Today, in English class

krd

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This summer, I’ve been taking an English course at night. My teacher usually sees me waiting in the lobby after class as he is leaving. From chatting with him after class, he knows I usually get a ride home from my mom. Today in class we were reading a short story having to do with class (as in upper, middle and lower—okay, how many times have I said the word “class” so far?:)). During the discussion, we were talking about how most people of average income don’t have certain things. He jokingly mentions that I was an exception because of my “chauffeur”. Thank God he didn’t mention it was my mom—that would have been embarrassing!

As I was waiting outside the building after calling my mom, I see one of the girls in my class walk by. I think I said, “Have a good night”, and she chimes in “I know how you feel. Do you have a car?” I said no. She asked me how old I was and I told her I was 24. She says, “That really sucks.” I said “Yeah, but what are you gonna do?” She mentions she’s surprised I didn’t have one. I replied that I just couldn’t afford it. She tells me how she’s only had her car for a few months and how much of a pain it was to have to bum rides off people. She offers to give me a ride if I live up by her way. (She’s actually the second person to offer. My teacher did as well, although I don’t live up by where he is.) She asked where I lived and I told her, but she wasn’t quite sure where it was at first. So I did my best describing certain landmarks, and it eventually rang a bell with her. We had a nice conversation about school, our studies, class, and general stuff like that. She was very friendly and stuck around, until I said “Well, that’s my ride.” (Of course, I didn’t tell her it was my mom.) We actually continued to talk as we were walking towards our cars (or in my case, my mom’s car) and I said “Good luck with your paper and I’ll see you later.” So I think I might take her up on her offer. It would definitely save my mom some trouble.

So my question will simply be this: What do you guys make of this situation?
 
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Eternal

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So does the girl...not that anything is wrong with that!
 

krd

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Originally posted by Starman
Your english teacher wants to tongue your balls.
Well, then he could have given me a better grade on my last paper!:) Seriously, though...
 

htemorp

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I wasn't there, but sounds like she's just being friendly. Did you check out her fingers? Maybe next time you should sit next to her in class and continue the friendliness.
 

SLIKKER_THAN_AVG

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Originally posted by htemorp
I wasn't there, but sounds like she's just being friendly. Did you check out her fingers? Maybe next time you should sit next to her in class and continue the friendliness.
I agree...i know it sounds crazy but there are some girls out there with a good heart lol. Seriously though it sounds like shes just being friendly with you....lets say your roles are reversed..you see a girl..waiting for a ride...would you offer her a ride if she was good looking and still just do it to be friendly and not have any interest in her?

Of course not..but a girl would! lol

Who knows i could be wrong...so next time see if you can work that and see if you can get her digits..keep us posted

Peace
 

davelmn2003

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I think she's just being friendly too. A girl in my class gave me the same offer (which I took up), and she gave me a ride for the whole semester.

ACTUALLY, it was her husband who did all the driving. I don't think she wanted to "tongue my balls"....well, if she did, I missed out big time! hahaha Seriously, no, just being friendly in my case. Who knows what she's thinking in your case. I'd say at least she doesn't think badly of you. Go find out!!
 

vdk

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dude, it means nothing. I've had rides in cars from 3 women in my 2 yrs in university. Trust me in those lifts those women wanted someone to talk to and could tell they couldnt stand being alone. It was a small price to pay for saving time and money on public transport!!

Hate to tell you this but her giving you a ride in her car is nothing. University students tend to be nice and generous - just dont take it seriously.

If you really like her continue to build good rapport with her in the car, however, let her come over and sit next to you in class. I find university chicks tend to eject when you give too many signals your interested eg sit next to her in class, ask her out for lunch, calling her etc. If you can keep contact to a minimum you can definately be out of her LJBF category.
 

krd

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Did I check out her fingers? What--to see if she's engaged?! But I agree that she's probably just being friendly. After all, what do I have that any of the other guys in my class don't have (besides lack of a car)? She actually gave my friend a ride back to his dorm on the first day of class (before he dropped out). The only difference is that he made an effort to chat her up and actually got her number (under the guise of "just in case I miss an assignment, you know?";) )

I do sit near her in class in the next row, about one desk over. Actually there's this other hot blond girl that sits right next to me, but I haven't gotten the nerve to talk to her yet. There's only three girls in the class, so I guess this girl is the next best thing. I think I should wait a little to go for the number, since I see her in class all the time. I'd actually have the luxury of being able to build a rapport with her, so going for it right away may seem a little desperate (unless I use my friend's tactic, which I've been told, is a pretty weak move).

So I guess right now I should think about how to act on the ride home. I don't want to make her uncomfortable, but I don't want her to forget I'm a guy, either. If she were totally, completely not interested, there's nothing I can do, but I doubt she finds me appalling. If things don't happen, I think it would most likely be because of something I'm doing wrong. I'd just like to go about things in the right way, if anything, just to get some practice.

Vdk, you say I should keep contact to a minimum? How minimum? I don't like talking on the phone much, so I definitely won't be calling all the time. But that, and asking her to lunch--to me these seem like normal things you've got to do if you ever expect to get anywhere.
 
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Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

htemorp

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I don't know how you flow, but it doesn't sound like you're an establish C&F DJ. This seems to work for some of my friends, I never tried it personally. Make the intention of asking her out to study dates as study partners, chat her up, find out more about her but also keeping it casual, like a coffee date but less threatening. That's a good opening, or just chat with her in class...
 

krd

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Originally posted by htemorp
I don't know how you flow, but it doesn't sound like you're an establish C&F DJ.
That, I'm certainly not. In fact I don't know if she'd even be the type of girl that would go for the C&F routine. Would probably work for that hot blonde, though.
 

htemorp

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Maybe not ****y, it doesn't always work with everyone, but funny is one of the most essential things for women. If you ask 100 women what they look for in a man, 99% of them will say, "someone that can make me laugh."
 

krd

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Originally posted by htemorp
Maybe not ****y, it doesn't always work with everyone, but funny is one of the most essential things for women. If you ask 100 women what they look for in a man, 99% of them will say, "someone that can make me laugh."
Good point.
 

krd

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I just called my friend on the phone just to see how he was doing, and I told him about the incident. He says he's already gone out with this girl. He gave me some helpful tips on what to expect if I ever do go out with her.

He says she's not looking for a serious relationship right now. She just got out of one because it turned into some long distance thing and she'd rather not be seriously involved.

If we go out, she will most likely expect me to pay for everything. My friend took her to the movies, and he says the only reason she paid for the tickets was that his credit card wouldn't go through. Later on when they went to grab a bite at the mall, she told the cashier to ring them up together. So he ended up having to pay for both their food.

I'm not against paying, but what do you guys think? Was it wrong for him to have to pay, or was it only fair, since he's the one who asked her out? It appears that my friend was LJBFed, but his wallet certainly wasn't. How would I avoid something like this happening to me?
 

rbd

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Originally posted by krd
Did I check out her fingers? What--to see if she's engaged?! But I agree that she's probably just being friendly. After all, what do I have that any of the other guys in my class don't have (besides lack of a car)? She actually gave my friend a ride back to his dorm on the first day of class (before he dropped out). The only difference is that he made an effort to chat her up and actually got her number (under the guise of "just in case I miss an assignment, you know?";) )

I do sit near her in class in the next row, about one desk over. Actually there's this other hot blond girl that sits right next to me, but I haven't gotten the nerve to talk to her yet. There's only three girls in the class, so I guess this girl is the next best thing. I think I should wait a little to go for the number, since I see her in class all the time. I'd actually have the luxury of being able to build a rapport with her, so going for it right away may seem a little desperate (unless I use my friend's tactic, which I've been told, is a pretty weak move).

So I guess right now I should think about how to act on the ride home. I don't want to make her uncomfortable, but I don't want her to forget I'm a guy, either. If she were totally, completely not interested, there's nothing I can do, but I doubt she finds me appalling. If things don't happen, I think it would most likely be because of something I'm doing wrong. I'd just like to go about things in the right way, if anything, just to get some practice.

Vdk, you say I should keep contact to a minimum? How minimum? I don't like talking on the phone much, so I definitely won't be calling all the time. But that, and asking her to lunch--to me these seem like normal things you've got to do if you ever expect to get anywhere.
Take her up on the offer, she's being a nice person to you. Get a ride home from her at first, and see what works out from there. But definately, STOP PLANNING. Tell your brain to shut up, it is overactive on this matter, and that's the main reason why you're making a big deal out of all of this.

krd, from what I can tell, your main issue is that you worry too much! SHE'S JUST A GIRL FOR CHRIST'S SAKE. Definately start riding with this girl, talk to her, but in order to be successful, you must not analyize the situation so much. I used to do the same exact thing because I thought girls were this WIERD ALIEN SPECIES that wanted to bite my head off (the big head, lol). In reality they're human just like we are.

Talk to that blonde girl by you too, say something and watch her respond....I promise you she wont bite your head off.

Robby
 

rbd

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Originally posted by krd
I'm not against paying, but what do you guys think? Was it wrong for him to have to pay, or was it only fair, since he's the one who asked her out? It appears that my friend was LJBFed, but his wallet certainly wasn't. How would I avoid something like this happening to me?
Pay for everything. Be a chump. Be used. Then just react like you feel like it.

Why? Because it will help get you out of this rut. I had to react to situations like an insecure azzhole or a baby in order to truly see the error of my ways and make lasting improvements. I really messed up in some situations, but without those screwups, I wouldn't be where I am today, and it's for the better.

I might be wrong, but from what I can tell from what I've read, you're so worried about messing up that your brain just seems to seize up around girls. What I'm saying is that you should pick a path and go through with it. Who cares if you mess up, it's the best way to learn.
 

am4591

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Normally I'd say don't pay jacksh!t, but if she was giving me rides, I wouldn't mind buying her dinner or something. Or at least pay for part of the gas.
 

krd

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I don't think I'm even going to ask her out. At least not for now. For one thing, I'll be going where my friend's already been before, and from what he's told me--it wasn't very far. Basically if I go out with her, she'll probably be thinking "That's the second (or third, or fourth, etc.) guy I've give in a ride to that's asked me out". I'll just be another chump that she gets to take advantage of. Why should I give her the satisfaction? I don't think she deserves another stroke to her ego.

I've been out with girls before on non-dates. One recent case in point: those two I posted about recently. Way before that, there was this girl who's boyfriend was away in Peru, and she took me with her to visit her ex-boyfriend at Walmart. Later on, she took me to visit her current boyfriend's mom! She was obviously using me for social proof. So doing something like that again certainly wouldn't help me "get out" of anything.

If there was a way I could somehow get her to be interested in me, then maybe it would be a possibility that we could go out sometime. That's why I was concerned about acting in the right way, so I could make the right impression. But considering my track record with women, it'll be a cold day in hell before I can get any woman to be interested in me. So I'll let her drive me home, at least I'll be getting something out of the whole thing. Save my mom a trip.
 

krd

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I just noticed that this thread is in the High School Forum. How did it get there?
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

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