Re:
There is but ONE love, and everything else is a perversion of it. In a social sense, the definition has been warped, so when women or parent's say "I Love you Do this," it's not love, which has caused a great many people harm, and to also RESENT love. This is a sad state.
One can say they LOVE humanity, with a positive emotion and expectation, want nothing, expect nothing and get nothing, and be OK with that, and feel as if we're one complete total connected unit.
You can still LOVE X's, but not feel affection or interest in them as partners. I've never had a person, an X I could say I held a deep hatred or even dislike for. I wished them all the best, whether I ended it or they did. The only person harmed by labeling people as love or unloved is you. And that's a perversion of the definition.
There's but one definition of love, and it can't be defined. I think some of what Jesus/God has gotten at is a good idea, though not the Christian/Catholic one, the untainted idea. I can say I love all members of Sosuave, whether some chuckle head takes it gay or not, and be totally pissed at them for a dumb post, but not have it effect my whole long-term outlook on them.
But again, everybody is wired up using, commercializing everything, they need results now, that everybody in their life must provide them something; positive emotion, favors, benies, women, wingman status, whatever. It's so lame.
We either come together as a species, or die as one, it doesn't matter. But today, we allow definitions to separate us, and yet, when you hang with someone who is defined differently, you probably enjoy them and their company and their momentary impact on your life.
Love isn't anything a person can do, and it certainly doesn't begin when you start marriage. If you love EVERYONE, including yourself, then the rosey glasses come off when you enter a relationship, and see it just as that, a relationship, a partnership, to create a life together, and maybe kids. But when it's LOVE, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, it's like this woman or man is your LOTTERY ticket. I'm going through that with a friend who is divorcing. In fact, they were friends of mine, they got together, and I have the woman seeing it as the end of the world, and the man seeing it as freedom. He saw the marriage as a relationship, not his only source of love as so many like to confuse it. She wasn't his wellspring of love, so he's in fact OK ending it, since they don't have a good outlook together, or similar wants. Yet she's near suicidal because of this misguided belief that LOVE can only exist in one source.
It exists in all sources, if you understand that. All humans have the potential for love, but maybe only a few WANT a relationship to develop with you. And unconditional love doesn't mean I let you drink yourself dumb, or gain excessive weight, or smoke to death, or drink and drive. Quite the opposite. You're not a door mat. And the music industry propragates this idea further than it should go. Nick Lahey and his whiney song don't help end the image of a knight in shining armor. Maybe if you're a girl with LOTS of bad luck and poor choices, a great guy comes along and is better than anyone before fine. But for a guy who's dated alot, most girls end up close to the same in body, looks, attitude, craziness, etc. It's the personality that changes it, and even then, no one is infallible.
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In fact, it IS NOT love when you only love one or two people. It's the opposite of love, it's more infatuation, or affection, because of some conscious or subconscious conditioning and comonality. How can it be love if you only confer certain benefits on a girl so long as she does things for you and acts a certain way toward you? Then you can take it away, and in that sense, it was just infatuation, or affection, or preferential treatment, not love.
And family, even then, a son/daughter or father/mother can do horrible, horrible things, and still love them, but not be near them. And maybe you don't wish the worst on them, but you can't be around them. That is love, too. But anything that has a beginning and ending IS not love. And developing that underlying RESPECT, BROTHERLYNESS, COMMONALITY, and GENERAL LOVE/ACCEPTANCE of humanity is a part of feeling oneness, of never feeling alone, because you don't know where a friend might come from. Because you don't know other people, and it's better to extend a helping hand, than a fist, or cast aspersions.
ONLY love is unconditional. It is NON Love if it has a condition. You can love a gf, but expect her to not cheat. And even if she does, you don't have to cease loving her, you just cease dating her. For many, that's a hard reach, and maybe even hard to grasp mentally, but that's the real poison of Earth right now. Everything is conditional, and commercialized. Alot of books don't speak on the positivity of being a oneness, at least as accepting each other as different, not necessarily molding as one.
When we're mad, we should really be mad at ourselves for placing labels and expectations on other's. I can't count the amount of times fight started because a GF or someone else EXPECTED, maybe didn't say it, but expected something, some benefit because you play a certain ROLE in their life. And then, the coup de gras, they say they love you. So do it! Please. Love has no expectation or condition.
You want a favor? Fine. But don't dangle love out there like it's bait and have someone do it because it's love. A mother doesn't just slave because of love. She loves her family and does what she has to do, but that doesn't mean you mooch amd bankrupt her or your family. Love doesn't give you that priviledge. A great book on this awakening is "Awareness." He covers some of the concepts I've spoken of very well and very vividly. And they're all true.
What is perceived as love isn't. It's sad. But love exists, this moment, it isn't developed. Interest is. Commonality. A relationship. But love is fundamental to life, it's the undercurrent. But most don't feel that on a surface level.
A-Unit