was too aggressive on first date, how to recover?

[kman1]

so, is this a dead situation or what?

- went on a date, everything went real well until the end.
- started making out with her. she liked it, even telling me i'm a good kisser.
- on cab ride home, i got a little frisky, but didn't force anything. she is very conservative, but i didn't know it at the time
- turns out that she thought i was being to aggressive, although on my scale of aggressiveness, i give that a 3. done way more in the past, to positive results i might add.
- didn't apologize the next day to her for it, since i didn't know she was even upset. she never said anything to me.
- asked her out again, no response
- her roommate calls me and tells me she is pissed and doesn't want to talk to me.
- i sent her an email apologizing for being too forward. no response yet.

so, the game plan now is basically to wait and see if she accepts the apology. if she does, great. if not, next. but, is there anything else i should be doing here?

 

[DJDamage]

if she does, great. if not, next. but, is there anything else i should be doing here?

Whatever you do, don't do this:

- i sent her an email apologizing for being too forward. no response yet.

Now you dug yourself a bigger hole by confirming that you were too aggrassive.

 

[MacDiddy]

you shouldn't have apologised... she's confused and doesn't know what she wants. just pretend her being upset never happened and just pretend that she is one of many baying for your affections.

 

[Poonani Maker]

Once while in high school I gave this gal (who wanted me while I did not necessarily want her - a little too fat/smoked/short) a bunch of hickies on her neck and tits at a party. She was upset about it the next day, and I acted like, "You asked for it. You shouldn't have taken me back into Haley's room to throw me on the bed and start kissing me. You know we'd had a lot to drink last night, at least I did and don't really remember what happened."

 

[Pro]

As soon as the room mate called that is killing it, get on with the NEXT! -->

 

[ConantheLibertarian]

Yeah big mistake apologizing. You basically pleaded guilty to a crime you didn't committ.

 

[COD]

TIME-wait a few days/weeks........call her like its not big deal.

go back in time-after you made out.......and want to take it up a notch.....stop and leave her wanting more. She gave you an inch and U took a mile. No chick is going to do ya in the cab ride. It takes on a trampy persona........chics will bang the living s hit out of you if done smoothly. U created the trampy vibe.........S-L-O-W D-O-W-N. THE BEST ADVICE IS ONE YOU GAVE YOURSELF.........move on, date other women. Fools rush in.....date a few women, and I know this is hard but who cares if you dont get laid that night........set them up for date 2 or 3.

Once you create that trust, build that rapport.........the sex will come, but not if they feel trampy.

So next time.........slow down and wait until you are private.

 

[Raikojo17]

TIME-wait a few days/weeks........call her like its not big deal.

go back in time-after you made out.......and want to take it up a notch.....stop and leave her wanting more. She gave you an inch and U took a mile. No chick is going to do ya in the cab ride. It takes on a trampy persona........chics will bang the living s hit out of you if done smoothly. U created the trampy vibe.........S-L-O-W D-O-W-N. THE BEST ADVICE IS ONE YOU GAVE YOURSELF.........move on, date other women. Fools rush in.....date a few women, and I know this is hard but who cares if you dont get laid that night........set them up for date 2 or 3.

Once you create that trust, build that rapport.........the sex will come, but not if they feel trampy.

So next time.........slow down and wait until you are private.

listen to this man.

be patient, run your game,kino, and enjoy yourself above all else. dont worry, the sexy stuff will come.

 

[mrRuckus]

What kind of children are you going out with?

She's sitting at home brooding about something no one has any reason to care about and having her roommate call you? The question isn't "how do I recover." It's "what the hell is wrong with me that I want to go out with an immature little brat?"



I HATE THE WORD "UPSET."

 

[kman1]

well, anyway - she wrote me back and said that she felt like i thought she was cheap, but my apology made her think that it might have been in her head. she just wants to put it past us and go out again. i guess the apology worked. now i just gotta figure out how i'm ever going to get in her pants, cuz you know that's gonna be extra hard now. dammit!

 

[MacDiddy]

This is why your apology has set you back from achieving the end game. It might have accelerated the re-establishment of contact but it has done you a dis-service. she now expects you to play by her beat when all you want is to get in her pants. and just don't settle for a relationship cause that is whats on offer. You make whats on offer..

 

[DJDamage]

This is why your apology has set you back from achieving the end game. It might have accelerated the re-establishment of contact but it has done you a dis-service. she now expects you to play by her beat when all you want is to get in her pants. and just don't settle for a relationship cause that is whats on offer. You make whats on offer..

You better listen to MacDiddy advice kman1, just because things seemed to have worked, doesn't mean they worked because you appologized, there are other factors at work here.

 

[Obsidian]

i guess the apology worked.

yeah, before I read this, I was already gonna disagree with several posters: I think the apology was fine. Most girls respond well to aggression so aggression is usually good. If you come off as too aggressive, tho, an easy way to recover is to apologize.

After that, don't fully let up, just take things a little easier. If a period of time goes by and she still isn't living up to your physical standards, then next her and move on to someone who will.

 

[MacDiddy]

The apology has already taught the cat a new trick... That is, get upset, create drama, get friend to act as go between, and sit and wait for an apology and resulting supplication...

 

[Scorched]

"- i sent her an email apologizing for being too forward. no response yet."

The apology has already taught the cat a new trick... That is, get upset, create drama, get friend to act as go between, and sit and wait for an apology and resulting supplication...

Nailed it.

If you want to **** this girl, you've got to play the game like never before...
Let her ask you out and turn her down at first, "well I'm busy then, maybe the next day?"
Seriously step up the game...