Trust your instincts

[Ebach]

6th sense? Come on guys. I think people who have observed other people know what it's all about.

Sometimes it might be the simple fact in the way you look at them you make them attractive and not some type of sense that they are already attracted. It could be that they're attracted and you can see from their behavior and what they say that they're hiding something but usually when girls hide something it's attraction towards the opposite sex. It's those general assumptions. The thing is that if you act favorably in a situation you would be found attractive and even if they didn't find you attractive they might after your approach. So it's hard to say whether you detected something going on or you actually produced some type of reaction with your actions. YOu just don't know. As far as knowing when someone is watching, I think we hear something, we smell something or whatever that's unusual and it's very possible that it occurs on an unconscious level but there must be some kind of change in the environment in order for us to know.

Actually, this is the type of sensing that soldiers use. Your hearing, sight, and smell must be really developed in order for you to be able to do that.

 

[Spike_the_cowboy]

LoL, talk about judging a book by its cover...

 

[Ebach]

I know right ;-)

Everyone says don't judge a book by its cover. But the cover is our perception. It's what we see. It's what we believe. So at the end everyone says don't do it but everyone does it and it's the only way to understand people.

 

[Spike_the_cowboy]

Not me, I like to read them.

 

[Ebach]

We're talking first impressions here. Good pun though ;-)

 

[ScrewIt]

Originally posted by Ebach
6th sense? Come on guys. I think people who have observed other people know what it's all about.

Sometimes it might be the simple fact in the way you look at them you make them attractive and not some type of sense that they are already attracted. It could be that they're attracted and you can see from their behavior and what they say that they're hiding something but usually when girls hide something it's attraction towards the opposite sex. It's those general assumptions. The thing is that if you act favorably in a situation you would be found attractive and even if they didn't find you attractive they might after your approach. So it's hard to say whether you detected something going on or you actually produced some type of reaction with your actions. YOu just don't know. As far as knowing when someone is watching, I think we hear something, we smell something or whatever that's unusual and it's very possible that it occurs on an unconscious level but there must be some kind of change in the environment in order for us to know.

Actually, this is the type of sensing that soldiers use. Your hearing, sight, and smell must be really developed in order for you to be able to do that.

Ebach is on track, there are times when a girl is really attracted to you, she'll be highly intimidated by you. and because of that, they will sometimes act differently/aloof around you, as in talks to everyone else but you and they give you kino with a specific vibe that you can tell they are attracted to you. I knwo what im talking about cause it happened to a friend i used to hang out with. Well usually stuff like this you can tell with signs beforehand..all these little clues/mysteries add to the obvious.

but i kind of understand what dirtheart means. it's like when you first meet a girl, both of you gaze into each other's eyes deeply for several seconds. it's almost like chemistry is created from t here.

 

[So pimp its scary]

I forget the exact exercise, but there is a way to train yourself so that if ANYONE in anydirection starts looking at you, you'll get a feeling.

Eyes have more power then they let on. It might come as an itch, or just a tingling, but I don't know how many times I've just had the urge to look around, and often it's because there was someone looking at me.

More then that and I'd just be speculating.

 

[SDBmania]

I see

So, then if it was just my AFC side trying to convince me of false feelings, that would exsplaint a lot. I have been working on attraction and trying to measure it. I have always thought that you should approach based on your own intrest, not only on her's, because it's hard to gauge it. But, now that I am an RAFC, I have noticed a huge change in the quality of life.

 

[Jariel]

I was thinking about this recently and realised that your instincts about interest are very dependent on your confidence levels. If you despise yourself, you will never sense any interest from anybody, yet if you're over-confident, you will sense that women are interested when they're not.

This is the problem with fake- or over-confidence. You tend to lose your grip on reality.

 

[golf299]

i have something to add to this post:

before i left for winter break i thought i got a feeling about this girl that i hung out with a couple times...there were no real IOI's, but i just had a feeling she was interested. i'm going back to school this weekend and i'm going to ask her out. i'll let you know if the 6th sense worked, in this case anyway...

 

[squirrels]

Sometimes you can't even detect it. Girls aren't active as much as they are REactive. So sometimes they just don't GIVE signs directly...you have to give HER a sign and see how she responds.

Like you may go out on a date and she may never touch you on her own, but if you put your arm around her when you're walking back to your car, she hugs up against you...then you're GOLDEN. And you wouldn't know unless YOU made the move.

 

[DjDreamer]

Originally posted by Jariel
I was thinking about this recently and realised that your instincts about interest are very dependent on your confidence levels. If you despise yourself, you will never sense any interest from anybody, yet if you're over-confident, you will sense that women are interested when they're not.

This is the problem with fake- or over-confidence. You tend to lose your grip on reality.

True...

Now the only way you can find out if your over-confident or not is to actualy go and interact with that woman...it's always best to try and validate ones hypothesis...

But on the flip side over-confidence can be a turn on for women.

 

[JSH]

I think instinct is important, back before i had ever dated a girl i went through a whole series of crushes, mainly girls with whom i got close and flirted and pissed around for a long time with. About three quarters of them, i instinctively thought they liked me back; since then when i have become more open and outgoing and of course, more successful with the ladies, i have discovered that of those who i thought liked me, they all did. It was just instinct that i homed for girls who liked me back. Its really quite interesting but also sad as i scotched so many opportunities.

I was so gutted, especially as i can see so many lost opportunities and read back into many of their actions. Ah well

Carpe Diem

 

[Fatality]

Originally posted by SDBmania
Well, my intuition has been wrong every time! Every time I think a girl is into me, turns out she's not. I have been doing some fine tuning, but so far it's hard to tell if there has been an improvement.

Maybe they did like you and maybe you said or did something wrong which killed your chances. All it takes is one screwup with some women and you are done.

 

[Jariel]

I wanted to bump this old discussion topic and get some more opinions.

I think too many guys analyse way too deeply and wait around forever for textbook signals, when an instinctive impression is usually a lot more reliable.

Even with women you know and see regularly, there can be certain vibes they give off that feels like they're drawing you in. Or sometimes you might feel like you're being repelled.

Any more experiences with this?

 

[ScrewIt]

Originally posted by Dirtheart
Do you ever get a sense that a girl finds you attractive without even picking up particular signals? It's like when you look at her and you can instinctively detect some internal reaction inside her without actually seeing it? Or you suddenly detect a change of mood.

In all the instances I'm aware of, it has been right and I was speaking to some friends recently too, trying to explain what I mean and they agree that they have never been wrong about it either.

Attraction is instinctive, so why not learn to trust it?

Dirtheart i know what you mean i've had this feeling and still do. It's almost as if you're out on a date with your gf, and these other girls you walk past are eyeing you like an eagle. You get the feeling that they want you, but it is probably more lust driven...initially anyway.

However, these girls are good at playing games too. Even if you approach them, they may act aloof or indifferent as someoen stated earlier.

That's the trouble here, its hard to measure true interest vs. ego rubbing intentions. But the only way to find out is to approach them.
But from experience most of these girls are just after the ego boost that their sexually driven mind demands from the guy, that's when they turn aloof.

 

[O Snap]

I always try to follow my gut instinct in almost all aspects of life. The instinct you have is there for a reason, all you have to do is use it. If you follow your instinct, many things can happen,

you don't over evaluate everything, leaving you thinking about something that doesnt really matter(i used to over evaluate this one girl all the time...o she just touched my shoulder and i have been making her laugh, she must like me because she is being really flirty...etc)

from my knowledge, dating is a game, and like all other games, it is better to go off of a reaction than over evaluating. Imagine playing a sport where you anlayzed every single play happening, you would be too slow to keep up! Stick with your gut and go for it! Sometimes you are wrong, but most of the time, my gut instinct has been right.

 

[Maybnoob]

I Made a thread on this a while a go... Heres what i posted:



The gut Feeling
I think the problem with a lot of us males is that we have forgooton our natural god given gift of knowing when a girl is interested or not (something naturals have retainrd).
A lot of new guys are coming here and asking the question thats been asked the most: What are the body language signs a woman shows shes interested? Well i cant complain ask i used to ask the same question. But i have come to realise the error of my ways and the natural ability installed in all us of knowing when a girls is interested or not. We dont need to study a thesis on body language signals to know if a girls like us or not.
I have come to realise that we are all able to tell if a girl is interested or not and displaying the approach signal without studying her. How? Because of the feeling we get in our gut. Something tells us that a girl is interested, u get this buzz. I earlier read a psychology writing about how our subconcious are able to communicate with other peoples sub concious. You see we cant control our subconcious. When a girl sees you and is interested, her subconcious tells your subconcious sees interested through little body movement we dont pick up.
Thats why initially for some people they can just tell shes interested because they have a gut feeling. Thats why so many DJs are always talking about following your Gut. I am now able to recognise this feeling.
But your saying that you still get shot down? Well thats because subconciously she likes you but here ego comes into force and her conditioning takes over. And thats when all the dj techniques we have learned come into force so you can take away all her conditioning and come to the attraction she had for you in the beginning.

I dont believe in the concept of maknig someone attracted to you, i beleive in the concept of getting to that initial attraction she originally had before her ego came into force.

Well there you go, i cant remember where the article i read about our subconcious and attraction but ill try to get it.

 

[O Snap]

This is the best example i have.

I was hanging out with one of my best friends at a party, and he brought this girl over that he has been dating for about 2 weeks. I already kind of knew her before and she is pretty cute, but since she is my friends girl, she will probably never have a chance with me.

I was joking around with her a lot(pretty easy to do when you know they dont have a chance and you dont care how they react anyways ) and she just gives me this look. I dont know what was so wierd about it, or why i thought it was so special, but i knew right then i could kiss her in front of my friend and she would have been alright with it. She didnt say anything, she just laughed at what i had said and smiled.

I obviously tried to dismiss it and just decided to leave the room. 3 weeks later we were all hanging out again, and when my friend leaves, she tells me she has a crush on me.

Sometimes you just know!

 

[Palomo]

I agree with most of the threads posted here, i think u should build some report, i think your intuition just shows you that this girl is subconsciously interested in you, but if u start talking to her, and she sees your charm, u got it men!!!