Was this a BPD experience ? CRAZY story

[iKrzys]

I understand this is a long post but I would really appreciate if someone took some time to help
me out
I can't believe what I went through

Would be awesome gain some insight from people with a similar experience

Anyways

Here is a big chunk of our history


We started off as co workers in oreilly auto parts
In the beginning she started flirting with me and I became interested so I started flirting back


We started hanging out and becoming closer together
We were really good friends for about 6 months

Around the end of the year,she asks me to go to Her friends house NYE 2012-2013
I agree to go
Middle of the night at 12 am she lunges towards me and kisses me
This makes me think she wants to be closer


A week goes by and we end up going to a work party together
At the end of the night while driving her home,she asks me if I want to know something funny.
I'm like sure what is it?

She asks me do I know how much she wants to ###$ me

Me having feelings for her made me think this is next step towards a relationship

What was really weird was she said she didn't want to hurt me
I asked what she meant by this but she never explained
Anyways at her house and we end up having sex for a little
We end up getting closer and hitting it off a couple times
I asked her is this a friend with benefits thing and she said she doesn't do that

So a couple weeks later,during her closing shift,I decide to bring her flowers and ask her maybe if she would be interested in being more than friends and start dating

The look in her face was as if I was a random asking her out and she told me that she doesn't know what she wants
At this moment I felt led on
Making out with me,having sex with me,hanging out and texting like a couple,all while flirting with me and she doesn't know what she wants?
What the hell is up with that?


Next couple weeks of work were torture having to see her after that
I kept asking her what the heck is your problem
She told me she doesn't want to hurt me
Obviosuly she didn't notice that she already did hurt me

Working as coworkers and going through all of that
She continued to visit me at the end of her shift and continued talking to me and flirting with me as if nothing even happened

I started to meet new people that told me she is a big flirt and just likes to mess around with guys
I figured out she was talking to multiple guys while leading me on
I would take her phone from her just as a joke and she would do anything to get it back
I should have taken this as advice and just left the girl alone
She claimed she was single so she can do whatever she wants

I started to look for a new job because I couldn't stand how hurt and led on I felt
I decided to give my two week notice since I found a new job

Around this time,she invites me over to her house
She decides to ask me out
I was hesitant at first and asked her to give me some time to figure things out
A week goes by and I decided to forgive her and accepted it
We started going out 5/12/13
However the same night we started dating
She told me if anything happens can we be friends
One can only imagine how it feels to be asked this question the same day you get asked out
Like what the fukc?

Any ways I forgave and
Next couple months were amazing
We were in love
We acted as a amazing couple and had regular couple activities

From may-dec 2013 everything was going good.
Actually very good
I got a candle from her that she wrote
"I love you,Always and forever<3 <3 <3"
It made me feel amazing
The time flew by so fast
We spent so much time together
Walking her gods very often and I loved it
She was attending school
I was attending school and we still found time for ourselves
My last day of classes was Dec 12 2013

This was the day we last had sex
This means we had no sex for year and a half from today
This was the turning point for us
We continued being together
I loved her and wanted to work the intimacy issues out but she never wanted to do anything about it and this is what got me fed up
I tried talking to her to see,If her feelings changed or if she is no longer attracted to me
She said she loved me and it's because of problems like her weight why we don't have sex
I wanted to help her and I understood
However it seemed as if I was the one ever doing anything about it
About a week before we broke up
She went to a doctor and bitched me out for having to pay $40
I was like wtf
I'm trying to help you and you treat me like this?
I even offered to pay and I think it made her feel stupid for how she acted

Anyways
For Valentine's Day 2014
I made a plan to take her keys from purse to open up her car and place flowers and a ring to surprise her
At the end of her shift,she opened her car and was surprised
However while going inside,one of my friends told her happy vday and she said she isn't really feeling it
My heart dropped when i heard this
Eventually I let it go and forgot about it

Next couple months go by and she gets a new job
I was so happy for her
It was a job where she gets to work with dogs and cats
Being a dog trainer is her passion and I actually talked to her that I would love to open up a business together someday
She was very interested and we would often talk about it

She started the job in nov 2014 and currently works there up in till we broke up
We started seeing each other less because her schedule consisted of closing shifts which were 1-9
My schedule is a set schedule that is 5:30-4pm and I'm off weekends
She worked weekends however so it was difficult to see her

During this span,I would text her and she started becoming distant
Claiming that she doesn't have time to text me and can't text me
Later on I figured out she was texting during her work shift so she lied to me
I have caught her in multiple lies and have been told she is a liar by people that know her from the past
For some reason I was never hesitant and always trusted her
I just didn't think she was the type of person to lie to me

I loved her for who she is and what she looks like and I never had a problem with her weight or anything else
Even though she knew this,many things came out of here mouth that I could not understand why she said these things to me

She would tell me she wants to go under a rock and die because she is hideous
That she is worthless
She always asked me if I love her
Faked breaking up with me countless of times
She walked out of my car and slammed the car door and said she is done and than within minutes apologizing and saying she is a bad person
Treated me like $#%^ countless times
Had Crazy mood swings
Yelled at me at her home and in public and many more things that made me very confused

Honestly there was many times I was about to call it quits but her mom was very helping and would explain to me why she acts these ways

The weird thing is
She has two different personalities
when she is at home and when she is out with her friends/coworkers

Around her friends
She has this personality of being down to earth
Me knowing this got me to the point where I was jealous whenever I hung out with her around other people
I saw how she was around them and than hated how she was around me behind closed doors
I could not understand
Totally unfair and hurt me because the way she treats people outside of her family is the way I was treated at one point

Around people that she loves
Like me her mom and her dad
She treats us way different than she does her friends
Towards us she screams and shouts and says rude things
Her dad is the one that she treats like complete $#%^
I can't understand why she talks down to him the way she does
This is her biological father so maybe because of her moms first divorce?
I don't know
I asked her and she told me she yells at him because he doesn't listen

Anyways she started having problems with me
Really weird because she always said she is very happy with me

She always told me how come I don't do this and that but
She wanted to meet my parents more and I tried to make this happen
I had many things going on such as class's for my cdl and errand I had to run
She has met my parents twice
I admit that but I wanted for her to meet them more but I was afraid if she treats me the way she does
How will she treat me in front of them ?

My parents are also very busy people
They own 4 homes and they are barely ever home so it was a conflict to have her meet them with her schedule and mine
There was days I could have invited her but if our relationship was going towards $#%^
Why would I want to have her around my parents
She was already pretending to break up with me plenty of times and telling me she is done and she gives up
It's like treat her like a gf but how does she expect me to go out places with her if she treats me this way?
Add in the fact that we have no emotional attachment due to the lack of intimacy
No kissing No sex No foreplay for me
However she let me only play with her but if I wanted something she said you only do this for me because you want me to do something for you
What do you think was going on in my mind ?
It's like straight up emotional abuse
Am I not good enough for you ?
Do I suck in bed?
Are you not into me?

Hell it even got to the point where I asked her towards the end of the relationship does she want another guy in the bed or a free pass to have fun
I would have agreed if it would make her happy
I didn't expect the relationship to go on but I kept trying to fix and work on things

She started comparing me to other people and our relationship to other couples relationships
How they take pictures and we don't
I have tried taking pictures but she always said she looked like $#%^ so eventually I stopped trying and I admit that
I had my times where I was self conscious and didn't want to take any pictures

 

[iKrzys]

She complained that I won't let her spend time with her friends
I had no problem about this
In the beginning of the relationship
I was hanging out with a old friend of mine that was a girl and she told me that's not right
So from then on I didn't hang out with friends that are girls
She complained that she can't hang out with guy friends but I never stopped her from doing so
I just said how is it fair that I can't do that but you can
She told me back than she thought differently
I started talking to some of my girl friends from back in the day and whenever I told her
She would rage at me

I think this might have been what effected her the most
Recently her mom has been divorced for the second time after spending 18years with the man

She compares me to him
That I'll leave her just like he did to her mom
That we both are similar
And both have same personalities

Even though we are two completely different people
I'm 22 and he is in his 50s
Two different people
Like what the heck you know

Throughout the course of the relationship
I have always done things for her and her mom
Her mom has a back problem and I loved to help both of them out
The step dad was a truck driver so if he wasn't around
I was glad to help out

I mowed the lawn,
shoveled the snow,
raked the leaves,
washed the dishes
took care of their house for a month while they went to Poland
helped around the house with gardening,
building a wooden fence ,
helping them take everything out of their basement after it flooded
Took care of errands
Brought over many groceries without even asking
Called places to take care of things for her
Did car maintenance
Went on regular walks with the dogs
Fixed electronics for them
And many many more things

I understand that there are problems that I caused
But I always was trying to work and fix things
Just alone the fact that I spent a year and a half without sex should mean I love her
I never cheated and I can say this from the bottom of my heart
Do the many things I did for them not show that I love her
Who does things for someone else if they are not serious about them

Around middle of may she called me at 11pm
She accused me of being in bed and keeping a girl quite
She literally said I'm ######6 a ***** and why am I keeping her quite

Holy $#%^ was pissed
I decided to tell her goodnight and hung up
She wrote me a lovely poem but I appreciated it but it doesn't change the fact that you showed that you don't trust me

In July
I was helping the step dad build a fence before he left to Poland
It was during a couple 90 degree days where we both worked hard and sweated during the hot temps
I loaded the pickup truck with easily more than 2000lbs of wood
Every piece of wood went through my hands
Splinters and chemicals on my hands since it was treated wood
I didn't ask for nothing because it was for my gf and her mom
I did other things around the house such to during this time such as yard work

I really didn't expect to be let go in the next month

Around this time we also went fishing twice
Once with my friends and once with her dad
The day we went with my friends
She was holding my hand and skipping next to me telling me how much she loves me
It was amazing
I felt awesome

We went fishing with her dad and we had a pretty good trip
She put up a Facebook post that she is fishing with me,tata(dad) and her
In the status she posted she was feeling happy

During this time she was treating me like $#%^ and we were having arguments

Literally out of no where
I got a text a work where
She asked for a break not to long ago and she gave me the reason that she wants to work on herself and be better for me

I didn't want a break so I talked to her about it
Than she wanted space
I tried giving her space but it was so hard not to text her
I didn't text her as much as normal but I did ask what exactly do you mean by space
Like no contact at all
She said that's what she wanted but in like how can you want no contact with me because you want to work on your weight which is something I have no problem with at all
I told her I don't mind you going to the gym
I even offered to pay for her membership and for the past year I was asking her to go to the gym with me

 

[iKrzys]

Little by little
I started pulling out more information from her
That a part of her doesn't she us together anymore
She also told me in the beginning I was driving her to classes to get over her ex before me
Around when she asked for the break, she told me she still has dreams about her ex I don't know if she was trying to annoy me or hurt me
So that's great
Your saying I was a rebound and your still having dreams about him ?
Awesome

I told her I really don't want to be with someone that doesn't know what they want and doesn't see a future with me

I understand we argued but that is because I was tired of working on things by myself and her never wanting to try to fix things
I was a doormat and tried to be excepting but I could no longer take it

My decision was wither we break up and go our seperate ways
Or we both give it out all
I told her this
She asked to be friends
I told her I can't due to what she has put me through

She decided that she wanted to both give it our all

It did not seem like she wanted to give it her all so I talked to her about meeting up and finally deciding what is best

We decided to talk after work
We talked about everything
I wanted to work things out
She wanted to just give up and end the relationship
She thought it was the best choice

She said maybe we should date other people and if it's meant to be than it will be
Thanks for giving up

So we decided to end it even though it's what I didn't want but couldn't force her

We went our seperate ways and I met her at her house just to make sure she is ok after the drive home and that she didn't hurt herself or anything
Before she was about to go inside her hide
She said she doesn't know if this is the right choice so she wanted to talk the next day after work
She cried so much and told me she doesn't want to lose me
I never saw her cry so much as I did in this one night

Next day came
I called her a couple times
She answered in a aggravated tone and I asked her do you still want to talk since I valued her opinion
She said no she doesn't want to and she hung up because she had to go to work

I went to her mothers workplace and talked to her and her mother guaranteed that she does not want to break up
Her mom told me to give her time
So I texted her that I'll give you time
And write When you need me let me know

A day or two went by and
I was uncertain if we were already broken up for sure since she wanted to talk the next day after we technically broke up
I decide to call her and she didn't answer
I went to her house Saturday and tried talking to her
She was mad that I wrote I'll give her time but here I am next day trying to talk to her
I tried talking to her about what her choice was because it was bothering me so much but knowing what is going on

She had plans to go out with her friend Saturday night so she told me to come by sunday since she is having a bbq and later going to a friends house for a bonfire
I texted her later that night asking if it's ok if I come at this and this time since I had a funeral wake to attend to and I didn't know what time she is going to the bonfire

She never replied so I never came by
I thought that it was a sign she doesn't want to talk and kind of left me hanging

She got my hopes up at the end by telling me her cousin and her bf took 4 breaks and they were dating other people

One of my close friends happens to know her cousin and out of curiosity asked her if this is true
Her cousin became mad and said that none of that is true
She texted my ex asking her why she's making #######4 up
My ex claimed that she never said that and denied ever saying it and said that I making stuff up because I'm hurt

When I figured out she lied
I texted her after a four weeks of no contact
And called her out for lying

She told me that she didn't deny saying that
I took pictures of our messages and I showed them to her cousin and her cousin said that she is a big liar
Why would you tell me lies to get my hopes up and lead me on
I didn't mean to put her on blast but she accused me of being hurt and I don't want my friend to look bad either

I have heard she is saying
That supposedly we weren't seeing eye to eye and that we grew apart
What couple doesn't grow apart if there is no emotional or physical intimacy for a year and half ?
I made sure to ask her how she feels about me and she always insisted that she loves me and wants to make love but she can't
Maybe she was lying and just leading me on hoping she would find a spark somewhere down the road ?

She also lied to me that she can't text at work but when I saw her phone one day she had like 10 contacts texting her throughout her workday so she lied to me about that

What the heck did I go through

I'm so confused
Did she ever love me or was she just stringing me along and she wanted to be friends incase she couldn't find anything better

I love this girl for everything she was and excepted her for all her flaws
According gone of her friends,
She is already currently talking to other guys so I feel like she never even loved me

 

[iKrzys]

How is it possible for her to move on like that on the unless she emotionally detached yourself way before she tried breaking up with me

Her mom's second husband left her after being together for 18 years

He told me I would have a hard life with them and to really think about if I really want to be with them

Her mom supposedly said Sex makes her feel like she is weak and hasn't put out for him in years
Similar to how me and my ex didn't have sex for 18 months
I always asked her if there is someone else or has she lost feeling for me
She always insisted that she did not and that it was her problem and nothing to do with me

Her mom also asked me three months ago to move-in help them pay their mortgage since her husband is leaving
I thought to myself am I just being used ?

I love her I miss her but I know I cannot go back she has done too much pain and I can't forgive her
I wanted to give her space
Everyone deserves space
But give me a legit reason
She wanted to be best friends again

How do you be best friends when she already broke my trust and lied to me countless times
Let alone the fact that she is kind of friend zoning me
It's like a huge smack to my face

She always insisted she was happy and when times where good they really were good

I went crazy and literally deleted everything that deals with her of my Facebook and gathered everything she ever gave me in a box
I guess it's my way of moving on as fast as possible
Basically forgive and forget

The step dad told me it would be tough living with them
I know he was being honest now

He told me that my exs mom hasn't put out for him in a while
Supposedly she feels weak for having sex
Makes no sense if two people really love each other
Her mom also admitted to me that she wants gave the step dad a silent treatment for half a year
I didn't want to believe it but why would she Lie
This is the lady that told me she looks at me as her son in law and claims to always tell people good things about me
I wonder if this was true
I'll never know

The mom did help me manage her daughters behavior
She told me her daughter does things such as
Scapegoating
Black and white thinking
Projecting blame onto others
And that she expects me to read her mind and know what she wants
Kind of like a mommy role where the mom is to figure out what the child wants

The daughter told me she was in a psych ward
I still accepted her
I understood she had a rough childhood and things happen
Not the one to judge just because she was in a psych ward
She told me she had body dysmorphia and suffered from depression and major anxiety
I was understanding and tried to be the best I could be for her

Everyone gets depressed at times and I understand
No matter how many times she claimed she wants to crawl under neath a rock a die,I told her she is beautiful and not to do that because it would be self fish
Why do that to me ,her mom , and her father

She told me she pushed all her past boyfriends away and for some reason I thought thy she really loved me and I wouldn't encounter the same faith

She also told me she wants to get rid of this hatred
I remember looking at her like what does she mean by this ?

She always accused me of being a victim
That I criticize her

Perhaps this was projection of how much she hates her self into me ?


The daughter always told me she is a bad person and that she doesn't deserve me and why am I even with her
I always explained and had no problem
I asked her for about a year to open up to me
Even her mom asked her to be honest with me
I remember one day I grabbed her and tried to kiss her on the cheek and take a picture with her
She literally started crying in the mirror
I tried to comfort her but she pushed me away
There was times where she had to take a Xanax to go see a movie with me
I was furious but I understood

That's the thing that hurts the most
I feel like I could see her soul and understand her
Kind of seems like if there is this girl I fell in love with deep inside of her but she just puts on a mask around others
Like a girl that is confused
Doesn't really know who she is
Maybe I'm over thinking things
But who knows
Maybe I'll never figure out and I will in the future

I really hope she finds herself and I pray for her to reach out to me

It takes two people to work things out though
I know I gave it my all and there was nothing else I can possible give

It's like if I was on a roller coaster where the good times were awesome but the bad times were horrible
I feel as if maybe she realized what she put me though and she just wanted to push me away for me to help myself
I just can't grasp why do this to someone why loves you


The mother told me she was the same way when she was younger and that its her fault that the daughter is like this
That supposedly she never raised her the proper way

She told me that the daughter would kill herself if the mother ever passed away
I understand that they have a deep bond but how is that fair if I was to get married with her
People die of natural causes and she would just leave me if this was to happen ?

It's like
Now after I re read this at about 2 months after the breakup
It seems like I was part of a movie and some things seem unreal



Led on in the beginning
Busted my balls throughout
Only to be tossed to the side and she tried leading me on again in the end by giving me false hope about her cousins breaks that just were lies
What the ###$ ???

What did I do to deserve this
Never even bothered to reach out to she how I was doing
Shows me how much she didn't want to lose me and how much of a fresh start she wanted with me

I wish nobody to have a experience like this
I rather be physical hurt since i have bruises and I heal
Emotional pain is no joke
Let alone the fact that a feel like a little *****
This will defiantly make me stronger and aware of things

Emotional abuse really messes with you
Nobody can understand the depression that I went though after the breakup
I'm actually proud of myself for getting though this in about 2 months
I'm 22 and I just bought a house and a new car

I'm just in shock and need help analyzing things

Also this is a big give away

Her mom asked her multiple times
How can you love your boyfriend if you don't even love yourself ?

Literally two weeks before we broke up
She was holding my hand and skipping saying she loves me

Through out the relationship
She would consistently ask if I loved her
She always would cuddle up to me and want me to hug her


It's possible she strung me along
But I never will really know
I have been no contact for about 2 months and I'm not going to break it to figure out
She lied to me at the end to get my hopes up

So basically she didn't know what she wanted in the beginning and at the end
Such a heartbreaking experience
I think it's distributing to even ask if we can be best friends and start over after all that
Like did she not realize everything she put me through ?

 

[iKrzys]

In the beginning,we would have sex very often
I understand that was probably during the idealization phase
She would do anything sexual during this time
As time went on
She told me so no longer wanted to do this or that and always gave me excuses

I think a big give away is how the stepdad told me that the mother claims she feels weak when she is intimate

She probably was to afraid of engulfment especially since it was her second husband


My ex told me she wants to make love to me but she can't
That's very weird
She liked doing crazy things such as me being rough but I guess once we started having more normal sex
Like making love is when she shut down

She also had many problems with her self image so that has a big impact on her self esteem as well



Now that I think about it
They have 3 dogs which they always claimed that they love them unconditionally no matter how the dog is treated

The daughter also had a stuffed cow that she slept with all the time
This cow was given to her when she was a young girl when the mother and father were going through her moms first divorce
From what I understand
The cow went every where with her


I believe I heard her talking to the cow once

It's also ironic that she doesn't eat beef
She told me she saw a cow and she feel in love with them and that why she doesn't eat them

I'm guessing maybe since she is attached to this stuffed cow
That it has something to do with her not eating beef


She also had a tendency to love watching little kid movies
Like cartoons and Disney

Her mom once told me that my ex thinks dating is like the fairy tales in those movies
Possible this shows that she was frozen at some age and she never was emotional developed therefore all the anger management and similarities to a little kid she has ?

A little kid can say they hate there parents even though she loves them
Kind is similar to how she would say horrible things to me only to realize it hurt me and apologize

She also has problems receiving gifts
It was as if she didn't know how to accept them or what to do with them


I got her a promise ring with a heart on it and she didn't like it at first
I read that jewelry sometimes makes the BPD feel engulfed when it has heart signs on it


The more I read about BPD
The more things start to click


I think the craziest is that she told me she pushed all her past bfs away and that she was the one to make them break up with her



After all of this
I have realized I have big codependency issues
I trusted this person with my heart and finally at the end I caught her in her lies

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

You must've spent hours typing up all that. After a reading the first paragraphs you know what you need to do?... Get a new *****.

She just wanted to f*cl and you got attached in the beginning. You should have just left it that way. Let the girls press a relationship not you.

Take some time to get over your feelings and then go out and meet more girls.

 

[HariPoter13]

By the amount of text you've written, I can tell that you're really emotionally hurt. And the things you wrote. You remind me of me. Go find a good psychiatrist who knows how to deal with BPD and talk to him. Tell him your gf/exgf is BPD.


And yes, big codependency issues. And maybe something more than that...


It's possible she strung me along

Not necessarily. She is emotionally unstable, which means that her thinking and wants change just as fast as her emotions. She can love you one minute, then be indifferent 5 minutes later. And don't try to fix her. You can't. Accept that. You're probably of the people pleaser type, that's why you were so attracted to her.


I really hope she finds herself and I pray for her to reach out to me

Forget about it for your own sanity. Accept the fact that it will NEVER work out. Let go. Sometimes letting go is the hardest thing to do, but it needs to be done. Don't hold on.

 

[iKrzys]

By the amount of text you've written, I can tell that you're really emotionally hurt. And the things you wrote. You remind me of me. Go find a good psychiatrist who knows how to deal with BPD and talk to him. Tell him your gf/exgf is BPD.


And yes, big codependency issues. And maybe something more than that...


It's possible she strung me along

Not necessarily. She is emotionally unstable, which means that her thinking and wants change just as fast as her emotions. She can love you one minute, then be indifferent 5 minutes later. And don't try to fix her. You can't. Accept that. You're probably of the people pleaser type, that's why you were so attracted to her.


I really hope she finds herself and I pray for her to reach out to me

Forget about it for your own sanity. Accept the fact that it will NEVER work out. Let go. Sometimes letting go is the hardest thing to do, but it needs to be done. Don't hold on.

I have done research and I'm defiantly co dependent
I know for a fact she loved me because she did things for me that showed me she cared


Honestly I thought about leaving a couple times

I even asked her did she lose feelings for me
If there is any one else
Is she happy for me

She always claimed yes she is happyy and she wouldn't be with someone if she didn't want to be with me


The sex issue I read that BPD are afraid of intimacy
The more they love you
The harder it is for them to be intimate because they are afraid of being hurt

Honestly if it wasn't for her mom
I would have left a while ago
Her mom always helped me understand her and eve she claimed she looks at me as a son in law


I know I shouldn't try to save her
A part of me has feelings for her still
That how I know I'm capable of loving


The first time we actually had sex,it hurt her
I'm assuming that because we were close friends and she already had feelings for me


I'm defiantly hurt but it it comes down to me accepting that there was nothing I can do

Like her own mom said
She would have done this to anyone

 

[iKrzys]

You must've spent hours typing up all that. After a reading the first paragraphs you know what you need to do?... Get a new *****.

She just wanted to f*cl and you got attached in the beginning. You should have just left it that way. Let the girls press a relationship not you.

Take some time to get over your feelings and then go out and meet more girls.

I don't think it's that she wanted to just have sex
She literally was spending every day with me
I asked her if this is a FWB thing and she said she doesn't do that

 

[Bible_Belt]

You being a giant AFC does not make her BPD.

 

[iKrzys]

You being a giant AFC does not make her BPD.

Actually I had like 4 options when I first started talking to this girl
Read about BPD and than maybe you would understand something

The girl told me she was in a psych ward
Everything else matches it


Lol at 11000 messages
It's always the guys that spend the most time on here that are the least helpful

 

[Tictac]

TL/DR

When posts come with chapters, I couldn't care any less.

This is SoSuave.net not harlequinromance.com

 

[iKrzys]

TL/DR

When posts come with chapters, I couldn't care any less.

This is SoSuave.net not harlequinromance.com

Well don't bother replying than
Why waste your time

Thanks to those who have replied

 

[Bible_Belt]

Actually I had like 4 options when I first started talking to this girl
Read about BPD and than maybe you would understand something

The girl told me she was in a psych ward
Everything else matches it


Lol at 11000 messages
It's always the guys that spend the most time on here that are the least helpful

Your girl is holding a job and going to school. I'm yet to see a bpd girl who has accomplished anything like that. The only ones who appear successful from the outside are actually mooching off a man (or men) and burning through his money. Most of them are tattooed druggie fvckup baby factories.

There are a lot more types of mental illness than BPD. It is not a generic term for "crazy b!tch." It is a very specific mental disorder, with a specific set of traits.

And if you can't see how much you reek of AFC-ness, there is no helping you yet.

 

[iKrzys]

By the amount of text you've written, I can tell that you're really emotionally hurt. And the things you wrote. You remind me of me. Go find a good psychiatrist who knows how to deal with BPD and talk to him. Tell him your gf/exgf is BPD.


And yes, big codependency issues. And maybe something more than that...


It's possible she strung me along

Not necessarily. She is emotionally unstable, which means that her thinking and wants change just as fast as her emotions. She can love you one minute, then be indifferent 5 minutes later. And don't try to fix her. You can't. Accept that. You're probably of the people pleaser type, that's why you were so attracted to her.


I really hope she finds herself and I pray for her to reach out to me

Forget about it for your own sanity. Accept the fact that it will NEVER work out. Let go. Sometimes letting go is the hardest thing to do, but it needs to be done. Don't hold on.

Your girl is holding a job and going to school. I'm yet to see a bpd girl who has accomplished anything like that. The only ones who appear successful from the outside are actually mooching off a man (or men) and burning through his money. Most of them are tattooed druggie fvckup baby factories.

There are a lot more types of mental illness than BPD. It is not a generic term for "crazy b!tch." It is a very specific mental disorder, with a specific set of traits.

And if you can't see how much you reek of AFC-ness, there is no helping you yet.

There are high functioning BPDs and low function BPDs

Actually she isn't in school
Has been out of college for a year

Like I said
She fits many of these traits
I read other people's stories and they are similar to mine

She called herself crazy

All I asked for help and what others think
Keep saying what you want to say
Thanks for replying though

 

[Tictac]

You being a giant AFC does not make her BPD.

_________

Coda.

 

[iKrzys]

_________

Coda.

Lol

Keep adding posts to your tally
Who spends 7 years on a Internet forum ?
Lmfao

 

[Tictac]

Who writes a 5-part essay because he's such a giant p*ssy that he thinks a woman that diddled him is BPD?

 

[El Payaso]

You just wrote a textbook.

 

[marmel75]

I'm not sure who has more issues...you or her.

Seems like you are lacking in the testosterone department.

I cannot believe a man would allow a woman to control him like that.

Sack up bro.