Tour Guide Woman Update

oc16

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Some of you saw a post the other day where I was 2.5 hours away from home and toured a historical home. It was just the tour guide and me and I thought she was attractive and looked my age (late 30's to mid 40's). The only IOI I really got from her was that she seemed nervous, but we did make some small talk.

The next day I e-mailed the head curator and told her I was on the tour with Denise and I wanted to leave my contact with her since we are both passionate with history. Prior to doing that however, I also left a nice review on Google and they replied they will pass that information along to her.

This morning I did get an e-mail from her Thanking me for the "Shout Out" and she wished she could of been on her A game (but I thought she was good) and a little better. She thanked me again for being on the tour and said she hoped I enjoyed some other place that I told her I was visiting. She did not ask any open ended questions in the e-mail.

I did not write her back yet (Perhaps tomorrow) but I have two strategies in mind:

1.) I write her back with a few sentences but I don't put anything in there that requires a response (Open ended question). If her IL is high enough and if she even single, she will write back regardless.

2.) I cut right to the chase, tell her I think she is attractive/(do I ask if she is married?/single?) and see if she would interested in meeting me in Philly one night for a drink (That is the half way point)

What do you think?
 

oc16

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If anything do this. Then you know
That was my plan or do I try and establish some more rapport with her before I pull the trigger?

I would think that she probably knows that I like her since I left my contact info, unless she is very naive.
 

oc16

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She knows. You could talk history a bit more. Here we are with this "in common" subject again. Too close to friend vibe without sex. Sex is the glue in any relationship. Intimacy some call it but I call it smash.
Shoot your shot sooner then later.
Thanks for the input, I am just gonna go right for the jugular and ask her out. As Corey Wayne says, save the small talk for the date, none of this back and forth over text, e-mail, etc.

I have a feeling she is married anyway. She is a volunteer and I saw her on a Tuesday. Somebody else must be supporting her.

Only one way to find out. Either way, she will be flattered.
 

Modern Man Advice

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Some of you saw a post the other day where I was 2.5 hours away from home and toured a historical home. It was just the tour guide and me and I thought she was attractive and looked my age (late 30's to mid 40's). The only IOI I really got from her was that she seemed nervous, but we did make some small talk.

The next day I e-mailed the head curator and told her I was on the tour with Denise and I wanted to leave my contact with her since we are both passionate with history. Prior to doing that however, I also left a nice review on Google and they replied they will pass that information along to her.

This morning I did get an e-mail from her Thanking me for the "Shout Out" and she wished she could of been on her A game (but I thought she was good) and a little better. She thanked me again for being on the tour and said she hoped I enjoyed some other place that I told her I was visiting. She did not ask any open ended questions in the e-mail.

I did not write her back yet (Perhaps tomorrow) but I have two strategies in mind:

1.) I write her back with a few sentences but I don't put anything in there that requires a response (Open ended question). If her IL is high enough and if she even single, she will write back regardless.

2.) I cut right to the chase, tell her I think she is attractive/(do I ask if she is married?/single?) and see if she would interested in meeting me in Philly one night for a drink (That is the half way point)

What do you think?
First things first, you live 2.5 hours away from where you met her. Does she live 2.5 hours as well? Long-distance rarely works and there is a lot of effort involved. Just take that into consideration.

Also, keep in mind women that you meet while they work are hard to read. They might be friendly because she has to or she is pretty much in work "mode". You don't want to waste your time by going back and forth and gauging interest. You want to go for it and find out and move on if she says no.

So having said that, I would go straight to the point. You know what you like and want, and you go get it. I would just say that found her passion for history very attractive as you are also passionate about history and would love to get to know her more. Trying to be fancy or creative would be unecessary.

Keep us updated.

Modern Man Advice
 

oc16

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First things first, you live 2.5 hours away from where you met her. Does she live 2.5 hours as well? Long-distance rarely works and there is a lot of effort involved. Just take that into consideration.

Also, keep in mind women that you meet while they work are hard to read. They might be friendly because she has to or she is pretty much in work "mode". You don't want to waste your time by going back and forth and gauging interest. You want to go for it and find out and move on if she says no.

So having said that, I would go straight to the point. You know what you like and want, and you go get it. I would just say that found her passion for history very attractive as you are also passionate about history and would love to get to know her more. Trying to be fancy or creative would be unecessary.

Keep us updated.

Modern Man Advice
Yes, she lives 2.5 hours away I assume.

Thanks for the tip
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

oc16

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Yes, she lives 2.5 hours away I assume.

Thanks for the tip
She replied this morning, but I was going to wait until tomorrow to do it (reply) Should I just do it now? Does it matter?
 

bat soup

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She replied this morning, but I was going to wait until tomorrow to do it (reply) Should I just do it now? Does it matter?
The longer you wait, the more you build it up into some big thing that it shouldn't be, because there's a fair chance she won't be interested or will just ignore you.
 

corrector

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She replied this morning, but I was going to wait until tomorrow to do it (reply) Should I just do it now? Does it matter?
This is getting good. Reply right away! Lets see where this is going. Keep the show going on here.
 

GT40

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I just sent the reply.
If she’s replying she’s into you. Make the move. Red Pill this. Be the leader and take control man
 

oc16

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I had written her yesterday that I found her passion for history very attractive and would like to get to know her better. I said we should meet up for drinks in Philly (halfway point for either of us)


She replied this morning with

Aww, so sweet....'As much as I would like to, my life is very complicated at the moment

Thank you so much for the compliment

Well at least she didn't say she was married or had a boyfriend . Although I'm not holding my breath, she could reappear 6 months down the road.
 

oc16

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Good attitude man
Thanks and I guess she was attracted to me somewhat since she wrote back and said "as much as I would like that my life is very complicated right now." She could of just said "Thanks for the offer, but my life is very complicated right now.
 

bat soup

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Thanks and I guess she was attracted to me somewhat since she wrote back and said "as much as I would like that my life is very complicated right now." She could of just said "Thanks for the offer, but my life is very complicated right now.
She must have really liked you if she gave you that excuse.
 

andreihaha

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Thanks for the input, I am just gonna go right for the jugular and ask her out. As Corey Wayne says, save the small talk for the date, none of this back and forth over text, e-mail, etc.

I have a feeling she is married anyway. She is a volunteer and I saw her on a Tuesday. Somebody else must be supporting her.

Only one way to find out. Either way, she will be flattered.
Nah, no small talk for the date. I say, no small talk at all. I hate small talk, why would I talk with a person I'm attracted to about weather? Maybe just if she's cold and I put my coat around her so she makes the deer eyes and go in for the kiss as well. But then it's not small talk any more.

Life's too short for small talk.

Also good that you didn't beat around the bush in the end. Taking initiative is always better, otherwise you'll be stuck with uncertainty and getting into another "oneitis" vortex. No thank you. We got better things to do.
 

oc16

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Nah, no small talk for the date. I say, no small talk at all. I hate small talk, why would I talk with a person I'm attracted to about weather? Maybe just if she's cold and I put my coat around her so she makes the deer eyes and go in for the kiss as well. But then it's not small talk any more.

Life's too short for small talk.

Also good that you didn't beat around the bush in the end. Taking initiative is always better, otherwise you'll be stuck with uncertainty and getting into another "oneitis" vortex. No thank you. We got better things to do.
Yeah I'm glad I did as well.

This woman wasn't beautiful, but cute.

I love history and here is this woman who is not some senior citizen leading a house tour in a cute 19th century dress. She also looked like she had a large chest

To me it was the ideal situation to meet someone, so I gave it a shot.

However I wasn't really getting any IOI's from her other than the fact she seemed nervous and maybe played with her hair 2x.

Oh well. Glad I got closure and It proved to me I CAN be interested in dating women close to my age range (I'm 44) depending on the situation.

I also have a bad habit of putting certain women on pedestals before I even know them. I had this woman on a pedestal after a 45 minute guided tour, yet I knew nothing about her (other than her name). When I asked if she was a history major in college she just replied "no " and didn't elaborate.
 
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Atom Smasher

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Women will play with their hair for two reasons: Attraction, or nervousness. When it’s because of attraction, it’s obviously preening and grooming but also nervousness. Otherwise, its just nervousness and an attempt at self-reassurance.

In your case I would say it was out of nervousness. Else she would have given CLEAR evidence of attraction.

I think that you didn’t make the interaction light-hearted and fun, the essential ingredient of attraction. I’ll bet the tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife.
 

oc16

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Women will play with their hair for two reasons: Attraction, or nervousness. When it’s because of attraction, it’s obviously preening and grooming but also nervousness. Otherwise, its just nervousness and an attempt at self-reassurance.

In your case I would say it was out of nervousness. Else she would have given CLEAR evidence of attraction.

I think that you didn’t make the interaction light-hearted and fun, the essential ingredient of attraction. I’ll bet the tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife.
How do you know dude? You weren't there. I think I did crack one joke and the whole time I made sure I was listening to what she was saying and I asked questions showing I was genuinely interested in the topic.

I was also mindful of my body language not to stand with my arms crossed since that can be seen that I am bored or wishing I was somewhere else.

Since she seemed a little nervous, I did a few things to make her feel more comfortable.
 

bat soup

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Yeah I'm glad I did as well.

This woman wasn't beautiful, but cute.

I love history and here is this woman who is not some senior citizen leading a house tour in a cute 19th century dress. She also looked like she had a large chest

To me it was the ideal situation to meet someone, so I gave it a shot.

However I wasn't really getting any IOI's from her other than the fact she seemed nervous and maybe played with her hair 2x.

Oh well. Glad I got closure and It proved to me I CAN be interested in dating women close to my age range (I'm 44) depending on the situation.

I also have a bad habit of putting certain women on pedestals before I even know them. I had this woman on a pedestal after a 45 minute guided tour, yet I knew nothing about her (other than her name). When I asked if she was a history major in college she just replied "no " and didn't elaborate.
The only real test is whether she cooperates. She didn't.
 
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