Waiting to Call

[jakethasnake]

Here's an interesting article from MSN.com concerning calling the gal:

http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=317&TrackingID=516165&BannerID=541888


I normally don't link up "advice" coming from these stupid, generic sites, but I thought the story told here illustrates the dilemma in a nice clear way.


Moral of the story: just do what feels right for you. Don't call the next day (unless you're 100% SURE she has sky-high interest), but do not wait any more than 72 hours, save some extra-ordinary circumstances. If you're trying to raise a girl's low-interest level by not calling for ages, it ain't gonna work. She's gonna forget about you, and even if she does remember you, she'll more than likely write you off. That's how it goes.

 

[DJZ]

Cool, I had a question about this. I got this HB's number this weekend, and she made several comments like I bet you're one of those guys who never calls.... She also said several times to call her tomorrow. Well, I didn't call her the next day, and today is actually the 2nd day, and I didn't call her today either. So when should I call her? I am not going to wait 5 days, b/c I think that would be to long for this one. Even after I left the party, she told my buddy to tell me that I better call her!

 

[jakethasnake]

Hmm... call her TOMORROW, without fail. And just briefly say that you were tied up in personal affairs, and couldn't call right away. But DO NOT say "sorry". Just say it matter of factly, and proceed to making jokes to make her feel at ease, then arranging the first date.

 

[cgraz]

Here's my rule of thumb. For the most part, the minimum wait is 2 days.

If her Interest Level wasn't too high, I'll call within 2-3 days. If her Interest Level was really high, I'll wait anywhere from 4-7 days.

In your particular situation, use some c/f. She'll probably get on you for not having called her the next day, so be c/f about it. Don't "explain yourself", if anything, you were busy and just came across her number and spontaneously called.

Cgraz

 

[jakethasnake]

Oh yeah.. I've always been curious. What time during the day do you guys like to call up these girls, personally? At night (after work)? During the day? Morning? At 11 AM, when they're at work? At 3 AM? 7 PM?


I personally think it's best to call after work, but I'm curious to know what other DJs think.

(This is just for kinda-entertainment purposes - if a girl is very interested in you, she won't care even if you call her at 2 AM )

 

[DJZ]

Hmm... call her TOMORROW, without fail. And just briefly say that you were tied up in personal affairs, and couldn't call right away. But DO NOT say "sorry". Just say it matter of factly, and proceed to making jokes to make her feel at ease, then arranging the first date.

In your particular situation, use some c/f. She'll probably get on you for not having called her the next day, so be c/f about it. Don't "explain yourself", if anything, you were busy and just came across her number and spontaneously called.

Ahhhh both good advice! Thanks guys. You know...it's funny, I asked my roomate the same question, and he replied almost the same as you guys did, but with a little twist. He said to keep the convo short, 3-4 minutes, tell her you're busy, but you wanted to say hello b/c you came across her number, then give her my number and tell her to call me later on. When/if she calls me back later, make a date. If she doesn't call back, wait a few days and call her back.

I think this works, b/c I tried this on a girl at school last semester. She gave me a ride to my car, and was hinting around about a music festival we were having that weekend. I had a g/f at the time, so I played dumb to her remarks. I gave her my number and told her if she wanted to study, to call me. She never called. Later that semester I saw her in the hall and started talking to her. I asked her why she never called, and her reply was "I don't call boys." Of course I came back with a cheesy..."well I'm not a boy, I'm a man." We talked for a minute more, and departed. The next day she called me 3 times! lol She called my cell one time, my house one time, and later that night called my cell again! I waited a few days and returned her call. I pretended like I only knew she called once, b/c she only left one message. She pretended like she only called once too...LOL Suffice it to say we ended up meeting in a park to study, but ended up talking the whole time. She bragged about herself the whole time, while I didn't say much about myself. Later she invited me to go eat with her. After that, I told her I had to go, and told her I would see her around. Again, I had a g/f, so I couldn't get involved with her more.

Fast forward 5 months later. I haven't seen her b/c we both transfered to diff schools. I called her up outta the blue and got her voicemail, left her a funny message (I can do a lot of different cartoon/celebrity voices), and then told her to call me. She called me back within 10 minutes. Now she is calling me about once a week, asking me to come spend the night with her at the college she is attending. Ahhhh I feel like a DJ, but I'm so far from it. I can't wait to feel what it's like to achieve DJ status.

 

[Walden]

Screw that 3 days **** , 1 day and 1 day only!

It's like chick thermodynamics , they grow cold they don't warm up!

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

I've personally found that calling them late at night usually after 9 p.m. on a weekday is the best time to get a hold of them. I don't call unless i plan on asking them out during the convo.

I don't think there should be a set in stone rule of when to call. I've called girls the next day or up to 5 days later depending on how busy I was.

 

[chlywly]

I'll usually call in 1-2 days, if there is no interest then I just don't call 1-2 days is just enough to get them thinking about whether you're going to call or not.. Besides when to call and all those other silly little rules actually make little difference when it comes to IL...

If you're not an interesting individual then no matter how many of these little games you play to try and hold up a womans IL in you, sooner or later you will get tired of the games and she will lose the IL

Just work on yourself as an individual, perfect your craft, make your like something which you are proud of, and worry about nothing

 

[DJZ]

update. I called the chick a minute ago. She answered the phone, I think she was taking a nap. I told her who I was and she said she remembered me. I asked her if she was busy and she said that she had a break between class, she was taking a nap, but she wasn't asleep yet, and it was no big deal, "im just watching TV." I took that as her saying, yeah, I was going to take a nap, but I'd like to chat with you. I dunno if I perceived that correctly or not, but anyway. I told her I was about to head out anyway, but that I was calling b/c I told her I would call (I think I effed up here) and that I would call her later or something. Then I said "have you got my number?" and she said she had it now. After that I told her I would talk to her later on.

Convo may have lasted 3 minutes tops.

Overall I think it went well, she sounded a little disappointed that I cut it short, but I'm not sure how she took the "I'm calling you b/c I told you I would call," comment. I may call her tonight, since I told her I would call her later. What do you guys think?

 

[jakethasnake]

I think you just had a case of the nerves. Newb mistake. Don't beat yourself up over it too much, just call her again, and just ask her out, straight up. Stop being so nervous! No big deal.

 

[DJZ]

yeah, probably right. I called her back last night and got her voicemail. Left her a message and she called me back within 10 minutes. I missed her call and she left me a message saying she was sorry that she missed my call, she had her ringer turned off (she was studying). I tried to call her back today, but she didn't answer, and I hung up before her voicemail came on.

Dammit, haha, I should have answered last night. Ohh well, hopefull this will be a good test - see if she returns my call without me leaving a voicemail.

If she doesn't call back just based on my number being on her missed call list, how long should I wait before trying again?

 

[jakethasnake]

DJZ, any progress on this?

 

[learningtopimp]

I once waited for 3 weeks, was an HB 7, turns out she remembered me exactly and talks to me real nicely for like 2 mins, they goes off on how she hates players and people who "abuse" her and then hangs up after calling me a jackass and a hopeless loser. Her loss.

 

[jakethasnake]

Hehe.... I got a number from a woman a long time ago, and I just completely forgot about it for over 2 months. For kicks I'm going to test the absolute LIMITS of waiting, and call her. Whether or not it is a failure or not remains to be seen.