post. It's a little late to start showing your best side, but better late than never. That why my main advice to him is tell her he'll respect her decision.

Maybe the factor kids involved in combination with OP actively job hunting will make her come back on her decision. Or at least she'll might voluntary tell him he has a little more time.