Walking away literally, good or bad?

[tryst type]

i've been in a year long relationship where recently my gf has been working two jobs and seems to have made that the focus of attention. when we are together it's almost as she's not present and tires easily.

we got into a little fight about it online, where it basically ended in me saying how i didn't feel important to her. in mid arguement i got the urge to just walk away and not look back without filling her in. went something like this

(mid argument online)
me - i love you, goodbye
her - don't even say you love me right now when you barely say it
me - you're too oblivious to realize i do, so what's saying it more going to prove? goodbye
her - what does that even mean "goodbye?"
her - hello?
her - ignoring me now?

i just stopped responding. if i simply just start ignoring her from now on phone/email/etc instead of properly breaking things off, would this work in my favor?

 

[Jeffst1980]

When we talk about walking away, it's usually done to girls that don't make the grade early on.

An example of walking away: You have a second date with a girl and she's paying more attention to her blackberry than to you. You end the date and don't call her any more.

or,
A girl acts deliberately flaky or emotional to manipulate you, or is a "game player." You stop taking her calls altogether, because any reaction out of you will just feed her need for attention and drama.

What you did isn't "walking away." You're just withdrawing communications in the hopes of raising her interest level. If you do this abruptly, as you did, it comes off as reactionary and sulking. If you want any chance at raising interest level, you need to withdraw GRADUALLY, just as girls gradually lose interest. As it stands now, she holds all the power, and you're acting a bit like an insecure girlfriend.

When you "walk away," it means you MOVE ON. For real.

If you want to end things, you owe her an explanation, or at least a statement of intent. It's been a year, after all. Telling her, "We don't seem to be connecting anymore, so I think we should break up" is enough.

If you don't want to break up with her, you need to reestablish yourself as the powerful one in the relationship ASAP. Do this by gradually withdrawing and spending more time on your own, without her, while making the time you DO spend with her count. It gets harder after a year, but she should be looking forward to spending time with you, and she won't if you act whiny, whether justified or not.

Don't waste time doing things with her that won't make her interested in you. #1 on this list is arguing.

 

[Mr. Me]

What do you mean by "work in your favor"? What is it you're trying to achieve?

 

[tryst type]

while making the time you DO spend with her count.

lately when we hang out, she's so tired from working all day that i feel the littlest of my actions will annoy her and she'll see me as the problem rather than being too focused on work.

we had spent 4 nights in a row together and tonight she tells me to come see her because it felt as if she hasnt seen me at all even though she did. this is what i mean by her focus being at work. but to her she thinks the relationship is different even after realizing she works too much and is sleepy when we hang out. what to do?

 

[( . )( . )]

Don't waste time doing things with her that won't make her interested in you. #1 on this list is arguing.

#2 is talking online after you been with her for a year, I mean literally what is the point?

#3 is throwing the word "love" around and then getting all hissy with her classic chick comeback with words like "you're too oblivious to realize i do"...doing this over the internet is thrice as gay, ties in with #1

 

[window]

sounds like you're spending too much time with this girl and starting to resent her. Just cut back the time you spend with her and don't be available all the time...she'll come around.

 

[tryst type]

lately when we hang out, she's so tired from working all day that i feel the littlest of my actions will annoy her and she'll see me as the problem rather than being too focused on work.

we had spent 4 nights in a row together and tonight she tells me to come see her because it felt as if she hasnt seen me at all even though she did. this is what i mean by her focus being at work. but to her she thinks the relationship is different even after realizing she works too much and is sleepy when we hang out. what to do?

 

[NewMan]

i've been in a year long relationship where recently my gf has been working two jobs and seems to have made that the focus of attention. when we are together it's almost as she's not present and tires easily.

You sound like a chick - seriously. that's something my GF would say to me.

Stop being so sensitive.

It's not like she is ignoring you to spend time with her GF's - or go out partying. She's working 2 jobs. Doing what she needs to do.

If I were you, I'd use that time to be proactive. Hang with your bud's - go take a class - go hit the gym more. Go spin some plates.

Be proactive - not reactive.

(mid argument online)
me - i love you, goodbye
her - don't even say you love me right now when you barely say it
me - you're too oblivious to realize i do, so what's saying it more going to prove? goodbye
her - what does that even mean "goodbye?"
her - hello?
her - ignoring me now?

This really is so teenager like. Sulking and ignoring her is not the way to go - just make's you look like a boy not a man.

 

[MrMaN]

also, not telling her u want to break up maturely after being with her a year just because most chicks do this is childish, please dont listen to people that tell you to do things like this, of course you'll want to take the high road and be mature about it, thats what a DJ does, your all about charisma, it will not only make you feel like the better person in the end but it WILL MAKE you the better person in the end, you owe that to her that is IF you decide to break up with her whether she thinks she owes it to you or not. can i get a backup anyone?

 

[Vulpine]

Instead of seeing her second job as a problem, see the opportunity in it.

Here's your opportunity to get a second job, still hold down a chick, and rack up some bank. Exploit the opportunity!

 

[Hooligan Harry]

If I could make one suggestion

Cut the crap online. Cut the calls during business hours to a minimum. All it does is affect your own productivity and give you even less to talk about when you do see each other.

I dunno. This whole facebook/msn thing is a problem in my eyes