VERY HELPFUL tips for those with APPROACH ANXIETY

[natralguy]

just keep an open mind an learn from anyone and everyone while keeping your focus on your goal
recently something embarassing happend to me with a girl it really blew my ego.....so what, this only made me focus even stronger on my goal to become good with girls

 

[YourStallion]

I think people are missing the point that mr. elor and myself are trying to make.

1. He's not in control of his emotions. He gets very upset, when someone calls him out.
2. He needs to derive some validation from the people here for some sort of self-esteem high.
3. He feels like it's necessary to defend himself to no bodies that he obviously labels as trolls. Anyone with the confidence in themselves and in the messages they present, wouldn't need to.
4. You can just tell by the way he writes his stuff that it's not coming from experience.

The 4th part is what stuck out. It's pretty easy to pick out. Than the first three come out and only support it.

 

[YourStallion]

Now this isn't personal against Skip, my problem from this is because people who think they're experts pass on bad advice.

Definately. Skip (and everyone else) needs to realize our comments aren't at skip, but to the type of people like skip.

I also hate it when anyone says, "This is what you got to do" or "These are the rules you must follow". There are no rules.

 

[YourStallion]

I reckon (and remember this is my own personal view and not fact), that it's better to have a mindset to deal with whatever life throws at you, rather than rigidly stick to rules.

I completely agree. This is all subjective, so take it how you want. That to be successful with women is to be successful with life. It's to be a confident, in control, driven from the inside out person.

I think there is a lot of good things here for people to really help themselves and improve, but the message gets perverted(No not in a sexual way). The message is destroyed. The emphasis on things are on the wrong things.

Everything else like C+F will fall under these general ideas. I'm not gonna knock some techniques completely, in fact C+F has done me well, but I'd like to think of them as crutches rather than being the be-all and end-all.

I have an interest opinion on C+F. This comes into what I said about perverted messages. We all know that the most attractive quality a man can have is confidence. I feel that C+F is only a compensation for confidence. The whole "****y" makes you come off as someone that is confident. You're not afraid to "go there". And well, the funny is funny. It's always fun to be around someone that is funny. But I don't think it addresses the real issue, that these people are not confident.
As well, the ****y and funny also plays on the insecurities of the girls you're trying to "game". All it does is gets the girl focused on her own insecurities, rather than seeing your own. Eventually, she'll see through it, and see that you're not confident, insecure, and needy.

 

[Serialized3]

I have a better tip for quashing approach anxiety.

Suck it up, and realize that there's nothing that can happen to you, aside from some little ho being indifferent to you. If you can't handle that, you don't deserve to breathe my air.

 

[Zerix]

Thanks for this advice Skip, helps me if not anyone else :yes: I knew about #1 and I definately feel sooo much confident in good clothing and when I look best. I never really considered number 2, I gotta keep that in mind. And number 6 I've been wanting to try, I gotta ask this girl to go with me next time then, she's good looking, best friend. Gettin drunk just for the approaches I wouldn't really consider unless I'm at a party of course. I don't approach so often, which I really got to change about myself, I'm always disconfident but I need to stop caring so much.

 

[YourStallion]

I have a better idea for quashing approach anxiety.

Suck it up, and realize that there's nothing that can happen to you, aside from some little ho being indifferent to you. If you can't handle that, you don't deserve to breathe my air.

See this is what I mean. This advice doesn't address the main issue. The issue here is that people define their self worth by external forces, such as the girls response. If she's happy to see you, you feel good. If she tells you to **** off, you feel bad.
These people need to learn to love themselves, learn to be proud of their qualities and skills and derive their self worth from inside out.

Well I quite like C+F because I'm a sarcy get anyway and it suits me well, so it's not like I'm having to put it on. It definitely fits in with self-respect though, because the general idea is that it shows a woman that you're not intimidated by her, which fits in with self-respect.

I agree self-respect is important, but C+F is offered as a solution, without really addressing self-respect. Know what I mean?

 

[Serialized3]

All you gotta do is, suck it up and approach.

Approach, approach, approach, approach.

Most guys don't have the balls to get momentum started. All I can say is that just don't take things personally and detach yourself from your little EGO you're working so hard to protect.

Sure, you'll get shot down, but the more it happens, you'll find that the less it affects you. And most women aren't even *****es about it, either. Most are polite and tell you "no, i have a boyfriend" or something to get you to leave them alone. I've approached hundreds of girls, and the worst thing was that some girl called me ugly. I sort of laughed it off and was glad I found out she was a ***** before I even started wasting my time on her.

All you marys just gotta get out there and approach and repeat repeat repeat. You won't get any experience posting here. You gotta go out into real life and do it.

 

[YourStallion]

You must know of another site that deals with success in all areas of your life. I can't stand most of the people here.

 

[YourStallion]

I guess I just don't agree with the direction of the board. It 's more about women. Know what I mean? I guess it fits in with me. I want to be successful with my life, not just with women. I want to be successful with my financially, physically, emotionally, with relating (to anyone). That kind of stuff.

Take WSA for example. It fits more in with me because it addresses success in a lot of aspects of my life, where I want to be successful. Now I like WSA, but it's not active enough for me.

 

[YourStallion]

Well these boards are mainly about attracting women, in fact that's what gets a lot of the people here.

When I first found this place (Like a year ago) I would of said that was the reason, but after some soul searching and deep thought, I figured out it was another issue I had, that filtered into my life with women and every other part of my life.

I imagine a lot of people here who have a problem with women, like oneitus for example, probably have an underlying issue that effects all parts of their lives.

 

[skip2mylou781]

bumppp

 

[skip2mylou781]

1 more tip - being drunk mite actually help overcome that fear as well

 

[skip2mylou781]

bump

 

[skip781]

bump - more quality thread by the guy who keeps getting banned for no reason