Very Discouraged-cant Seem To Find Quality Women

[Phyzzle]

Who is going to have more relationships with young, beautiful, childless, energetic, ambitious, non-bitter, high quality women?

Is it:

A)A researcher who discovers a new treatment for leukemia, starts his own company, and eventually ammasses twenty mil?

or

B)A pub owner in a college town.

I think we all know the answer to that one. It's obviously B. Gettin what you want, woman-wise, means being reasonably successful AND having the biggest social circle possible, with the most social proof.

Doc Love is right, you need to get involved with as many groups as possible, religious, outdoors, whatever. I've always found it more productive than working on the cold approach.

You think you have it hard? I'm in Engineering. Stop depending on people you meet through work for your social life.

 

[Drum&Bass]

I don't have any desire to marry (at this point in my life)...

I've been with women who had little sexual experience and wanted me to teach them to be good and I've been with women who have had lots of experience.

I enjoyed my time more with women who knew how to fcuk nasty !

She is a wild party girl. Has had threesomes, Loves to give head, and is loud between the sheets. She is a real party girl. She loves to drink, gets high here and there and has been known to snort a line or two. Everyone says she is a nympho. She has has been cheated on in the past by men. Was raped once, and has a few emotional issues because of it.

doesn't sound to bad too me, I especially love the fact that she likes giving head !

Just because you marry a virgin does not mean she will not have a high sex drive idiot.

If you have more experience with woman you would know this Dumb AZZ.

If you can still find any virgins that will fall head over heels in love with you and not feel like they are missing out on anything after having sex with you and only you, THEN MORE POWER TO YA !!

PS. Don't flame other posters for no reason idiot.

no need to get all sensitive..we just have a different view on reality and whats important in a woman !!

xtra:

Dumb fvck easily let me give you an example. Lookyoung marries a girl that is virgin. Lookyoung pops the cherry. Lookyoung fvcks her good and she loves having sex with Lookyoung. She looks forward to lookyoung coming homing and getting fvcked by him. Lookyoung and her fvck 3 times a day 7 days a week. When she is on her period she will give lookyoung a BJ to keep him happy.

Lookyoung classics !!

Yes, I am 30 years old dumb azz. If I wasn't than why would I say I was idiot.

Mo' Lookyoung classics !!


Fo Phyzzle

Sorry Phyzzle your example describes a gold digger who wants something to brag about..not a young, beautiful, childless, energetic, ambitious, non-bitter,

high quality woman

Gettin what you want, woman-wise, means being reasonably successful AND having the biggest social circle possible, with the most social proof.

the biggest social circle and social proof ?? for getting the woman you want ?? ...SELL OUT !!!

Doc Love is right, you need to get involved with as many groups as possible, religious, outdoors, whatever. I've always found it more productive than working on the cold approach.

I agree

 

[Phyzzle]

Sorry Phyzzle your example describes a gold digger

Whoah, wait a minute, I just edited for clarity, sorry. Check out the bold.

 

[afrojiggles]

seems like you were automaton without digesting the patterns and principles here that when you crash you did crash HARD, so now re-learn your steps where you went wrong rather than be bitter with all women as i believe there are some reasonable gals there worth you.

 

[violator]

I'll tell you right from the beginning, I don't know a lot about women. I still have trouble approaching them (I don't hear people admit that very often on this forum). I couldn't hope to give you advice, but I can speak from personal experience.



This quote raised a red flag in my mind, as it reminds me of me. I don't have rich parents, but they make a pretty decent chunk of change. We are decidedly upper middle class. I had a lot of poor, black friends in high school (I'm white). I felt embarrassed about 100% of the time. I mean, I just felt so rich, as if I should just pull out 20 dollar bills and just give them to them. My money wasn't making me happy, and I felt like they could use it so much more than me.

This is true and a noble sentiment. But what bugs me is my general ascetic attitude toward life. I buy cheap, ratty clothing, even though I could afford way better. I would be far more embarrassed driving a Porsche than a beat up Civic. Something about *not* standing out, seeming like a normal every day guy out suits me, for better or for worse. I don't own a car, and never want to. I want to bike or take public transportation for the rest of my life. My kids, if I have them, can walk.

I am just about the last person in America to not own a cell phone.

All this pleases me beyond words or measure. The downside is that in my case, I don't know about yours, I have some real problems feeling like I deserve good possessions, good women, good food. I always thought this idea of "deserving something or not" is just hocus pocus. Like if some guy in Mozambique truly felt he deserved a million dollars, he would still be dirt poor.

What began to fascinate me is watching for how often I shoot myself in the foot with women. I do sabotage myself. In fact, some girl kept bringing up sex with me last night... I thought she was attractive, not to mention brilliant... but I don't know, I kept choosing that exact time to say stuff like, "my first kiss I sucked on her lip like an industrial strength-vacuum cleaner." lol, ok, I'm not exactly charming the ladies with my suave personality.

As for "there not being quality women around", I haven't been to Miami since I was 10, so I couldn't say. I have felt the same way: that most women are idiots, immoral, etc. But in my life, I felt this way because I was judging them - and myself - extremely harshly. I felt I was better than people, which I was and am not. Everyone does their best, and that is equality enough for me. I just wasn't even looking or trying to look for good qualities in people. I believe every one of us is a miracle, I just happen to fit with some miracles better than others. But that doesn't mean the people I don't click with are bad people.

I'm not saying that you feel this way. I am just speaking from my own personal experience.

I'm very glad I have reduced how much I judge others, and focus on living my own life the way I like to live it.

I believe in peace, love, kindness, respect, understanding, and honesty. I find that life is not so complicated. The only secret for me is learning how to express how I feel in an interesting and powerful way. I'm still learning, because it is an art.

I abhor how complex and frustrating my life was when I was juggling masks. I tell everyone I can - even my parents - about my desire for sex, for approaching women. What I'm working on now is being able to tell women I just meet about how I read books on seduction.

This is completely off-topic

I was in Carson Pirie Scott today shopping for non-rag clothes for work, and I was astonished to hear a guy explaining Mystery's peacock theory to a throng of co-workers. "So the idea" he explained, "is to go into a club wearing something out of the ordinary, and slightly corny. That way women have something to ask you about. I have a friend who does this inadvertently by wearing an enormous cowboy hat...."

I'm sure what he says works for him, or else he wouldn't say it. I say 'no thanks' to that idea man. In fact, I prefer to dress worse than everybody else, look completely anonymous. My style matches your style on that one.

I figure, I don't want a girl to like me for my clothes, my looks, my face, my body (that last one is pretty unlikely though but maybe I just have a bad body image ). I want a girl to like me DESPITE my clothes, my body. I haven't tried stinking on purpose, but that would be funny. I've always wanted to go to a bar with an eye-patch like Juggler.

I want a girl to love who I am so much that she will date me even if I live in a shack. Not that I want to live in a shack, although come to think of it, that would be kind of like camping.

Anyway, I'm not saying you don't do any of these things. You're probably more talented with women than I am anyway. The one thing you don't have over me is access to my unique personal experience and knowledge. Yay, everybody has some that!

The biggest advantage I think I have over most people is that I know myself better than almost anybody you will ever meet.

I made a list of everybody I know so I wouldn't forget any traumatic experiences.
I made a list of traumatic experiences and healed most of them.
I can name and heal most of my traumatic memories. I have become good (I think) at healing psychological scars, and preventing new ones from forming. So I feel really happy about my progress there.

Maybe I just think I know myself, but don't really. It's always possible

I like your style bro, keep up rocking the universe.

Fo'shizza

(not related to Eddie Izzard (the only other Izza I've ever heard of. You know how I got this sn? I just made typed random characters on a keyboard one time five years ago, because I was downloading porn off *****, and didn't want to use one of my normal screennames. Since then I have always smiled when I meet Izzo's and Izze. You know another word that has 'Izza" in it? I just thought of this. I'll give you a hint, you guys can call me "Eats-uh" from now on ))

600 posts w00t, I'm out.

Yes, IZZA, I get your point of feeling guilty when you see so many people less fortunate then your self. The point of not wanting to stand out also struck a nerve cause that also describes me. I have this innate fear of appearing different than others for better or worse. I grew up in a lower to middle class environment where both my parents struggled to make ends meet. I have watched my mother really sacrifice herself to help get through college and law school. My father passed away long ago so things were that much more difficult for her. I went through a series of traumatic events in my life that really grounded me. As the result I became really spiritual and closer to God and developed a different perspective on things as I grew older.

Your buying "cheap cloths" made me laugh because that also describes me. I go to a local clothing store tha sells discounted clothing where you can buy alot of genuine brand clothing for up to half the regular price. My mother was somewhat thrifty, so I guess I took after her.

I did see a beautiful green 1998 BMW 750IL V-12 for sell in wonderful condition that I like for a really good price. I am a car nut and always like going to car shows but I would probably never buy a new car because of the horrible depreciation. Why spend $100,000.00 on a new car when you can spend about $20,000.00 for a 1998 Bimmer that once cost $100K 10 years ago and drives just as nice if not better than a new one? Other than because I have an affinity towards high powered german cars, the 750IL is like a tank so you feel very safe in it as opposed to my little scion. Took a test drive and the thing is a rocket on four wheels and incredibly smooth. I think I am going to buy her!

 

[violator]

If were you, i'd buy a ferrari and bang a new chick every night.
I saw some guy driving in one, and all the women were looking at him from their cars.

They're all prostitutes... at least American women. They want to marry rich and think they deserve everything... psychotics.
The funniest thing is their butt-ugly compared to any European girl. Inside and outside.
I've lived in America and other countries abroad, and i find American women disgusting.

So that's my advice, just bang em all, have fun.
You know you can't have a normal relationship with them anyway, they're too materialistic, self centered and just plain dumb.

(Sorry i'm not over 25, but i enjoy reading a lot of your posts here because you guys have a lot of experience.)

I agree with you on Euro girls being prettier. It really depends where in Europe. I heard German and English women are the ugliest, while the Eastern European/Scandinavian are the prettiest. I lived in Spain, I have seen and been with some real beauties. Regardless of physical appearnance, once you are abroad, you will get the sense just how unspolied foreign women are compared to American women.

 

[grinder]

Another problem is I am kind of shy in approaching women, especially the hot ones, and most of the women I have gone out with were the ones to make the first moves. But that does not happen very often so I know that I am going to have to start getting more aggressive and start approaching which seems awkward for me.

This is the most common fear expressed on this board. It is the most important to address.

Thinking and analyzing will not solve it.

Only doing.

There are about 2000 threads on how to do this. Check ‘em out.

 

[docv]

You don't know the level I am at. You don't even know me.

Yes, I am 30 years old dumb azz. If I wasn't than why would I say I was idiot.


Dumb fvck easily let me give you an example. Lookyoung marries a girl that is virgin. Lookyoung pops the cherry. Lookyoung fvcks her good and she loves having sex with Lookyoung. She looks forward to lookyoung coming homing and getting fvcked by him. Lookyoung and her fvck 3 times a day 7 days a week. When she is on her period she will give lookyoung a BJ to keep him happy.

Dumb Bass marries a girl that has fvcked 45 guys. She is a wild party girl. Has had threesomes, Loves to give head, and is loud between the sheets. She is a real party girl. She loves to drink, gets high here and there and has been known to snort a line or two. Everyone says she is a nympho. She has has been cheated on in the past by men. Was raped once, and has a few emotional issues because of it.

Dumbbass marries her. SHe has sex with him 3 times a week. After 1 month of marriage she says I am not feeling good about myself and gets on antideppressants. She loses her sex drive and than Dumbass is wacking off every night. He has sex 5 times a year if that. He is too AFC to do anything about it and he stays with her and dies a miserable man.

No dumbass your the one without a clue. Just because you marry a virgin does not mean she will not have a high sex drive idiot.

If you have more experience with woman you would know this Dumb AZZ.

PS. Don't flame other posters for no reason idiot.

the examples above are exactly the way i have seen and experienced 'it' as being. american culture is going to $hit. i dont want to marry some broad who is 25 or up.. i want to meet a good 18 yr old. marry her within 3 or 4 yrs. have her be the real deal and not some party hoe. rock on lookyoung..

 

[squirrels]

You know what I'd do if I had the kind of money you have?

Move to California and become a volunteer firefighter or something. Just live off the interest and the proceeds from my property and go do fun stuff in the community.

I hear you...it's tough to find these "quality women"...a lot of the really attractive ones learned early on that "looks are all that matters" so they never developed personalities...and the ones that were told "looks aren't everything" were probably ugly.

Finding honest, cool young women is hard. I've found a few...unfortunately I have either not been confident enough MYSELF to stick with them or the timing was off...they wanted a steady relationship when I wasn't ready, or I wanted one when THEY weren't ready, or some other such nonsense.

It's tough, man. I'd just keep your mind on what you want and pursue the things you're passionate about...and women will appear out of nowhere.

But you also mentioned that most of the women you encounter approach you. I'm in the same boat...and I'm starting to think that it's the major stopping-block here. I don't think the "good ones" will do the approaching. You have to take the initiative.

 

[blueguy]

I think Phyzzle is right on here. You've got all the money but no social proof. Your car and apartment aren't even adding social proof. Now, I'm not saying you should get a nice car and apartment to add social proof to help get women. That's stupid. Not to mention money is a weaker form of social proof than some others (in my opinion). And you would be slowly giving away your freedom by doing so = AFC (frustrated). Over time, you would regret it.

I would say get involved as has been mentioned. Become very good at something that you enjoy and think you would also meet a potential girlfriend. Girls see you as the average guy. Why? Because they cannot see your real estate deals. They cannot see your accomplishments. I would again not suggest to buy things just for the intent to show your status (unless you want those things for yourself). I would however suggest to do something - anything - that you may enjoy and become good at it - dancing, running, guitar, basketball, mountain biking, socializing, etc. You need this anyway. It sounds like your one dimensional life needs a little expansion.

Also, and I think you know this, your biggest problem is not making a move. What's the problem? Just make a move. Make it within the first few minutes of meeting a girl you like. I don't know how you can even date if you're not making moves. It's not that big a deal.

 

[Drum&Bass]

Have you ever met someone whose personality was so charming, whose presence was so alluring, whose contact was so healing that you just love to be around that guy. You want to hang out with him all the time. He just has a great vibe.

are you a woman ??

I don't think I'd want a woman to see me for my real estate deals?! Or for my accomplishments. I don't want a woman to give a flying rat dropping about my status. And why should adding a hobby make the slightest difference?

I have lots of hobbies that I learned to impress women.

But what I realized, and this may apply only to my life, is that they are just replacements for being a boring person. I feel boring. So I seek money, I seek hobbies, I seek status.

Your realization is incorrect. Experience, motivation, accomplishments, desire to live, learn and hobbies make for an interesting person..they are what separates YOU from a charming CRACK HEAD who doesn't care about their future.

Once I master social interactions to the point where people think I'm fantastic less than five minutes after a cold approach, what would I need any of this crap for? I could be dirt poor living out of a cardboard box, with no hobbies or prospects, and I'd still do fine.

Hilarity or also known as...nice fantasy world

Happiness for me is doing what I feel like, so why not start right now?

best part of your post
unfortunately you're happiness is about impressing people based on perception without substance.

 

[izza]

Drumbass,

are you a woman ??

Are you?

Offers bubble gum.

Your realization is incorrect.

No, yours is incorrect.

Eats caramel candy.

Experience, motivation, accomplishments, desire to live, learn and hobbies make for an interesting person..they are what separates YOU from a charming CRACK HEAD who doesn't care about their future.

Let's see, I agree that experience, desires, desire to live, and learn, and passions make for an interesting person. I agree with you there.

I know lots of interesting PUAs who seem to have no accomplishments or even motivation to do anything besides pick up women.

What makes people interesting to me is their humanity - their uniqueness, their emotions, their preferences. Everyone has that. Then again, I'm not a chick with breasts and I don't pretend to be one. So maybe all chicks are gold-diggers. I don't feel like discussing hypothetical crackheads because I ain't one.

Although, I think I'm going to go out some night dressed like a hobo and try to pick up chicks. That way, if I succeed, I must have one amazing personality.

Right? Right.

That would be awesome.

Hilarity or also known as...nice fantasy world

best part of your post
unfortunately you're happiness is about impressing people based on perception without substance.

Your world is a fantasy world.

Accomplishments, motivation without humanity - I see a person like that as a shell of facts without a human core. But a person who loves life, and has passion and expresses that passion - we both agree that this is an attractive person. We agree on that.

Yeah, I used to think "social proof" and accomplishments, and ambitions were necessary to get women. It's not like getting women proved me wrong, I still don't have any lol.

I did realize that I felt like a boring person. I have a friend like this. He drives me crazy because he wants to DO something all the time. He can't just sit around and talk. I used to feel like that. I felt boring that's why.

Second, following from the first, I felt inadequate. I used to feel like I needed to find some great ambitions to impress the ladies. Or that I needed dreams and then needed to talk about my dreams. I realized that I didn't really have any big dreams. But so long as I am happy now, I don't feel a big dream for the future really matters. Not yet, that waits until I'm 30.

But I truly believe and trust that I have all I need to attract women, I just need to get over my shame of liking women. If I express myself, and that I like sex, I trust women to respond in kind.

Your interaction with life may be different, but I'm sure you are successful too.

Kindest regards,

Izza

 

[squirrels]

Violator,

First off, ignore all the dumb f*cks on this forum who want to criticize you for being wealthy. I admire people who go out and make money for themselves...you're doing all right in that regard. Don't feel like you have to give it all to charity and go live a bum's life to feel "blessed"...and don't mind all the haters who tend to associate wealth with superficiality and emptiness...you know better than them.

But I DID notice something in your original post...you said the people who are falling for you are CLIENTS of yours. And it goes back to what a lot of the haters were saying...you seem very passionate about your business and your income. So it seems that you're ATTRACTING women in those spheres. Maybe women in your career field aren't what you're looking for in a mate, though.

What else are you passionate about? I have a lot of "guy-hobbies" that I feel very strongly about, so I don't meet a lot of women in those spheres. Is there anything you like doing or would like to try doing that would put you in a more open social sphere?

I think the problem with a lot of people who go to bars and clubs (myself included) is that they go out but fail to engage anyone out there...they expect society to find them. People are too wrapped up in themselves to give you a chance...you have to invest your OWN energy to open them up first.

But are there other places where you may be able to connect with some women?

 

[Wyldfire]

That is a very perceptive response. And you are correct to a certain extent.
I do donate a fair amount to charity. My goal is to retire early, travel the world and give. Yes, it sounds idealistic, but the fact of the matter is I do not need the trappings of a luxurious lifestyle with the cars, the penthouses, the yachts to make me happy. I am quite comfortable in who I am and would feel very out of place if I suddenly became some flashy dude with the gold chains and rings thinking he owns the world. if you saw me you would think I am just some ordinary guy who works 9-5 and that is fine with me Just the other day, I saw some guy in a wheel chair begging for money and I gave him all the cash I had, something like $50.00. My reward was the gleam in his eye and him blessing me. That made my day. I see what you are saying. I should reward myself. But I just don't find happiness in material things. I tried it and it did not impress me enough. I know many people who have the cars, the yachts, the mansions and they are not happy. Just me give a simple life, a simple home and enough to live on for the rest of my life so that I can have the time to enjoy the most important things in life like my 7 year old son. Whatever I do not need, I will gladly give away to thos who need it the most.

You actually are much better off not getting caught up with the materialism. Too many people do that and end up buried in debt. You don't need a bigger place just to fill up with a bunch of things you don't need and won't use. And if your car works then why buy a new one? None of those things provide happiness.

There are quality women out there, but they usually are not out actively looking for men. That's why you're not seeing them. Your best bet is to do some volunteer work in your community. Charity work is a magnet for women of substance. If you get involved with your community in that way you will meet a lot of genuinely good people and even more quality people through them. It's even better than church to find good women because women involved with charity work won't be as likely to have hang ups as church women will.

 

[Throttle]

I think the problem with a lot of people who go to bars and clubs (myself included) is that they go out but fail to engage anyone out there...they expect society to find them. People are too wrapped up in themselves to give you a chance...you have to invest your OWN energy to open them up first.

the trouble is that unless you're the second coming of Cary Grant (the character, not the actor) you need lots of practice AND a quality wing to get anywhere at a bar.

There are quality women out there, but they usually are not out actively looking for men. That's why you're not seeing them. Your best bet is to do some volunteer work in your community. Charity work is a magnet for women of substance. If you get involved with your community in that way you will meet a lot of genuinely good people and even more quality people through them. It's even better than church to find good women because women involved with charity work won't be as likely to have hang ups as church women will.

best to seek out both venues & more if your interest is there. the biggest problem with meeting women in these venues -- esp. a church -- is that they tend to replicate all the problems you face in a small town (see Vulpine's very entertaining account of manning up to that situation) plus, depending on what sort of charity or church, you may find an extra heavy dose of judgementalism if you engage in gossip-worthy behavior.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

The Myth of the "Quality" Woman

It seems like all I read about on SoSuave these days is a never ending quest for a "Quality Woman." There's threads asking for clear definitions of what constitutes a "Quality" woman and others that conveniently set women up into 2 camps - Quality women and Horz, as if there were no middle ground. How easy it becomes to qualify a woman based on her indiscrretions (as heinous as they're perceived to be) for either of these catagories. This is binary thinking at its best - on or off, black or white, Quality woman or Hor.

I think the term 'Quality' woman is a misnomer. Guys tend to apply this term at their leisure not so much to define what they'd like in a woman (which is actually an idealization), but rather to exclude women with whom they'd really had no chance with in the first place, or mistakenly applied too much effort and too much focus on only to be rebuffed. This isn't to say that there aren't women who will behave maliciously or indiscriminately, nor am I implying that they ought to be excused out of hand for such. What I am saying is that it's very AFC to hold women up to preconceived idealizations and conveniently discount them as being less than "Quality" when you're unable to predict, much less control their behaviors.

The dangers inherent in this convention is that the AFC (or the DJ subscribing to the convention) then self-limits himself to only what he perceives as a Quality woman, based on a sour-grapes conditioning. Ergo, they'll end up with a "Quality" woman by default because she's the only candidate who would accept him for her intimacy. It becomes a self-fulfiling prophecy by process of elmination. Taken to its logical conclusion, they shoot the arrow, paint the target around it and call it a bullseye, and after which they'll feel good for having held to a (misguided) conviction.

So why is this a social convention then? Because it is socially unassailable. Since this convention is rooted to a binary premise, no one would likely challenge it. It would be foolish for me to say "Yes Mr. DJ I think you ought to avoid what you think of as Quality women." Not only this, but we all get a certain satisfaction from the affirmation that comes from other men confirming our assessment of what catagory a woman should fit into. Thus it becomes socially reinforced.

Be careful of making a Quality woman your substitute for a ONEitis idealization.

 

[speed dawg]

The Myth of the "Quality" Woman

........

Be careful of making a Quality woman your substitute for a ONEitis idealization.

This post always hits the spot

 

[Sinistar]

violator,

I *perceived* from what I read that you just aren't truly happy right about now. I also sense some incongruity (I'll address that last). Now back to the unhappy part...

We'll start with the obvious. If you were having a great life, happy and completely comfortable with yourself I believe you never would have posted right?

Now on the outside your post was in regards to "The difficulties of finding a quality woman". Yet we're all locking onto vibe that there's more to this than the age old quest of settling with a decent HB. And I think joekerr locked onto a big part of it.

Maybe it's time for a Red Pill.

Dude, right about now you're totaly engulfed in the datastream of our socio-matrix. It (ie the media, family, coworkers, etc) are *conveying* to you that you'll be happy[er] if you can find a *quality woman* and *settle down*. Then combine that programming along with the fact that you are a logical, overt male. So you set out to logically, directly and overtly make this problem (ie unhappiness) go away by focusing your energy on finding this woman. And guess what, it isn't working is it?

Okay by now that Red Pill has probably kicked in. You're unplugged and seeing things for what they really are. You see very clearly that money, cars, homes and yes ... even women do not equal happiness. You start to *feel* the answer lies somewhere very nearby - actually it's you! This awareness (of how things really work) along with the responsibilities the accompany it might feel different, or strange or even mean from time to time. Yet you know it is right and good for everyone in your life.

And in this state you'll recognize that the desire for a "quality women" or this "LTR/marriage goal state" are both externally programmed and incongruent with being a truly happy ALPHA guy.

Unplug from that sh!t. We've had doctors on this board with the same problems as you. They've got the frosting, but they're missing the cake. The frosting is the big salary, nice house, fancy car, silicon HB, etc. But the cake is you and a healthy value system.

Start being a MAN again. Men invest first into family, careers, friends, hobbies and self-interests regardless of women. Heck, we might even come across selfish and controlling in these pursuits that we value and make us happy. Guess what - that's GOOD! Why? Because we're doing something that keeps our minds and bodies challenged and yeah, because we're selfish and it makes us HAPPY!

My direct advice to you would be to look at the things in the paragraph above. Is your relationship with your family healthy? Is your career still challenging? Do you have good solid friendships with other guys? Do you continue to pursue hobbies and interests that fully get your mind off of everything else? Do those things bring a smile that you can't hide

And the best part, women find this sh!t attractive. Just think, the seemingly boring accountant who spends his free time flying or fishing and playing in volleyball league - because he wants too - is going to pull that *quality woman* you can't seem to find. Why? Because he's happy doing that stuff. He seems to have priorities that put women at #4 or #5 instead of #1. He's confident, busy (ie aloof) and desireable (in their eyes). And whether he's a jacked in AFC or a DJ having fun with the matrix, guess what ... it's proven working equation.

So, look more closely at joekerr's advice. Take some downtime to look inward to find out what would make happy at a level where the rest of life is more of a background noise. Is it really a woman?

And the irony always seems to go along the lines of: You tend to find something beyond your expectations when you've all but stopped looking for it.

Back to that incongruity. The first is probably just something I missed. You mention living in a simple condo but previously mentioned it being worth $3M - did I understand that right? And second, you've implied countless hook ups with HB (both foreign and domestic). I would think with that much dating experience you'd understand that there are better ones and worse ones and the guy who puts himself first while continuing to date seems to be the luckiest (loosely quoted from RT's quote regarding working hard and luck).

 

[STR8UP]

Hearing people talk about quality women vs. wh0res always cracks me up. It reminds me of hearing someone say "she's different" when talking about their latest g/f.

Quality woman exist only in your mind. There is no public consensus. You will label a woman as "quality" as you see fit to justify your situation.

That said, I agree with the idea that the vast majority of women are "undateable". I have the same problem everyone else does on finding women who deserve more than a minute of my time.

Until you find the one who is "different", feel free to indulge in a few who are "the same". That's my new motto.

 

[Vypros]

You ought to try reading "Perfect is Boring" by Pook as a start.

Also, you have to pay attention to where you are meeting these women. If you keep meeting "losers" then it's time you did TWO things:

1. Take an honest assessment of yourself and see if you don't possess certain "loser" qualities (even though your ******d life seems very successful)

2. Change your environment. Start doing DIFFERENT things in your spare time. Join a church or a charity (your BEST locations for meeting more quality women).