Very confused... Looking for advice

Anja

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Okay, straight to the point. Last week I started on my new “summer job” and I met this beautiful woman. We clicked at first talk, and we seem to have great chemistry. I work at the bar, while she’s the receptionist, and she always comes to me for talk... And she also jokes a lot.

Since I work at the bar, one of my tasks is also to take the “welcome snacks” to the rooms, and she always goes with me (even though I don’t need any help). For everyday that passes, the more we talk. I also work shorter than the receptionist as well, and whenever I go home, she always walks with me till the exit door, and stays there talking to me for another 10 min or so.

Two days ago she did the same routine, but this time she asked about what I was gonna do after work. I said I was gonna go biking. There was a lot of blah blah in between, but then she asked me if I have rollerblades. She wanted to borrow them because she didn’t take hers with her. So I went home and brought them to her, and then she said that we should go biking or skating one day. Ofc I said sure. She asked for my number, but she didn’t give me hers... Which I find very weird.

Yesterday we actually got very private in the door in the back, and she asked me if I could go today after work. The sentence she used sounded like this: “I was thinking, if you want and have time, that we go biking to a place tomorrow. It would be nicer to do it later in the evening because there are less people and more privacy”. We made a deal. Today came, and at work we talked 24/7. I think today is actually the day when we talked the most tbh. When she was going home, I asked her, if we had a deal at 8 pm (the time we planned). And she said, she’ll get to me. But guess what, she haven’t.

I don’t know if this could be the reason but I’m gonna say it anyway. When she asked me to come with her, there was just us. But when I asked her today, there were four other work colleagues around us... + Today is REALLY windy, could that be a reason? And I also didn’t mention that we’re both girls lol So what do you guys think?
 

ItsFate451

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You let too much time go by without asking her out. When you first starting talking you should’ve asked out on a date and you would’ve had your answer right there.

She asked for your number which is a good sign.
 

Anja

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You let too much time go by without asking her out. When you first starting talking you should’ve asked out on a date and you would’ve had your answer right there.

She asked for your number which is a good sign.
You think so? I started working like 7 days ago, and she asked me for my number 2 days ago... So 5 days after I started working. She has been like the main initiator of everything between us. But still, why didn’t she text me today...
Do you think I should ask her sth like: what happened yesterday (in a jokeful way ofc)? Or let her explain herself?
 

RedScorpion

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No contact. Spin plates.

Joke. But I wouldn’t worry about it too much. It was her idea to do it, and her accepting to let you know about it. You were up for it, she said she’d let you know, she dropped the ball. Just be normal around her the next time you see her, like it’s not a big deal. If you get into a decent conversation, then you can mention it. Definitely not first thing. I would put the absolute minimum into it, as such you aren’t worried about it, etc.

If you do get briefly talking about it, let her bring up doing it again. Or if she apologizes, you can say no problem, idlely mention ‘we can do it some other time’, without trying to push a specific day. Shows you’re still up for it, but not pushy/needy for that engagement with her. It was her idea - I’m sure she’ll push for it again. If she wants it, she’ll follow up with a specific day. If not, then just back slightly off and remain normal/friendly.
 

Spaz

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Nothing we would say would work for you simply because it's from a man's perspective and u r a female.

Anyhow, I seriously think u r in dire need of a real d1ck, it would solve plenty of ur problems.
 

RangerMIke

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Okay, straight to the point. Last week I started on my new “summer job” and I met this beautiful woman. We clicked at first talk, and we seem to have great chemistry. I work at the bar, while she’s the receptionist, and she always comes to me for talk... And she also jokes a lot.

Since I work at the bar, one of my tasks is also to take the “welcome snacks” to the rooms, and she always goes with me (even though I don’t need any help). For everyday that passes, the more we talk. I also work shorter than the receptionist as well, and whenever I go home, she always walks with me till the exit door, and stays there talking to me for another 10 min or so.

Two days ago she did the same routine, but this time she asked about what I was gonna do after work. I said I was gonna go biking. There was a lot of blah blah in between, but then she asked me if I have rollerblades. She wanted to borrow them because she didn’t take hers with her. So I went home and brought them to her, and then she said that we should go biking or skating one day. Ofc I said sure. She asked for my number, but she didn’t give me hers... Which I find very weird.

Yesterday we actually got very private in the door in the back, and she asked me if I could go today after work. The sentence she used sounded like this: “I was thinking, if you want and have time, that we go biking to a place tomorrow. It would be nicer to do it later in the evening because there are less people and more privacy”. We made a deal. Today came, and at work we talked 24/7. I think today is actually the day when we talked the most tbh. When she was going home, I asked her, if we had a deal at 8 pm (the time we planned). And she said, she’ll get to me. But guess what, she haven’t.

I don’t know if this could be the reason but I’m gonna say it anyway. When she asked me to come with her, there was just us. But when I asked her today, there were four other work colleagues around us... + Today is REALLY windy, could that be a reason? And I also didn’t mention that we’re both girls lol So what do you guys think?
You waited too long to make a date... but that doesn't mean you would have done better had you tried. It could have been that she backed off on day one and you would have missed out of the awesome case of blue balls for the last 7 days.

This is normal chick behavior... this honest to God happens to all of us all the time. It happened to me today. I got a text from a chick I haven't heard from in 6 months then out of no-where, she sends this "Hey! How are you doing... blah blah blah" text. I did what men should always do... I got an indicator of interest and asked her out. Silence... nothing all day. Two weeks ago... this chick that I have been banging, and I thought was going well... made a date... she even said she had a present for me...asked her out, and she flaked on me. Last week I had a great first date with a chick, and had another date set up this week... and she cancelled. Chicks do this all the time. IT HAPPENS TO US ALL. Welcome to the club.

Now what to do about it.... nothing. Just go after chicks that don't do this. Getting mad and emotional about this is like screaming at the sky... angry... that it's raining. It's a force of nature and just happens. Chick being chicks... and the better looking they are... the more this happens. Just surrender to it and have no expectations. If she keeps the date good, if she doesn't that's cool; just do something else.

It doesn't matter why this happens, it just does. Go after other chicks and be patient... the worst thing you can do is burn a bridge by becoming an emotional basket case and calling her out on it.

If she really likes you she will reach out again. But it is always a better policy to make a move, and get too the point quick, not because it works, but because it helps you filter out chicks that are not going to give you what you want so you can move onto others. If you move on... and she likes you, she will make another run at you... then you ask her out again... if she flakes again.. so what, just tell her if she changes her mind she should reach out again... then forget about her until this happens again. Then you can make it harder by making her come to you. At that point she is chasing you... which is where you want to be.
 

MrWood

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she literally begged you to take her out, several times... daily even.

she gave you every opportunity, served on a platter and you did not even look at all the goodies to choose from

she figures you forrage in the garbage, or goes to the store only to buy packaged tv dinners... and not interested in her yummy platter full of goodies
 
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