uninhibited & great sex for men and women

[Glumix]

TL;DR
There are different fuels that individually or in combination can trigger an extraordinarily intense d1ck craving, for a woman.(examples below)

To what degree do you as a man even notice, care, and/or are you impacted by what is fueling a woman's particular d!ck craving?

Do specific ones (or combinations):
-- alter a man's desire or attraction, +/- ?
-- impact the kind of sex he has with her (that time)?
-- impact the intensity of sex ?
--impact his pleasure/overall satisfaction?

Examples (in no particular order)
1. She's into him emotionally
2. She wants to give herself to him, be taken by him, and receive all of him.
3. She's physically attracted to and turned on by his body (before she even she's him naked.)
4. She feels spark, chemistry, vibrancy, aliveness or a sense connection between them.
5. She loves him.
6. It's the middle of her cycle and her hormones have her craving d!ck out of her mind.
7. She feeling sexy, sensual and/or horny.
8. She just wants to fvck and be fvcked, (may or may not even know you, or see you again)
9. ???

Bah... for me, it's a combination of all and everything you cite here.
But it's really personal stuff.

What turns me ON is a girl who is really aware of her sexuality and sensuality. Who knows what kind of moves, looks, make men horny and she knows how to play with that.

I care, notice and it impacts me a LOT. It changes everything.

It has little to do with her body or clothes but more with how she is. You can wear a short skirt and move like a man. It's going to be pathetic. Once again, I've had HOT girls who just had no idea about that. Well, actually, a large majority of women I've had were completely unaware of that.

Then, the intensity, kind of sex and pleasure really comes from the general ambiance at that moment. It can be very sensual OR rough depending on what we put in, salt or sugar.

It's really hard to describe it but every time I try to explain it I go back to talking about femininity and masculinity. For me both are about sexual energy and its transfer and nothing else. You have to feel it to be aware of it. And when the connection lacks them you will also feel it.

But as always, to express true femininity or true masculinity, you have to have strong self-confidence because expressing either of them will put yourself in a state of extreme vulnerability. Men will show their most instinctual desires and commit to them and women will submit to those desires. If you lack self-confidence there will be discrepancies in what you do, show and feel and that will kill the connection.

If a man shows strength and roughness in his speech, moves and being and when you bed him and because he lacks self-confidence he fvcks you in a sweet, all love and cuddle manner, you will be like WTF happened to my caveman?!.

As a man, when you do that, the woman never calls you back and you ask yourself why? And that happens a lot when your game is not internalized and not who you really are.

 

[salinechow]

Ok. I cant believe I am about to do this. Yet, the discomfort I am about to feel somewhat makes it more comfortable. Getting in touch with myself while sharing in front of you all.
I will say this, the highly intellectual and authenticity of some of the individuals on SS this since last year has got me inspired to share.

I read this all about f^cking a girl primaly, cvmming on her face, (never did that intentionally) choke her (very lightly once in a while. I apply pressure but it's never really anything like a choke) F6ck her in the ass, take what you want in bed, toss her around, hit it,hard and fast, say dirty stuff, like, your a little whorre, yada yada, whathave you.

Hell, I even tow the line a bit for that. Saying you should "Take" a girl. Lead her.

Actually, I read about it( girls wanting crazy sh!t) so much now. The internet and porn seems to be liberating people sharing unabashedly, their desires. I also run into enough girls that seem to want to do stuff like that, and, also even an S&M chick or 2.

Yet, it feels, like, its just not me.

I wrestle with this. I truly do. I cant tell if it is my inhibitions or repressions, or if its just not something Im into. I cant seem to get to the bottom of it. I also feel sort of emasculated thinking that this is every girls secret desire, and I'm just not that guy.

It goes even deeper than that. And I am being authentic here, I have a impressively larger than average penis. I say this NOT to brag, but because it feels like a liability!

First, when I want to get freaky, it seems most girls are either uncomfortable, bordering on pain, and I feel I HAVE to ask if they are "OK" because seeing that, takes me out of the moment. Also, I read everywhere that one should NEVER do that. But I feel I have to. I also, in my own right, hate stopping the moment and flow to have ask.

2ndly, I feel like girls come back to me just for this ( size) sometimes. Like they say to there girls friend, hypothetically. "Yeah, he is a decent lay, nice body, you know, but that f^cking c)ck was so huge, I have to go back. Maybe he'll open up a little bit more next time."
I know this sounds so beta, but like I said I want to share authentically. I wish I could just feel more ME when I f^ck.

Things get much, much, better for me, and "her", when Im in a relationship because of these hang ups I have. When I know a girl can take me, and also, she doesn't judge me, for lack of a better term "sweetness", in bed.

Yet, I want that primal f^ck as well sometimes! However, when fantasy starts to become a reality for me, ( the last girl "friend" I was with would have done anything with me sexually. ANYTHING.) I fumble a bit, and p^ss out.
Even your run of the mill anal sex, and KNOWING not only that she was okay with it, but actually wanted it, still didn't have me comfortable enough to "take" it from her, like we are talking about in this thread.
She even called me out on it. "You had baby, but you missed, you tried like 4 times, now, you just cant shove it in there." And she was right, I missed several moments that the time was right, and I fumbled.

Even the S&M girl, wouldn't show me that side of her much, because I am starting to realize, by some others wisdom shared here, that I didn't make her feel safe enough to get freaky, cause I was not.

I just feel so juvenile when it comes to this dirty side of a sexual encounter. Stuck in my head, hung up, not confident enough to do the things I want to, and when I feel them. It can be quite the stumbling block.

Cause I am into some weird sh!t myself, but its not "hard" persay stuff, and not fetish either. Its more quirky. And I don't enjoy sexual encounters as much when I "slay" a girl. Meaning, f^ck her good.( Hard and maybe fast)
I always feel like it was more a performance or an act of porn, than me being present and enjoying it myself.
I am wondering if there is a way I can be authentically myself in sex, without being what you guys are describing. Or, is it repression and I am not even sure what I like cause I am stuck in some blue pill mentality and passing it off as how I like sex.

Notes to help you, help me, if you are so inclined.

Do we really believe that most girls, especially early on, are this sluty, and Im am not satifing that early on in the sexual relationship?

I like slow, passionate, connecting, F^cking. It gets me the hardest and most turned on. Yet, I understand that could even come off weird early on, so I preform, but don't enjoy it as much myself. Should I continue that fake till you make it, mentality, or is it truly more of a man, to just be myself and do what I like, like we always take about.

Dont get me wrong, I am no missionary only dude either. I love to switch around, I think I do a very good job, leading the interaction, yet, I am not really one to push the boundaries of straight penetration and I am pretty quiet. I don't say much and I make very little noise. Should I work on this? As a partener and for myself? Or again, should I stay true to what I like and what feels good to me?

Condoms are the bane of my sexual existence. Think of trying to f^ck a girl with a coat on that's 4 sizes to small.

Speaking of, should I stop feeling self conscience about my size. Cause this is 20 years in the making of comments that make me really start to believe its a curse more than a blessing. I gotta admit, when a girl needs breaks, Im not feeling good or proud. Im feeling....I dunno, taken out of the moment.

How did you guys overcome the inhibitions to choke someone you are f^cking??? I am so caught up on respect, I just couldn't see myself actually doing this. Yet, I also feel that primal need to get off on that kinda dominance. Again, should I expand on that horizon of sexuality, and how?
Or, should I focus more on being my authentic self as a measure of dominance, manliness, and passion. Do we think I am just repressed or am I actually healthey aware of what I like, and that's it?

Is it that I haven't found the right girl sexually, or is it me? ( I believe I have and bombed the opportunity)

Should I completely unplug and try a prostitute maybe to practice? Which seems so weird for me to say because I have no problems getting laid, and girls seem to dig me, but the piles of talk out there about this more dominant, possibly forceful (or course consensual) sex, gives me doubts that I am not actually giving a girl the "10" experience of sex they fantasize about.

The only girls I have ever truly LOVED, to me, the sex was just ok. Best sex I ever had was with a latin girl I dated who was the epitome of BPD and is the only ex I can say I truly ever hated.

I know its a lot. I know its TMI. Yet, again, I feel a groundswell of truth, authenticity, wisdom and comradery in the forum from certain posters lately, that all seem to be chiming in here, so I wanted to reach out, be vulnerable and see if I might find someone to come alongside and help out if possible.
Also, when I scold others for being beta and ridiculous around here, I always want them to know it comes from a peer, and not some guru, without flaw.

So, I offer you all, a true look of vulnerability. In a way, I feel like that's as tough as anything we talk about.

I hope this lands well with everyone. I hope I didn't go overboard. I appreciate your anticipated wisdoms.

Humbly,

Saline

 

[fastlife]

@salinechow

I read this all about f^cking a girl primaly, cvmming on her face, (never did that intentionally) choke her (very lightly once in a while. I apply pressure but it's never really anything like a choke) F6ck her in the ass, take what you want in bed, toss her around, hit it,hard and fast, say dirty stuff, like, your a little whorre, yada yada, whathave you.

Hell, I even tow the line a bit for that. Saying you should "Take" a girl. Lead her.

Actually, I read about it( girls wanting crazy sh!t) so much now. The internet and porn seems to be liberating people sharing unabashedly, their desires. I also run into enough girls that seem to want to do stuff like that, and, also even an S&M chick or 2.

Yet, it feels, like, its just not me.

I wrestle with this. I truly do. I cant tell if it is my inhibitions or repressions, or if its just not something Im into. I cant seem to get to the bottom of it. I also feel sort of emasculated thinking that this is every girls secret desire, and I'm just not that guy.

If you watch porn, stop. Sex, beyond the pleasure principle, is mostly biological. Most of the physical and psychological effects are biologically underwritten. Personally, I get off on ****ing a girl like an object and taking what I want. What does she want? She wants you to enjoy her. Those are your terms.

I used to get off on getting girls off--but I think it's mostly unnecessary, unnatural, robotic. They get off on me getting off on them. Does that make sense? Be honest with yourself. Good sex (from a girl's POV) might be 5 minutes of missionary with a high value male who can't even last long enough to get it to her face.

It goes even deeper than that. And I am being authentic here, I have a impressively larger than average penis. I say this NOT to brag, but because it feels like a liability!

First, when I want to get freaky, it seems most girls are either uncomfortable, bordering on pain, and I feel I HAVE to ask if they are "OK" because seeing that, takes me out of the moment. Also, I read everywhere that one should NEVER do that. But I feel I have to. I also, in my own right, hate stopping the moment and flow to have ask.

They're uncomfortable because you're uncomfortable. Does that make sense? Pleasure and pain, sexually, are closely related; but by acknowledging the pain and feeling guilty about it, you're denying them that pleasure.

Do yourself a favor and forget about you d1ck size. Literally, not important. Yeah, some girls will be physically incompatible; met one girl that was too tight and must've been 3" deep. Not fun. Keep some lube on the night stand and stop worrying about it.

2ndly, I feel like girls come back to me just for this ( size) sometimes. Like they say to there girls friend, hypothetically. "Yeah, he is a decent lay, nice body, you know, but that f^cking c)ck was so huge, I have to go back. Maybe he'll open up a little bit more next time."
I know this sounds so beta, but like I said I want to share authentically. I wish I could just feel more ME when I f^ck.

I can relate. I used to get depressed and felt every girl just wanted me for my looks. Felt like a bucket list item--**** a 10. But, once again, forget that ****. A girl won't love you for who you are, only for what you make her experience emotionally. Every guy is providing something:

• For some women, that's the size of a man's bankroll.
• For some women, that's the car he drives.
• For some women, that's his **** size or his facial aesthetics or whatever.

But even if you have tight game and awesome personality, the girl only appreciates how that game and personality makes her feel. You need to forget all that **** and focus on what you want.

Things get much, much, better for me, and "her", when Im in a relationship because of these hang ups I have. When I know a girl can take me, and also, she doesn't judge me, for lack of a better term "sweetness", in bed.

Yet, I want that primal f^ck as well sometimes! However, when fantasy starts to become a reality for me, ( the last girl "friend" I was with would have done anything with me sexually. ANYTHING.) I fumble a bit, and p^ss out.
Even your run of the mill anal sex, and KNOWING not only that she was okay with it, but actually wanted it, still didn't have me comfortable enough to "take" it from her, like we are talking about in this thread.
She even called me out on it. "You had baby, but you missed, you tried like 4 times, now, you just cant shove it in there." And she was right, I missed several moments that the time was right, and I fumbled.

Mindset & projection. Literally, your discomfort is rubbing off on them.

Cause I am into some weird sh!t myself, but its not "hard" persay stuff, and not fetish either. Its more quirky. And I don't enjoy sexual encounters as much when I "slay" a girl. Meaning, f^ck her good.( Hard and maybe fast)
I always feel like it was more a performance or an act of porn, than me being present and enjoying it myself.
I am wondering if there is a way I can be authentically myself in sex, without being what you guys are describing. Or, is it repression and I am not even sure what I like cause I am stuck in some blue pill mentality and passing it off as how I like sex.

Get out of your head. Stop worrying about her experience. Get in touch with your animal brain.

Do we really believe that most girls, especially early on, are this sluty, and Im am not satifing that early on in the sexual relationship?

I like slow, passionate, connecting, F^cking. It gets me the hardest and most turned on. Yet, I understand that could even come off weird early on, so I preform, but don't enjoy it as much myself. Should I continue that fake till you make it, mentality, or is it truly more of a man, to just be myself and do what I like, like we always take about.

Dont get me wrong, I am no missionary only dude either. I love to switch around, I think I do a very good job, leading the interaction, yet, I am not really one to push the boundaries of straight penetration and I am pretty quiet. I don't say much and I make very little noise. Should I work on this? As a partener and for myself? Or again, should I stay true to what I like and what feels good to me?[/quote]

Again, too much in your head. Satisfy yourself. At the end of the day, that's the only thing that matters. If satisfaction is mutual, great; but it's not your problem to force compatibility. The same pretty much covers the rest of your post. Stop being a dildo. You're not a dildo. You're a man, you're a mammal, you're a human being and sexual expression is an expression of YOU.

 

[Wilko]

I don't have a huge n-count (probably because I call it an n-count amirite?), but I've been surprised at the lack of "experience" among the women I've dated. I'd better explain. Most of the girls I've been with have probably had between 10 and 20 partners at the time, but some were definitely much higher. So these girls were having plenty of sex with a bunch of different guys, but it was all pretty vanilla as far as I can tell. I was skeptical at first - a "slutty" 30 year old who's never had anything in her butt? Riiiiight. But it turns out that most men are too damn scared to take what they want - which is what these girls really seem to be looking for.

tl;dr: slutty does not equal adventurous

The pattern over the last few years has gone like this:

1. Make a decent connection with a passably attractive Gen-X/Y girl.

2. Despair at lacklustre first sexual encounter.

3. Discover girl is actually quite suggestible.

4. Patiently turn girl into anal junkie.

5. Girl realises I'm not about dat lyfe and leaves to find her beta bucks.

6. Girl's future partners reap the benefits of all my hard work - you're welcome f***ers.

7. Do it all again with a little less enthusiasm.

Not saying I want to settle down, just getting tired of coaching women who should already have their bedroom game sorted - I feel like I'm training staff for other employers.

Casual vacancy, experience preferred.

Not too much to ask.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

Why are they leaving to find beta AFCs?

 

[Serenity]

TL;DR
A quote by fast life got me started thinking about women, men and how we each experience uninhibited and great sex. What allows men and women to be completely uninhibited with one other and what makes sex truly great for each of us?

This is so true!

A man will never know a woman's dirtiest thoughts and desires or feel her full intensity of passion, and sexuality, even if she is bursting at the seams to let loose, unless she believes he can truly handle it and welcomes it.

She needs to know that she won't be judged or have what she shares with him, come back to haunt her. She needs to know that her deepest vulnerability and her free flowing raw sexuality massively turn him on and that he can handle anything she brings. She wants all of him and she wants to give him all of herself. She really does, yet she feels limited by the invitation she perceives.

I believe, in every encounter, a man sets the space of possibility and the outer limits for a woman's uninhibited expression more than he may imagine. (I'm not saying it's right or it's fair.)

Is this your experience of/with women? Is it something you even are aware of? Is your experience completely different?

It dawns in me, maybe the reverse is true for men in some way as well? Is that true?

Half true for me, I don't want an awkward situation and a womans liberated behavior comforts me. I feel free if she feels free. Sometimes though I recognize the woman being careful to not receive judgement and limit themselves, I don't like it and rather than talk I show. In that case I just know she wants to unfold, but holds back because she doesn't want to make it uncomfortable for me. But as with most fears, what we fear becomes true. She wants to prevent discomfort and that makes it uncomfortable for me, because I want her to feel free. I don't always recognize it, but I know a LOT of signs about it. When I do recognize it I do to her as I would have liked her doing to me in that situation, to demonstrate it's okay feel free. Sexually speaking I do so by letting go of my own false limitations and basically feel free to do what I want.

I find it somewhat complex to make things smooth sexually, there's a lot of societal pressure and not everyone knows how to not give a sh!t. What matters to me is not what everyone else thinks, not society, not my friends, not my parents and not this forum. The person who's opinion do matter is the woman I'm having sex with, because what we enjoy doing to each other is none of anyone's damn business. It concerns nobody else.

I'm open for a lot of things, I'm an experience curious person. I do however start with basics and let things develop as comfort level grows, I won't jump on the kinky stuff right away. Some things I've tried seemed better in ny mind, but when actually doing it turned out to not be as awesome as imagined. Fantasies won't always be as expected, but at least I tried it to confirm it. Other things turned out to feel fvcking amazing, those things I'll keep doing and especially if the woman loved it.

So sexuality develops both for me and the woman I fvck. She gets to try her things uninhibited and so do I, we both discover what turns us on and gives maximum pleasure. In a relationship which I'm in now we do this, the good thing is that she learns how to maximize my satisfaction and I learn how to maximize hers. It's a win-win, we could never have done that if we never tried anything new out of fear.

 

[zinc4]

It's really simple......just stop thinking so much and be free.

I like to be Scooby doo sometimes...have the outfit...

Threesomes with her...

Making her my slave...

Point is, it's the guys job to put her in whatever role u want and mske her submit.

 

[fastlife]

Half true for me, I don't want an awkward situation and a womans liberated behavior comforts me. I feel free if she feels free.

But that's being reactive and giving your agency away. That's letting her control the frame. That's codependency--same principle of 'I'm happy if you're happy.' Some girls will be nervous at first--but ultimately she feels what you feel and if you're relaxed and confident she's free to just react and to feel you (which is all women want anyway.

She wants to prevent discomfort and that makes it uncomfortable for me, because I want her to feel free.

Who are you to direct her emotional state? That's codependency. Take care of your own--she doesn't 'make you feel a certain way.' You choose to feel that way. Stop handing off your responsibility to yourself on the actions/emotions of other people--that's reacting, that's codependency; as a man, that's a form of emotional impotency.

The person who's opinion do matter is the woman I'm having sex with, because what we enjoy doing to each other is none of anyone's damn business. It concerns nobody else.

Why does her opinion matter? Is your self-worth tied up in her perception of you as a great, thoughtful lover? Does your ego need that validation?

Female sexual gratification is a sh1t test. Did anyone give a damn about a female orgasm pre-Feminism? Why do guys feel the need/pressure to get her off--to the extent that they get in their heads and dissociate from the human aspect of love-making? And why, do you think, the vast majority of women are unable to get off from penetration? Can't possibly be that they're ****ing robots that are performing calculations and monitoring her experience instead of letting her let go. By the very act of pandering to her sexual whims, you're supplicating and ultimately nerfing her experience of letting you take control.

For a while, I used to game a lot of older girls--I was young, inexperienced, and it was fun. Do you know what the most common sh1t test was? Something along the lines of, "I need a man that can munch the carpet--do you go down?" The only correct answer was "No" or "Not on you."

Don't get me wrong, I love eating pvssy for the right girl--but only because I want to, because I want to taste her, because she's pleasant, submissive, and takes care of herself. But I'll never eat pvssy to get a girl off or because she expects it--that's supplicating and emasculating.

I do however start with basics and let things develop as comfort level grows, I won't jump on the kinky stuff right away.

Why not?

She gets to try her things uninhibited and so do I, we both discover what turns us on and gives maximum pleasure. In a relationship which I'm in now we do this, the good thing is that she learns how to maximize my satisfaction and I learn how to maximize hers.

You get more comfortable and uninhibited overtime--she feels what you feel. The fact that you can't fully explore her sexuality the first night you meet her is totally on you. Granted, there's a degree of novelty that makes first-time sex with a new girl more likely to be vanilla just because you're immersed in the experience--but push the boundaries early. Plant the seeds for things you'll want to try later; let her experience you to the full extent of your sexual expression. That is what she wants.

 

[Serenity]

But that's being reactive and giving your agency away. That's letting her control the frame. That's codependency--same principle of 'I'm happy if you're happy.' Some girls will be nervous at first--but ultimately she feels what you feel and if you're relaxed and confident she's free to just react and to feel you (which is all women want anyway.

Sometimes I do sometimes I don't. I won't be happy if she's not happy, if there actually is anything I can do then I'll do it. I'm not fully co-dependent and I'm not fully independent, I do things that seem co-dependent but my independent part keeps it from growing into dysfunction. Meaning if she keeps herself feeling bad I'll push myself away from her.

Who are you to direct her emotional state? That's codependency. Take care of your own--she doesn't 'make you feel a certain way.' You choose to feel that way. Stop handing off your responsibility to yourself on the actions/emotions of other people--that's reacting, that's codependency; as a man, that's a form of emotional impotency.

I can't force her emotions straight out, but what I say does influence people. I won't be dumb and say "don't feel uncomfortable" or "I don't like when you feel uncomfortable". I'll just ask if she feels uncomfortable if she seems that way, if she does then I'll say I just wish her to feel good. Stating it without putting pressure, usually it lightens people's anxiety.

Why does her opinion matter? Is your self-worth tied up in her perception of you as a great, thoughtful lover? Does your ego need that validation?

Her opinion matters because I want to please her, but the woman herself should know better than anyone what feels good to her. My self-worth is based on everyone's perception of me, not my own perception of myself. I cannot be the judge of how what I do feels to someone else, just as nobody else can be the judge of how they treat me feels to me. I've had the sh!ttiest treatment from people who were self-righteous and flat out didn't give a fvck about how I felt, what they did was to me not good but they try convincing me it is. So do I believe their words or my judgement of their actions? You know the answer. Thus I can call myself the greatest human on earth, but it won't mean sh!t if others perceive me as an @sshole would it? However my ego can live without the validation, but I don't do nice things to others to feed my ego. I do it because I feel good and wants to spread the good vibes, there's nothing wrong in being nice. Those who doesn't like my kindness or mistakes it for weakness are welcome to resent me, I don't care about those people and I'm not forcing my kindness on them.

Female sexual gratification is a sh1t test. Did anyone give a damn about a female orgasm pre-Feminism? Why do guys feel the need/pressure to get her off--to the extent that they get in their heads and dissociate from the human aspect of love-making? And why, do you think, the vast majority of women are unable to get off from penetration? Can't possibly be that they're ****ing robots that are performing calculations and monitoring her experience instead of letting her let go. By the very act of pandering to her sexual whims, you're supplicating and ultimately nerfing her experience of letting you take control.

Because I love them and wish they get the same satisfaction out of it that I do. If they don't they will have no real personal reason to continue having sex with me will they? Also be aware that fairness is important to me, I don't find it fair and actually a turn off if I'm the only one enjoying it same if she's the only one enjoying it. Meaning if either one of us doesn't want to, then it's not gonna happen.

For a while, I used to game a lot of older girls--I was young, inexperienced, and it was fun. Do you know what the most common sh1t test was? Something along the lines of, "I need a man that can munch the carpet--do you go down?" The only correct answer was "No" or "Not on you."

You talk of being independent, but still you're influenced to say "no" because it's the correct answer in her mind. I would answer honestly according to how I feel about it, truth is I'd like doing that. Besides women have a sixth sense on these things, the guy saying yes only to get her to bed expresses himself differently from the guy saying yes because he sincierely likes it but expect nothing from answering a simple question.

Don't get me wrong, I love eating pvssy for the right girl--but only because I want to, because I want to taste her, because she's pleasant, submissive, and takes care of herself. But I'll never eat pvssy to get a girl off or because she expects it--that's supplicating and emasculating.

Dude, I wouldn't do something I don't want to for any reason. Don't mix me up with the weak guys lacking boundaries, I like going along with most things but I'm not afraid of saying no if I don't feel like doing something. I would do it to get her off if I want to do it myself. I won't do it if I don't want to, expectation is pressure for me and I won't accept it, she must respect a no from me if it comes. That's respecting personal boundaries and I do myself towards others, but comforting usually makes people drop their boundaries, but in the case of a firm no it's a no.

Why not?

(Context: why not jump on the kinky stuff right away?) Because with someone new it might be off-putting to do certain things right away. It also breaks the tension and progressive escalation, leading to going too far too soon which feels uncomfortable. I'll thus start simple and test where she puts her boundaries, which differs with every woman. It can get to the kinky stuff pretty fast, but that's if she's cooperating with my advances.

You

get more comfortable and uninhibited overtime--she feels what you feel. The fact that you can't fully explore her sexuality the first night you meet her is totally on you. Granted, there's a degree of novelty that makes first-time sex with a new girl more likely to be vanilla just because you're immersed in the experience--but push the boundaries early. Plant the seeds for things you'll want to try later; let her experience you to the full extent of your sexual expression. That is what she wants.

The fact that sexuality can't be fully explored the first night is only partly on me, I can't control her part in it. Both usually becomes less inhibited over time as we both know it's okay, but early on neither of us knows where the other person draws their line. I do push the boundaries, but it's still a balancing act. Too much too soon and I risk her becoming overwhelmed, too little too late and I risk stagnation and boredom. Sex does not take priority over feeling good, and sex isn't good if not mutually enjoyed.

 

[LiveFreeX]

I would really appreciate hearing from several more men about this.

A 45 y/o woman on a men's forum, what do you possibly hope to gain by being here?

 

[zinc4]

Just another cougar on the prowl it appears...

 

[LiveYourDream]

I would really appreciate hearing from several more men about this.

A 45 y/o woman on a men's forum, what do you possibly hope to gain by being here?

You specifically cut out the context and then repost a solitary sentence of mine. Next to it you question my presence on the forum and what I am looking to gain. To me this was done to stir up drama, because the very sentences you cut out of your re-post explained the context of the sentence that you posted as if it had none. See below.

I would really appreciate hearing from several more men about this. I am not sure how individual AF's experience is on this topic or if it speaks for most men. I would really appreciate any other sharings or insights offered, that might help me understand further. TY

I am here to understand men more deeply. As a read posts here to gain greater understanding, sometimes I feel I have a perspective that may assist and so I will contribute to a thread with the intent to be helpful if I feel I can.

It is clear to me by your post here and in other threads that you are not fond of my presence. You've made that blatantly clear. I accept that. Everyone has certain posters whose perspectives they appreciate more than others.

Going out of your way here to misquote me, to try and stir up a response from others, as you did in the other threads today, only detracts rather than adds value to the forums.

If you don't care for me or what I write, which you clearly don't, then put me on ignore so you don't see my posts or simply choose not to read them. Don't create unnecessary drama here. If you need more drama in your life, fulfill that need somewhere else. This isn't the place for that.

If you disagree with what I write, feel free to respectfully disagree with what I write. Please quote what you disagree with rather than creating some vague projection and character attack and not about what I wrote. Enough of the personal attacks or posts like these trying to stir up conflict. I am not interested. I am fairly confident that most here don't find value in unnecessary drama either.

Just another cougar on the prowl it appears...

Please read above.

 

[LiveFreeX]

If you disagree with what I write, feel free to respectfully disagree with what I write. Please quote what you disagree with rather than creating some vague projection and character attack and not about what I wrote. Enough of the personal attacks or posts like these trying to stir up conflict. I am not interested. I am fairly confident that most here don't find value in unnecessary drama either.

Protected Class, are you related to Jaylan?