wjh
Master Don Juan
I love the girl, still do, but I'm in pain.
She initiated it, but we both have our problems. She initiated it into "space", and I basically took her confusion and turned it into a break up. I "walked away" so to speak.
I respect her stance, for wanting to make sure that if she gets married to someone, enters into a lease, etc. that she does it with someone she's compatible with and so on. I just thought that the love was strong enough to work through our problems, and move forward. Apparently not. This process has been a week in the making, and now, I no longer have hope.
Killing her in my mind is difficult, since I really care about her, and I'm really hurt on the inside. I don't feel like a Don Juan... To be honest, right now it feels kind of silly to even think about those things.
My problems with her were primarily sexual, she just was too boring in bed and she wasn't sexy enough. Sure, she was really pretty, had a great body, and could be sexy if she wanted to be, but her insecurities were something I could not help her overcome. I look at other girls all the time, and desire them with my loins and all the passion that I've always had. It's the same feelings that initially turned me to this community. I hope that I can keep that perspective and not fall so weak as to completely fall apart emotionally.
She's a great girl, she has a lot going for her, but truthfully we probably wouldn't work in the long run. And for that I guess all I can do is thank her... But I wish it wasn't this way, the pain is there. I loved this girl very, very much. I'll miss the affection the most.
Timing wise, this couldn't be worse. The holidays are here, she just met my whole family a week or so ago, we had plans for New Years, and I've also completely shed my old baggage friends who, albeit had their issues and I needed to get rid of them, would be a crutch for me in the meantime. I'm literally alone (besides my parents, who are difficult to talk to as you can imagine).
I don't know where to start with my feelings. I'm scared to death of jumping into another relationship, so I don't want to date right away. I don't want to get into a relationship JUST for the affection, that's not good enough for me. If I'm going to take this as a learning experience, I need to make sure not get involved with a girl who is affectionate, but not everything else I need.
I'm lost guys... Can you please help with some words?
Also, I work out regularly, that sort of helps, but I'm getting sidetracked at work, and we have a lot of new stresses right now as we were recently acquired. Financially I'm not in a bad place, but if I was fired I would be on the edge very quickly. I'm scared, and I fear I placed too much of my happiness on this one girl.
She initiated it, but we both have our problems. She initiated it into "space", and I basically took her confusion and turned it into a break up. I "walked away" so to speak.
I respect her stance, for wanting to make sure that if she gets married to someone, enters into a lease, etc. that she does it with someone she's compatible with and so on. I just thought that the love was strong enough to work through our problems, and move forward. Apparently not. This process has been a week in the making, and now, I no longer have hope.
Killing her in my mind is difficult, since I really care about her, and I'm really hurt on the inside. I don't feel like a Don Juan... To be honest, right now it feels kind of silly to even think about those things.
My problems with her were primarily sexual, she just was too boring in bed and she wasn't sexy enough. Sure, she was really pretty, had a great body, and could be sexy if she wanted to be, but her insecurities were something I could not help her overcome. I look at other girls all the time, and desire them with my loins and all the passion that I've always had. It's the same feelings that initially turned me to this community. I hope that I can keep that perspective and not fall so weak as to completely fall apart emotionally.
She's a great girl, she has a lot going for her, but truthfully we probably wouldn't work in the long run. And for that I guess all I can do is thank her... But I wish it wasn't this way, the pain is there. I loved this girl very, very much. I'll miss the affection the most.
Timing wise, this couldn't be worse. The holidays are here, she just met my whole family a week or so ago, we had plans for New Years, and I've also completely shed my old baggage friends who, albeit had their issues and I needed to get rid of them, would be a crutch for me in the meantime. I'm literally alone (besides my parents, who are difficult to talk to as you can imagine).
I don't know where to start with my feelings. I'm scared to death of jumping into another relationship, so I don't want to date right away. I don't want to get into a relationship JUST for the affection, that's not good enough for me. If I'm going to take this as a learning experience, I need to make sure not get involved with a girl who is affectionate, but not everything else I need.
I'm lost guys... Can you please help with some words?
Also, I work out regularly, that sort of helps, but I'm getting sidetracked at work, and we have a lot of new stresses right now as we were recently acquired. Financially I'm not in a bad place, but if I was fired I would be on the edge very quickly. I'm scared, and I fear I placed too much of my happiness on this one girl.
